In An Instant
It
GENRES: Drama, Romance, Humor, Tragedy, Angst, ...pretty much everything. So...gen? Also, SMUT.
SPOILERS FOR IN AN INSTANT
WARNINGS: Sexual content, as in sex, as in young'ens will be scarred if they try and read it and my karmic reservoir can't take that, so please don't. Also, a shit-ton of snark, some homophobic and racist language, and talk of unsafe sex.
PAIRING: JARSON
WORD COUNT: 11346
"What's your complete sexual history? In detail."
Jesse froze, frowned, and turned to look at his boyfriend.
"What?"
Carson was still typing up his paper, looking between the sheet and the screen as though he'd said nothing, let alone something so out of character.
"Is this a dirty talk thing?" Jesse asked, raising a brow. "I'm not much of a voyeur myself-"
"Vocabulary usage," Carson cut him off, turning to kiss him hard. "Good boy. Proper context and everything, too. Even pronounced correctly. I've taught you well."
"Doesn't that mean I deserve more than just a sexless peck?" Jesse asked, and Carson rolled his eyes but leaned close and touched their lips once more, sliding his tongue over Jesse's lips, then into his mouth, one hand moving forward to grope once, smugly, at Jesse's crotch.
"Better?"
"Fuck yes."
"Good. Now, while I finish this paragraph you can start telling me."
"I'm gonna need a lot more persuasion before I start telling you all of my sexual background," Jesse retorted, smirking, but Carson didn't seem remotely concerned.
"I guess if you don't want to have sex, that's fine then. I'm sure masturbation will be enough to carry you through. I certainly don't need sex to get by. I just thought it might be enjoyable."
Jesse paused, watching his boyfriend work nonchalantly to finish his paper.
"Sex…?"
"Come on now, we both know you know that word. There's no way you've forgotten it in a minute."
"You're going to fuck me?"
"Probably. I'm intrigued by it, at least."
Jesse's eyes raked over Carson, long and slow.
"…Can I sing?"
Carson snorted, still typing.
"Only if what you're singing is your entire sexual history. We both know you've screwed around, and I'm too busy to deal with an STD or STI on top of everything else."
"I'm completely clean!"
"I thought you were dirty," Carson replied, raising an eyebrow at the screen, and Jesse licked his lips.
"You're such a tease."
Carson smiled, turning from the computer.
"It's one of the things I'm best at. Now stop stalling. When was your first time?"
"Do we really need to go back that far?" Jesse grumbled, flopping down onto his side on the bed.
"Absolutely."
"This really seems like a trap," Jesse informed his ceiling, listening to the sound of Carson standing and moving over to the bed.
The springs squeaked a bit as he moved onto it, lying beside Jesse quietly.
"I already know you're a ho, Jess. It's fine."
Jesse turned his head to look at Carson, who stared back, a small smirk toying at his lips.
"Go on. I won't tell the pastor."
Jesse groaned loudly, sliding his hand into Carson's.
"Why do you have to do that?"
"Do what?"
"Be all smart and snarky and persuasive."
"Vocabulary," Carson commented, leaning forward and kissing him hard.
Jesse groaned again, and pulled away.
"Manipulative bastard."
"We both know it only turns you on."
Jesse fixed him with a heated stare.
"It really does. Why don't we just skip the talk? We talk too much already babe."
Carson rubbed his thumb up and down over the top of Jesse's hand, blue eyes steady and determined on him, with just a hint of heat pulsating in his own irises. His lips were minutely parted, the lower dipping open subconsciously, and ever so slightly swollen.
So. Damn.
Fuckable.
…Fuckingable?
Jesse didn't care which way it happened, honestly, just damn did it need to. Now.
"We're doing this right," Carson murmured firmly. "I've felt moronic through half of the steps we've taken, right from the beginning. I want to be smart about this. I want it to be good."
Jesse took on an expression of affront.
"It'll be us. It'll be better than good. Do you still doubt my powers as a Sex God or something?"
Carson's eyes glinted as they moved up and down over his boyfriend and his lips quirked, his fingers contracting over Jesse's.
"You do, don't you? Carson!"
Jesse's lips pursed with a horrified pout as he whined, and Carson snickered softly, leaning forward to kiss the expression swiftly away.
"I've done plenty of research, Jesse. Most first times blow, if you'll pardon the pun." Jesse snorted, and Carson threw a knowing smirk his way, eyes touching briefly on the beginnings of a bulge. "…but I also know it's only going to be my first time, not both of ours, and so, yes, I think it will probably be at least decent…for a first time, that is. But if I don't do everything intelligently, as I've always promised myself I would, it won't be enjoyable for me, no matter how well you…perform. So, either you fess up or we'll just stay forever somewhere in the vicinity of third base."
Carson finished with a broad smirk and a wink, and Jesse moaned wantonly.
"Carson…"
"Come on, Jesse. I'm dying to know of all your previous sexual conquests, you know?"
Jesse gave him a look of "Yeah right" and Carson smiled a bit.
"Let's start small, okay? Can you give me a ballpark?"
Jesse narrowed his eyes, but, after a moment's pause, let the number out from between his teeth.
"Around thirty."
Carson's eyes widened minutely, and his adams apple bobbed once.
"You really do get around, don't you?"
"I'm a hot commodity, what can I say?" Jesse retorted, eyes on the ceiling.
Carson straddled him abruptly, kissing him hard again.
"Vocabulary."
Jesse eyed him suspiciously.
"You're giving me more of those than usual."
"Well, you're improving a lot," Carson snapped, then sighed, rolling off his boyfriend.
"Do you need help with any of your work?"
Jesse looked at him for a moment, inwardly torn between his complete fetish for teacher-Carson, and continuing their trap-talk in the hope it may lead to getting screwed on the bed.
But the desk would be hotter.
And teacher-Carson...
"Well, my professor did say I needed to use fewer commas."
Carson's brow rose.
"What did you do?"
"Nothing! Commas are just way sexier than periods. They've got…curves…"
Carson laughed loudly, dispelling the remnants of tension between them.
"Alright, let me see that paper."
"Hey faggy-boy."
"Fantastic new insult. Never heard that one before. Where are you getting all this creativity lately? Mommy's breast?"
Alec, one of the larger assholes in his second period algebra two AP class, sneered in response.
"Check your formspring lately?"
A couple others around Alec shot Carson pointed looks that he more pointedly ignored.
"Or were you too busy sucking your boyfriend's cock? Bet that's the only way you got him in the first place…"
"Absolutely. It's all I do," Carson drawled. "There are all these tricks you can do, you know. I get him hard so quickly, and then we just keep prolonging it until he's ready to explode. And then we have tons of filthy, animal, anal sex. It's hard to walk all the time these days. Of course, that's why I lash out and call people fags…Oh wait. Was that me or you?"
Alec's friend, Michael, cut in, looking irritated, "Shut up, Carsona. We all know that if anyone could ever want you, you'd give it up in a second. Meanwhile, bet you just go home and hump some of your books, don't you?"
