Bound Souls
Disclaimer: The characters in this writing are not mine but rather the producers of Once Upon a Time.
Note: I think I stand with you all as I say how utterly heart broken I am. After seeing the images of what is to come tonight, I just don't think I can bare to see it all actually happen. I know Lana Parrilla and Sean Maguire are going to nail it but I really don't think my heart can take it. I've never felt so connected to two characters as I do Robin and Regina. Here's my take on this night. I apologize for any errors.
Thump! Thump! Thump! The steady beat of her heart filled her ears as she laid on her side, hands tucked under her cheek. Her eyes fixated on the organ resting on her nightstand. The clouded darkness that had once encompassed it had long faded and now gave way to a vibrant crimson. Every sign of life rested within her even as the air hungry pain threatened to drown her alive. Closing her eyes, Regina tried desperately to fade out the reality of this day. Nothing encompassing this day could be true. This must be a curse, a sleeping curse.
Robin rested beside his Queen as her eyes fluttered with the ending dreams of a peaceful rest. Propped up on his right elbow, he caressed his fingers through the tousled wonder that was her near ebony hair. He had an infatuation with her hair...it's what she would often tell him as his fingers always seemed to find their way through it. Robin wouldn't deny the allegations; however in truth, it was an infatuation with anything that was his love. "My love," his fingers curled over her right cheek until they returned to their home in her hair whilst the palm resting on her cheek willed her to wake. Regina sighed a yawn as her eyes opened slowly requiring a moment to take in the sight before her. Her love. He gave her a sheepish smile, his teeth caught on his bottom lip before leaning down and catching her lips in a kiss that brought her to complete wakefulness. Robin hadn't been able to keep his hands off her since their return from the Underworld. He willed his body to find comfort with the carnal knowledge that they had truly survived and this time, they had pulled through together. As their lips parted, Regina's sigh tickled his lips, "You really haven't let me rest, or yourself for that matter." Robin's lips curled into a knowing smirk that had once been trademarked solely by her as his hand left her hair to caress her bare stomach beneath cool Egyptian cotton. He shifted until she rested completely beneath him, his lips not yet kissing but caressing her own, "Could you truly blame me?" Regina breathed out a shuddered ,"No" against his lips as they claimed her and together they drifted into a binding of already wed souls.
The creaking of her bedroom door caused her deep brown eyes to open pulling her from the memories of the last time she felt truly whole. 30 years have passed and little had seemed to age but these four walls and ... Henry. "Mom," Henry stood strong at her door, or at least he tried, holding the storybook beneath his left arm. Regina drew in a shuddered aching breath, she had to try and be strong for her son and his...but in that moment she could not find the strength. Her body willed her to sit up on her bed but her soul merely couldn't muster the thought...not when it rested inside of her incomplete. Henry looked to her nightstand and took in the sight of his mother's beating heart, and how grateful he was that it was still beating because now it seemed to be the only proof of life. He moistened his lips and swallowed his own heartache before kneeling at his mother's bedside,"I will fix this mom. We all will...all of us together. I don't care how many nights I have to stay awake writing...I will get Robin back home." Regina's hollow eyes softened as she reached her hand up and wiped away the track of tears that rested on his own cheeks. In that moment, Henry saw what he never had realized, how truly small framed his mother was. Her persona always warranted the image of all things great, powerful, unbeatable, and refined; however, before him laid his mother, a woman in agony. His heart tightened for not only the loss of a man that he slowly began to see, not only as his mother's soul mate rather ,as a father but for how palpable the pain radiating from Regina was. In that moment, he wished he could write himself, sword in hand cutting through the dense web of pain encompassing his mother. His palm itched as the author's pen appeared in hand but as he went to open the great brown book of tales, Regina's hand caught his. The amount of strength it took this mighty Queen to sit up was enough to cause the Author to drop the book. She cupped her sons cheeks in her hands and with all her strength, she smiled at him. With a voice hoarse from hours of crying, she whispered, "No more stories Henry...not of me. I understand now."
Henry furrowed his brow even as Regina pressed her lips to them, "It will all be okay my little prince." The sound of her defeated voice caused fresh tears to stream down his cheeks, " What do you understand now?" His question passed in a whisper almost in fear of its response. Looking towards her nightstand, Regina once again took in the sight of her heart and as crimson as it now appeared to be, beneath the surface broke free the clouds of darkness surrounding the organ. "I'm a villain and villain's don't get happy endings." Henry shuddered at the emptiness of her response and slowly got to his feet, now towering over her. "You're not a villain! You don't deserve any of what is happening Mom and I'm going to prove it to you. If it weren't for magic, none of this would be real right now." Regina tried to reach for her son's hands but he bent to gather the book, "Henry..." Henry looked down at Regina, "You have more than redeemed yourself Mom. We don't need the book to tell us that but I'm going to fix this." Henry turned on his heels quickly and as much as Regina wanted to run after him, in that moment she couldn't. Pressing her hands over her face, she closed her eyes and willed herself to rest.
