Title: Not Just a Career Woman
Series: Law & Order: CI
Pairing: Barek/Logan
Rating: More than Teen, but not Mature, so I'd say R.
Spoilers: 'Dollhouse'
Summary: After being called a 'career woman' by a suspect's mother, Barek takes a look at her priorities.
"Dani and I are mothers...Claire is a career woman, just like you." As the words left the grandmother's mouth, the energy quickly drains from my body. I stand there in shock of the words that are directed at me. How can any one say something so horrible like that with out knowing the other person? I can feel Logan's eyes bore in to the back of my neck and I pray that he will not bring this up later.
I clench my jaw, trying to hold back the tears that threaten to escape from the corner of my eyes. I can NOT break down in front of my partner. I have never before shed a tear in public and I will not start to now. It's not like I have never thought of having children. Sure, I've thought about what family life would be like for me, but I know I just haven't found the right guy yet. Well, I have found the right guy...we just dance around the issue instead of addressing it. No matter how much I tell myself that words don't hurt, and I am fine with my life just the way it is...it's no use. I don't know how I am not on the floor in a jumbled heap of crying mess. I almost jump when I feel his hand slide in to mine and give me a reaffirming squeeze. I look down at where our hands are joined and the only thing that pops in my head is that it looks natural for them to be together. I make no move to release my hand from his grasp as he tugs at me to follow him in leaving. Imagine my surprise when he pulls me in to an embrace His arms encircle me and press me up against his broad chest.
"Oh Caro...." He breathes in as he hugs me. I let a silent tear fall as I squeeze my eyes shut tightly. He's so warm, so comfortable, so right. We both take a second to savor this moment before we head back to our normal roles as detectives. I look up at Logan when he doesn't pull his hand away from mine. The corners of his lips twist to a smirk and he squeezes my hand one more time, answering the question in my eyes. Of course, we'll talk later.
I throw myself in to solving this case as to distract my mind from all the thoughts and emotions churning inside me. No matter how I try to push those nagging issues to the back of my brain, the more I want to punch my desk in frustration and run out of the precinct. Men have no idea how much pressure is on a woman. In today's society women have this pressure to be a mother, raise a family, AND be successful in the workforce. With all that pressure, one of those areas is bound to lag behind. I'm not a failure if I've put my career in front of every thing else for now. Yeah, I've ignored that stupid silent ticking of my biological clock deep within my womb. I keep telling myself that my career is too dangerous to raise a child with, that I'm better off by myself than end up being unhappy later on down the road because I've made the wrong choice. I glance up when I feel Logan's eyes on me. He's looking at me with a puzzled look, like he's trying to see the wheels turning in my head as I'm thinking. I scribble down 'Later, after work.' on the notepad and push it his way. He writes his response 'I'm taking you for a drink.' I nod and we set back to finishing the reports to hand in to our Captain. I heave a loud sigh as the clock approaches the end of the day for us. Logan jerks his head in a nod towards the elevators in a silent request to follow him. I obey, my body automatically following him without my consent. Strangely, I am not angry at this fact.
I am in robot mode as I follow Logan to where ever he may lead me. After a few blocks we get on the subway, then exit at the next stop and continue on for a few more blocks. When I raise my head I find that we have stopped in front of this quaint little pub. Its exterior looks warm and inviting. Logan walks in with a familiar ease about him, as he heads towards the back booths. He takes my coat from me and hangs it up on the hook outside of the booth. A moment later a waitress appears at the table asking for any drink orders. I glance at Logan before quietly ordering a beer. He places his order and the waitress hurries off to get the drinks ready. I try to look every where else aside from directly at him. If I look at him, and gaze in to those beautiful rich brown eyes of his I will completely lose it. I shiver as his stare penetrates my very being, he chuckles at my discomfort. Damn him and his smirk! I want to smack it right off of his face at the moment. Oh, I am so tempted.
"Caro, how are you feeling? I know that the woman's comments got to you, I could see it." This is a whole new side of Logan that I am seeing for the first time. His concerned look is very sincere, and I suddenly find myself blurting out my feelings at the drop of a hat.
I let out an angry grunt as I start to spill. "That comment really hurt me. I mean, she doesn't know me or my life. How can she sit there and comment when she doesn't even know me?" I don't wait for any answer before continuing on. "She had no right to say that. I'll admit that it hurt deeply. I admitted it to myself earlier today that maybe I have been a little too career focused and have neglected my personal life." I drop my head and stare at the table, a tear making its way down my cheek. I feel his finger caress my cheek and wipe away the tear.
