Author's Note: …and she's back! Wow. I realize I suck at updating my old stories and that they really need to be updated and I promise you they will be updated. Soon, even. I can't give a specific date but oh well. This story was really difficult for me to write and I don't know why I'm going through with it but it… just seems to work. And it keeps me wanting to write so, there you go.

Summary: She has her life together, a great job, a loving fiancée, a smart kid and the best friends' anyone could ask for. Until one day, when an accident takes the life of someone she loves deeply, altering her path in life forever.

Disclaimer: While the idea is mine, I do not own the wonderful characters in this story. While at times I may add my own character (you'll know when) I take no credit for them or their world.

Here Without You

Chapter 1

The church smelled of flowers: orchids, roses, daises, and many more. It smelled sweet and lovely, usually a smell associated with happiness, and smiles but the atmosphere could not have been more different. Tears filled more than half of the mourner's eyes, handkerchiefs were being pulled out of pockets and handed to their neighbors, tissues being consumed more and more by the minute.

The whole town was gathered in the tiny church, paying their respects to the one person they looked forward to seeing everyday, the one person they could count on when they needed anything at all. It was a sad day in Stars Hollow, a day that no one would forget anytime soon, especially Lorelai Gilmore. The day they laid their beloved Lucas Danes to rest.

-

She sobbed throughout the entire ceremony, not caring how loud she was being; no one really cared seeing as she wasn't the only one. Clutching a tissue, she leaned against her father, surprising more than one person.

He gladly put a firm arm around his only daughter, holding her tight and held back tears, himself, that fought against him to fall as he listened the words being spoken by the Minister. He hated to see his daughter in pain, and always did. He was a strong man, didn't show his emotions easily but it was hard not to right then and there. He had gotten to know the man that won his daughter's heart, talked with him seriously, putting the incident and the club behind them and started new. Luke earned Richard's respect, unlike most of the men that had been in Lorelai's life. He asked permission to ask for his daughter's hand in marriage, and to Richard that made Luke a brave and noble man, willing to go through anything for the woman he loved.

-

Lorelai fought off another wave of tears as the Ceremony came to a close. She looked over to her daughter who sat in the pew behind her, resting against Logan, her boyfriend. She watched as Rory gave her a sympathetic look and gulped taking the tissue that Logan was reserving for her. Lorelai turned back to the front and sat up straight, just watching.

The concept was so hard to grasp. He wasn't going to be there to help her through all the bad times anymore and he wasn't going to be there to share the good times with. He really wasn't coming back and she had to go through the rest of her life without him, the constant he was supposed to be in her life. Sure there were other people there for her, willing to do anything to make it easier, but in reality nothing could make it easier. Nothing could make the fact that the one person she opened up to in a whole, the one person she trusted her entire life with, was really gone.

Before she knew it, the tears consumed her again and she couldn't stop them. They forced their way out just as someone lead her up out of her seat and down the short isle. The ceremony was over and she could barely recall anything being said, but she knew it was in there somewhere and would come out when it was ready.

-

It was a cold, windy day. Tree branches blew, the air smelled of fall and rain threatened the area. It would hold though, she knew it would.

She sat down on the folding chair in front of the brown casket she picked out with Liz especially for Luke. Liz sat next to her and they leaned on each other while the second half of the funeral took place. Prayers were said, making sure he got to the afterlife, wherever that may be, safely, roses were thrown on top of the gravesite, and it was over. He was in the ground to eternally rest with his father, mother, and Uncle Louie.

A sad smile was shared with Liz as they hugged like they never hugged before. Lorelai and Liz had become close within the year which Lorelai dated her brother. Lorelai found herself attending Renaissance Fairs' with them and playing the part well.

The happy memory brought tears to her eyes as she rode back to the house in a black Limo. Her, Liz, Jess, and TJ. The most mismatched group of people officially all had one thing in common. The loss of someone they cared about greatly.

-

The Wake was to be held at the diner. In a tribute to Luke. Everyone in town crowded into the small diner eating their way through Sookie's food. Soups, breads, vegetables, everything ever imaginable was served.

Lorelai stood outside the diner, looking in. She couldn't face it, she couldn't take all the people staring at her anymore, asking her questions she didn't know the answers to. What's going to happen to the diner? being the most popular at the moment.

She looked down at the ring on her finger, the ring he gave to her on the starlit night in August while they were at the beach, taking a break from the world, drinking their cares away.

-----

"It's so beautiful here," Lorelai stated from her position in Luke's arms as they gazed up at the stars from the balcony in which they sat.

A bottle of wine sat open beside them, more than half-gone, and two plastic cups next to it. Wind blew freely, tickling her face, the scent of salt in the air as the waves danced across the shoreline, making a sea gull jump up in surprise. She smiled contently as she just watched, feeling the hot breath on her face of the man she loved.

"I love you…" she whispered to him gently, as he started kissing his way along her neck, sending shivers up her spine. They'd been together for a little over a year and this was his present to her, an escape to the beach for the week.

"I love you, too…" he whispered back, suddenly shifting positions causing her to pout.

"I was comf-" she started to say when she saw what Luke just pulled out of his pocket. She whispered his name as he slid out from under her and sat in front of her.

"I love you, and I know I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I knew I loved you from the first time I saw you, only then it was disguised as annoyance and anger…" he said making her giggle at the memory. "We've been together for a year… wait, scratch that. More like nine years and the love just keeps on growing. So… Uh…" he stuttered looking nervous all of a sudden, the old Luke showing through. She smiled encouragingly making him smile. "Will you marry me?" he whispered in the background of the waves.

She jumped on him, sending him the floor and smiled. Looking into his eyes she nodded and whispered 'Yeah…'

-

"Lorelai, sweetie?" she heard, sending her crashing back to reality. She wanted to stay in the memory, watching how he jumped up with joy and slid the small but antique ring on her finger that once belonged to his mother. She looked over to Sookie who was looking at her with sad eyes.

"Come on, honey, come inside, it's freezing out here." She heard Sookie speak but it was a thousand miles away.

A chilly wind chose that time to sweep by, sending shivers down her spine. Lorelai wrapped her beige coat around her body tightly and she shook with cold, making Sookie grasp her arm and lead her inside.

It was warm inside, sending a burning feeling throughout her body. She felt numb with cold and sadness along with the hot burning as if she were on fire. Sookie took her coat and threw it on a nearby chair. Lorelai found an empty seat at a booth with Liz, TJ, and Jess and sat down, not paying any particular attention to the faces. When Sookie came back with a cup of coffee, she looked up at her.

"Sookie…" she choked out, tears falling, "I'm…" her voice faltered as Sookie sat next to her and embraced her tightly.

Gently she whispered, "I know, honey, I know."