"Do the pages feel good?"
"I bet it makes it harder to reread them, with how sticky they must get."
Joseph, a boy sitting directly to Carson's left, turned to glare at them.
"Can you jackasses save this for when we're not reviewing for a test?" he hissed. "Phillips isn't the only one in this class that gives a shit about his grade, alright?"
"Sure thing, Lupe," Michael spoke up, elbowing Alec with a stupid little smirk, and Carson rolled his eyes.
"Was that seriously a race-joke?" Joseph looked uncharacteristically furious. "This town is so fucking backwards."
"If you can't handle it, then why don't you just re-jump the border?" Danny jumped in and his girlfriend, Stephanie, snickered next to him. "Just go clean a garden or something, Lupe. No habla espanol, so gay-tay or however you say it. Shut up, Pablo. These Mexicans really just have to learn their place…"
Joseph moved abruptly forward, jamming his mechanical pencil into Danny's arm, Danny releasing a sharp yelp as the lead broke against his arm, puncturing just the very surface of his skin before it cracked easily off.
Carson kept his eyes on the board, copying the last problems, and then scanning them carefully to pick out the processes involved.
"This is an AP class," Mr. Howard called from the front of the room. "Either everyone sits down and works now, or I'll call in campus security and all of those involved will end up with suspension at the least. Arborne, go to the nurse. Joseph, outside please."
Joseph growled, slamming his fist against one of the desks, but went anyway, tersely informing Danny as he went: "It's cállate, douchebag", as well as mumbling an apology toward Mr. Howard. Danny slumped petulantly behind him, already beginning to not so subtly show off his "battle wound".
"What a freak," Stephanie muttered, eyeing Joseph with distaste as he left the room. "Mexicans are just gross when they don't…stay quiet. Or something. Danny, do you want me to go with you?"
"Nah, babe, I'll make it," he called back, and she moved up to join him anyway, muttering something about 'making something else' that made him grin.
"You could have at least had his back," Joseph's friend, Eric, hissed towards Carson, moving into Joseph's seat. "He was helping you. Everyone's right about you, aren't they? You're just a selfish dick."
"He wasn't helping me," Carson retorted quietly. "He was trying to get his work done, just like I want mine done, which is why I kept working. Trust me- my involvement would have just made it worse for him."
"Then maybe you really should just disappear altogether, like everyone says" Eric informed him.
"I agree with Jose's friend," Alec cut in, grinning. "And we know your parents do, too, don't we, Carson?"
Carson's teeth gritted.
"I don't know about that, actually. I think everyone's a little too focused on the newest whore in town. Her name's…Maia, or something like that, right?"
"You know a whore's name," Michael asked, smirking. "That says a lot doesn't it, Al? Does she share street corners with you or something, Carsona?"
Carson ignored the gibe in favor of keeping to his plan.
"Well, Alec would know her too, I think. I mean, she is his…"
"Shut the fuck up," Alec said quietly, and Carson arched a brow in challenge.
"Practice what you preach and maybe I will," Carson replied irritably. "Though, you know, if a loser like me knows this, you can bet at least half of the rest of the school does too. Get the hell out of my face and let me work or I'll make sure the rest find out, too."
"What are you gonna do? Write an article about if for the paper?" Alec snarled.
"That's exactly what I'll do."
"I'll kill you," Alec informed him. "You know no-one would care. Hell, look around, no-one's even fucking looked up."
Actually, quite a few had, some his friends who looked to be in one-hundred percent agreement, one or two friends that seemed put ill at ease by his assertion, but a decent amount also just the kids that liked to watch what went down, but never do crap about it, good or bad.
Carson decided it was probably better not to point this out.
"As if you could," he said instead. "Haven't you heard? Smarter always wins. And I'm definitely smarter."
Mr. Howard re-entered the room then and cast a narrow glance over the class before saying shrewdly, "Are any more of you going to need sent to the office? I'd hate to have to knock a letter off of anyone else's grade for the test tomorrow."
"You knocked a letter off of Joseph's test tomorrow?" Eric asked, looking worried, but Mr. Howard simply gave him a stern look.
"We'll speak after class, Eric. Carson, as well- Stay behind, please."
"I have journalism next period, though," Carson objected. "I'm in charge. I have to be there."
"I'm sure Mrs. French can handle it for the first ten minutes."
Carson scowled.
"If she's in there, maybe," he muttered, but at his teacher's sharp glance, he pursed his lips tightly and shrugged his acceptance.
He had to finish this, and he had no desire to lose a letter grade over this. It wasn't like any of the journalism class really did their work, either way. He'd be doing it in the first place, so this shouldn't put him too far behind.
Still, he simmered inwardly, if it wasn't for Alec, Michael, and Danny, he'd probably have had far more done by the end of the night than he now would. Mrs. French, the teacher who'd been roped into supervising journalism, was almost never there. Once she realized that Carson would take care of everything without needing asked she'd simply stopped showing up, except for maybe once a month of checking in. Sometimes twice.
And if no-one was there, there was a good chance kids would leave, or would invite others who were skipping their second period in to have some sort of party. Probably a sex party, since Carson had found increasingly lately that there really was no getting away from sex.
Especially not when you had a horn-dog, self-proclaimed sex-god for boyfriend.
Fuck. He was screwed, wasn't he?
And everyone here knew it, by the looks he was getting.
Carson scowled, unimpressed, at Alec and Michael, both of whom seemed to have zeroed in on him.
At least he'd gotten the subject for an article out of all this. And one that would probably make the Chronicle's rates skyrocket.
Carson raised an eyebrow derisively at the pair and turned back to the board.
He always did end up on top.
"Jesse St. James? You can come back now."
Jesse rose from his seat and moved toward the doctor, who led him toward the back.
"Jesse, it says here you frequently have engaged in intercourse while under the influence of alcohol."
"I like to party," Jesse replied, winking as he pulled himself onto the paper-covered bed in the room, and the doctor raised an eyebrow.
"All right. Well, can you give me a rough percentage of how often you're sure that you've used protection?"
Jesse rolled his eyes.
"Like a condom? Sorry doc, not my style. Ruins the mood, and holds back my natural rush of awesomeness. You're always supposed to go out with a bang, so people never forget you, and a plastic wrap completely ruins the effect. Ask the directors of most any good Hollywood movie with a sex scene."
The doctor stared at him in disbelieving horror.
"But you've been with over thirty partners and have engaged in anal intercourse?"
"I always release outside," Jesse informed him patiently. "So if I'm topping then no damage done. And if I'm bottoming the other person always uses a condom, since even without they'd never match my star power."
"…We're going to have to run a full battery of tests then," the doctor sighed, looking abruptly exhausted. "Thank God they test these days before you give blood..."
Jesse shrugged, laying back.
"I always make sure the other person's protected and clean. I'm not dumb enough to ruin my career as a star with herpes or some illegitimate kid." Then, with a grin: "You know, if my boyfriend were here he would have made out with me for that. It's his way of making me smarter. Any time I use good vocabulary or good logic he sexes me up as a reward. Except without the actual sex. That's why I'm here. He wants to be smart about this or whatever."
