Disclaimer : This story and some of the future characters are mine. The rest belong to AWM, Milmar and ABC.
Richard Castle startles awake, heart pounding, sweat drenching his body as his eyes roam wildly back and forth, searching the darkness for the source of his distress. He lies on his back and his searching eyes still to focus on the barely visible ceiling above him as he waits for his racing pulse and mind to slow. He takes some deep breaths to try and assist the slowing. While helping slightly he then does the next thing that is assured to calm him.
Castle rolls onto his side and over to where his wife is lying on the bed, facing away from him. He moves his considerable frame as carefully as he can so not to wake her while still seeking out the comfort and reassurance of her physical presence. His mind and heart calm almost instantly as he curls his bulk around her slender body and as he feels her instinctively relax into his body in her sleep. Breathing deeply as he buries his face into her flowing brown hair he revels in her distinctive scent and he relaxes even further.
He smiles into her hair as he feels her hand also instinctively seek out and grip his own as he splays it over her stomach. The disquiet he is feeling bleeds away as he revels in the feeling of Kate securely in his embrace. While he can't remember exactly the details of the dream that drove him awake he can still just remember the feelings that had his heart racing. The same feelings that haunted him over the last couple of terrible days. He thought he'd lost her, again.
It is only a couple of days since he thankfully got her back from Tyson and Nieman and they are both trying to put the ordeal behind them. Captain Gates has given Kate a week's medical leave to recuperate and told him that he wasn't expected to start his 'community service' and return as a consultant at the 12th until Kate herself returns to work. He is more than happy with that as not only Kate but he has been gravely effected by the merry-go-round that the two psychopaths had put them on. They have spent the time since just lazing around the loft waiting for Alexis and his mother to return, sleeping, reading, watching movies and other life affirming bedroom activities.
Despite the relaxing nature of the last couple of days it has still been rough for both of them. She because of the ordeal that Nieman put her through and the means by which she was forced kill the mad doctor to save herself. The ordeal of being rendered helpless while Nieman casually planned to take her face. The means of killing her by stabbing her with her own scalpel. Stabbing. The same way her mother was killed. That bedrock of her life that has driven her and which she had mostly now put behind her. All that added to the feelings of helplessness and grief that she is feeling after the whole experience.
While feeling relief that he has her back with him safe and mostly unharmed he still feels the heartrending grief from when he thought it was her shot in that warehouse. He also feels guilty at not being able to protect her. At not being able to stop this, to stop them. They came after her because of him and for that he will never forgive himself. If only he hadn't been banished from the 12th then maybe this wouldn't have happened.
He squeezes Kate to him tighter but not enough to wake her and feels the heat of her body meld with his. Yes, he had been allowed back at the start of the case so technically he was back in his old place as her partner so maybe even if he hadn't been banned this all still would have happened. But maybe him being a just a consultant and not a 'real' cop was one of the reasons why those two maniacs were able to get her. If he had been a true partner then she probably would have never gone to meet Amy Barrett alone. No, Ryan and Esposito never go anywhere without one another so if he was a true partner for Kate then he should have been there with her.
Of course, in most cases, she is more that capable to look after herself and going to meet someone they thought as a witness and potential victim shouldn't have needed the both of them. Hell, that same reason that has her so distressed, being able to free herself and slice open Nieman's throat only goes to show how capable, strong and just plain badass she is to him. That still doesn't assuage his guilt and sorrow at what she experienced and that he wasn't there to try and stop it.
Yes, he was able to lure Tyson into that trap, get the means to find Kate and now both of them are dead and that is good. However he still can't but help and think that if he was more than just a helpful amateur then none of that would have been needed. His brief stint as a PI had been interesting for a while and had been the only way of keeping him both somewhat a part of Kate's cases and for him to keep his hand in at solving mysteries. But that time had only reinforced the fact that he wasn't a professional and didn't have the resources of the NYPD. Also, he really was at his best when at her side and he really can't allow another chance of interference in their partnership. It was as Gates said even if she was repeating Kate, she looked for the evidence and he looked for the story and combined those two elements make one hell of a detective. Separate they are good but together they are unstoppable.
His time forced from her side only served to reinforce that fact. His work as a PI towards the end had started to feel unfulfilling and he really only felt right during those few cases he was able to work with Kate. So the only silver lining of their recent experience, besides finally being rid of that despicable duo, is that he is allowed back as her partner but is that enough?
