Price

One Shot

Rating: T (For language)

Author's Note: The odds of this actually happening? Not so great, but I said I would do this for a fic prompt challenge and as long as I'm writing it, why not post it on ? Anyway it's a wacky story and nothing more. Don't read too much into it, okay? LoL! Also this is a ONE SHOT I will NOT be continuing…still reviews are nice. :-P

Late last night, as some sort of after thought, Robert Chase bought a lottery ticket. He was picking up a bottle of vodka for another lonely night at home and decided to get a mega millions ticket. It was 133 million dollars, and it cost a dollar to play, who knew what the outcome would be? The drawing would be that night and he was on a case with House. Well, House was at home asleep, he was testing blood for the umpteenth time, for something that he didn't think the woman had anyway. He had the radio on and was sort of falling asleep. The music was background to his day dreams about Cameron. Unfortunately, it wasn't a Tuesday so he couldn't tell her how much he loved her, although he wanted to anyway.

"And tonight, the winning lottery numbers are 4, 11, 13, 21, 42, and 7." The female DJ said. Up until then, Chase had forgotten that he had even got a ticket. He had tucked it into his wallet when he bought it and there it had been forgotten, until now. He didn't know what the numbers on it were, but he was almost certain there was a 42 on his ticket. He didn't want to get his hopes up but he decided to look at the ticket anyway to see how far off he was in the drawing.

He took out his wallet and what he saw baffled him. He had to read the numbers twice, but there they were, 4, 11, 13, 21, 42, and 7. "No." He said to no one and then slowly stood up. There was no way his ticket was a matching ticket. No way in hell. Forgetting all about the blood he was supposed to be testing he walked out of the lab, still staring down at the ticket. He walked like a zombie all the way to House's office and sat down at the computer.

He pulled up the national lottery website and scrolled over to the mega millions number. There were his numbers again. 4, 11, 13, 21, 42, and 7. He shook his head, sitting there like his brain was about to explode. He looked at the ticket and then back to the screen, the ticket, screen, ticket, screen. After about ten minutes of doing this, he really thought he was going to faint. He didn't know what to do, should he scream? Should he cry? Should he call someone? Everything was getting fuzzy, especially because he was so tired.

"The hell? How in the…I just…wow." Chase said to no one. Right now he could literally trash House's office and be able to pay for it in the morning. He could poor coffee over the keyboard, he could smash the window behind him, he could throw the phone into the wall. He could do anything he wanted to that office. Thinking quickly, he flipped over the ticket and looked at the hotline to call if you should be the holder of a winning ticket. He picked up the phone and dialed the number. He barely realized at that point that it was six o'clock in the morning, he had been up for almost twenty-four hours.

"Mega Millions, what are your numbers?" A woman's voice said after it picked up.

"Um, 4, 11, 13, 21, 42, and 7." Chase said slowly, saying the numbers out loud made it seem like it was completely surreal. It just confirmed in his brain that he had won the lottery, for whatever reason God had chosen to make him a multimillionaire in under thirty seconds. There was a pause on the other side.

"Congratulations sir, you have a winning ticket. You'll need to bring it down to--" Chase dropped the phone at that point, it just fell out of his hand. He looked at the ticket, he looked at the website, he looked at the phone, he looked back at the ticket. Everything was right, he had just won 133 million dollars.

"EVERYONE CAN SUCK IT!" He yelled for no reason. A passing nurse stopped outside of the office and looked in. He paused and looked at her, smiling slightly as his face went red. She gave him a stare and then went on her way. He was embarrassed, but it was something he could live with at that point. Hell for the amount of money he had just won he would come to work naked. Without hanging up the phone he ran out of the office and booked it to his car. He was going to the lottery office, now, before something happened.

* * *

"I don't fucking believe it." Cuddy said to herself as she was driving into work. She had been listening to the radio when the DJ said that a Robert Chase had been the soul winner of 133 million dollars. She was trying to convince herself that there could be another Robert Chase in the state of New Jersey. Chase wasn't such a bizarre last name, it was very possible. She eased her car into the parking space and turned it off. She sat there staring for a moment, pulled the keys from the ignition, and then got out of the car.

