Awaking suddenly, a small black cat turned his face skyward, squinting through the darkness of his barn. Feeling compelled, he got to his paws and stretched, rustling the hay beneath him and his sleeping companion.
The plump, black and white cat beside him yawned and rolled over in his sleep, clearly dreaming well in the warm air. Ravenpaw would normally grin at Barley's heavy sleep, but something inside of him was churning uncomfortably.
He began to climb to the second level of the barn, where moon light shone through the open roof. Each step creaked with his weary bones, and he was suddenly envious of his peaceful friend, wondering why he, too, couldn't sleep so well.
Whatever had woken Ravenpaw from his slumber lead him silently towards the stream of moon light. He sat, curling his tail neatly around his paws, and peering into the night sky.
Silverpelt glowed aboved him. Was that Silverpelt? The question had wandered his mind ever since the clans had left, moons ago. Or had his ancestors left with his friends?
Ravenpaw gave his head a light shake. Why must he clutter his thoughts like that, when there was such a beautiful night to be seen? The moon was awfully bright, and the stars almost seemed to dance. An incredibly bright star caught his eye, and he watched it as his mind wandered again.
He wondered how his friends were. He never knew if they even made it to their new home. But something inside of him assured him they were there, safe, under the watchful gaze of Starclan. Only now did his insides clench at the thought of his two good friends. One, in particular…
The star twinkled furiously. Firestar.. Ravenpaw flicked his ears back. That was what had woken him. This terrible feeling in his gut- no, his heart.
He heard as the hay rustled behind him, turning to see Barley approach him slowly.
"Stars too loud for you?" He wondered, sitting beside Ravenpaw a little heavily. His companion had been getting on, even more so than Ravenpaw, and his bones made it clear.
"I think something happened to Firestar." He admitted quietly, his breath catching in his throat. How silly of him.. how would he know? The clans were so far away now… there was no way he would be able to know unless he went to find them.
"Who? Firestar?" Barley tilted his head closer, making Ravenpaw smile a little.
"Yes, Firestar. My old friend." The smile faded and Ravenpaw turned back to the stars. "I think he might be…" He trailed off, and a silence enveloped the pair.
Ravenpaw broke it, shaking his head slowly. "No, how silly of me. I really am starting to sound like an elder! Firestar is probably fine… I'm sure he is." Barley didn't respond, leaning gently on Ravenpaw's shoulder.
"Firestar was one of my best friends… one of my only friends. He and Graystripe… if it weren't for them, I'd be dead." Ravenpaw continued, unsure if Barley's frail hearing could even understand him. "They never doubted me for a second… I always imagined it would be us, growing older together, all three of us." He stiffened, realizing what this could entail.
"I mean… I'm just as happy here." He turned to his friend, looking at the gray around his muzzle. Barley's eyes were half-lidded and he made a small noise. Ravenpaw was unsure what it meant, but he continued now, a bit fervently. "B-Barley, you've… I owe you just as much, you know. You're… you're my best friend. You're the only one I have left. I never want to lose you." He admitted, looking away while Barley shifted a bit on his shoulder.
"Now, now… you'll never lose me. I'll always be here for you. I love you." Barley rasped, his voice so soft Ravenpaw doubted he could hear himself. He swallowed the lump the size of a rabbit in his throat, turning back and brushing his cheek against Barley.
"I love you too, old friend." He whispered. Barley was still, having fallen asleep on his shoulder. "Heh… you old badger, you." Ravenpaw murmured, turning back to the stars for a moment longer. "I hope you're safe, wherever you are, Firestar." Ravenpaw finally drew his eyes from the glimmering sky and nudged Barley gently. "Come on now, you'll wake up stiff if you sleep like this." Barley refused to move. "Barley, don't act like a kit." Ravenpaw got to his paws, but Barley still slept.
"Fine." Ravenpaw slipped away from his plump companion, and he slumped to the floor with a soft wheeze. "Hehe." Ravenpaw giggled softly. "If you act like a kit, I'll treat you like one!" His tail raised slowly, expectantly. Barley didn't rise, not even his chest. A chilling numbness started at Ravenpaw's paws and continued through his legs.
"Barley.." He struggled to step forward, each paw feeling like the weight of the Great Rock. "This.. isn't funny." Ravenpaw heard the note of panic in his own voice. "C-Come on. We need to go back to bed." He finally reached his friend, and nose his neck gently. The warmth was rapidly seeping out of him. "N-No." His voice dropped to a horrified whisper. "Barley… you… you just said… how could you…"
Ravenpaw slowly stepped over Barley, nudging his head. "You promised…" He felt his legs begin to shake, as though they couldn't hold up his own weight. "You promised you would... be here with me…" His mouth continued to move, but no more words would come to him.
Slowly, slowly. Ravenpaw felt his legs give out. He slumped beside his black and white companion.
If only… he would take his own warmth… he could stay.