Regina turned through pages upon pages of heroes and villains painted across the pages of Henry's storybook. She sat in her study looking for clues on how to return a lost love. Emma had once dedicated herself to finding Regina's happy ending and now, now it was her turn. Seeing the blonde grip on to the pirates arm as the coroner's technicians pulled him away on a gurney had broken Regina in more ways than she cared to say aloud. Robin entered holding a glass of apple cider for his love, only to stop in front of her. She looked up at him seeing how lovingly he looked down at her before taking the book from her hands and setting it aside. Gently, he pulled her out of the black leather couch before settling into it and urging her to sit on his lap. Regina put up no counter despite there being a perfectly good seat besides him. In this moment, they both couldn't get quite close enough to one another. Life was far to vulnerable a state not to be as close as they could possibly be. Settling the cider on her lap, Regina looked at Robin with all the vulnerability of a woman, one who often back into her self-loathing ways. "Do not for one moment try to punish yourself for this my love." Robin curled his fingers under her chin to have her look into his eyes, "The lot of us could not have fought off the dark ones no matter what was done even if it meant laying down our own lives." Regina rested her forehead against his and whispered, "I'll help her in any way she wants me too...but..." She swallowed past the lump in her throat and looked into his eyes, "Robin, you're in great danger every moment you're with me. I couldn't survive if it had been you they were pulling away tonight. At least, if we were..." Robin clutched her chin in his a bit firmer than intended causing Regina to gasp, "Do not do this again Regina. No matter how many times you try to push me away, I will not stand by it. My soul, my heart, my arms crave your presence every moment of every day. Do not ask me to be incomplete a moment more." Regina sighed before bringing her hands to cup his cheeks, " The Evil Queen doesn't deserve a happy ending while the Savior suffers." Robin kissed her lips passionately, chasing her lips once...twice...and a third before whispering, " You are not the Evil Queen anymore my love. Regina deserves our happy ending and as we're both a part of this relationship, I fully intend to fight for our love enough for the both of us." Taking one of her hands from his cheek, Robin placed it over the steady Thump of his heart beat, "I..." Regina looked into his eyes willing him not to say it now when the air felt thick with loss but he shook his head, "I love you Regina. I'm a man that is head over heels in love with every beat of your heart and there is nothing you can say to make me stop." Regina took in a shuddered breath overwhelmed with the emotions that pulled on her. She could never be apart from him, her body and very soul have become reliant on his mere presence to stand steady. Resting all of herself against him, Regina whispered against his lips, "I love you Robin."
"Regina?" a whisper of her name had Regina bringing her hands down to rest on her lap. Snow stood at the door dressed in a gloomy black dress that set a steep contrast to everything that embodied the very person she was. "Not another hope speech Snow...not again...not now," Regina tilted her head upwards to stop the tears from spilling over the rim of her eyes. The pain gripping her entire body still remained terribly intense despite having pulled her very heart out hours again. Snow walked over towards Regina and pulled her hand into her own as she sat on her bed besides her and stuttering, "I ..I don't have one." Regina looked at Snow directly then to see the younger woman's eyes reddened and swollen with tears of her very own. "Regina, let me help you...please," the last word was said in desperation as the silver white tears tracked down porcelain skin. "Don't shut us out again. We're family." Regina swallowed deeply before looking behind her at Robin's pillow. Her family had been torn apart. Everything she had once found to be real and grounding felt surreal and unsteady. Robin might have only been a part of her feeling at home in the world but he was vital. He kept her grounded and believed in her when no one else did, not even herself. Two halves of one soul torn apart causing the Queen to loose her bearings.
Robin gripped Regina's hand and brought it up to his chest, "Use mine for the both of us." Regina felt the empty shell inside of her chest quiver in what she could only imagine as her falling deeper in love with the man with the lion tattoo, even with her heart miles away. Their lips pulled together as she gripped his jacket in her right hand...