When she got into the office, she was still saying how much she didn't believe this under her breath while shaking her head. The first thing she noticed was that House was sitting in there, behind her desk, looking pissed off. "Good morning House." She said, deciding not to bring up what she had just heard on the radio.

"That stupid little wombat just got up and left this morning. Didn't even finish the tests that I had him rush." House said. Cuddy furrowed her brow, only because for the moment she couldn't figure out who the "wombat" was and why a "wombat" would be running tests in the lab. Then she realized that he was talking about Chase. If Chase had left suddenly in the morning, then maybe he really did win the lottery.

"Well did he tell anyone why he left?" Cuddy asked, thinking that winning the lottery was certainly a damn good reason to rush out of your job without telling anyone anything.

"A nurse told me that he was in my office yelling about how everyone could suck it, before running out of here." House said. Cuddy's jaw dropped and her eyes went wide. Chase had won the lottery, what were the odds? A 100 million to one? 500 million to one? A billion to one? She shook her head. "What is that look all about?"

"He won the lottery." Cuddy said softly.

"What? Don't be stupid." House said. She came over to her desk and pushed the rolling chair out of her way with House in it. She picked up her phone, ignoring the fact that House had just implied she was stupid, and dialed Chase's cell. She put it to her ear and let it ring. "What gives you the bright idea that Chase has magically won the lottery?"

"I heard it on the radio. I didn't think it was him but…hello? Chase?" She said. She could barely hear anything Chase was saying there was very loud music playing in the background. To be specific it was the song "We Are The Champions" by Queen. "Can you turn the music down?" She shouted into the phone. A moment later the music was turned to a way more tolerable level, but she could still hear it in the background. Cuddy reached over to her phone, pressed the speaker button, and hung the phone up, so now House could hear Chase and her.

"Did you win the lottery?" She asked, dumfounded.

"Fuck yeah I won the lottery!" Chase shouted into the phone. "Party, Christi's all day…everything on me!" Then he hung up. Cuddy didn't hear anything about him wanting to quit his job so she assumed that would be worked out later. Then she thought about Christi's…she had never heard of that place before.

"He won the lottery and he throws a party at a strip club?" House asked, "I'm so there."

"You are so NOT there. You have to work." Cuddy replied before picking up House's cane and handing it to him.

"Sick day. I'm calling in horny." House replied. He grabbed the cane and stood up. Cuddy knew that she wasn't going to get anywhere with him after this. All House had to hear was that alcohol was free at a strip club and his mind was far gone. She supposed it was better anyway. Cameron and Foreman could take care of the case while House was gone, and who knew he might have one of his trademark epiphanies while watching some girl shake her ass around. She pulled her chair up to the desk and sat down with a sigh.

* * *

When work was over, she decided that she would head over to Christi's and share in some of Chase's good fortune. She had never been to a strip club, which was surprising to her only because she knew House and was sure he would have called on her, drunk out of his mind, to pick him up some night. She didn't have an opinion one way or the other about the places, if that's how someone wanted to make their money, fine. Who was she to say that nudity was wrong? She supposed that she didn't want to see a bunch of fake tits and pole dancing but, hey, it was free drinks and she could use one after the day she had. Cameron had called in sick, even though Cuddy knew she just had to be with Chase. Foreman also called in sick, but she couldn't deduce whether he was going to be with Chase or not. This left her with the burden of trying to explain to the sick woman's husband where all the doctors were. He was not a happy camper.

As she entered the club, she realized how dark it was in there. There were a lot of black lights lighting the place and of course the stage was lit. There was a red headed woman dancing up there at that moment, all she was wearing was a g-string. There were also a lot of people there, crowded around the table that Chase, Cameron, and House were sitting at. No Foreman though, he must've really been sick. It seemed like every person Chase had ever known was hanging around him now. Cuddy didn't like fair weather friends, when they were hers or not. She pushed her way through the sea of people only to find that there was an empty chair there.

