Summery: Hermione is put on a pedestal one too many times and subconsciously decides that it is time for a change. She wakes up a few days later with an alternate personality who goes by Kyle and is the opposite of Hermione in every way.

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or anything affiliated with the series. The idea for Hermione's Multiple Personality Disorder came from the show United States of Tara, which I also don't own. This story was inspired by the song She's a Rebel by Green Day.

"She's a rebel
She's a saint
She's salt of the earth
And she's dangerous.
She's a rebel
Vigilante
Missing link on the brink
Of destruction."

~ Green Day

"Son of a bitch!"

Lavender Brown hurled her Transfiguration book across the dorm that she shared with her best friend, Parvati Patil, and the ever bookish, frizzy-haired Head Girl, Hermione Granger.

"What's the problem now, Lav?" Hermione asked, looking up from Dazzling Spells for Advanced Witches and Wizards only for a moment and then settling back against her pillow.

"I cocked up another fucking spell!" she hissed viciously as she whipped out her wand to summon the book back to her perch on the headboard of her bed. "Will you show it to me again, Mymy? Yours are always perfect."

"Yeah, sure," Hermione mumbled as she placed her bookmark gingerly into the crease of the book. She withdrew her wand from her bedside table drawer and tapped the book that Lavender was attempting to convert into a thermometer three times.

"Postulo Estus," she said, clearly and correctly.

"Shit, Hermione, you are so goddamned perfect," Lavender said with a little more malice than gratitude.

Hermione rolled her eyes, not at her roommate's lack of retention, but at the fact that she was once again referred to as "perfect".

"I'm not fucking perfect!" she shouted so abruptly that it caused Lavender to teeter off of her backboard and into her unmade bed. Raising her wand to point it at Lavender's neck she hissed again, "I'm not fucking perfect!"

"He...Hermione, please put your wand down." Lavender cowered, staring at the tip of her friend's wand in terror.

"Who the fuck are you?" Hermione asked suddenly, allowing her arm to drop to her hip.

"Wha…what?" Lavender asked, still shocked that her bookish roommate would threaten her so viciously. "Hermione, it's me, Lavender. We've been roommates for six years."

"I don't know what the hell you're going on about, but would you stop calling me that ghastly name? Hermione's gone, off to study in the recesses of my mind I expect. I'm Kyle von Stefan, and if you ever call me that hideous name again I'll break every tooth in that pretty little head of yours, understand?"

Lavender nodded nervously.

Kyle clicked her tongue as she turned on her heel and headed for the bathroom. She laughed when she saw her reflection. She wasn't wearing a trace of makeup, her hair looked as if she had just stuck a fork into an electrical socket, and her clothes were all at least two sizes too big, but that could be fixed easily and then any hint that Hermione had ever existed would be gone.

With a flick of her wand Kyle had replaced the rugged no-mans-land that had previously occupied her head with smooth hair which she tossed up in a loose bun in a matter of seconds. Next she reached into Lavender's makeup bag that was sitting on the counter and applied liberal amounts of inky black eyeliner and mascara.

Stepping back to admire her handiwork, Kyle grinned devilishly. The face that once belonged to Hermione had never looked better.

"Reducto," she muttered, touching the hem of her skirt lightly. She watched her hemline rise up her leg until it rested scandalously high, three-quarters of the way up her thigh. She repeated the process with her shirt, fitting it snuggly to her lithe torso.

Lavender gasped when Kyle emerged from the lavatory, a new person.

"I'll take that as a compliment," Kyle smirked in a very Slytherin sort of way. "By the way, Lav, I've decided that I can't stand your name either. I like Azrael better; play around with it." With that she snatched a pair of Parvati's Doc Martins, slipped them on, and left.

A/N: I hope you're enjoying this so far. Feel free to review if you have a request for something crazy that you like to see Kyle do.