Disclaimer: I do not and will never ever own Hetalia… It belongs to Himaruya-sama…

My first ever Hetalia fanfic~ I just adore this pairing XD

Enjoy~

In my arms

The time was World War 2 and Italy had just surrendered to the Allies. The winning side. This spells a better hope for the future of his people and to finally achieve peace on his lands but despite this, he has never been more miserable in his long eternity. He misses Germany. He misses the soft platinum blond hair, which looked better when it's not slicked back, and the azure blue eyes which expressed hidden emotions. Nowadays, instead of a reluctant hug and an embarrassed smile, Germany greeted him with a fierce look that promised pain and suffering and a stray bullet or two. This scared him. Not the bullets, since he heal fast, but the sudden change in the stoic man. The Germany he met in the battlefield these days were not the Germany he left not so long ago. He has become colder and more shut off from the world, bent on leading his people to an almost non-existent victory. It was a matter of time before the Axis will lose and Germany knows that. Italy could see it swimming in those clear azure eyes during their brief scuffle on the battlefield, along with anguish, determination, and grief. Anguish, for the people that were slaughtered in the name of purity. Determination, to lead his people to victory, and towards a better future than they had currently. Grief, for the sacrifice and countless lives that was killed on the field in his name.

There is no such thing as a winner in a war. Italy knows that more than anyone. It only brings grief and pain. What Italy would do to take him away from the grief of war. To take him and hide together until all the chaos passes. And that he will.

In the region of Veneto, 26th April 1945

Germany duck instinctively as a bullet whizzed near where his head was a few seconds ago. He heard a muffled thump behind him as the bullet that was meant for him, hit a body behind him. Germany heard the body slumped unto the unforgivable ground, lifeless. If it was in any other situation he would have stopped and checked, but no. This is war. Casualties are a norm on the field and he should be focussing on doing everything in his power to not let their sacrifices to waste. So, he persevered. He will win this. For the sake of… The sake… of… For who? For the sake of his people? There's no doubt in his mind that even his own people already hated him. For the sake of his boss? His boss was just a psychotic man with a sick dream for the future. Germany was repulsed by the ideals of his boss, but it was still his duty as a country to follow orders. So… the question still remains. Who am I fighting for? What am I fighting for?

He shook the thought out of his head. Now wasn't the time to think about this. He should just continue following orders and be a perfect obedient country. He tried refocusing his mind back to the battle, and just in time too, as an enemy soldier tried to assault him from behind. The soldier put up a good fight but it was short lived as he was obviously stronger as he is a country. The body of the enemy slowly fell down, lifeless, in front of him with a barely audible thump.

He kept moving forward, ignoring the dead body at his feet, and kept on shooting and killing every enemy on sight, like a well-oiled war machine. The ground he walked on squelched as the blood mixed with the earth and rubble from the ruins. The buildings of the town they were fighting were now in ruins. There was nothing left to indicate it's past beauty. The blond male remembered when he visited this town a few years back, admiring the architecture, the people, and overall country, both the land and the representation. At the thought of the said representation, flashes of red hair, amber-gold eyes and soft tan skin zipped through his mind. He shook the thought out of his mind with great difficulty. His hand shook in frustration as he continued on fighting. Why… Why must I do this? Why must I hurt/destroy the very heart of North Italy? His friend…(?) No… He was much more than a friend…

The thought of Italy in pain suddenly overtook Germany's and his movements faltered. That was all it took for the enemy soldiers to lodge a few bullets deep in his chest. He felt himself fall slowly to the dirty ground as the pain form the bullets slowly flared. As he fell he could have sworn he heard a voice calling his name. It was a voice he had not heard in a long time. It was a voice that brought him happiness and pain. It was a voice he tried so hard to forget, but in vain. He thoroughly missed that voice. As he lay there on the bloody ground, he tried to search for the owner of the voice through his blurred vision, and there he was. Italy. He was standing a few feet away. His eyes were wide in shock and he stood there dumbfounded. In the next split second, Germany saw the Italian's face contort to something that he has never seen on the Italian's face. Anger.

The blood loss must have made him delusional as he suddenly saw Italy fought the three soldiers that were making their way towards the blond male. He fought all of them at the same time and actually won. After making sure that the three soldiers were dead, Germany saw Italy making his way towards him. He came down on his knees and sat right next to the blond's body and stared right into the azure eyes. For once, Italy's eyes were wide open and Germany could see the soft honey-amber colour staring sadly back at him. That was all Germany could see through his limited vision as his consciousness slowly slipped away. In the murkiness that was his mind, he could hear Italy's faint voice calling his name. His actual name. Not the name of his country.

