(Those Wacky Amazons)
By Jim Robert Bader
(Very Loosely based on the works of Rumiko Takahashi)
"I don't suppose I could talk you out of this?" asked Toltiir in the strained tones of the long suffering and neglected.
"Excuse me?" Bacchus, the Roman God of Wine and Fertility, looked bleary-eyed in the direction of the shapeshifting Guardian Cat-God who sat perched near to the Well of Mimir.
"Using the Well to create a new alternate timeline," Toltiir replied, "Seems like everyone else is using it these days, even though the Bet's been over for at least a cycle."
"Is that right?" Bacchus considered the point, then hiccuped, "Actually I was just looking for the vomitorium so I could get back to the party, but now that you mention it that sounds like fun."
Toltiir covered his metaphorical eyes with an equally metaphorical pair of paws. Great, now he was even giving them the idea to play around with the timefield! He should have known better than to suspect a drunken sot like Bacchus to come here with a plan. It was the time of the Bacchanalia, the Olympian equivalent of Marti Gras, and they currently were sharing a feast with some Vanir and Aesir drinking buddies in Valhalla. No doubt the Wine God had wandered off and gotten himself as lost as a Hibiki, and his winding up near the pool had just been a fluke or a random whim of fate...proof positive that some whiffs were better off not being down wind of.
"So, that's the Well, huh?" Bacchus leaned forward and nearly lost his balance, weaving about like a master of the "Drunken Fist" style (which he was) before steadying himself a bit, then regaining enough focus to gaze down into the Well and see what manifested. Because he was a bit off, instead of the relative present it was the less recent past he wound up calling up, and before his eyes he saw a young man wearing a turban around his balding head, somewhat pudgy and heavy-set but no where near as fat as he would become in later decades.
"Hey," Bacchus waved his ever-full wine-cup at the vision he beheld, "Who's the handsome stud? Looks a little like me when I was a few thousand years younger."
"That?" Toltiir was aghast, "His name is Saotome Genma and he's from the Islands of Japan."
"Good looking dude," Bacchus belched, "Is he some kinda wrestler?"
"Close enough," Toltiir sighed, "He's also a sneaky, thieving, cowardly back-
stabbing weasel with the morals of a skunk and the principles of a Used Chariot dealer. He drinks too much, brags about his manhood, runs from even the slightest hint of danger and lets himself be bullied around by his sword-toting wife and Pan-perverted Master..."
"I like him already," Bacchus beamed, "I can really identify with a guy like that. Give me heroes who know when to party and when to fight, not like Heracules and his always picking fights where he's not really wanted..."
"Right," Toltiir rolled his eyes, "Of course you would...what was I thinking?"
"This guy's got quite a life ahead of him," Bacchus mused, "Living under the stars, carefree as a Nymph, not a care in the world and...Hubba, Hubba! Who's the cute chick with the purple hair?"
"Her?" Toltiir scanned, "Oh. Her name's Comb and she's from a tribe of Amazons known as the Joketsuzoku..."
"One of Arte's little girl scouts?" Bacchus leered like a drunken Satyr, "What a Maenad I could make out of that honey! Hey, who's the other chick with the horns, wings, fangs and a tail?"
"Hibiki Atsuko," Toltiir replied, not liking where this conversation was headed, "She was Comb's primary rival for Genma's affections before he finally settled down with a lady by the name of Nodoka..."
"Three cuties this guy's got lined up?" Bacchus exclaimed, "Man, what a lucky dude! I wonder if...OOPS!"
"Oops?" Toltiir repeated, then saw the fleck of foam spill off the God's cup and land in the pool, creating immediate ripples, to which the Cat-god said, "Oh Frak!"
"Ah...maybe nobody will notice?" Bacchus asked with a sheepish expression.
"Oh, they'll notice it all right," Toltiir replied with grim fatalism, "Just look..."
"DIE!" Kho-Hom cried fiercely as she lunged for the annoying man who dared avoid being skewered by her sword. This spawn of Happosai was making a mockery out of the Tribal Champion of the Joketsuzoku and she would not stand for it, especially seeing as how he refused to strike back, as if he did not take the threat she posed him seriously, which was an affront to her pride and not to be tolerated!
Genma was backing away trying furiously to avoid this savage madwoman, having not a clue as to why she was trying to gut him in the first place. If she were merely one of those people inconvenienced by the Master he would understand her anger, but why take it out on him, his Master's student? It was not like Genma wanted people to chase after him and Soun all of the time, it was simply their perverted Master's notion of training!
As terrified as he was of being run through by a Chinese straight sword, Genma was loathe to hit a woman, that being one of the few of his principles that he had managed to keep possession of after years of grueling training with the Master. Hitting a woman was just so...unmanly, and no way would Genma ever allow himself to sink to that level! Find a way of discouraging this purple haired girl without actually hurting her was bound to be a challenge, but far better than to damn what was left of his soul by turning into that lowest of all human slime, a woman-beater!
Comb had been backing him up towards the stream in the belief that the flowing water would cut off his line of escape. In a moment she would lunge forward again and he would dodge her by moving to one side, and her own momentum would do the trick of sending her into the water, a technical defeat but not decisive enough for Genma to have claimed the credit since Comb would have defeated herself. That was how it was in the original parent reality that was common to most Ranma timelines that conformed to these circumstances.
Now, however, a fleck of divine foam came floating down to land on the head of an unsuspecting Genma, who reacted to the sudden wave of intoxication by falling backwards on his kiester. As Comb lunged for him he rolled onto his back and his feet encountered her undefended stomach, and her momentum did the rest as she went toppling head-over-heels into the water, the wind momentarily driven from her sails as stunned surprise did the rest.
"Whoof!" Genma rolled up to a sitting position, "Hope that cools her down. How ya doin', Tendo-kun? Y'need a hand?"
"Eh?" Soun momentarily took his eyes off the woman who was currently fighting him, and in that moment of distraction another Amazon named Silk rushed forward with her staff in hand, intending to club this fleet-footed man into submission.
Only you didn't get to be the apprentice of the most perverted Martial Arts Master in all Japan by being totally careless. Soun's distraction was only momentary, and the sense of threat that flared up within him set his automatic reflexes into full gear so that without thinking about it he caught the staff with one arm and turned his body to the side, throwing the Amazon over his hip and into the very tree that she had been backing him up against, which knocked her momentarily senseless.
By the time Soun realized what he had done it was too late to do anything but apologize to the woman, which he did profusely, horrified at the realization that he had unintentionally brought injury to a woman. Genma saw this and nodded in sympathy, then turned back to regard the stream in which he saw the woman's body floating. He blinked his eyes twice to make certain it was not an illusion, and then the thought entered his head that he had hit her much too hard and his attacker was, in fact, drowning!