"If your boyfriend's smart, he'll make you wear a condom," the doctor informed him. "And where is your partner, anyway? I'm sure he needs tested as well."
"Nope," Jesse grinned. "I'm getting to be his first. Just goes to show how awesome I am, doesn't it?"
"Are you just taking his word for it?"
The doctor's look of suspicion was beginning to piss him off.
"Carson always thought sex-stuff was a waste of time before he and I got together. And even in the start he was never too into it. Now he's started to loosen up and get into it, but there's no way he did before me. He'd tell me if he had. He'd hold it over my fucking head."
"Right, okay," the doctor said, but he still seemed disbelieving. "I'm just going to take these orders out and we'll start getting you ready for the testings we can do today. You're going to need to come back over the next few days for the tests you need to fast beforehand, or that require more complex preparation, as well as for any results that come up quicker and we can discuss at that time. When the entire battery of results have come in, I'll call you to let you know, and you can come in to pick them up."
The doctor picked up a clipboard he'd placed on the small counter in the room and rifled through Jesse's paperwork.
"Looks like you signed everything right. I'll just get my orders out and turn these forms in and we can get started."
"Good. I need to be out of here in time for my waxing appointment."
The doctor turned right back around, heaving a sigh, and sat back down on his stool.
"Is this a full waxing?"
"Oh, no, I like my arms and legs with some man on them."
The doctor's eyes closed with exasperation.
"Of course you do."
Carson slowly packed up his backpack as his classmates filed out, Alec clapping him once, hard, on the back before he left, and Michael throwing him a smug smile.
Eric was already at Mr. Howard's desk, having thrown Carson several dirty looks during class and now moved on to just trying to weasel himself out of trouble, and maybe Joseph if he managed to save himself first. Which wasn't looking too good.
"Mr. Crew, do you care to make your case for yelling at me during my class?"
Eric scowled.
"I was just upset that my friend was getting burned just because he tried to help Carson against the classroom jerks, and wasn't going to let them get away with being fucking racist toward him."
"Language," Mr. Howard admonished, but he looked concerned.
"How were they being racist? And Carson, because you were involved, please feel free to jump in."
"He won't jump in. He doesn't give a shit about anyone but himself."
"Language," Mr. Howard said again, looking more angry than before. "Why don't you leave that up to your classmate? I asked the pair of you to stay behind today for a reason. You two and Joseph are three of my best students, and today all three of you were taken off topic and engaged in a conflict that will likely prevent you from doing as well on your test tomorrow."
"You taking any of us down a letter won't help," Eric pronounced, looking severely bothered. "We actually do the work. Why are we being faulted for the fact that some jerks in this class won't stop running their mouths?"
"Tell me what happened, and if necessary we can file an incident report."
"Well, he," Eric gestured to where Carson stood in the midst of the desks, watching them guardedly, "was the one it started with. I wasn't paying attention until those guys started in on Joe."
Carson shifted uncomfortably.
An incident report would take at least an hour of his time if it came to that… But the death threats were starting to mildly concern him, with how frequently they were coming in now. And they used to only really be online, or privately, but that had just been pretty largely public. Still, he had work to do today, and it wasn't conductive to his schedule to spend that much time on his pathetic classmates.
They weren't smart enough to get away with killing him, anyway, or brave enough. Who cared about a couple threats? Or a couple dozen.
"They were just doing what they always do," Carson said, rolling his eyes. "It's annoying, but not really a big deal or anything. Can we go?"
The passing period was almost over, and he really wanted to get to journalism by, if not before, the bell.
Mr. Howard frowned at him.
"If you report harassment-"
"He won't. He doesn't care. He doesn't give enough of a shit for anything anyone says to matter anyway. Sorry, language, I know. But it's true," Eric spoke up defiantly, and Carson shrugged when the teacher looked back at him.
It wasn't necessarily true, but Carson would have preferred it to be, anyway, and he really did just want to get to class.
"What he said. Can I leave, please?"
Mr. Howard stared at him for a moment, hard, then sighed, as if in disappointment.
"Sure, fine. Do you need a pass?"
But Carson was already out the door.
"Well," the man said heavily, looking back to Eric, who seemed unsurprised. "At least he's dedicated."
"Yeah, dedicated to his own ass. Doesn't care about the rest of us."
Mr. Howard raised an eyebrow at him, and Eric smiled sheepishly.
"Yeah, I know. Language. Please don't knock me down a letter, too."
It was two weeks later and Dr. Lanes looked astonished, in an annoyed sort of way.
"You're completely clean. I don't know how it happened but…"
"The universe loves me," Jesse informed him.
"Well, you're very, very lucky, but you should still be using protection," the doctor replied. "Luck runs out eventually, and if you love this boyfriend of yours at all-"
"Carson. His name's Carson."
"Right, Carson then…Wait, Carson… As in Sheryl Phillips' kid- with the bad attitude?"
The doctor looked horrified; Jesse, amused.
"You know Carson? I love his attitude. It's so hot."
The doctor shook his head, seeming more and more appalled by the minute.
"He's come in for research purposes several times, and wrote an article that said the care was too biased and personal at this clinic. My daughter goes to school with that kid, and said it was one of the few weeks the paper got read. We lost a sponsor when the local news caught wind. Kid cost us traffic."
"That's Carson for you," Jesse smiled. "He's impossible not to love, isn't he?"
The doctor scowled.
"Here's your report, Mr. St. James. I think we're done, don't you?"
Jesse winked.
"Thanks doc. I couldn't get any from Carson without you. If you ever want free tickets to one of my shows when I'm famous, well, more so than I am already, they're yours. Unless it's more than five. That costs a threesome. Bye!"
Dr. Lanes grimaced.
"Just grab some condoms on the way out please! I don't want to have to treat your boyfriend for anything."
Jesse sighed.
"Carson won't let me go without. He already bought like ten different kinds of condoms and lube and everything, and is experimenting with the chemicals to see how they interact or something. I think it's a little much, but he's way too sexy when he's being smart like that, and it derails my thoughts, so I'm just going along with it. Bye!"
The doctor closed his eyes wearily and turned around to the nurse on call.
"Think the next patient can wait the ten minutes it will take me to stop needing to scream into a pillow?"
"Well, you know where all the spare ones are," she replied understandingly. "I'm sure they can wait. They sat with that boy in the waiting room already, so they'll definitely understand."
Amy was grinning at Carson.
"Andrew gave me his key and I came over to surprise you. But I found something… Are you…active now?"
Carson's forehead wrinkled.
"You're going to have to be more specific. Please tell me you didn't drag Andrew along, Amy?"
"No, no. Not at all."
She was still grinning, head cocked ever so slightly to the side.
His eyebrows were almost in his hair.
"Care to tell me what you're so excited about? You seem more psychotic than usual."
A beat. She was still grinning.