"Regina?" Snow's hand shook hers back into the moment. Regina looked at Snow and followed her eyes to her heart on the oak nightstand. Snow gripped her hand in a vise, "He fought very hard to make sure you'd never loose that again." Regina nodded slowly before shuddering, "I can't breathe with it inside of my chest. It's unbearable... I knew one day my actions would ultimately greet me."She turned to face Snow, who refused to let go of Regina's hand even when she attempted to pull it away. Scalding tears burned Regina's cheeks, " I only wish I had been able to save him the price of loving me." Snow looked down to her own lap before mustering the courage to look into Regina's eyes again, "He came to me many times when it was believed Marian had returned. Often, it was just to see how you were doing but...many times, it was for consolation. I don't think I'd ever seen the tears of a man so potent that I was certain they came from his soul. It was as though he was mourning you, even though you were within arms reach. His body would shake and seeing the way you're shaking now, I know it was from loosing a part of your soul."
Regina shook as she stared into Snow's deep blue eyes, "Why didn't you tell me this?" Snow gave a watery smile, "I once wasn't very good at keeping a secret and like you Regina, I've changed. I wanted to keep his." Snow's eyelashes fluttered closed as she looked away from Regina, who fought through air foggy with pain to take in a breath. She looked at the deep black cape overlay dress that draped over Regina's vanity lounge and whispered, "You should get dressed. I...i'll give you a moment." Regina reached her hands up and tried to wipe the tears that continued to stream down her cheeks before Snow cleared her throat of the rawness, "He'd want your heart where it belongs Regina. He fought tooth and nail to protect it for you while he was still with us...and it is what he loves most about you." Regina wrapped her arms around herself as Snow closed the door. If everything ached and hurt so badly as it was, how could she ever exist with her heart confined inside of her body. Maybe, that's why her mother never did.
Robin held her hand tightly as he led her through the forest without the need of a compass or map. Her lips upturned into a shy smirk as she looked around and still found she was uncertain of exactly where he was leading her...but she trusted him. The battle between Zelena and the heroes had exhausted her ;however, watching as he triumphantly showed her the pouch he had retrieved with her heart safe inside, she would push away every ounce of tiredness to follow him. The sharp needles of the pine trees brushed against the silken cotton of her dress causing her wince slightly. Robin grimaced before pulling her before him, guiding her away from anything that would cause her any harm, "Apologies milady, but here we are." Regina gave a soft laugh as she walked into the clearing and stood before the heavy oak log that laid across the earth. "I have found many romantic interludes take place in secretive locations in the forest...not that I stay and...I mean." Regina gave an uncharacteristically loud laugh before interlacing her fingers with his, "I understand Robin. You're not some secretive voyeur." Robin's dimpled cheeks turned a crimson red before he cleared his throat, "Unless it has to do with a certain audacious Queen." It was Regina's turn to blush as she lowered her head and nervously tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, "What...I mean...have you seen anything of interest?" Regina looked at him with a uniquely raised brow before the look that fell on his face (sheer embarrassment of course) caused her to chuckle deeply. "I am a thief by trade milady and we may consider changing the locks of your back door one of these days."Regina's jaw dropped at Robin's insinuation before the secretive laugh he was hiding broke free, "I'd never invade your privacy milady...not then anyhow."
Regina gave him a wink that faded into a pure shyness that seemed to surprise Robin, yet intrigue him to the very core. Robin shook his head and pulled her towards the log, assisting her to sit upon it before straddling it himself and facing her, satchel in hand. "This is where I first saw you Regina...you for you. Your laugh that night had my heart stuttering like a love sick boy and I knew from that moment on, I wouldn't stop until I could have another glimpse at the woman behind the crown." Regina smiled at him before looking at him, "This is our place?" Robin nodded before resting his fingers beneath her chin and pulling her in for a kiss, "If it pleases you milady." Robin smiled against her lips and brought the protected satchel to his lap, opening it and presenting her heart between them. "I thought this would be the best place to guide your heart home." Regina looked at the dark heart nestled in his stealthy hands and gave a shuddered sigh, "It's a bit of an overwhelmingly vulnerable feeling when I put it back in place. I don't do it in front of anyone." Robin gave a respectful nod as he placed her heart in her hands and prepared to stand from his place before Regina reached up for his hand stilling him, "Will you help me?" Robin smirked and wrapped an arm around her waist, pulling her close to him, "Always Milady." His large hand cupped her dainty ones and assisted in guiding it into her chest, holding her close as she released a painful gasp. Her eyes opened in wonderment and glistened with tears as she looked into his, "Hi." Robin couldn't help but pull her into another kiss and indeed, if he thought her a great kisser before, with her heart in her chest, their kisses grew far more intense and he found himself looking forward to many a romantic interlude at their spot.