Without pausing to think about it he waded out into the stream and fished her body out to the side, relieved to hear her gasp for breath the moment her face cleared the water...
"Oboy," Toltiir faintly murmured.
"What's wrong?" Bacchus asked, "The Chick's okay, just had the wind knocked out of her a bit. Look, see how grateful she is? She putting her arms around him and kissing him. Same with the other chick, which I guess means everything's all right between the guys and girls, huh?"
"You don't know the half of it," Toltiir sighed, then spotted another figure hanging back further into the woods and murmured to himself, "There's gonna be trouble..."
Atsuko was enraged as she saw the purple haired hussy who was putting the moves on HER target mortal! Here she had tracked down this Saotome Genma guy like her mother wanted her to, only to see him fight with some top-heavy broad with a pig-sticker, but the moment he beat her she changed her tune and started putting the guy in a lip lock! Hell, she was even calling him her husband now! How dare she stake a claim on the guy Atsuko was supposed to lay to produce a Nexus!
Well, two could play at the same game, and no way was she going to play second fiddle to Silicone enhanced Chinese floozy! Her Momma wanted her to get a child off the guy, and that's what Atsuko intended to do, even if she had to walk over the body of her new rival to do it...!
"Whoah," Bacchus said, "Guess that horny chicks not too cool about sharing, huh?"
"She'll get over it...eventually," Toltiir shook his furry head from side to side and tched about the now-messed-up timeframe, "Atsuko's not really a Martial Artist at this point, and when she challenges Comb she gets her ass kicked but royal. That motivates her to seek training from a number of martial arts masters, Genma included, and then she joins the school of the One Righteous Fist and learns some special techniques that make her more competitive with Comb, who also has to train to keep her edge as a fighter. Originally Comb gave up on Genma and went back to China to become a doctor, but now she thinks of him as her husband and there's no way she can go back without him. It's convincing him to move back with her to her village is the real problem, but apparently she manages to do it after a year of coaxing. By that time Atsuko's managed to get herself with child by Genma, but only after he's already conceived a child in Comb who will be the actual Nexus named Ranma."
"And the other dude?" Bacchus wondered.
"He elects to remain in Japan, and rather than be parted from him, Silk becomes his official wife and they move into his family house to assume control over the dojo. Curious...this causes Kimiko to wind up marrying...I don't believe it! Kuno Godai? She becomes the mother to Tatewaki and Kodachi, then she dies tragically a decade later, leaving her husband and children to grieve...only later he takes up with Nodoka? She becomes the step mother to the Kuno siblings and encourages them to grow up to become young warriors who embody those "virtues" she sees as fitting for both men and women?"
"Cool dude," Bacchus grinned, "And what about my Main Man, Genma?"
"Just have a look," Toltiir sighed, scanning ahead to a certain Amazon village...
"Honestly," growled a young man named Ran-Ma, aged seventeen, as he gathered firewood for his house, effortlessly chopping through logs with the tips of his fingers to make them the right size for a stove-lit fire, "Pop never does his share of the work any more! How am I supposed to keep up on my training if I have to do all the washing, cooking and sewing?"
"You complain too much, Big Brother," Xian-Pu responded while working on her katas, "There's not that much to do around the house, and besides...you're a better cook than father."
"There's a lot of things I'm better at than him," Ranma snorted, "Him and his stupid ideas about training missions..."
Shampoo silently agreed with her brother that their father lacked a certain something when it came to having the good sense of a warthog, and how either of them could have allowed themselves to be convinced that training in Jusenkyo was a good idea she would never truly fathom. At least her curse had given her the means of learning the powerful Nekoken (without referring to that stupid handbook their father used to carry around with him of forbidden Amazon techniques) which had improved her fighting skills a hundred fold. Ranma, on the other hand...well...the village liked to joke about what he turned into, but she thought he looked very cute as a girl, and while their Mother wasn't exactly pleased by all this, she saw it as a perfect excuse to train Ranma in proper techniques for a young warrior...even if officially Ranma was actually a Healer in training.
"At least you don't have to worry about the festival next month," Shampoo replied as she thrust with her bonbori at a dozen imaginary opponents, beating them all into submission, "Great grandmother expects me to do good, but I'm not really all that certain. There are some pretty talented warriors going up for the title of Champion in our age group."
"Ah, you'll beat the snot out of them," Ranma said confidently as he lined up another block of wood, then calmly studied it for weak stress points before his hands became a blur and reduced the block to much smaller kindling, "Even Ambergris and Perfume can't hold a candle to you, Sis, and as for Cabinet...well, she's strong, but you're way lots more pretty."
Despite herself Shampoo could not help smiling. Her brother could be quite the charmer when he wanted to be, and she wondered for the nine thousandth time why he never stated a preference for any of the girls in the village. More than a few she knew would have willingly thrown a fight for the right to date him, but Ranma was much too intense and scholarly a fellow to allow himself to be distracted by possible romance. He was easily the best male fighter in their village, and almost as good as herself, even if he did not officially have a warrior's title.
"Getting overconfident won't help me with my training," Shampoo declared as she tossed her bonbori into the air, leaped high and performed a perfect spinning kick before landing with great ease and catching her maces before they could touch the ground, "Besides, Father does have a point when he says that further training can only improve a warrior's edge. You never know when one of the Elders may decide to teach some secret technique to their own family favorites."
"I still say you got the problem licked," Ranma spared a moment to give his little sister a wry grin, "In a manner of speaking."
Shampoo caught the reference and stuck her tongue out in his direction.
"So that's where you two got off to!" declared their little sister, Xian-Ma, who just then stumbled upon them coming out from their village, "Mom and Dad say you gotta hightail your butts back to the house, they've got some kind of an announcement to make about some strangers Mom says are coming to our village."
"Strangers, Little Pony?" Ranma turned to regard his other sister.
"Yeah," Shanma replied, "From some place called Japan, which I think is where Dad originally came from. An old friend of his and Mom's is coming to pay us a visit and they want you there when they arrive at our village. Don't ask me about anything else because I'm just as much in the dark as you two."
"That is odd," Shampoo exchanged glances with Ranma, "I wonder who these strangers are?"
"Who knows," Ranma shrugged, "I suppose we'll find out in another few minutes..."
"Oh no," Toltiir remarked to himself, "It can't be...!"
Genma clutched the post card in his hands and wept openly as he declared, "At last...after all these years...we'll finally be reunited, just as we were in the old days!"