"Did you get hit by a car and buried in Pet Symmetry while I was at school? I wouldn't put it past Andrew to do that."
She blew out a gust of air, still looking almost euphoric.
"Is it as amazing as they say? It wasn't bad was it?"
Carson rubbed a hand over his forehead.
"What? School? It's terrible, as always."
"No! Sex!"
Carson's face fell slack a moment, then blanked over, his expression becoming deadpan.
"It was like every dream I've ever had come true."
Amy frowned at him.
"Don't make me get my step-brother over here. If he finds out you've devirginized with Jesse…It was with Jesse right?"
"It will be," Carson informed her, with a sigh. "Future tense."
Amy stared at him a long moment, abruptly less happy looking.
"Are you sure about this?"
Carson rolled his eyes.
"Absolutely. He's clean, I'm clean, we'll be smart, and it's a logical next step anyway."
"Isn't the next step, like…oral or something? Handjobs? You don't want to make too much of a dramatic leap."
He smirked, and she dropped hard onto his bed.
"When did all this happen?"
Carson sat down slowly at his desk, shrugging.
"Why does it matter? Amy, you know I don't actually see these things as that big of a deal. As long as I'm being smart about it-"
"Are you? Are you actually being smart about it?"
Carson nodded.
"I have no doubt. If you're fine now, is there anything else you wanted?"
Amy smiled at him.
"Yes. Homework help me, please? My advanced lit class is getting a little difficult and I'm not as sure on my essays anymore. Can you look over them? Be as brutal as you want."
Carson beamed, immediately taking the papers she pulled from her backpack, and pulling out his collection of pens and highlighters.
"That's a dangerous thing to say."
In his mind, the image of Jesse came, unbidden, and he hid a smile as he changed the tense of a noun.
It would definitely be soon.
Jesse sprayed whipped cream atop his coffee, licking his lips. Across from him, Carson was flipping through his test results, looking more than a little amused.
"Did you know the doctor wrote some of your answers to his questions on the back of your registration page?"
Jesse nodded.
"What I say is too awesome to not write down, especially when you're new to my company."
Carson snorted, but said nothing, continuing to leaf through.
"Everything looks good."
"Yes it does," Jesse responded lasciviously, and Carson smirked.
"Did you do your homework?"
"Yes sir," Jesse murmured, licking at the whipped cream and ignoring Carson's eye-roll at the gesture.
"Teacher fetish."
"You bet. Want to shower first? Your mom's working until…"
"Six am," Carson reminded him, pulling a case from under the table and beginning to rifle through it. "She's working the graveyard shift, but she always leaves at least three hours early, so that she can get a little buzzed at the bar and still be okay for work. Tonight it was four and a half because she wanted to drink more than usual."
"Why?" Jesse asked, one of his hands raising as he leaned back to sensually tease through his own curls.
"She found all my condoms," Carson retorted drolly, eyes following Jesse's movements raptly, though the rest of him remained cool as a cucumber. "And I doubt we can both fit very easily into our shower." The rest of him that was visible that was, Jesse smirked, noting the long shirt that ended a third of the way down his boyfriend's thighs.
His eyes were afire already, the observation beginning to send him over the edge.
"Maybe we can give it a shot, though?"
Carson laughed.
"Well, you did do your homework…"
"I also know the word inebriated now."
Carson stood and moved toward him slowly, a cat towards its prey.
"Definition?"
He was right over Jesse now.
Jesse swallowed and licked his lips again, putting his coffee on the table.
"Intoxicated."
Carson's hand found his, the other his hair, taking Jesse's place within the recently vacated curls.
"Vocabulary."
Their lips brushed, once, twice, and then sunk in, hands tightening, Carson's leg coming over to straddle him hard, as his tongue invaded Jesse's mouth and then Jesse's his in turn, their heated breath mingling, lips twitching up to smile against one another.
"This is a lot for vocabulary," Jesse murmured teasingly as his lips moved to Carson's ear, and Carson chuckled dryly.
"They were really good words."
Carson's head moved down, his tongue finding Jesse's adams apple and stroking out, giving it a long, hot lap, then his lips pursed as the knob bobbed up and down with Jesse's ever-heavier breathing, sucking on the spot.
"Marking your territory?"
Carson huffed out a warm breath and found Jesse's lips again, grinding down hard as he did.
Tongue against tongue, heart to heart, thighs pressed in close, and erections throbbing, pulsating together, the two men wrapped their arms around each other, trying any way possible to get closerclosercloser.
They'd get as close as they could until they became one.
"Shower," Jesse murmured, but it came out more a breathless whine, and Jesse pressed in another searing kiss to make up for it, though Carson was already nodding, chest heaving up and down and wanton lust shining in his eyes, a deeper, more molten shade of blue than usual.
Penetrating.
"Let's go."
The shower steamed fast, and the tub was most definitely large enough to accommodate them both, Jesse decided.
Each of their faces was a ruddy red from the sex already thick between them, making out alone building up that tension and sweaty, carnal aroma, chests still heaving.
Flashes of walls they'd taken turns pinning each other to as they moved towards the bathroom blurred away as their hands found material then skin.
Carson was first, as he so often seemed to be, tugging Jesse's shirt off, palms rubbing over every new expanse of flesh shown, while Jesse's hands, once free, immediately seized on the clasp of Carson's belt, then the button of his jeans, flicking it open expertly, a groan coming from beneath his teeth as Carson's closed quickly over a nipple, his tongue moving out to assuage any pain.
Carson's jeans slid down easily, exposing his legs, and Jesse pressed him up for another deep, throbbing kiss, then licked slowly along his jaw, pulling at Carson's shirt as he did so, and kissing down over his chest as he pulled the material up, raising a light sheen of sweat over his boyfriend's skin, the fog of the still steaming shower coating them in heat. Bit by bit, his knees bent, until they were on the floor, and he kissed, open-mouthed, over Carson's waist, and then down, over the noticeable rod of flesh beneath the plain blue of his underwear.
Carson sucked in a little gust of air, a moan bubbling from between his swollen lips, and Jesse smiled against his boyfriend's erection.
He lifted a hand from where he'd braced it on the floor and moved it to Carson, thumb sliding over where he knew the head of his cock would be, and Carson exhaled heavily above him.
"Stop fucking dawdling, asshole," Carson groused down at him, too late by moments, as Jesse pulled the underwear down quickly and caught his mouth around as much of Carson's length as he could, his laugh at the complaint sending intense vibrations through the sensitive flesh that drove a shiver up Carson's spine and a sharp groan from his lips.
Jesse took a moment, letting his throat relax, taking his boyfriend in deeper, as deep as he dared for now, and then moved quickly back, his spit glistening over the rigid organ, letting his tounge swirl around the tip, feeling Carson grow harder and bigger as he worked. Carson's legs were tense and Jesse ran a hand over them, murmuring an instruction of "Relax" that he knew Carson wouldn't follow, focused as he made a twisting motion with his hand around Carson's cock and chased the hand with his mouth.