"Please." Ravenpaw whispered urgently, voice trembling. "Please!"
When he got no response, Ravenpaw slowly tucked his head into Barley's aged fur, each breath a shaking, crumbling mess.
Slowly, the numbness faded from his legs. Each tingling sensations wept from his toes, until the last drop slid from his claw with a gentle twitch of his paw.
The starlight grew stronger, and Ravenpaw peered over Barley's unmoving back.
A shape emerged, taking the form of a lithe cat, with paws caked in stars. Ravenpaw recognized her immediately, but he had no energy to speak.
"Ravenpaw. I've always kept my eye on you. You've grown into a fine warrior, if not one of the clans." Bluestar murmured. She looked as she did when Ravenpaw remembered her, from kithood, strong, impenetrable, unbreakable.
Ravenpaw blinked at his old leader, his eyes watering at the brightness her appearance cast.
"I've just come for my old friend." She admitted. "He will be waiting for you, once your time comes." She admitted, and flicked her tail.
Barley rose up from beneath Ravenpaw's chin, yet his body remained still. Ravenpaw watched in silent awe as his companion appeared as he did many moons ago, thick and sturdy, not a single gray whisker to be found.
Barley pulled himself from his lifeless form like a kit squirming from its mother, and leapt- when was the last time Ravenpaw had seen Barley leap?- towards Bluestar, shaking his fur out.
"It's good to see you again, Bluestar." He dipped his head. Starlight began to unfurl from Bluestar's paws, swimming about Barley. He watched it, eyes wide. "You know, I never did believe in this Starclan nonsense…"
Bluestar smiled. "Nonetheless, you'll be welcomed to our ranks. Barley, member of Lionclan, and Thunderclan, if not for a short while." Barley beamed, looking proud as ever.
Thoughts swimming, Ravenpaw opened his mouth, but no sound came. He tried again, creating a throaty croak, not unlike that of a frog. Bluestar and Barley still held each other's gaze as Bluestar seemed to welcome him, stars still swarming his sturdy legs.
"W-Wait!" Ravenpaw yowled, tumbling over Barley's body. "Wait!" He shouted again, the word taken out most of his breath. Barley turned to him with indescribable warmth in his gaze.
"I meant what I said, Ravenpaw." He assured him, touching noses to the smaller cat. Ravenpaw's tail fur fluffed as he felt the warmth from his eyes pass through his entire body. Was this what receiving a life was like? Whether it was or not, he wanted it to last forever. His body carried him forward as Barley pulled away, and he nearly tipped over.
Barley helped to right him with a wry smile on his face. "You be good. Take care of the barn while I'm gone." Ravenpaw shook his head, eyes wide.
"No, no. You can't leave. You said you'd be here with me! You promised!" He wailed, unabashed at acting like this in front of his old leader. She couldn't take Barley. She just couldn't!
"I'm tired." Barley admitted. Ravenpaw quieted himself, listening to the loner's rough voice. "I'd like to go somewhere... maybe I won't be so tired." He looked back at Bluestar, who was waiting patiently in the beam of moonlight. Ravenpaw's breath hitched. "I meant what I said." He emphasised, passing his tongue gruffly over Ravenpaw's ear once. "I'll always be here for you. Just… not as close as I used to be."
"I don't want you to go." Ravenpaw whimpered, his voice cracking.
"It's his time. You must let him go." Bluestar's voice was steady, though her eyes were understanding. "You will see him again, Ravenpaw. I promise you that." She flicked her tail. "Come now. We have a long journey ahead of us." Barley got up, and Ravenpaw rushed to push his nose into his neck fur one last time.
"Heheh. Who's acting like a kit now?" He joked. Ravenpaw didn't move or even speak, but could feel Barley's breath hitch as well, as he forced himself to turn around and follow Bluestar.
"Wait! Bluestar!" Ravenpaw called again. Bluestar paused, turning, without a word but ears pricked. Ravenpaw hesitated.
Did he want to know?
"Firestar. Is Firestar…" He trailed off for the second time, unable to say the words. An emotion passed through Bluestar's eyes, but Ravenpaw didn't understand it.
"All will be clear in time, Ravenpaw." She turned and leapt into the starlight without another word, leaving a line of furled and spinning stars in her wake. Barley bunched up his thighs before hesitating and looking back, one ear flicked backwards.
"Take care of yourself, Ravenpaw. And the barn. If I see you've let things go to dirt in this place, well-! You'll get a real earful from me, I can promise you that!" Barley promise, eyes narrowed jokingly. Something struck Ravenpaw in his heart and he let out a gasping breath. Barley's eyes lightened and he flicked his tail one last time. "See you soon."
He bunched up again and flung himself into the starlight, albeit far less gracefully than Bluestar had. Ravenpaw scrambled to look through the barn roof, but his friend had already disappeared into the night sky.
His only friend in the world, was gone.