"I know," Comb smiled affectionately at her husband, the memory rising up in her of an incident many years back when she and Silk had said their mutual fare wells, getting good and drunk at a party honoring their mutual engagements as Silk was the first one to officially be married. It had taken Comb another year further to drag her Genma to the altar, but the wait proved more than worth it, which was what had made the event such an emotional tear-jerker...and then she and Silk had made that half-drunken promise about having their heirs face off to decide which of them had the stronger offspring...
"You're sure they'll be here at any time?" Genma asked for the fourth time in an hour.
"I'm sure," Comb replied tartly, not blaming her husband for being more than a bit anxious, "Our scouts are escorting them to our gates even as we speak, and soon Silk and Soun will be here, along with their children. I just hope our Children get here before they do."
"Soun doesn't say too much about who he's bringing along with him," Genma studied the card once again, "He mentions something about coming along with another family...the Kunos. You remember Kuno Godai, don't you?"
"How could I forget?" Comb rolled her eyes in the memory of a certain scissors wielding neat-grooming fanatic and the woman he wound up marrying, who used to be a rival for her husband. She wondered if Nodoka's offspring were also good warriors, and if they would make a good showing during festival? It would be such delicious triumph to see Shampoo stomp one of Nodoka's children into the dirt, and then that stuck-up snob would know which warrior was the better mother...!
"Who are the kids again?"
"Let me check," Toltiir remarked, "Well, well...same batch as the last time...the protocols department must be insisting on having the same players no matter which combination of parents go into the genetic mixture. This time, though, the twins were raised together, both Kasumi and Kachu, and just like before their personalities are a mixture of Nice Girl and Angry Girl...Yin and Yang were never so much fun!"
"What about the other two?" Bacchus asked, "Like the girl with the bowl cut, but that little cutie beside her's got something...I dunno...kinda special..."
"Nabiki and Akane?" Toltiir blinked his eyes, "Well now...there are some differences here...Akane's no where near as wild and angry...almost mellow by standards, and Nabiki's less of a mercenary, no doubt because she doesn't have to carry the financial weight of the household on her shoulders. Her father never stopped teaching students in the dojo, and Nabiki's a financial manager who's managed to turn the place into a positive asset. Wonder which of them's gonna wind up with Saotome?"
"Who cares?" Bacchus sniffed, "Marriage is Juno's thing, and who's the babe with the pony tail?"
"Kodachi?" Toltiir blinked, "Oh my...this really is something..."
"Are we there yet, Mom?" Akane asked as she stretched her arms to keep her shoulders limber on the long walk up the mountain trail.
"We're almost there, Akane dear," Silk replied to her faithful little troop of family members, smiling indulgently at her youngest child's impatience, "Another three kilometers and we should be at the gates of my home village."
"I hope your family will be well disposed to receive me," Soun admitted as he adjusted the straps to his backpack, "I don't mind confessing to you that I'm as nervous as a schoolboy. I keep wondering if anyone besides your grandmother will like me."
"I'm sure they'll see what a fine catch I made with you, husband," Silk nodded, then cast an amused glance to the side before adding, "Come along, Kodachi...you can study the local flora all you like after we've settled in to my family house."
"Eh?" the studious looking girl replied as she adjusted her sun-glasses and gave a shy look to her traveling companion, "I was just about to comment on what a rare specimen of the family of Hibiscus I've just discovered here this close to the Bayankalah mountain range. A magnificent find, wouldn't you say, Ukyo-san?"
"Ah..." replied the girl dressed in masculine clothing, "If you say so, Kodachi-
chan. I really wouldn't know as much about that stuff as you, I'm afraid."
Kodachi picked a flower and offered it to the Tomboyish girl and smiled radiantly, "It would look good in your hair if you will indulge me the privilege of placing it there myself."
Ukyo stared at the flower, then at the girl before her, took the flower in her hand and instead pinned it to Kodachi's hair over one ear and smiled, "Thanks...but I think it would look much nicer in your hair, Kodachi-chan."
Akane gave a smirk towards her two best friends as she enjoyed their flirting, which was better than any soap opera, only to wince as Tatewaki sprang up beside her with a hand-full of freshly picked wild flowers.
"Ignore my poor, misguided sibling as she mistakes one of her own kind for the opposite gender. Instead accept from me this token gift of my affections for thy radiance, sweet Akane..."
"Get a grip, Kuno," Akane growled, and used the boy's position to grab him by the wrist and flip him end-over-end, only to see him catch himself nimbly on his feet as he rolled with the tumble.
"Methinks she doth protest too much," Kuno remarked as he straightened himself out, easily turning about with the flowers still gripped in one hand, "One day you will receive me with less hostility, sweet Akane...you may mark me well on this, for I am nothing if not persistent."
"Nothing if not clueless," Akane stomped on ahead, ignoring the pleading looks the boy turned in her direction.
Tatewaki sighed, wondering what next he should try to impress upon the girl he desired that he was a man worthy of her affections.
Nodoka smiled in spite of her foster son's lack of success. Tatewaki was a man well groomed and persistent in pursuing his affections, a son a mother could be well proud of, and one of these days perhaps Akane would be persuaded to see him in a different light. And if not her, then there were other Tendo sisters who might make him a fine wife, either the twins or Nabiki, fine women who could give her grandsons, which was all she had ever asked of the Kami.
"Maybe I can pretend we're not related," Nabiki murmured under her breath as she gave an amused smirk to the antics of her companions.
"Don't put too much stock in such affairs, Apprentice," the old woman at her side remarked, "You love them well, and some day they may surprise you..."
"Another Lore Master episode?" Toltiir sniffed, "Well, those are always good for a few laughs, but I wonder where the rest of the cast is in all of this mess? Hmmm..." he made a slight adjustment to the fine tuning of the Well and called up the sight of Ranma laboring under a huge pile of chopped up wood that he was carrying back to his village...
"...Man's work is never done, she says," Ranma sniffed, "I'd like to see either one of them do an honest day's work for once! All they do is train to fight, but lift a finger to help their poor brother with his daily chores...?"
All at once Ranma's senses came alert and he reacted by vaulting high, tossing his cargo of wood high in the air even as the space where he had been standing was filled with the whipping crack of chains that would have wrapped around him had he continued unaware. He kept possession of two stalks of wood that he used to deflect a number of sharpened objects hurled at him as if with lethal intent, and then he alighted on a fence with one foot poised to balance him over the ground as he waited for his attacker to reveal himself, which naturally he did, hurling a weighted net in his direction.