"Relax for me babe…"
Carson, for once, didn't object to the term of endearment in anyway but to wrap his fingers in Jesse's hair, moving him forward.
Jesse smirked and hummed around Carson, making the younger release a choked moan, another shiver snaking through him, and Jesse pulled off with a wet, obscene pop, Carson's hand still wrapped in his hair, though forcelessly.
Carson's breath was slowly calming as he fought to regain control of himself, eyes closed, shiny lips plush and gaping, his muscles giving the occasional small spasm as he worked to calm himself.
Jesse watched, the images making him fully harden, and he reached for Carson's hand, clasping their fingers together as he licked his boyfriend's precome slowly from around his mouth.
The shower was still pouring steam from behind them.
"Do you want to top this time or me?" Jesse asked quietly, and Carson's breathing sped back up minutely.
"Can I?"
And Jesse nodded, because, fuck, he didn't care as long as he had him. He really didn't care. And he got the feeling that Carson needed the security of taking charge for his first time, anyway. Jesse already knew he was a 50-50 runner, but Carson would have no real idea.
"Promise to fuck my brains out?" Jesse asked, smirking, and Carson's breath caught, a smile forming.
"Fuck. Yes. But first," Carson kissed him soundly. "Shower."
The two boys moved in for one more deep kiss under the shower's spray, before separating dutifully and washing themselves, and sometimes each other- if honesty was to be had- diligently, if a bit longer than was exactly necessary.
Jesse was in the midst of lathering his hair when he felt Carson against him, sliding slowly down.
"Casper…"
Carson's breath and the shower's mist enveloped his dick, then he was actually enveloped and he moaned powerfully, leaning back against the shower wall.
Carson reached behind himself to turn the shower's heat down, then began slowly to build his way back up towards Jesse's ear with hot open-mouthed kisses, the temperature difference making a contrast of delicious, fucking sexy as hell anguish that left him feeling somehow even more hard and throbbing than before.
"Fuck…"
Carson mouthed over to his chest, sucking briefly onto a nipple, then continued on his journey up until his lips were at the shell of Jesse's ear and their erections were pressed against one another.
"I told you I did some research…"
"Goddamn, Carson," Jesse muttered. "Did you study porn or something?"
"Maybe a little bit… Now, hurry up and we'll go to my room…But don't hurry too much. I need you clean…"
"Carson, I hate you so much right now," Jesse murmured, before turning his head to catch his boyfriend into a searing kiss beneath the cold water.
Carson smirked.
"Just wait."
"Power hungry tyrant."
"Vocabulary, lecher."
Carson gave him another kiss, grinding hard against him in a way that made light begin to burst behind his eyelids.
"What does lecher mean?"
"You'll have to look it up," Carson informed him. "Get clean."
"Are you done already?"
"I'm efficient, sweetheart," Carson retorted, looking supremely self-satisfied.
Jesse groaned.
"Too much dirty talk. How the fuck do you do that?"
"I'm smart as hell," Carson said with a grin. "Hurry the fuck up, oh sex god, or I might start doubting your abilities."
"Then I'll just have to prove them to you even harder," Jesse called out as he began rinsing himself off as quickly as possible. "My stamina will astonish you!"
"Your ego astonishes me on a regular basis," Carson called back. Then, ducking his head back into the doorway: "But I just may take you up on that challenge."
Jesse smirked into the water.
He'd definitely met his match in Carson.
And the whole building up to sex thing Carson had been so firm about was paying off like fuck, holy shit.
He started humming the tune of Push It, then singing as he turned off the water and ran a towel quickly over himself, then slowly moved, still naked, toward Carson's room.
"Carson, babe, why does your room look like Dexter's Laboratory?"
Carson looked up at him, eyebrow raised.
"I was doing research. You already knew this."
Jesse laughed.
"You're insane, do you realize that?"
"But it turns you on like fuck, doesn't it?" Carson asked grinning. "We both know it does. It's more than a little obvious, especially right now."
His eyes went blatantly to Jesse's cock, which seemed to stand a little more firmly at attention under his boyfriend's unfaltering examination.
Jesse grinned and moved forward, dropping onto the bed.
"You drive me crazy, I just can't sleep. I'm so excited-"
"No Britney Spears," Carson said, looking horrified. "I refuse to fuck you if you don't switch songs now. That damn thing's already stuck in my head, and I hate her with a passion. I'll be unable to be interested in anything even remotely sexual if you keep this up."
"But it's Britney," Jesse exclaimed. "How can you hate Britney?"
"Extremely easily," Carson informed him, and Jesse noted the way his boyfriend already looked far less turned-on. His erection had waned a bit already, and… Yeah, Britney Spears wasn't worth losing sex, at least not with Carson. Adam Lambert maybe, but…
That reminded him!
"I left my iPod in the living room," Jesse announced. "You still have your player in here right?"
And dashed from the room without an answer.
Carson groaned loudly.
"Oh no. Jesse."
Jesse reentered the room a moment later, grinning as he held up the iPod.
"Mood music."
"No mood music," Carson said emphatically.
"It's not Britney," Jesse said pleasantly. "You have my word."
"No mood music."
"Please," Jesse murmured, coming closer, and Carson groaned.
"Don't even try that, Jess…"
"Come on. I'm using protection for you!"
Carson's brow furrowed.
"You scare me sometimes…"
"It's perfect for us! And-"
"Oh for fuck's sake, put it in Jesse."
Jesse's eyes flashed.
"Freudian slip?"
"No," Carson laughed. "You can have your mood music, since I'm topping. But that just means I'll force you to look at more vocabulary later."
"I don't have a problem with that," Jesse grinned, putting his iPod into the doc and scrolling to a playlist labeled "JARSON SEX".
For Your Entertainment by Adam Lambert immediately started playing, and Jesse turned back to his boyfriend with a smirk.
"Bed?"
"…Bed."
Carson reached out a hand, fingers stroking down Jesse's arm.
"Get on first, and lay down, okay?"
Jesse narrowed his eyes at him, a small smile toying at his lips.
"What do you have planned?"
Carson waggled his brows, smirking, and leaned in to for a quick peck, before giving him a small, playful shove.
"I'm in charge, aren't I, Jesse?"
"Yes, sir," Jesse murmured. "Fuck yes, sir."
Carson snorted.
"You're getting a little too into your teacher-fetish, Jesse."
The sounds of him rummaging through what sounded like a plastic bag had Jesse twisting a little onto his side to look at his boyfriend. Carson was standing by his desk, bag in hand and back turned to Jesse.
Jesse watched him, a slow smile curling his lips, and then turning into a bright smirk as Carson dropped a tube of what looked like lube.
"You gonna get that?"
Carson turned around, eyebrow raised.
"Pervert. Close your eyes Jess."
Jesse frowned, but closed his eyes with an over-exaggerated sigh.
"Why? It's not like I haven't seen you before."
"Like I care about that," Carson brushed him off, and Jesse heard the lube or whatever get picked up. "I decided that since I'm taking the reins I'm also going to surprise you. After all, you force surprises on me all the time and I hate them."