Regina clutched her heart in her hands remembering all to clearly the last time she'd had his hands over hers guiding her heart back home. Now, her own bare hands would be alone and she would face the pain that this moment caused alone, only to have it melt away to a pain so great that temptations to merely crush it could not be denied. The door to her bedroom slowly opened without her knowledge and in walked the fiery red head, who had stood behind that door for minutes before wondering if she should enter. Zelena's breath caught as she saw Regina's vacant eyes stare at her heart and she knew all to well the thoughts racing through her mind; they had often been her very own thoughts.
"Don't...do it," Zelena whispered breaking Regina from her potentially harmful trance. Regina swallowed and rested her the heart to her chest before looking up at the sister who she struggled so deeply to forgive. Slowly, she looked at Zelena and saw her eyes were still shedding tears that she too cried over the body of her soul mate. That's when she remembered that Zelena had turned around and destroyed Hades with the very weapon he had used to murder Robin. As much anger as she held for this woman, she could only look at her as the sister who knew no better than to destroy what stood in her way because she didn't understand what she knew now, love is not weakness. This time, Hades had used her as a pawn. Starring at Zelena who now rested had sunken to her knees before her and rested her head on her lap, "I'm so sorry Regina. I didn't know Hades would hurt Robin. I believed his beating heart and I were enough, but it wasn't."
Regina looked between her sister and her heart before raising the organ to her chest and taking in a buffering breath before shoving it back into place. The pain felt like a knife slashing through her being from head to toe, ripping from her everything that made her feel light in that very moment. Sobs of pure agony filtered through the pristine mansion causing those gathered downstairs (David, Snow, Henry, and Tinkerbell) to grimace and hold on to each other as Regina's pain bordered physical torture for them all. Zelena felt her eyes burn as she watched her sister curl into herself in attempts to ease the ache that had returned ten-fold and seemed to swallow her whole. It became difficult for Regina to breath as she attempted to push herself towards Robin's side of the bed and clutch onto his pillow. Zelena sobbed as she watched the woman she had worked so hard to destroy, kill even, break before her. Before, the site of the Evil Queen broken and laying helpless before her would have rung victory through her veins, causing cackling laughter of joy to escape her envious lips. Now, she could vividly picture the little sister dressed as a princess screaming her name as they were viciously pulled apart. Before her didn't rest a queen. No. Before her ached her sister whose pain she could feel in her very soul. Regina's sobs gripped their way around the once frozen heart of Zelena making her privy to a private pain that was the loss of a soul mate.
Climbing onto Regina's bed, Zelena placed a hand on her sister's before the voice of Cora rung through her head, "Hold on to each other." Zelena broke and wrapped her arms around her sister, "It will all be okay." The way her voice stuttered showed that Zelena herself couldn't believe in her own statement. Regina swallowed a sob and shook her head, " No,...it's not."
Robin's hands gripped onto either side of Regina's head willing himself to remember how every beautiful strand of infatuation he had felt against him . His forehead pressed against her own as he pulled her so close; he wished his very soul could just engulf her and bring his love with him as he crossed the line. Regina nuzzled her nose against his as a sob she tried so desperately to keep from him broke free. His crystal blue eyes opened to peer into her deep brown orbs, "This is not goodbye my love. I will fight with every fiber of my being to return to you. I will never be complete until I have you in my arms again." Regina opened her mouth to speak only to have his hands tilt her head upwards. Stealing her breath, he captured her in a searing melding of lips. Robin put every ounce of love and passion into that kiss as Regina gripped the lapels of his jacket until her knuckles turned a deathly pale. He kept his lips connected to hers as he began stepping back past the line and a sob wracked his lips against hers, 'I love you Regina." She fell to her knees before the line as suddenly he stood on the other side, tears falling to the ground. "I love you too," she hugged herself knowing he hadn't heard her.
The knuckles on his hands had been deathly pale as she gripped onto them before the coroners technicians pulled him from her grasp. Before her now was his casket made from the very oak log that had once rested in the spot that was their very own. It was all a blur as every person placed a golden arrow upon the coffin of her soul mate and bid their goodbyes,...Roland had clutched onto his before letting it rest in the center of all the arrows. Turning around, her littlest knight looked at her as his own little breath shuddered with more pain than a child of five years should ever know. "R'gina..." tears melted the firm stance Regina had tried to keep before the people of Storybrooke. Letting her umbrella fall to the ground, everyone watched as the Queen fell to her knees opening her arms so Roland could wrap himself in them. Defeated sobs wracked her very soul as she tried desperately to comfort Roland. He wrapped his entire body around her as together, they cried tears that urged the gray skies to break and weep for the tearing apart of bound souls.
