Just a little something that I just had to do after reading the amazing author, Unsharpened's list on her own profile. A lot of these are based on hers but for the most part they're mine =] Enjoy!
100 Things I am not allowed to do at Hogwarts:
1) Seamus Finnigan is not after me lucky charms
2) I will not sing "we're off to see the wizard" when sent to the Headmaster's office.
3) I will not bring a Magic Eight Ball to Divination class
4) I will not diagnose Voldemort with cancer because of his unnaturally bald state
5) I will not ask Professor Flitwick if his first name is Yoda
6) I will not send Lupin a flea collar for his birthday
7) I will not feed first years to Fluffy
8) I will not make any jokes about Lupin and his "time of the month"
9) I will not give Hagrid Pokemon cards and convince him they're real animals
10) I will not sing the Badger Song during Hufflepuff-Slytherin quidditch matches
12) When Death-Eaters are attacking Hogsmeade, I shall not point at the Dark Mark and shout "To the Bat Moblie, Robin!"
13) When a class-mate falls asleep, I shall not take advantage of the fact and draw a Dark Mark on his arm.
14) I will not burst out singing Werewolves of London every time I see Lupin
15) I will not throw a boggart in front of Hermione just to see the look on her face when she sees a failed exam
16) I will not look at Dumbledore and gasp "Professor! You have a white hair!"
17) I will not hex Slytherins into oblivion every chance I get
18) I will not pick up where the Marauders left off and begin to call McGonagall "Minnie"
19) Its not necessary for me to yell "Bam!" everytime I apparate.
20) I will not attempt to poke Moody's fake eye simply because it's that tempting
21) I will not tease Moaning Mertle about her obsession with Harry....or his chest....
22) I will not make lightsaber sounds with my wand.
23) I am not allowed to paint the house elves blue and call them smurfs.
24) I will not slip Lupin a Love Potion in his morning goblet of Pumpkin Juice.
25) I will not say the phrase "Dude, get a life" to Voldemort.
26) Should I chance to see a Death Eater wearing a white mask, I will not start singing anything from The Phantom of the Opera.
27) I will not refer to the Accio charm as "the Force".
28) I will not call Dumbledore "Santa Claus!" during the Christmas Holidays.
29) I will not put Muggle fairy book in the History section at the library.
30) I will not send Snape a bottle of shampoo for Christmas.
31.)I will not use Umbridge's quill to write, "I told you I was hardcore".
32.) I will not take Dobby for a night out at the bar just to see him drunk out of his little elf mind
33.) I will not start a betting pool on the fate of this year's Defense Against Dark Arts teacher.
34.)I am not allowed to tell Hufflepuffs there is no Santa Clause.
35.) I am not allowed to refer to myself as the a Jizard, combination of a Jedi and a Wizard.
36.) I am not allowed to create a mass petition of the entire school(professors included) to get Lupin back as the Defense teacher, seeing as he doesn't have Voldemort strapped to the back of his head, he isn't a complete nutjob, he isn't an imposter, he isn't a toad faced ministry loving piece of pure evil, a grease haired git, or relatively near insane.
37.) I am not allowed to steal Professor Flitwicks wand, hold it over my head and laugh as he tries to reach it.
38.)I will not replace Madam Pomfrey's Skele-Gro with pumpkin juice.
39.) I will not replace Professor Snape's pumpkin juice with Skele-Gro.
40.) I will not impersonate the Swedish Chef in Potions class.
41.) I will not tell Rita Skeeter that Gilderoy Lockhart is waiting for her for a date at the Three Broomsticks
42.)I will not feed first years to Aragog either
43.)When applying for a post at the Ministry of Magic after graduation, I should not cite "The Marauders " as my greatest influence at Hogwarts.
44.) Putting down "Fred and George Weasley" probably isn't the best idea either...
45.) A Muggle "vacuum cleaner" is not acceptable Quidditch equipment, even if it has been enchanted to fly.
46.) Nor am I allowed to feed the little scum first years to Lupin during full moon...
47.)I will not tell Professor Trelawney that I prophesied her death.
48.). I will also not tell Professor Trelawney that I had a vision of her killing the Dark Lord.
49.) I will not ask McGonagall if she has a thing for Dumbledore, as strongly as I believe she does.
50.) I will not use the Room of Requirement as a party hall to annoy the magic out of Umbridge
51.)I will not call the Ghostbusters as a cruel joke to play on the resident ghosts and poltergeists.
52.)I will not have a private army of Jizards.