"If you bring a scalpel over here I call for divorce."
Carson hushed him, the smirk evident in the sound, and Jesse licked his lips.
"Fuck. You're practically devious."
Lips touched his own and he kissed back hungrily before he felt Carson's weight move onto the bed.
"Vocabulary," Carson said matter of factly before…
Well, shit.
Carson's lips closed around Jesse's dick, kissing the tip, then licking slowly at it in a small circular motion, lapping at him. Like a cat at milk.
Carson was totally his cat. Fuck yeah.
And then his lips were gone and his eyebrow was arched in amusement at Jesse.
Well, that was rude.
Fuck his boyfriend was such a cat.
"Mouth good. Off bad," Jesse informed him pointedly, and Carson rolled his eyes.
"You're a caveman now? I mean, I knew you were behind on the evolutionary scale, but that's pretty bad."
Jesse grinned.
"If I cloned myself and had sex I'd be so easy a caveman could do me. But for now, you'll do. Me, preferably. Mouth!"
Carson snorted.
"Did you just attempt to dub me a caveman, as well? Because we both know I'm far higher on the evolutionary scale than you are."
Jesse sighed.
"Yes, yes, you're fucking amazing. Now, will you please go back to sucking my dick? Or put one of your condoms on, since we can't go without for whatever reason, and fuck my brains out already."
Carson frowned.
"I'm drawing it out. It will make it better!"
"You need to stop researching things," Jesse retorted, looking at him with a mixture of exasperation and affection. "It's bad for your health. And now mine."
He glanced down at his own straining erection, then at Carson, then back again.
Carson looked as well, then back at Jesse.
"You're also supposed to use protection when fellating someone," he informed Jesse, and for once he looked torn. "Being smart-"
Jesse sighed and reached for his boyfriend, propping himself up slightly with one elbow.
"We're being smart, but we've already done oral without today. We both know we're clean, in every way. If you need to, fine, but Carson, come on. You need to stop overthinking this."
Carson's eyes darkened a bit, his lips pursing, then a corner turned up and a glint appeared.
"You sure about that?" he positively purred. Fucking purred.
The challenge was like flipping a switch.
Jesse moaned a yes and Carson moved lithely forward between his boyfriend's spread legs, mouth dropping down instantly over the head of his cock, and staying there a moment, his throat contracting around it. Jesse let out a deep groan and Carson hummed and smirked around him, pulling slowly up with his tongue flat on the underside until he reached the head and pursed his lips around it, sucking with various degrees of strength tongue swirling and fingers going up to wrap around the stem of his boyfriend's length.
"You sure I should stop researching?" he murmured over the tip, eyes wide and dark, smoldering blue, heavy with mischief.
Jesse shook his head on the pillow back and forth quickly, eyes still shut, breath heavy.
"Fuck you."
Carson pursed his lips smugly and gave the tip of his boyfriend's dick another sweeping lick.
"I'm pretty sure it's going to be the other way around…"
Jesse eyes fluttered open as he felt Carson's mouth close around him once more, immersing him in wet heat, one hand making a firm wringing motion around his shaft in time with the bobbing of his head. His eyes were closed now, forehead slightly creased. He looked focused the way he did when he was editing a paper or reading a book, and Jesse had to look away, his own eyes falling closed, to avoid coming far too early, which was ridiculous in the best way possible given that he was a fucking sex god. Jesse's eyes opened again when he'd calmed down from explosion, unable to keep from the indelible image of his boyfriend already seared into his corneas, memorized and stored carefully, but not good enough, not enough, when reality was right down there and doing…that.
Fuck. That.
And then Carson moved from around his cock, and began mouthing his way down the underside of his shaft, licking and kissing, eyes open now, but still focused, studying, and Jesse memorized that too, because, fuck, how could he not?
And then…
Fuck.
Jesse felt the hot, smooth slide of Carson's tongue as he licked a trail down from the base of his dick, sweeping warmly across his balls, then down, moving agonizingly slow until.
Until.
Jesse's back arched up off the bed as Carson's tongue skimmed his perineum several times, and then fell ever so slightly further down, so that it touched upon the tight ring of muscle circling his hole, then slid back up over his perineum and back down again, this time lingering over the rim, pushing at the muscles. Heat washed over Jesse and he moaned, pushing down hard onto his boyfriend's tongue.
"Fuck, Carson, always research. Research is good."
"Told you," Carson informed his asshole pointedly, and Jesse half-laughed, half-groaned, hips still thrusting down of their own volition, desperate for more of that sweet, slick, heat on him, inside him.
Carson licked a hard stripe over the twitching muscle, and then bent his tongue, angling it toward the center of the ring; then he swirled out, switching back to open-mouth kisses which
he scattered in trails slowly leading back, until eventually his kisses found the puckered opening.
Carson's eyes were wide and intense, focused as ever as he worked, Jesse's closed and heavy, fisting the sheets around him and the pillow behind him as he subconsciously ground down on Carson's smirking lips, a sheen of sweat decorating his flesh with pheromones.
His cock, below, stood harder than ever at attention, precome gleaming and dripping from the swollen, cherry tip, which was abruptly engulfed in warm, wet heat as Carson's mouth returned up once more, sucking him raw, taking in every pearling juice without blinking an eye.
In fact, his eyes, now, were focused on Jesse, examining his expression, analytically taking in every twitching, tensing muscle, every flex and shiver, every eyelash flutter.
Blazing blue fixed itself up at him, while sinful lips wrapped themselves around his cock with the strangest air of study, and Jesse's eyes ceased fluttering at the image, unable to move. The two stared at each other through the sex that shrouded them, a flame licking in time with Carson himself through each of their cores.
And then Carson did this thing with his tongue and his hand and his blue eyes scorched and Jesse's back arched every so slightly, his head going further back against the pillow, neck tensing up entirely and he let out a shuddering, throaty groan.
"Fuck. Carson."
Carson didn't reply, his head still bobbing, eyes darting over him, studying, then closing with focus, then repeating the process again moments later, and then Jesse felt his boyfriend's hand come up and tangle their fingers, and his breathing quickly began to even as he wrapped his fingers with Carson's, their slick palms pressed together, kissing softly.
"Babe…"
Carson shook his head slightly, bringing himself up so that his lips were pressed gently to the slit in Jesse's dick, tongue flicking and swirling and making Jesse see stars, which would normally be funny, but fuck was he good at this, if a bit too studied, too perfectionist, because this was Carson, and those things, those ridiculous Carson idiosyncrasies just made…
Jesse's thoughts were cut short, then off entirely, as a finger from his boyfriend's other hand pressed to his lips and without thinking he took it into his mouth, sucking and licking hard, immediately recognizing what the action meant, and his ability to really think shutting down at the knowledge of what was going to happen.
They were so close.
Jesse used his own free hand to fumble over the bed, fingers scrabbling for what he knew was there, if only because he knew his boyfriend, though it was surely helping that, surprises aside, he and Carson had talked about these things beforehand a lot.
