Disclaimer: Sadly, I do not own Invader Zim or the characters. Everything belongs to Jhonen! Everything do you hear me? Everything!!! Coughs You should know that by now, you horrible human worm monkey. If I did, you would be able to tell… Trust me! And no suing! Do you hear? No Suing Me! Because if you did, all you would be able to get is this hunk-of-junk computer and nothing! Starts laughing insanely
Talk Show
Episode 1
By Ronin S. Oath
Host: Hello, everyone out there! Welcome to another episode of… um… yea… Anyways… Here we have Zim and Dib from the popular, but unfortunately cancelled, TV show called Invader Zim.
Crowd cheers wildly.
Host: Shut-up!
Crowd is so silent that you are able to hear crickets chirping in the background.
Host: Now heeeeeeeeere's our guest! First up, we have Mr. Zim… um… Just what is this kid's last name?
Guy in the Back: Just skip it!
Host: O…K… Come on out, Zim!
Zim walks out onto the stage, crowd cheers wildly.
Zim: Yes… Yes! I am Zim!
Dib (from off stage): They know who you are, Zim! Geez!
Zim glares off stage at Dib.
Host: And next, we have the large headed kid, Dib Membrane…
Crowd boos as Dib walks onto the stage, and one person throws a bag of popcorn at him. Dib looks around to see who threw it, but the bright lights surrounding the stage blind him…
Host: Take you seats boys.
Zim and Dib sit down in the chairs across from one another.
Host: So Zim, Dib… Is there anything you'd like to share with the world?
Zim: I am Zim!
Dib: Everyone knows that already!
Zim and Dib glare at each other.
Host: Yes… Is there anything else you'd like to tell us? Maybe you, Dib?
Dib: Oh, I don't know… Maybe the fact that no one cares that Zim is an alien!
Zim: Lies! All lies! The filthy stink-beast lies! I am Zim!
Dib: Come on! He's an alien! Just look at him! He's green and he's got no ears! That's no a skin condition, people! Seriously, why do I even have to try this hard to prove that to you?!?
Host: Are you feeling alright, Dib?
Zim: Oh don't mind him… The Dib-beast is just sensitive about his enormously large sized head of meats.
Dib: Always with the size of my head! My head's not big!
Host: You mean that's really your real head?!?
Dib: Wha? Yes, it's my real head!
Host: Oh, you poor little boy… I thought you may have had a horrible accident when you were a child, and had to go to the hospital to get your head enlarged… But to be born with a head that large!
Crowd: Awwww…
Dib: What?!? There is nothing wrong with the size of my head! It's a normal sized head!
Zim: Normal if you're a Zangoniea from the Planet Zangon!
Dib: You see! Zim is an alien! Who's ever heard of Planet Zangon?!?
Girl in the Crowd: I have!
Dib: Huh?
Host: O…k then…
There is a moment of silence in which the host watches Zim and Dib glare at one another.
Host: So you two have been friends for a long time now. Can you tell us what you do for fun?
Dib: What?!?
Zim: Zim is no friend to that pitiful human!
Host: So… is that a no?
Dib and Zim are about to speak again until-
Host: I'm sorry boys, you are out of time! But for a constellation prize, you get this free bag of cheesy poofs… And this free car!
Dib: But we don't drive…
Host: Then you're out of luck. Please join us next time for… um… for… hmm… We really need to get a name for this show…
Zim: What? That's it?!? I wasted my day with this when I could have been coming up with another plan for world domination?!?
Dib: See! Did you hear that? He just said 'world domination'! Didn't you see?
Dib notices that everyone but Zim and the Host had already left, and the Host was too busy talking to himself to pay any attention to them…
End…?
So… How'd you like it? Should I continue? Please review, and tell me Tell meeeeee!