"Cuddly, how nice of you to join us." Chase slurred and then picked up his glass of champagne. Cuddy got one look at the bottle and realized he was drinking Crystal…he really was sparing no expense at this victory party.

"Yeah Cuddly!" House said, he appeared to be a lot less drunk but of course he was going to make fun of Chase any chance he got. This new name that Chase had invented got him laughing. She sat down in the chair and tried not to stare at the half naked woman on the stage.

"So I guess you all called in horny. Even Cameron." Cuddy said. Chase lifted his hand and snapped his fingers. A moment later an empty champagne flute was brought over by a scantly clad waitress and set down on the table.

"Another bottle sweetie." Chase said and then slipped a twenty into the waitress's cleavage. She giggled and walked away. Chase poured out what was left in the bottle of Crystal, and Cuddy picked up her glass and took a sip. She couldn't believe that this was where everyone had been all day, just partying and celebrating like the world had stopped with Chase's good fortune.

"Hey he wanted me here, and what could I say?" Cameron asked and then laughed. She was sitting right next to Chase, and had her hand on his. Over her wrist she had a diamond bracelet that had to have been worth seven or eight grand. It was brand new. Was Chase actually trying to buy Cameron? She hoped that wasn't the only reason she couldn't say no to him. The waitress set down another bottle of champagne and walked away. Another woman pushed her way through the crowd and put her hand on Chase's shoulder.

"Yo Chase, get her a lap dance!" House instigated.

"You want a lap dance Cuddly?" Chase said and then laughed loudly. Cameron started to giggle and House just thought this was the funniest thing in the world. They really were having the time of their lives.

"I don't think…"

"Oh come on, I had one, it's fun." Cameron said, egging them on even more. Cuddy looked at all of them. Did she really want to be a downer at this party? She picked up her glass and downed the whole thing. She guessed she could handle a lap dance, if she was a little more drunk.

"Let me have another drink." Cuddy said.

"I hear that!" House said and then finished the rest of his drink. Chase picked up the bottle of Crystal and popped the cork. At the noise, his fair weather friends cheered…although none of them were privy to the expensive drink. Didn't matter much, though, they all seemed to have the drinks that they wanted anyway. Cuddy smiled at Chase as he poured her another glass. If she could just let go, and be spontaneous, she would have a good time.

* * *

After four glasses of champagne she was some how talked into a lap dance. The girl's name was Minerva and she was absolutely gorgeous. She had long blond hair and icy blue eyes. She wasn't stick skinny, but Cuddy had never found that attractive in a woman anyway. Her breasts were full and firm, if they were fake there was no way Cuddy could tell. She started out the song by stripping off her blue lycra dress. She got up really close to Cuddy, rubbing her breasts over her face. If she would have had one less glass of alcohol she probably wouldn't have let this happen, but Chase was having fun, House was cheering, and Cameron was…well she was playing with her new bracelet. Minerva tossed her hair over her shoulders and ran it across Cuddy's face and down over her body.

Cuddy could now understand why men went to the strip clubs. Not that this was doing anything for her, but with the close contact the girl was making she understood how someone would get off on it. Minerva smelled amazing, like apples. She also didn't know if this was normal or not, but she kept getting the urge to touch the girl, even though she was sure she would get soundly reprimanded if she did. Minerva turned and bent over, grabbing her ankles in a show of flexibility. She reached around and slapped her ass. House cheered. Cuddy had never had a girl's ass so close to her face, ever. A waitress brought over four full shot glasses and set them down on the table. About that time, the song ended and Minerva left, fifty dollars richer.

"Are all dances fifty dollars?" Cuddy asked, pulling her chair back up to the table. Cameron had already done her shot, and so had House. Chase picked up his and downed it quickly. The three of them looked at her like they were expecting her to do her shot. She hadn't done a shot in a while, that didn't mean she didn't know how to do a shot she just thought it was stupid.