"Ludwig…"

He could hear the battle happening in his capitol in the back of his mind. He could feel the tempest of emotions that his people were feeling. His gut was telling- no, shouting, at him to join in, and fight for his country, but he just didn't have the heart to leave the sleeping blond male alone. He's been asleep for 2 days now and Italy has been fatefully staying by his side, rarely leaving for food and rest. He was afraid that the blond will wake up alone and distraught. He sat beside the bed the blond male was occupying. Occasionally Italy would hold the larger man's hand and slowly sing to him.

Again, Italy could hear the distant boom of a bomb in the battlefield far, far away and his land was calling for him to fight. He shook it off and continued staring at the sleeping German. After saving Germany Italy had brought the man to one of his remote home, far, far away from the frontlines. Not many knew about this house and the Allies didn't need to know about Germany. Not yet, at least. He shuddered at the thought of what they would do to him if they knew.

Germany's breath was shallow but even. The bullet wounds were healing, albeit more slowly than it should. Germany's land must be receiving a lot of damage if his healing rate was slowing down to this extent. Usually it would have taken less than a day for wounds like this to heal. Italy watched as Germany's chest rise and fall as he was slowly swallowed up by his thoughts.

Rise. Fall. Rise. Fall. It was almost like a trance, slowly swallowing him whole. Italy was so occupied that he almost didn't notice the twitch on Germany's face as he slowly open his eyes. The blond male tried to move but instead cringed in pain. Italy immediately took hold of the larger man's and laid him back down on the bed. He could feel the German tense as he slowly analysed his surroundings.

"Ludwig… Are you alright?" Italy slowly asked the blond male. Germany relaxed his body a bit and looked towards the red head. "Ja, I'm… alright… But where…?" He said with great difficulty.

"Relax." Italy said calmly. "You're in one of my house. None of the Allies know you're with me. You're safe…" Italy tried to sooth the German's emotion by rubbing his thumb over the blond's hand. The next few minutes were filled with utter silence as both occupants mull over on what to say to each other. Their previous encounters weren't exactly on friendly terms. Finally, the German broke the silence.

"What day is it?" Germany's voice was a bit fainter than it usually was and lacks the usual power his words usually have. Italy felt a bit sad at this and frowned slightly as he answered. "28th April. You were out for 2 days." The red head heard a sharp intake of breath coming from the large blond as he said that. Italy saw the blond gripping the bed sheets, making his knuckle turn white. "Your wounds… They were healing extremely slow…" He continued explaining.

"2 days…" Italy heard him muttered in disbelief. "I-I have to get back… They will search for me…" The blue eyes male started sit up, but barely made it as he winced in pain. His hands immediately went to his bandaged chest. "You are in no shape to fight… You can't even get out of the bed, much less fighting…" He muttered quietly as they locked eyes.

"You need to stay and recover. You'll only agitate the bullet wounds if you move."

"But my people need me! I-I need to go back out there! Fighting! Not to lay around doing nothing!" The blond kept on insisting. A loud slap resounded in the near empty room. A red mark was slowly appearing on the pale blond's face. For the second time, Germany saw Italy's face scrunched up in anger, as he shouted, "YOU'RE NOT 'DOING NOTHING', LUDWIG!" Germany only stared in shock towards Italy. He never thought the Italian could even get angry. Then the Italian continues in a much more subdued voice. "You're recovering. You're healing. More importantly, you are resting. This is more important than any other fight. Don't forget. Although we nations can heal fast, we can still… die." Italy choked out the last word painfully as tears started to appear, his face morphed to a more miserable expression. Pure despair emanate from those golden pools that was his eyes. "So, don't say that you are doing nothing." Tears slowly fell from those golden orbs, leaving trails on his creamy skin.

The fact that Italy had slapped him was totally erased as he saw Italy cried. "Italy…" Germany called softly to Italy. "Feliciano… Look at me." Italy slowly brought his face up when Germany called him by his name. "I'm still needed by my people. Unless I'm incapacitated I need to continue fighting. It is my duty as a country, to give my all…" The German said softly, while wiping away the stray tears from Feliciano's eyes.

Italy grabbed the hand that was on his cheek let it go. He stood and walked away, his back facing the bed. Germany could see his shoulder shaking with held back sobs. The red head slowly turns; his face passive and blank as he faced the blond male.