"I'm so sorry Caro. She had no right to say that. If she knew you, she would agree with me that you're great at what you do, and I wouldn't change a thing about you." I feel the seat beside me dip as he settles next to me. His arm wraps around my shoulders and draws me closer to him, I give in. "I think you haven't had a personal life because you haven't found the right person yet."
I look up towards him, quirking an eyebrow. "And how would you know if I've met any one or not?"
He fumbles for an answer. He's cute when he's flustered. "I mean, not like it's any of my business. But I would like to wager that the right man is sitting right next to you."
I gasp at his statement. He catches me off guard, sweeping in for a kiss. Our lips meet, he presses tenderly yet possessively. I can feel my legs quiver at the sensations flowing through me. Oh God...help me, I think am going to die of pleasure! Never have I been kissed like that before! This man is amazing! He pulls away, both of us trying to catch our breaths.
"I'm sorry Caro. I should've asked." He quickly gets out. I put a finger to his lips to hush him.
"No need to apologize. I wanted you to kiss me. I've wanted you to kiss me since the day I was paired up with you." I confess, my cheeks turning a rosy hue in embarrassment.
His finger lifts my chin up so my gaze meets his. I feel myself just drowning in the depths of his eyes. My breath leaves me as he devours me with his stare. Next thing I know his lips are upon mine again in another searing kiss. His tongue begs entrance to my mouth. I part my lips, letting him inside me, dominating my mouth. A moan escapes my throat as shocks of pleasure shoot through me. When we part I whimper at the distance between us. Out of the corner of my eye I see the waitress returning with our drinks. Logan moves back to his own side as they are placed on the table. I am suddenly freezing with out his body heat next to mine.
"You have no idea how much I have wanted you since day one. I know I flirt, but I never wanted to cross that invisible line. Now I know I should have, but we can make up for that." His hands reach across the table and grab mine. They're warm, and feel so nice wrapped around my cold digits. I catch myself starting to tear up over what he says to me. So much wasted time, when we could have been together. We'll definitely have to make up for it. Again, his fingertips wipe away my tears. I decide that I like that caring side of Mike, and I know he'll only show that side to me and put up a brave front to every one else. I smile wide as I look in to his eyes, responding to the look of love shining through.
"We'll have to make up for lost time, ya know?" I inquire to him, my eyes silently pleading with him to take me home and make love to me. The look I receive in return makes me shiver, the pure lust and hunger piercing me.
He suddenly stands up, exiting the booth. He gathers our coats, and pulls me up. Searching his wallet, he throws payment plus tip on the table. His hand grabs mine and practically drags me out of the pub. As we exit, he pauses to think for a second. "Ya wanna go to my place?"
I nod quickly and allow him to lead me to his apartment. It wasn't too far down from the pub. We hop in an elevator and as soon as the doors close, he pins me against the wall. His lips eagerly search out mine and he crushes in to me. His kiss is bruising and fiercely territorial, his hands roam along my body, fingers brushing against my nerves and igniting my body in a blaze of arousal. I struggle to not moan out loud, failing. He grinds in to me when he hears me moan. Oh God! The size of his hard dick is bigger than I ever imagined! I wonder how he's going to feel inside me. I bet he's going to stretch me out nicely. I push him away regrettably and we try to compose ourselves when the elevator stops at his floor. We all but run to his door, he quickly unlocks it and we hurry inside. When the door is shut behind me, I feel him push me up against it, my legs automatically wrapping around his waist. We kiss each other with a hunger I have never experienced before. The taste of him makes me melt. He pushes my coat off of me, then shrugs his own off. With out letting me go, he carries me to his bedroom and gently sets me down on the bed. We break apart for only a second as we take our shirts off, then return and his hands glide up and down my chest, his fingertips hitting my sensitive nipples, making them harden in to little pebbles. I nearly cry out at this sensation. His hands reach around me and unclasp my bra, slipping it off my shoulders. I blush when I hear his low whistle of approval.
"Oh my God Caro. You are so fucking beautiful. You have no idea how much you turn me on, no idea. Let me show you how you affect me." Mike pulls me in to him, flush against his body. I can certainly feel his arousal pressing in to my heat. Oh God. I am going to explode! This is pure torture! He grinds his hips in to mine to show me just how greatly I affect him. "You do this to me, Caro. Only you do this to me." He whispers in to my ear, then gently sucks on my earlobe.