"No, I just couldn't break a fifty." Chase replied. Cuddy shrugged, picked up her shot glass, and downed the vodka inside of it. The other three cheered, and she knew that she was going to feel all this alcohol the next morning. Fortunately, the next morning was Saturday, and she wouldn't have to worry about getting up for work.

"Cuddy that had to be the hottest thing…"

"Shut up."

"…I've ever…"

"Shut up House."

"Seen you do." House finished. She could tell that he had crossed over into drunkenness with that vodka shot. She also could tell that she needed to stop drinking now if she wanted to be able to drive home that night. She smiled at all of them.

"Chase where's the bathroom?" Cuddy asked, having to be loud over the music.

"Over there." Chase replied, pointing to a hallway that was lit up with a neon sign that said "Women's" with an arrow under it. She nodded and got up. She would be glad to get into the bathroom where it would be properly lit and the music would be dulled somewhat.

She entered the bathroom and looked around. There was an area that was like a lounge where there were two comfortable looking chairs set out and there were two doors. One was labeled as the woman's room and the other said "dressing room". She assumed that was where the girls went when they weren't dancing on the stage or otherwise. She sat down and took the moment to compose herself. She didn't know how much longer she wanted to stay at the club with Chase and House as drunk as they were. Would they talk her into another lap dance? Then what? She did not want another lap dance, the one she had made her uncomfortable anyway.

The door opened slowly and Chase poked his head in. "Chase you can't be in here!" Cuddy whispered loudly.

"With the amount of money I'm spending here tonight, I can be anywhere." He replied in a drunken slur. Cuddy sighed, she supposed he was right and in any case this was just like a little lounge area it wasn't like he was in the actual women's bathroom.

"What do you want?" She asked him.

"How much do you want to show me your tits?" He asked her. She was absolutely flabbergasted by this statement. Was he really offering to pay her to take her top off?

"Have another drink Chase." She replied, folding her arms over her chest.

"No I'm serious. Name your price." Chase said, coming into the room completely. Cuddy was not liking where this conversation was going. She could name some outlandish price and hope that Chase would just go away, but what if she said something and he actually offered to pay her that amount? Then the thought occurred to her that House had put him up to this.

"Was this House's idea?" She asked.

"Nope all me." Chase answered, stumbling forward, "Name your price."

"You are on thin ice with me Chase." Cuddy said, standing up. She started to head for the door when he got in front of her, effectively blocking her path. She glared at him, at that point there was no amount of money he could offer her for such a deed.

"There are like 20 strippers here, and you want to see my breasts?" She asked, motioning around her as if all of the strippers would pile into the room at once and show themselves. She had seen the way he stuck the fifty dollar bill into the waitresses cleavage when she brought over the empty glass. Apparently Chase thought that now that he was rich he could buy anything he wanted. This ended right now, right here. "Get out of my way."

"Name…your…price." Chase said, still not moving out of the way.

"A million dollars." She snapped at him, wanting to get the hell out of there as quickly as possible. She knew that Chase couldn't have possibly cashed in his lottery ticket yet, and if he had, there was no way he had the cash on him so she added, "Cash."

"I don't have a million in cash." He replied.

"Then no breasts." Cuddy said with a sarcastic smirk. She went to shove him out of the way, when he grabbed her by the shoulders and pulled her into a kiss. Her brain was screaming that House was somehow involved in all of this. It was possible that Chase was just really drunk, but there had to be some instigating to get him to this point. She almost kissed back, as a reflex, not to mention that Chase was actually a very attractive man. After another moment she pulled back and slapped him across the face. "Go fuck Cameron, and if you try that again you're fired."

"ROWR!" Chase said, not even phased by the slap to the face.

"Goodbye Chase. Congratulations." She spat at him and then stormed out of the bathroom and out of the club without saying goodbye to any of her friends. She was absolutely seething at that point, but she had to chalk it up to the alcohol, the new found money, and House. Once she was outside, the sun had completely set. Chase had offered her any amount of money in exchange to see her breasts, but there was no way he could put a price on her dignity.