A moment more of each of them sucking, Jesse's still searching fingers found the handle of a plastic bag and dragged it up toward him, reaching in to grasp a small, thin bottle of silicone-based lubricant.
Saliva may have been working so far, but Carson had been unwilling to yield to chance any further, Jesse was well aware, and he definitely had no problem with that on this one. They both knew, Carson from research, Jesse from experience, that any more progression would need help.
Jesse undid the lid between his thumb and forefinger, just barely able to hear the small click of it opening beneath the throbbing pound of blood in his ears, Carson's mouth all over him, and Adam Lambert's voice blanketing the room in fevered, primal sound.
"But I'm about to turn up the heat; I'm here for your entertainment. It's all right. You'll be fine; Baby I'm in control. Take the pain; Take the pleasure; I'm the master of both. Close your eyes, not your mind, Let me into your soul. I'm gonna work it 'til you're totally blown…"
Carson's finger was trembling as it was coated in gel, the only real sign of how much he was wanting, and of how nervous he was, and Jesse forced himself up lightly to lay a kiss at the base of it as he finished, his mind fuzzing with the intense magnetization as his eyes returned to the boy between his legs and he examined the lines in his boyfriend's furrowed brow, the undone smirk still peeking from its home at the bottom lip's left corner, the crimson flush creeping over the top of his cheekbones, neck, chest, and shoulders.
Carson's lips quivered around his boyfriend, his tongue dancing harder, faster, over rigid flesh, as his finger slowly moved down and pressed forward, rubbing at the tight ring of heat and squirming, clenching muscle.
Jesse's breaths came out as shudders, and he ground down, while simultaneously bringing his hips up, his cock impaling itself in Carson's mouth, triggering his gag reflex as it touched the back of his throat, his boyfriend's finger dipping into his still wet, puckered hole and hooking slightly.
Carson's eyes were watering but hard, filled with single-minded determination as he choked, then pulled up for a hard breath over Jesse's tip, then down again, as far down as he could get, eyes closed now, brow furrowed. He tried to hum, despite his already contracting throat, and the tightness and vibration sent Jesse over the edge, just as Carson pulled his single digit from
inside Jesse and then plunged in with two, making Jesse's vision go white around for a second, the beginnings of orgasm shaking him.
Carson moved quickly as his boyfriend writhed, stretching him carefully, but efficiently, wiggling and scissoring his fingers, angling to the side, searching out the feel of spongy tissue. According to his research, it should be right….
Jesse jerked, a loud groan escaping, and Carson nodded to himself, analyzing the reaction and his own movement before repeating the gesture, eyes zooming over his boyfriend, taking in every detail, and then beginning a steady, careful movement with his fingers, stretching Jesse gingerly, trying to bear in mind every tip and trick he'd read.
Then, slowly, added a third finger, evaluating and taking mental note of his boyfriend's reaction.
"Carson, I'm experienced," Jesse grunted. "I've done this before, plenty of times. That's plenty prep. Just do it, babe."
Carson blinked, and stopped his movement, and Jesse took a deep breath, trying to refocus his thoughts and calm his heart rate.
He wanted to hold off on actually coming yet, and he doubted he could do that if Carson didn't…
Jesse forced his eyes open and eyed his boyfriend.
"Carson?"
"Give me a minute?" Carson breathed, and Jesse propped himself up, looking at his boyfriend dazedly.
"What's wrong? Stage fright. It happens to the best of performers, babe…Except for me of course, but- Carson, do you want some help?"
Carson looked irritated, which Jesse figured wasn't helping.
"This is ridiculous," he retorted, and Jesse laughed, the sound a little choked with his continued arousal, which was still going strong, despite the unexpected interlude.
"You thought about it too much," Jesse informed him. "And you'll make it worse getting frustrated."
"Maybe we're not being smart enough about this."
"Oh, hell," Jesse moaned. "We're not doing that. If anything you're being too smart. Carson, come here and shove your tongue down my throat already, please?"
Carson glowered at him, but moved forward anyway, sliding down next to Jesse, who immediately turned on his side, and cupped his boyfriend's jaw, kissing him tenderly.
"Sex isn't about being amazing, even if I am," he informed Carson, their foreheads together, and Carson snorted softly. "You've gotta learn not to think as much."
"That's not necessarily-"
"During sex," Jesse interrupted, grinding abruptly against him, and Carson swallowed his words, feeling himself slowly beginning to re-harden. "How's it been helping you so far, babe?"
Carson rolled his eyes, but didn't reply for a long moment, trying to concentrate on the sensation of Jesse against him.
Jesse watched him, taking his boyfriend's fingers into his own as he did.
"I want you to fuck me," he murmured, breath ghosting over Carson's lips, which opened involuntarily. "Think you can handle it, Casper? I'm not so sure…"
Carson twitched, eyes widening, tongue swiping over his lips.
"Can you, Carson?" Jesse asked lowly. "Can you…rise to the occasion?"
Carson snorted derisively at the clear innuendo, then smashed their lips together forcefully, Jesse grinning into the kiss.
"Hey there…What should we name him?"
Carson pulled back slightly.
"Jess, if you name my penis, I'll either kill you, or never have sex with you again after today."
"I'll die happy."
"I will name your penis too, and you won't like it. Now for fuck's sake-"
But he was cut off as Jesse once more dragged their lips together, rubbing against his boyfriend, the friction going straight to each of their groins. Carson groaned, the sound deep and vibrating against the slide of his boyfriend's tongue, Jesse moaning back and pulling at his boyfriend, the pair moving, writhing, together until Carson was between Jesse's spread legs, hard once more, achingly so, with Jesse grinning into their steadily sloppier kissing.
Carson reached over one-handedly to grab the bottle of lubricant and slather his fingers in it again, while Jesse grabbed the condom Carson had placed on the single nightstand, tracing the outline of it inside its package as he felt his boyfriend's warm, long fingers probing and massaging him once more, with them all the while never stopping their hungry, frenzied grinding.
Now that they'd gotten back to the first order of business, everything seemed to blur away and speed up, their pace becoming frantic as their need grew increasingly, their hunger rapacious and like molten fire in their every vein.
One finger, then two entered Jesse in much faster succession than before, Carson seeming to have been restored his instincts (fucking thank God), and the slight burn that speed elicited made Jesse all the more desperate and agonizingly hard, a tantalizing edge of pain that made the rest seem all the hotter and made his heart, already a jackhammer in his chest, beat warmly all the faster.
Their tongues battled, dipped and dove and rubbed furiously, making love themselves in the place of the men's hands and external organs, wet and slippery and unrelenting as they danced and rubbed together, their taste buds as active as the rest of their bodies, soaking in every minute taste that made each of them purely them, and the blend that was them too, but in a more complete way.
More lubricant was massaged in and on and a third finger crooked into Jesse once more, his hips bucking at the beginning of that filling sensation he needed, but not enough when there was Carson right there. It was like offering a homeless man emotional support, while you held the food and water just out of his reach; and, Jesse decided, it was bullshit.