"Give it up already, Mousse!" Ranma snorted as he deflected the net and avoided the tri-fork that sought to nail him, "You give yourself away every time! At this rate you're never gonna catch my sister napping!"
"Can't blame a man for trying, Ranma!" Mousse sprang into view sporting a pair of Sai Swords, "Shampoo says I can challenge her on the day I defeat you, so I'm going to keep working out until I'm good enough to be her husband!"
"Ah, one thing first you have to do," Ranma pointed up in the air, "Duck."
"Duck?" Mousse frowned, "What do you mean by...?"
That was when gravity asserted itself and the pile of wood that Ranma had tossed into the air came raining down from the sky...exactly where the half-blind martial artist was standing. Mousse barely had time to yelp before he was half-
buried under the woodpile.
Ranma heaved a sigh. His best friend was way too predictable some days! He vaulted off the fence and went to offer his assistance, telling himself all the while that it was for the sake of training, and that getting beat up like this would toughen Mousse for the real abuse he would experience at the hands of his sister.
"You're pathetic, you know that?" Ranma asked as he got Mousse back on his feet then stooped to begin regathering the wood he had discarded, "How do you expect to defeat my sister if you keep making the same mistakes over and over?"
"I don't know," Mousse wobbled a bit as he tried to decide which of three blurry blobs was the real Ranma, "But I won't stop trying! Shampoo will be mine one day, mark me well, Ranma!"
"Yeah, yeah, yeah..." Ranma sniffed, only to look up in surprise as someone new walked into the clearing, "Who's that?"
"Oh," Mousse recalled his original purpose for seeking Ranma out, "I met him on the edge of the village...he says his name is Hibiki Ryoga...I think he's from your father's country."
"Ah...hi," the wild-looking boy with the headband bowed politely, "I was wondering if you could help me...is this the Forbidden Forest that's supposed to be in this part of China?"
"No, but you're close," Ranma straightened out with only half his burden of wood in his arms, "It's about two days in that direction. Just head for the falls and hang a right, you can't miss it."
"I already have," the boy looked mildly apologetic, "Four times so far. The place must be under a spell, every time I think I'm close to finding the place it disappears and I wind up somewhere far away. I need a guide, someone who knows the area and won't be afraid to take me."
"I suppose we might be able to find somebody to help you," Ranma replied, "But why do you want to go there? The Elders say the place is off limits to Amazons, that's why they call it Forbidden."
"I have to go there," Ryoga replied, "I-I can't tell you why, but I'm on a quest, and it's very important I find the place. I made a promise to my mother...that's all I can tell you about it."
"It sounds like a worthwhile cause, whatever it is," Mousse said, "Do you think the Elders would authorize such a mission?"
"I don't really know," Ranma replied, "You know how tight-lipped great-
grandmother can be, and the only one allowed to go there is Perfume, but I don't think she's any more eager than most guys on account of the place being Haunted."
"Haunted?" Ryoga asked, "By what?"
"Y'know, I don't really know," Ranma frowned, "We used to play on the edge of the haunted woods as kids before the Elders put a stop to that. I've always wanted to find out what everyone's so afraid of...maybe this is a good time to find out. Tell you want, I gotta go stop by the house on account of my Parents, but if you hang around I could look you up later, then Mousse and me can take you close to the forest and you can do your business without interference."
"Thanks...whoever you are," the Lost Boy smiled a grateful smile, "I'd be in your debt if you could do that."
"Name's Ranma," Ranma replied, "Saotome Ranma, son of Comb and Genma of the Matriarch's clan. Mousse, keep him out of trouble and I'll be back in about one candle lick, okay?"
"Sure thing," Mousse replied, "I'll take him by my place and have my Uncle cook us up a meal. Sorry about the firewood."
"Don't sweat it," Ranma said as he began picking up more wood with his feet, propelling them up onto the stack he already carried as he added, "Just remember to be less predictable next time. How do you expect me to keep in training if I can always see you coming?"
As the pig-tailed boy gathered up the remaining logs and headed off towards his parent's house, Ryoga blinked his eyes in delayed reaction and said, "Saotome? Could it be...? Naw! What am I thinking...?"
"Hooboy," Toltiir winced, "The Dramatic Ironies Department must really be working overtime on this one..."
"Children," Comb said with great sobriety as she indicated the row of strangers sitting down opposite them in their modestly sized house, "These guests are from Japan, and the head of their clan is my good friend, Silk. Due to the barbaric customs of her adopted country she has taken the family name of her husband, Tendo Soun, but make no mistake, she is a true Amazon and maintains our traditions, which she has passed along to her children."
"Thank you for your warm hospitality and the compliment you just paid me, Comb-
chan," Silk replied, "But in respect to some of our party, I think we should conduct the rest of this conversation in Japanese, if that is agreeable. You have taught your children to speak in your husband's native language, correct?"
"Of course," Comb nodded, indicating her offspring, "This is Ran-Ma, my oldest, who is an apprenticed Healer, and Xian-Pu, my oldest daughter and a warrior in training, and this is Xian-Ma, my youngest daughter, who hasn't yet decided what she wants to be, but she's in training anyway, ask grandmother for details because she really hasn't seen fit to tell me."
The representatives of the Tendo, Kuno and Kuonji clans all studied the three youths sitting together in a row from the dark haired oldest male to his purple haired younger sister and the blue haired youngest sibling, all of whom returned the regard of these foreign strangers with frank curiosity plain in their expressions.
"And these are my children," Silk said by way of making introductions, "My oldest pair are Kachu and Kasumi, the former who is in training as an Apprenticed Demon hunter, the latter is studying to become a Mage practicing White Magic. My middle daughter, Nabiki, is an apprenticed Lore Master, while my youngest, Akane, is a Warrior in training."
"Nihao," said Shampoo, eyes sparkling with interest, an interest returned by Akane, who was sizing her up as a potential sparring partner.
"Likewise," replied Nabiki, who was sizing up Ranma for reasons that had nothing to do with the boy's combat potential.
"And of course," Silk turned to the rest of their party, "You all would know my grandmother, Elder Lotion, who is training my middle daughter. And this is my good friend, Kuno Nodoka, and her two children, Tatewaki and Kodachi. Tachi is studying his mother's art of Ken-Jitsu to follow in the footsteps of his Samurai forefathers. Kodachi is a student of Botany who is studying Herbal Medicine and is mastering the art of Rhythmic Gymnastics. Lastly-but by no means the least of our party-is Kuonji Ukyo, a good friend of Kodachi's who decided to come along to broaden her horizons. Ukyo is a master of the Kuonji style of Anything-Goes Okonomiyaki cooking and ranks as a Master Chef in spite of her tender years. She has also studied Kempo, Shotokan Karate and the art of Ninjutsu, holding a high degree of proficiency in each of these systems."