I gasp loudly as a whole new sensation shoots from my ear straight down to my core. Holy shit! This has never happened before with any one! Maybe he's right, maybe he is the one for me. Who would've thought that I would be matched up with Mike Logan? I tremble under his touch. "Oh God, Mike. Please...please take me. I'm yours, Mike, yours. Now make me yours." I whisper seductively to him.
He growls loudly and rips my pants and underwear off of me in one fell swoop. I try to push his pants off of him as quickly as I can. I need him now. I can't wait any longer, I need to feel him inside me. I simply need him to complete me. I just know that he's the one for me. He pushes me further up on the bed and then positions himself over me. I whimper to him, begging him to enter me. When he thrusts in me, I cry out in shock at his size. He feels so fucking good. Oh God, he does stretch me so well. He's the perfect fit for me, he's the one for me. He pauses and lets me adjust to his size before he starts moving again. I thrust my hips towards him, encouraging him to start again. He sets a slow rhythm at first, savoring every movement he makes. I hear him curse to himself at how I respond to him. Never before have I ever been this aroused by a man. Mike Logan is a fantastic lover!
"Oh God Caro...you feel so fucking great. I love how wet you get for me. Is that always how you respond to men?" He asks, grunting occasionally from effort to hold back.
I moan softly, finding that I grow more aroused at him being jealous, with that piercing possessive look in his eyes. "No, Mike. Only with you. Only you." I admit quietly to him. I see his eyes take on a more primal gaze at my answer to his question. In a flash I feel his lips on mine, nipping and sucking on them. I crash when a wave of pleasure washes over me.
"Good. I love you Caro. Always have, and will for as long as you'll have me." His voice low, with a velvet tone. I become weak in the legs as he speaks.
"Forever Mike. That's how long I want you. I love you too." I struggle to get out, tears are threatening to break loose.
Once again, he kisses away my tears. "Shh sweetheart. Just let go for me...come for me sweetheart." His voice hypnotizing me in to obeying him.
I cry out his name loudly as my body is in the throws of passion. I convulse in pleasure, writhing beneath his body. His lips suck at my neck, gently nibbling and leaving its mark on me. I feel him start to buck against me and I know that he is at his own brink of an orgasm. His strangled cry of my name ringing in the room as he spills himself inside of me, filling me to the brim with his seed. We both lay still for a moment trying to regain ourselves. Neither of us is going to move unless it's necessary. I close my eyes for a moment but then find myself drifting off to sleep. Mike also surrenders to rest along with me. We awake together a few hours later, his arms are encircled around me. I blush when he reaches down to kiss me.
"Did you mean what you said, Mike? Please, be honest with me." I look in to his eyes, pleading for the truth.
His hand cups my face, caressing my cheeks. "Of course Caro. I meant every single word. I love you, and I would be thrilled if you would be the mother to our children."
By this point tears are flowing out of my eyes. All my emotions are rising to the surface and I can't stop the outbreak of tears. "Oh God. I love you too, Mike. I would be honored to be the mother of your children." I reach up to him, kissing him full on. Our lips part, opening to deepen the kiss as it becomes more sensual in nature. I can't believe this is happening! Never in a million years did I think I would be laying here with the man of my dreams, in his arms.
"So...what we just did? Are you on any kind of protection?" He asks, his stare penetrating me. His eyes echo his wishes for my answer to be 'no'.
I smile up at him, shaking my head. "I never bothered to be on the pill since I didn't have a personal life. So we can definitely get a head start on making up for lost time." My answer seems to make him ecstatic. He pulls me in to him, squeezing me tightly. He places feather kisses all over as he seduces me in to making love again and again. When I woke up this morning, I had no idea my day would end like this! Mike Logan is one amazing man. I definitely feel as if my half of the soul has found its mate, and now we are sown together in love and we will never part. I feel at home in his arms, and rest peacefully for the first time in my life.
"I, for one, can't wait to see where this goes. I need you by my side, Caro. I can't live with out you." His voice holds an excited quality to it.
I let out a low laugh. "Well, you'll never have to find out. I can't wait for us to have a family, I know you'll be a great father." I mean every word I say to him. I imagine he will be a great father, because I know he'll strive to not be like his own father than ran out on him. We fall asleep again in each others arms, dreaming of what the future holds for us. I know that our making love tonight is special, and I know that something will come to grow out of it. I am actually looking forward to it.
End Chapter 1!
A/N: Was it good? Bad? In between? Lemme know, drop a review to me! :D hopefully y'all enjoyed it, and I shall post next chapter shortly!
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