53.) I will not substitute chocolate-flavored laxative for Professor Lupin's prescription-strength chocolate.
54.)Nor am I to in any way substitute, alter, hide, or otherwise tamper with Professor Dumbledore's candy.
55.)I am not the wicked witch of the west.
56.) -I will not refer to Professor Umbridge as such either.
57.) I will not melt if water is poured over me.
58.) -Neither will Professor Umbridge.
59.)I shouldn't use Photoshop to create incriminating photos of my house prefects or tutors.
60.)I will not enchant the Golden Snitch to fly up the nearest fan's nose.
61.) I do not know the Avada Kedavra curse, and pretending I do to people who annoy me is not funny, no matter how much they injure themselves diving for cover.
62.) I will not test my Potions assigments by spiking Snape's drink with them.
63.) - Especially not all of them at once.
64.) I will not try to sell Gilderoy Lockhart's used tissues to his shallow little fangirls
65.) I will not claim my X-Files tapes are "Auror Training Videos."
66.)I will not shout out that Snape has greasy hair at random in the middle of his class.
67.)I am not able to see the Grim Reaper, nor am I to claim that he is standing by the Headmaster, tapping an hourglass and looking at him impatiently. Or, for that matter, Harry Potter.
68.)When being interrogated by a member of staff, I am not to wave my hand and announce 'These are not the droids you are looking for'.
69.)Thestrals do not resemble the Muggle toys known as 'My Little Pony'.
70.)The four Houses are not the Unrealistic Heroes, the Borons, the Smarts and the Junior Death Eaters.
71.)I am not authorized to negotiate a peace treaty with Voldemort.
72.)Despite my personal beliefs, Quidditch would not improved by the introduction of muggle firearms.
73.)Though they are doubtless more athletic, battle-axes are not acceptable either.
74.)I will not claim that Luna is indeed crazy and in need to be locked up in the cookoo shack
75.)I will not use the Marauder's Map for stalking purposes.
76.)I am not allowed to introduce Peeves to paintballing.
77.) I am not allowed to ask Professor Dumbledore how old he exactly is...or if I can guess his age starting from 250.
78.)I will not hire The Remus Lupins, Harry and the Potters, Draco and the Malfoys, The Whomping Willows or The Moaning Myrtles to play at the Yule Ball
79.) I will not claim that Ms. Norris is demented and then perform an elaborate exorcism on both her and Mr. Filch.
80.) Harry Potter and Ron Weasley are not the magical equivalent of "Batman and Robin".
81.) Nor is Dumbledore the magical equivalent of Gandalf
82.) I will not attempt to assassinate Umbridge with every chance I receive
83.)I will not play the Imperial March theme when Professor Snape walks into class, slamming the door, shutting the blinds, pulling down the over head and demanding "Turn to page three hundred and ninety four."
84.). - However, when Lucius Malfoy visits, I may play it.
85.) I will not turn to Lupin and scream "ZOMG IT'S ALEX CARPENTER!!!!"
86.) I will not attempt to steal Hermione's arithmancy homework
87.)I should not refer to Malfoy, Crabbe and Goyle collectively as "Team Rocket" either.
88.)I will not grab Ron by the collar and growl "Just tell her you love her goddamit!" and then proceed to threaten him into taking Hermione out
89.)I will not walk up to Snape with a cup and put it over my mouth and yell "NO I AM YOUR FATHER"
90.)I will not introduce Cho and Cedric to Bella Swan just to see the biggest catfight in the history of catfights.
91.)I will not charm the Slytherin common room to be gold and burgundy
92.)I will not stand up on the table during the great feast and announce that Dumbledore is gay
93.)I will not charm a poster of Britney Spears on Draco's wall
94.) I will not tell Draco that he has an uncanny resemblance to Eminem
95.)-And then explain to him who Eminem is
96.) I will not persuade Harry, Ron and Hermione to join me in making a potion that will go horribly wrong and send us back to the time of The Marauders so we can change the future
97.) I will not attempt to give Harry laser surgery to remove his scar
98.) I will not dye my hair red and proclaim myself to be a Weasley
99.) I will not turn into an animagus and join the Marauders every full moon to accompany Lupin and become the first ever girl Marauder
100.) I am not under any possible circumstances whatsoever allowed to make a list of 100 things that I am not allowed to do at Hogwarts simply so I can go on and do them.
Lol, so what'd ya think? Be sure to tell me which ones you liked the best! =]
Reviews are appreciated!! =]