"Charmed," Ukyo nodded.
"Indeed," agreed Kodachi, her girlfriend.
"Deeply honored," said Tatewaki with a slight bow of his head.
"Ah...Nihao?" said Kasumi in a hesitant voice.
"May our stay bring great honor to your and your house," said Kachu with far more resolution.
"Interesting," Comb nodded, "And well met. I can see you've been keeping yourself busy during your stay in Japan...may I take it you have kept your edge in other affairs?"
"Anytime you wish to test my skills, I am more than ready," Silk nodded, smiling slyly.
Comb turned to her own family and said, "Silk and her group will be staying with us in the Guest House until Grandmother gets back from her own trip abroad. You are to treat them as Clan-sisters and allies for the duration, and all sparring will be kept to a friendly level...no official challenges until Silk and I give our permission."
"You haven't forgotten about our agreement, then," Silk noted with approval.
"How could I forget?" Comb grinned back, "I've been training Shampoo to be every bit as good as I was at her age, perhaps even better. I take it you've been grooming your youngest for the same purpose?"
"What purpose is that, Mother?" asked Kachu, who ranked as the oldest by a good twenty minutes.
"You'll find out soon enough," Silk replied with a serene expression, "But for now I think everyone should settle in and make yourselves at home. I'll be looking up my own haunts soon enough and there may be room in Grandmother's house to accommodate at least half of our number, so we'll work out more semi-
permanent arrangements for later."
"How long will we be staying, Mother?" Kasumi asked in an eerie echo of her twin sister.
"Three months should be sufficient for you to get fully acquainted with your ancestral roots here in China," Silk replied, "It will also give those of you not yet proficient in Chinese a chance to brush up on your Mandarin, though I want to caution you in advance not to get into any fights with the locals...you know that Amazons have special rules for dealing with outsiders."
"Yeah, we know," Akane made a face, "But why should we count as outsiders? We're just as much Amazons as any of you."
"You think so?" Shampoo smiled the more deeply, looking forward to testing the boastful claims of this particular outsider.
"Now Akane," Nodoka chided, "You'll have your chance to play with the other young ladies of your mother's village, so try to be a bit more patient. I've told Tatewaki that he should be mindful of his own manners and not provoke any girls into making a challenge since he is bound to be of great interest to the women here, and it would not do for him to get engaged before he has successfully wooed you."
"Like that'll ever happen?" Akane rolled her eyes towards the ceiling.
"Be not so quick to dismiss Kuno Tatewaki, fair Akane," the boy in question smiled, "I have not yet begun to woo thy fair flower of womanhood, and perhaps one day soon I will impress on you the worthiness of my petition."
Shampoo and Ranma shifted uncomfortably and shared a mutually puzzled expression, while at their side Shanma murmured, "Who'd have ever believed Mousse could have relatives living in Japan..."
While the women chatted over family matters their respective husbands were watching each other from the sidelines, both having been cautioned that it was not a Man's place to handle such important business in Amazon society, though reassured that their opinions would be valued at some later point in the conversation.
However, each man was smiling as he sized the other up, for both had been students of the same perverted master, and as such they yearned to test each other in combat for old time's sake. Soun had continued his training with the Master until he and Silk had put a stop to such affairs by burying the old coot in a cave after getting him good and drunk on a keg of sake. Genma had enjoyed reading about that in their regular correspondences by mail and would gladly had taken part in the affair, if he could have managed to get away from his wife long enough to pursue this.
For his part Genma had been studying Amazon methods for the better part of twenty years and counted himself the best male warrior of his generation. He wasn't expected to do much around the house, but he had been encouraging his son to train with their Grandmother on the pretext that no weak boy should be tolerated within the house of the Nyanchiczu Matriarch. Even before acquiring his curse, Ranma had been accounted as good as most of the female warriors in the tribe while being head and shoulders above any male fighter in his age group. Cologne was very fond of her eldest great grandchild and had encouraged the boy to work out regularly along with his sisters...in between his various chores, of course, being infinitely better at cooking and cleaning than either of his parents or his two sisters.
Unknown to their wives, however, Soun and Genma had their own private agreement, one they planned on springing on their mutual families at the appropriate time and place. Before leaving Japan, Genma had pledged to Soun that they would one day unite their houses, which meant that Ranma would have to defeat one of Soun's girls in order to marry her. From the looks of things the boy would have a good crop of potential fiancees to choose from, and the only question was which girl would get to do the official honors.
It was angling to have the boy utter such a challenge, or to provoke one, that would cause them the most troubles for Ranma was far too amiable and laid back to accept the petitions from the various girls of the village who wanted to fight with him for the right to date him. Ranma was clever enough not to let himself be roped into such affairs while he was still too busy studying the arts of combat and healing to space the time for romance and other such distractions. It was not that he lacked an interest in girls, of course, but he just did not find any of the young warriors in their tribe as interesting as his own sister, Shampoo being his ideal of what an Amazon should be like, a feeling that was reciprocated on her part though neither one was comfortable with the unspoken implications.
Still he had to admit to himself that these Tendo girls were a novelty that would take some getting used to, especially the twins, that sly Nabiki girl and the fierce-looking Akane, to say nothing of the other two young ladies present, the shy Kodachi and her warrior-chef companion. All six of these girls were of great interest for the breath of novelty that they each brought with them. Ranma quietly wondered if Mousse might take an interest in one of these girls, which would give Shampoo great peace of mind, and that Tatewaki guy looked like he might be good for some free-sparring. On the whole he found himself actually looking forward to getting to know them each on a personal basis, and the sooner they were settled into the tribe would be for the better in his opinion...
"That poor boy has no idea what he's getting into," Toltiir shook his head in no little dismay.
"Well, can you blame him?" Bacchus asked reasonably, "Living a sheltered life like that among a bunch of Diana-wannabes? The problem with Amazons is they just don't know how to have fun, all that training to be warrior Jocks does something to their hormone levels, or something like that..."
"Could be," Toltiir said non-committaly, "Now this is curious...the boys are going in search of that temple, and look who's decided to tag along with them...?"
"...Are you sure we should be doing this?" asked Rol-Lar of his friends as they made their way to the edge of the forbidden forest, "We're gonna get ourselves in some real trouble..."
"You wanted to come along, you knew the risks," Ranma replied with a shrug.