"Carson," he moaned. "Now."
And Carson's eyes on his were just as wanting, just as aflame with need; his lips were just as craving and searching and ravishing; his free hand was everywhere at once.
"Hold on," Carson murmured. "Not yet. I want to be sure."
"Stop thin-"
But Carson shut him up with the usual hard kiss, and Jesse felt his fingers moving inside him, stretching, preparing. Their withdrawl made Jesse want to hiss, though his experience made him only sink further into his boyfriend's open lips and grind his hips up harder.
Carson responded with equal force, his fervor simmering in the blue flame of his eyes on Jesse's gleaming hazel, each darker yet somehow brighter than usual beneath the veil of sex that clung to them.
Carson abandoned his plundering a moment, mouthing his way over Jesse's jaw, then throat, taking the long route to the shell of his ear.
"Fuck me," Jesse grunted into the empty air, eyes heavily closed, and his boyfriend's lips turned up against the sensitive flesh of his ear, coming over to pull gently at the lobe, before returning to the shell.
"I'm going to…I need that condom you're holding though."
Jesse groaned, turning his head to wrap his lips around Carson's, asserting his own measure of dominance, a hand going down to seize Carson hard and give him a taunting tug, thumbing over the slit at the head of his cock.
"Let me put it on you."
Carson nodded jerkily, his breath coming in sharp, wanton gasps as he struggled to maintain the self-control he'd only just restored, and Jesse smirked, ripping the package swiftly open with his teeth and extracting the prophylactic, moving it to the tip of Carson's dick and rolling it down slowly until it sheathed him completely.
Carson watched his every movement with hungry rapture, hypnotized at the red staining his skin in blush, the sweat making everything perversely shiny, verging on pornographic in and of itself.
Carnal intoxication beat down on the pair, as their bodies moved hard against one another still, Jesse's hand lingering licentiously on his boyfriend's cock, lips licked, gleaming swollen and debauched. He pumped once, then pulled away to pop open the lube again, squeezing a glob into his palm and reaching forward to grasp Carson once more, coating him in the cool gel.
"You ready?" he murmured, and Carson's eyes rose from watching the motion of his hand to his own, dark and worried, but definitely wanting.
"Shouldn't I be asking you that?" Carson asked quietly, tongue flicking out to lick nervously at his lips.
Jesse smirked fondly at him.
"I'm a sex god, remember?"
Carson nodded, moving slowly, carefully over him, eyes never moving.
"How could I forget?"
"You're scared?"
"…Only on irrational levels I have under control."
Jesse reached up to him, wrapping his arms around his boyfriend's sweaty torso, pulling it down to him.
"Should we count down to the big moment, babe?"
"Oh, for fuck's sake," Carson muttered, and moved forward before the three could hit the air.
Jesse groaned deeply, sucking in a breath through his mouth and nose.
"Keep going," he murmured.
Carson's eyes had fallen closed, his hands in the sheets clenched, perspiration beading his forehead and arms, tracing a sheen over his nipples.
"Oh fuck," he mumbled, and Jesse quickly brought his head up to press a kiss to Carson's lips.
"Don't think."
Carson moved.
Jesse tightened his arms around his boyfriend, pulling him closer, and Carson's eyes were wide and suddenly bright, cerulean irises blown wide as they met Jesse's own.
"I think I understand stupid people's addiction to this now… it's… so tight."
"I've rendered you incoherent, huh, babe?" Jesse mumbled up to him throatily and Carson gave a deep moan, the sound ricocheting between them as their lips met hard and searing once more, twisting against each other, the word "Vocabulary" falling from Carson's lips, moved by his tongue to Jesse's own.
Their tongues plundered one another's mouths, in time with Carson's steadily more frenzied thrusting, Jesse's tongue taking over as Carson fell more wholly to his own part until they were each within each other as deeply as they could go, though trying with everything they had, every new thrust, to take themselves deeper still.
Carson's blunt nails dug into his hips, sliding down and up, leaving a trail of possession in their wake that shouldn't have made Jesse's own hips buck up, taking his boyfriend in a little more
inadvertently, but absolutely did, and Carson groaned again at the motion, nails clenching even more, his grip almost certain to bruise, a fact that had Jesse fighting the urge to just fucking come already, because it was the most completely he'd ever felt owned, like he belonged to someone, as Carson did to him in turn.
It was the most erotically romantic thing he'd ever felt, but the only thought it persisted of was: deeper.
And deeper they went, adjusting together, Jesse's leg (fucking thank God he'd done ballet; he could never be grateful enough for the gifts that had given him) moving out then up over Carson, going down to wrap over the top of his thighs tightly, dragging him up, and Carson eyes squeezed shut, brow rumpled with effort and concentration and his clinging attempts at control, but Jesse just smirked and blew softly on the outer ridge of his collar, then ear, because, sorry, babe, but he was the sex god here, and the one with experience, and there was no need to try so hard because they were definitely doing this again, no matter what Carson had tried saying before.
"You can let go," Jesse muttered, but Carson's head bowed and shook against his neck.
"I want to make it last…"
Jesse laughed huskily, turning his head to kiss Carson's hair.
"Don't push yourself too hard… Just me."
"Into you," Carson muttered back, and Jesse had to kiss him again when the words couldn't even manage a hint of snark.
"You're in me already," Jesse whispered back, trailing his tongue wetly over his boyfriend's jaw.
Carson grunted, lids fluttering, fists clenching.
Words fell away.
Carson moaned deeply, burying his head down hard in the crook of his boyfriend's shoulder, kissing, sucking, and biting the flesh there without relent, scattering his attention oddly dotingly over Jesse's skin.
Jesse carded a hand through Carson's sweaty hair, the other pulling at his ass, tugging him deep inside and flexing himself around him, murmuring one more, "Let go", and Carson did just that, coming fast and hard, silent under the weight of the pleasure churning thickly through his veins, liquefying his muscles in its intensity, in the crashing waves of ecstasy and sex, molten and shrouding.
His arms trembled with the onslaught of exhaustion, and his lips were pursed, turning white with the strength of his orgasm, and the immense effort with which he was trying to hold back.
"Carson," Jesse murmured, and Carson blinked, breathing heavily, then, remembering himself, slowly pulled out and sunk down without a word, his hand and lips returning to the tip of Jesse's member, licking and sucking and massaging his boyfriend, pulling the remnants of his energy together into finishing them both off here.
Jesse met Carson's blue eyes, staring up at him from over his erection, and let the connection linger until his own eyes rolled into the back of his head at the sight and he came with a slow, harsh shudder, body contorting thrice before relaxing languidly as he deflated and Carson dragged himself up, immediately sliding back to Jesse and turning on his side so that they lay nose to nose, chest to chest, eyelashes fluttering mere centimeters from each other and flushed, heated cheeks touching softly, barely, but still, intimacy painting them in a sleepily hypnotic familiarity.
Together, they fell asleep.