Over the years they've joked about the number of times they have saved each other but a lot of those times were pure luck. How long before their luck runs out? What if Kate hadn't been able to get free and turn that scalpel on Nieman? He and the boys were still minutes away when Nieman decided to leave and kill Kate before doing so. So his clever scheme could have easily led to naught if not for the strength and resourcefulness of his remarkable wife. With him now allowed back as her partner make her any safer? He hopes so. At least they will be able to keep more of an eye on each other.
Kate had shown her own nervousness at him being out there, on cases, by himself more than once while he was a PI. It culminated in her demand that he let her know his whereabouts after he got taken by that mercenary during the fake clutch case. So while he was banned from the 12th he worried about her, she worried about him and together neither of them felt at ease with the whole situation. Oh, he put on a brave face and tried to concentrate on the possibilities of inspiration for a new character but without Kate, without his muse, it was a poor imitation of the life and partnership that had brought them together.
The way that he was removed from her side still rankles with him and shows that despite all his contacts and money his position as Kate's partner is ever at the mercy of others. For a man whose talents have enabled him to determine his own destiny for so long he does not like that one bit. Especially as it also impacted on his ability to protect a member of his family, the love of his life and that is something that will not stand with him.
Not to mention the future he hopes for Kate and himself and their life together and how it could be jeopardized. He knows that he is not the only one, Kate especially, that is looking forward to all that might be in their future as a married couple. In particular that hopefully there will be a further addition to their family in that not too distant future. He needs to do everything he can to ensure that future and that is best done as her partner at the 12th.
So him being kicked out whether because of a mistake of his own or because of someone higher up, like Gates, deciding they don't like consultants working for the NYPD anymore is not acceptable. OK, maybe he doesn't really need to worry about Gates anymore after the surprising encouragement she gave him while he was searching for Kate. Plus she didn't look too broken up that he was coming back. Perhaps, finally, Kate's stern Captain has warmed to him. Castle, shrugs, well maybe she's just learnt to tolerate him but that still doesn't mean that someone else higher in the chain, like the DA did, couldn't one day have him booted out of the 12th again.
The fact remains that as a volunteer consultant his working partnership with Kate will never be totally secure. He has to come up with something so that it won't be quite so easy for him to be taken from her side. He knows that nothing he will come up with will be fool proof. Castle grins as he hears his wife's voice in his head saying, "Shouldn't that be Castle proof?" Yeah, she'd say that. He sighs and snuggles as close as he can into her back.
His friend Bob was anything but helpful during his recent banishment so he should be feeling suitably guilt ridden as a result of not being able to back up a friend. Not to mention how Bob owes him for his support during that little matter of him being accused of murder a couple of years ago. He'd not been able to use that to get him back to the 12th but now, combined with having been somewhat responsible for the removal of two serial killers, he might be able to work on Bob's guilt to get what he wants.
He has an idea about what he wants but there are a few details yet to work out. If this idea he has forming pans out then it will make it just a little bit more difficult to get rid of him from the 12th. Not impossible but he wouldn't be just be shown the door after some very few words. It will require a commitment by him, a bit of work and pulling in of a lot of favours but if the alternative is another stint on the outer and away from Kate's side then there really is no option.
Castle closes his eyes and again breathes in deeply the distinctive, cherry, vanilla and solely Kate scent of his wife. He'll do whatever he can to put him in a position to try and prevent her ever again experiencing the terror filled days of the recent past. But that is for the morning or even the morning after that. For now time to try and get some more sleep and hope his burgeoning idea and resolve will keep the dreams at bay.
As he slowly slips back into sleep his last conscious thought is that here, where he is now, next to Kate is where he belongs for the rest of his days.
A/N : So if you have read my other in progress story "The Exes" then you will know that, along with that fic, I am currently working on a couple of multi-chapter stories and this is one of them. This will be a long one and like with my other story there will be gaps between updates due to life and work. I'll try to put up chapters regularly but bear with me if there is a wait in between them. This is a long term story that will lead us well past the end of season seven and into hopefully what will be the hiatus before season eight. I will have another chapter for The Exes up by the end of the week.
I hope you all enjoy Castle Monday.