"You didn't tell me it would be something like this," Roller glanced back at the curious group of girls and the outsider male who insisted on following them on a nominal tour of the countryside, his interest piqued by the ones named Nabiki and Akane, and the other pair called Ukyo and Kodachi. These foreign names were so strange on the tongue, but the girls seemed nice enough in their way, not that he intended to voice such thoughts aloud for fear of getting his ears boxed for his troubles.
"He has a point, Ranma," Mousse noted in a low murmur, "A party this size is bound to attract the wrong sort of attention."
"Look," Ranma sighed, "I already told you guys that I made a deal with Mom that I would look after these outlanders in exchange for being released from the rest of my chores for the day. A good thing the older girls decided to stay and make house or this group would be even larger than it is, and you know what my sisters would say if they found out what I was up to."
"How much longer until we get there?" asked Ryoga, who found himself eyeing these Japanese girls with more interest than even he thought proper. That Akane was by far the cutest in his opinion, but each of the other girls came well recommended and was worth a closer study. Too bad that middle girl seemed to have already formed an interest in Ranma, while Ukyo and Kodachi seemed only interested in each other.
"Not too much farther," Ranma reassured the odd boy who seemed so familiar for some odd reason, "We're almost where Mousse and me used to play when we were children."
"Interesting," mused Nabiki, sensing an opening to interject herself into the conversation, "Would you mind telling us more on why this place is called the Forbidden Forest?"
"Ah...well..." Ranma found himself oddly put off his guard by this short-
haired and inquisitive girl who reminded him a little too much of Ambergris, with her probing mind always full of odd questions, and to cover for this he decided to shift the conversation back to Japanese, "It gets that name because there are all sorts of legends and rumors about the place, stuff the Elders tell us kids to frighten us off, I guess..."
"They also say the place is haunted," Roller expressed in a more nervous voice, "They say a demon sleeps here and that bad things happen to the unwary..."
"You mean supernatural things reside within these woods?" Kodachi asked nervously.
"Well, that all depends on what you mean by supernatural," Mousse responded.
"Is it dangerous?" Akane asked, flexing her hands to loosen them up before balling them into fists while eyeing the darkened woods as if expecting some kind of hidden danger.
"Dangerous?" Ranma replied, "Well, no...uh...compared with what?"
Nabiki found herself all the more amused with this handsome Chinese boy, who reminded her in odd ways of their family physician, Doctor Tofu. There was something charmingly honest and yet na ve about this "Wild Horse" that piqued her interest, or at least moreso than any boy she had known back in Nerima.
Akane was mildly disgusted with her older sister's flirtatious behavior, after all, he was just a boy, not all that different from the boys who were always challenging her at her High School, ever since Tatewaki had put the word around that-as an Amazon-Akane would have to date a boy who could defeat her in combat. That shy and retiring act didn't fool her in the slightest, though so far this Ranma character had not yet made any moves on her sister. She would wait and see what-if anything-happened between them, but if the boy started acting like a pervert...well, she knew how to deal with upstart men who dared think themselves above young Amazon women.
Mousse had also been noticing the females in their group and was admiring them (to the extent that his visual limitations would permit) though finding not a one of them held a candle to Shampoo, the true object of his obsessions. He had been training hard in the hopes of one day winning her affections, and so far his efforts seemed to be paying off as Shampoo did not tell him to drop dead anymore with near as much intensity, especially as he had been honing his skills against her brother instead of her, allowing Shampoo more time for her own training.
He knew she was gradually coming around to seeing him as more than just a target for occasional beatings, ever since she had uttered her challenge, which Mousse had gladly accepted, "The day you can beat my brother in an honest fight is the day you can challenge me!" Of course some in the village wrongfully interpreted that as an insult, even those who knew how skilled Ranma was in warrior craft, and so surprisingly adept for someone in training to be a Healer.
Any other boy their age who was as close to Shampoo would have been a target of Mousse's angry retributions, but Ranma was different from the other young Amazon males in that he never judged Mousse a weakling and stood by the half-blind boy when others dared to taunt him. Ranma was someone Mousse could confide in with perfect confidence that his secrets would not be divulged to anyone else, for Ranma had a kind of honor that most Amazons found strange, that Japanese Bushido of his, which forbade revealing the weaknesses of even an opponent to other warriors. Ranma was odd in a lot of ways...such as his refusal to accept challenges and dates, but Mousse got along with him well enough and had to admit that life would be a lot less interesting if Shampoo's older brother were not within the picture.
He wasn't sure what to make of this Kuno Tatewaki boy who was so blatantly hitting on and harassing the girl named Akane. If he liked the girl why didn't he just challenge her to a fight as it was obvious that the youngest Tendo girl was a warrior who could dish it out and take it in equal measure. Mousse could sympathize with this Kuno for the way he could handle abuse, but it was more than a little obvious that Akane was not interested in returning his affections, and couldn't he get a clue about that? Honestly, some young men just did not know how to take a hint from a lady...
The party at last came to the edge of the Forbidden forest, at which point they paused to take stock of the matter. Those unfamiliar with this hidden valley nestled deep within the Bayankalah range were obviously put off by the forbidding look of the place, and the ominous black-winged shapes circling in the air as if waiting for the unwary to dare trespass beyond these borders.
"That's the Forbidden forest?" Nabiki asked in wary apprehension, "I have a very bad feeling about this..."
"Know what you mean, Sugar," Ukyo remarked, "All it needs if Frankenstein's castle to make the setting perfect."
"Oh my," mused Kodachi, "I wonder what specimens of plant life would be found in there?"
"Surely no wholesome thing would grow in such ominous surroundings," Tatewaki remarked, equally disturbed (he would have denied that it was fear) by the sense that unnatural things grew wild within the dark velvet demesne.
"It doesn't look that awful," Akane tried to sound nonchalant and failed rather badly.
"It doesn't matter," Ryoga squared his shoulders and said, "I still have to go in there to complete my mission."
"Hey, wait a moment," Ranma noticed that the boy was starting to move forward, "You really mean to go in there? But it could be dangerous..."
"Yeah," Roller noted, "They don't call it the forbidden forest for nothing."
"How much do they charge?" Nabiki asked, though even she found her jest weak and not very convincing.
"They say whoever disturbs the sleeping demon who rests within that forest will be cursed by the Gods for all eternity," Mousse related with a hint of serious caution.
"I don't care," Ryoga said resolutely, "I made a promise to my mother and I intend to fulfil it. You guys can wait here or go home or do whatever it is you like, but I have to go in there, so don't try and talk me out of it."
The strange boy took two steps forward when Ranma said, "Ah...Ryoga...why are you going in that direction?"
"Huh?" the odd boy looked down and found that he had just left the trail and was beginning to march off at a ninety degree anger that would have carried him away from his goal, "Ah...how did that happen...?"
