Hey guys:) That is my first fanfic and I'm kind of new. I'm from germany and have no beta reader so I'm sorry for the mistakes:/
The Story is kinda AU. Here Neal arrived before Cora and is together with Emma. I plan to do a Swan Queen fic and hopefully you like it. I would appreciate tips and ideas from you:)

3 Months ago Regina found out that she was pregnant. 3 Months ago her already broken world just broke a little more. She knew that she wasn't allowed to keep the baby if someone would find out about who the father was. Also, she knew that she would be infertile after this child. So, Regina sat depressed in her living room and stared at the TV. She felt lonely and just wanted to be loved. To be loved by her little angel Henry. She stroked unconsciously her pregnant belly, which hosted her 7 month old baby. Sometimes life was hell for her. "Everyone would be happy if i would be dead.",she murmured quiet. "Maybe I just should do that… Maybe my time is up an I just should die." She looked down at her belly. "No one ever could take you away from me. We would be together forever. And dead I would be free of all these sins. We could love us unconditionally…" With that she stood up an walked into her study. She filled her part of the adoption papers and wrote her last will down. Than she grabbed a new paper and started to write a last letter to her beloved son Henry.

Dear Henry,

I know that it is hard to understand, why I did what I did. Your mother will take good care of you and you can have the big happy family you deserve, without me standing in your way. It's better for me, if I'm dead. Everyone can live in peace without me interfering.

I wrote you this letter because I want you to know how much I love you, my little bear. It's not your fault and I'm proud that you first thought about everyone else's happy ending. I'm so proud that you grew up to this responsible young man. That means that I did one thing in my life right once.

My part of your adoption papers are signed so that Emma just has to sign her part and you are fully hers. Furthermore I'll give you my house, although it will be Emmas until you turned 18. Then you can do everything you like with it.

My last wish is that you bury me next to my dear father, so we can be united.

I'll always protect you, my sweetheart.

Love, Mom.

Then she put everything in one big folder and satisfied took it in the living room, where she thought about different ways of dying. Then something came up in her mind. Quickly she put her best dress on and reopened the big folder.

PS:If you don't find my corpse it's okay. I'll be there where no one ever see it.

Cold, Dark and inexorably,

There you'll find me maybe.

Thousand crossed it already,

There where I'll take my destiny.

She looked one last time over it before she sent it ,with a flick of her wrist, to the Apartment of the Charmings. Regina transported herself to the docks and looked over the sea to the horizon. ,,I'm sorry that you couldn't see the world, Anastasia. But it is cruel and unfair.",Regina said and stroked softly her belly.

In the meantime Emma sat on the couch at the apartment of the Charmings. She almost cried out loud when suddenly the letter appeared out of nowhere. "Funny, Regina. Really funny.",she muttered a little angry. Neal came down the stairs and looked at Emma questionably. "What's up, Ems?",he asked and kissed her longingly. She shrugged and took the letter while Neal tried to unbutton her jeans. Emma read the first paragraph of the letter and pushed Neal away from her. She hoped that she just misunderstood Regina and that she hadn't killed herself. "Neal… Regina. She will kill herself or killed herself already.",she said and she heard a gasp behind her. Snow stood there shocked and took the letter from her. "But… but why?",Snow asked and sobbed. Mr. Gold stood with David and Henry in the doorway and shook his head. "Really? You don't know? You kept her only hope away from her. Treated her like dirt and just used her for things you needed. She is lonely and depressed.",he explained and Emma sighed. "How can we find her? She said that we probably won't find her corpse." "Yes, but she wrote a riddle.",Snow replied and read the poem to everyone. Henry thought about all the things his mother loved and suddenly he struck an idea. "The docks.",he said. "Cold, Dark, inexorably. It's the water. And thousand people crossed it already with a boat." Emma nodded and stood up. "Okay. David, Snow, Neal. You will still look if Regina is at home. Gold and I will go to the docks and search her there." With that everyone went to their cars and drove.

Regina slowly walked toward the water and whispered her apologies toward her little baby. Just one step and she would die. One step and the pain wouldn't pull her down anymore. She heard a car behind her but didn't care. Emma, who jumped out of the car as fast as possible ran towards Regina. But Regina just made her last step and vanished in the depth of the ocean. "No!",Emma screamed and came to the end of the dock. She didn't see Regina anymore. Gold finally stand next to her and stared down in the water. ,,Please Gold, please don't let her die. Henry wouldn't want that. Please.",Emma begged Gold and he looked at her thoughtfully. Then he nodded. Slowly he extended his magic into the water and found Reginas almost lifeless body. He pulled her out of the water and laid her down on the boards of the docks. "Is she..?",Emma didn't dare to speak it out loud.

TBC...?