"That boy has some serious problems taking directions," noted Ukyo in mild sarcasm.
"Shut up!" Ryoga snapped, "It not my fault! I...I think I must be cursed or something! I don't know why but I never can find my way where I'm going!
"There, there," Kodachi said soothingly, "I'm sure it's just a condition of the surroundings. I fully understand about how easily one might be lost in strange surroundings..."
"Maybe so," Ranma sniffed, "But I for one don't got all day. C'mon, I might as well take you the rest of the way. You guys wait here and we'll try to make it fast..."
"No way, Ranma," Mousse said loyally, "If you're going then I'm going too."
"You're both gonna get into trouble," Roller warned his companions.
"Nothing unusual for me," Nabiki shrugged, "And I'd rather stick near to you guys if it's all the same to the both of you. You at least know the way back to the village."
"True enough," Ranma shrugged, "Well...then stay close but don't crowd me or get too close to Mousse. He can be a little wild at close quarters, but his aim at long range is nearly flawless..."
"Oh me, oh my," Toltiir titched, "The kids are going to wake up Ganglot. I wonder why Ryoga was sent to find his great grandmother..."
"Maybe she wants to invite her to a party?" Bacchus suggested.
Toltiir sighed, "Why do I even bother...?"
Ranma was wondering at the behavior of this girl named Nabiki, who clung to his side with such nervousness that he had trouble believing that she was an Apprenticed Lore Master. He was unused to being around girls who could not handle themselves in a fight, let alone handle a dangerous situation. In a way her cowering in his shadow reminded him a bit of Sash, the village klutz, who seemed ready to spook at even a hint of ghosts, goblins and monsters and could trip over her own two feet without a moment's notice.
Of course this Nabiki seemed calm and poised in other respects, so he allowed that her odd reaction to the Forbidden Forest was just a symptom of being raised in foreign places where things were a little different. He patiently answered her questions when prodded about some of the local phenomenon, though for the life of him he did not see why she and the rest of these foreigners were so easy to panic over perfectly normal things that any Amazon would have taken for granted.
He did wonder about the Akane girl, who alternately yelped and glared at him as if suspecting him of offering her an insult. At the moment it was the sight of the Temple itself that was causing her and the other foreigners to act as if they were in the presence of something dangerously explosive...all save for the quiet one named Kodachi, who seemed to take a more academic interest in the place, expressing fascination with the very idea that there could be a pyramid-
like structure in the middle of China.
"Do you realize the implications of this?" she expressed in rapt, almost child-
like wonder, "It's an archeological wonder of the ages, discovering a pyramid-
building civilization in this part of the world, thousands of miles from both Egyptian and Meso-American civilizations..."
"Whatever," Ranma shrugged, "As far as we know it's been here longer than even the Elders can recall, and it used to be the center of worship for some ancient culture. Legend gives the Demon Goddess a name, but most prefer to refer to her as the Sleeping Woman."
"This is a very bad idea," Roller commented, "We shouldn't be here, I just know we're gonna get in trouble..."
"That may be so," Ryoga said, "But I have no choice but to enter this pyramid and find whatever's in there for the sake of my mother, who told me it was important."
"Who is your mother anyway?" Mousse wondered, "And how in the name of the Ancestors does she know about this place?"
"I don't really know the answer to that," Ryoga replied, "But my mother's name is Hibiki Atsuko and she's in a lot of trouble. Mom told me I could find help if I found this place, now all I need to do is to find a way in there."
"That might not be such a good idea," Nabiki cautioned, staying close to Ranma under the pretext of needing his protection, "I sense strong emanations coming from within there. Whoever this Sleeping Woman is, she's obliviously very powerful and is probably better off getting her beauty sleep rather than have us disturb her."
"I'm with you, Sugar," Ukyo said, "This place gives me the creeps and there's probably a very good idea why they call it Forbidden."
"Nonsense," Kuno responded while moving forward, "Kuno Tatewaki knows not the meaning of fear..."
"That's true," Akane grumbles, "You can't even spell it."
"He also has the same problem with words like 'Discretion,'" Kodachi noted with a touch of sisterly mockery in her voice, "Also Restraint, Rationality and Reason."
"Got that right," Ukyo smirked in agreement with her girlfriend.
"Mock all you will," Tatewaki sniffed, "But I dare to go where the brave dare not, and this young man's plight has touched me so that I will endeavor to assist him in unlocking this pyramid's hidden secrets. The mere fact that this vine-encrusted structure has awaited discovery for untold ages speaks to me of its purpose being to further the standard of a hero."
"And how are you gonna do that?" Akane scoffed, "You can't even figure out how to open up a can of Miso soup without using that sword you always carry."
"Ah, do I sense a note of challenge in your voice, fair Akane?" Kuno glanced back with a smirk before starting forward again, even as Ryoga had already advanced to the first step of the pyramid's base. Without turning around Kuno asked, "What would you wager that I shall unravel this mystery within the hour? I would be willing to stake a date with thee if you should lose our wager, and grant thee a favor should you prove correct in your assertion."
"Anything I want, huh?" Akane frowned, then she took on a sly expression, "You're on."
"Sis," Nabiki stage-whispered, "Remember what I've always told you about gambling?"
"Hah, you're a fine one to talk," Akane cheerfully countered, "And aren't you the one who always urges I bet on a sure thing."
"Except that I don't think the odds are as much in your favor as you think," Nabiki warned her with an eye towards the Temple that seemed to suggest that it was about to explode at any moment.
In point of fact it did explode, but only after Ryoga ascended to the peak and examined a curious circle that was untouched by the vines and betrayed curious engravings of an occult significance, and before Nabiki could shout a warning not to the perpetually lost boy touched this circle and caused a flash of light to herald the release of the Demoness, Ganglot, who manifested in the air above the pyramid like the glory of a Goddess come to Earth...
"Well, this gets interesting," Toltiir remarked, "Ganglot tests the young warriors before revealing her basically benevolent intentions. The group is divided in their opinion of the Oni Princess with some suspecting her of hiding her true character, and a few think she's evil because she is, in fact, a Demon."
"That Ryoga dude trusts his great grandmother, though, and she makes a deal with him that creates an alliance with the boy being her Mortal link to the physical plane," Bacchus took a sip from his wineglass, "Kinda makes ya feel warm all over, seein' family get along like that..."
Toltiir considered the source and decided not to offer comment on that subject, instead taking notice of something infinitely more interesting, "Seems Cologne doesn't take well to the awakening of her Sister-in-law and tries to recontain the Oni using the power of the twins, Kachu and Kasumi. Demon Hunter and White Magic combine to test the limits of Ganglot's illusion power, but in the end the Oni wins the fight. Akane's ticked off about losing her bet with Kuno, however, and gets riled at the sight of Nabiki getting closer to Ranma. She challenges the boy and that's when the fun really starts to happen..."
Ranma tensed as he sensed the oncoming attack of the youngest Tendo girl and moved to avoid her, easily side-stepping the assault, which sent Akane sprawling into some bushes, much to the latter's intense irritation.
"Excuse me," Ranma said, trying to defuse the situation, "But I'd rather not fight with you..."
"Oh yeah?" Akane's temper suddenly flared as she tore herself free from the bushes literally seeing red, and hearing only condescension from the older boy, which caused her pride to surge with the intent of beating him senseless...
"Hooboy," Toltiir winced, "Ranma's forced to defend himself in earnest because this version of Akane really can fight like an Amazon, only she loses like one in this instance, and right before witnesses so she can't even deny it. Now she's stuck having to date BOTH Ranma and Kuno, with Mousse and Roller giving all the support to their friend that you could expect from a pair of Amazon men who've always thought Ranma a little too uppity for their liking..."
"Yes," Mousse could not help grinning as he exchanged a look with Roller, "Definitely looked to us like you defeated her in battle. Does that sound about right with you?"
"Well, yes," Roller allowed, "Mind you she's technically not really an outsider, but she's an Amazon, so the rules still apply to her anyway..."
"WHAT?" Ranma exclaimed, "But-No way! I didn't defeat her like that! She didn't give me any choice, I had to...to...!"
"You've gotta be kidding me!" Akane exclaimed in outrage, "No way am I putting up with this! I demand a rematch...!"
"Akane," Nabiki sighed, "Give it up. You lost fair and square, and if you didn't want to lose you shouldn't have challenged him in the first place...and I really am annoyed with you, little sister."
"Annoyed with me?" Akane blinked, "How come?"
"Because it's not enough that you have all the boys chasing after you back home," Nabiki growled, "Oh no, you've even got to hog all the cute ones out here in China!"
"Nani?" Ranma responded, looking from one Tendo sister to the other...
"That chick sure is worked up about it," Bacchus mused, "Really does remind me a lot of Diana..."
"Fortunately, this version of Akane is more in touch with her feelings and isn't as obsessed with denying her sexuality," Toltiir commented, "She's about 78.2% Lesbian with just a smattering of Hetero in the mixture, as signified by her crush on that Bishonen guy, Tofu. She really resents the idea about being engaged to any boy, until she finds out about Ranma's little secret..."
Akane sputtered as she emerged from the water that she and Ranma had fallen into, complaining bitterly and wanting to vent her frustration on this boy who was turning her life into a living hell. She opened her eyes with the intent on chewing him out...
...And came face-to-face with a pair of the bluest eyes that she had ever met, which came complete with the nice packaging of a cute redhead staring back in her direction.
"..." was all that came out from her lips as Akane gazed fully at an Amazon girl who clearly was even smaller than she was.
"I'm sorry about this," Ranma winced, "Don't get angry, it's just this...condition I'm stuck with..."
"..." was all that Akane could bring herself to say under the circumstances...
"Hmm..." Toltiir mused again, "Akane falls in love on the spot with the 'Cute Redhead' and doesn't immediately figure out that she and Ranma are one and the same person. The Saotome boy is surprised at being treated differently as a girl and is too reluctant and embarrassed to tell her about the curse, so he allows her to believe that he and the redhead are two entirely different people. Mousse picks up the hint and refers to the redhead as Ranma's cousin, which sets things up in an interesting direction..."
"If you say so," Bacchus belched, "Sounds a little too much of summa my relashuns."
"Kuno's ticked off...no surprise there," Toltiir noted as this was only to be expected, "He accuses Ranma of trying to steal his girl, while Kodachi is amused to see her brother given the send-up by another girl once she sees Akane flirting with the redhead. Ukyo makes overtures to befriend Ranma, Mousse and Ryoga and doesn't have any real romantic designs on any of them in this timeline, making little secret that her interests go elsewhere. Shampoo's upset that some 'Outsider girl' thinks she's good enough to be dating her brother, and the situation gets even worse when some of the Elders judge that Akane's defeat counts as a technical engagement."
"Whoah, Dude," Bacchus exclaimed, "They really are just like those Amazon broads who insisted that big Bro Herk was engaged with Hippolyta...Hippy Lotta...somethin' like that..."
"Hmm," Toltiir mused, "That's interesting...at first the mothers are appalled at the idea while the fathers are ecstatic, but given time to confer with their spouses they convince Comb and Silk that it really is for the best, and before too long the mothers are enthusiastically pushing for the union of their two houses. This on top of Ganglot being free and at large convinces the family to move back to Japan after the Elders begin to express displeasure at having their nice, orderly lives disrupted with these antics."
"Whoah, they sure give that Old Broad the heave hoe," Bacchus arched both eyebrows, "It's a palace coup all right with that Beady-Eyed gal assuming control while calling it a 'Temporary' situation."
"Cologne's still hiding the truth about her age from the others so they don't suspect that she's really part Juraian with an extended lifespan, courtesy of that staff of hers which comes from her father's tree, Funaho," Toltiir revealed, "So she plans on waiting a generation, then coming back from abroad and pretending to be her own great-great-grandchild and gradually forcing her way back onto the Council. A long life really is the best sort of revenge..."
"I coulda toldja that, Dude," Bacchus sniffed.
"So the family agrees to pull up stakes and move to Japan," Toltiir rolled his eyes, "The Beverly Hillbillies come to Nerima."
"They do, where?" Bacchus peered around the Well in hopes of seeing Elle May Klampet skinny dip in the "Cement Pond."
"Never mind," Toltiir sighed, "Those Wacky Amazons...looks like this timeline might even be worth keeping around a bit...purely for research purposes, of course."
"You think?" Bacchus grinned as the two Immortals bent to the task of studying the circumstances revolving around a young Amazon boy named Saotome Ranma...
To Be Continued?
Comments/Criticisms/Witticisms/Have you no shame? Shadowmane
I wrote this with the intent of exploring a question, and at the present time I've no desire to turn it into a full series, but I kind of like where things are going here, so maybe it's worth a second look another time, do you think? Opens up some real possibilities for a very "Alternate" version of a Ranma fanfic, and maybe one where I can expand on some of the scenes I've given short shift here. Do you think this is worth expanding and continuing? Let me know if the concept appeals to you...until later, Sayonara!
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