"Then answer me Ludwig… What of the duty you have for yourself? Do you think it's okay for you to die? What are you fighting for, Ludwig? Your people? Your Führer? You yourself should know your people want nothing more than for this war to end. Your Führer is only grabbing at straws with his efforts in trying to turn the favours towards him. I know that you know you are fighting a losing battle. So, why all this bloodshed? Why do you continue to hurt yourself?"

As Feliciano's words slowly sink in, it was the German's turn to be angry. The blond fix the red head with his the coldest glare "You have no right…" He said slowly at first. Then his voice suddenly rose, "You have absolutely no right to talk about my people like that. Especially someone who runs away at every sign of danger despite having the ability to fight back. If what I saw on the battlefield was correct, then, you obviously can fight, yet you pretend to be weak and run away with the first sign of battle. You are nothing more than a coward." Italy flinched at the last word, but he was adamant on making the German stay. He needed to save the German from signing his own death wish. Italy clenched his hands into fists at his side and stared defiantly towards the cold glare of the German.

"Despite how I look, the fact is that I'm still older than you… So I've seen more wars than you. I've experienced losses that I still can't forget. Grandpa Rome slowly died as the war continued to tear his lands. Holy Ro-" Italy stopped short, face contorting into pain as he continued. "M-My first love was taken away from me because he went to war with France…" Italy let out a soft dark chuckle. "Did you know, out of all of the nations, I have seen the most death of our kind… So I'm sorry if I am a coward. Yes, I admit it. I'm coward. I'm a coward for hating war. I'm a coward for not wanting any more bloodshed and sacrifice. And I'm a coward to actually want my precious person to live another day. If that is your definition of a coward, Ludwig, then I'm proud to be one."

Liquid golden eyes stared hard into the azure pools of the German. Italy could see that the German falter a bit but there was still a little stubbornness in his eyes. Italy quickly made his way back to Ludwig's side and cupped the blond's face. "Mio dio, Ludwig. Just stay. Please. You're safe here. You don't have to fight anymore. Just stay here with me. I- I don't want to lose you. I don't want to be alone anymore…" Feliciano immediately broke down and Ludwig automatically reached out towards the Italian and pulled him into a tight hug. The German slowly caress the red hair, trying to soothe the sobs of the Italian. After the sobs slowed down a bit Ludwig said softly into Feliciano's ear. "Danke, Italien. For loving me… But I still have to fight…" The German could feel Italy's body tense around him, so he quickly continued, "But I'll stay with you… At least until the wound heals." The smaller man's body relaxed a bit when he heard that and he slowly brought his head up to look at the azure eyes. "Why must you German be so stubborn…?"

The Italian's eyes were red from crying but he gave the German a small smile and in turn, the German gave the little Italian one of his rare smiles. They hugged once more, both not wanting to let go of the other. Feliciano whispered into Ludwig's ear. "Go to sleep. You need to rest more. I'll be right beside you…" The Italian let go and made his way to sit on the chair beside the bed but the blond quickly grabbed his sleeve. Feliciano look back towards Ludwig, who was looking away, with a blush on his face. "You sleep too. You're also tired, right? So… sleep beside me…" Ludwig then lay back on the bed and faced the other way, avoiding the Italian's amused gaze. Ludwig felt the bed dipped as Italy slipped in under the covers with him. After Italy had finally settled in he felt Feliciano's arm encircled him from behind. Before he could protest, Italy whispered, "I know, you're the one who usually hugs me, but you're apparently injured. So let me hug you instead, kay…" Ludwig just shrugged as sleep slowly consumed him. In the fuzziness of his mindscape he heard the Italian sing softly in his ears. The arm that was around him was warm and dragged him deeper into slumber.

The morning light slowly crept into the room, lighting it up a bit. One of the two occupants of the room slowly opens his eyes, revealing the amber-gold irises. He smiled softly as he noticed his situation. It was one of those rare moments where Italy woke up earlier than Germany and Italy was still hugging the larger man. He snuggled in the German's golden locks as he inhale the German's scent. Everything was peaceful, until Italy suddenly felt Germany tensed. "What's wrong, Ludwig?" Germany turned so the he was facing Italy. "I- I don't know… I suddenly felt a rush of emotions…? Italy, could you…?"

"I'll try…But we're pretty far out… The chance of us getting any information is very little… But I'll try." He got out of bed and made way to the phone downstairs. He dialled a certain number but no one seemed to pick up. He tried several other numbers and they all ended with the same result. They were pretty far away from the frontlines, so asking the people in town for news would be fruitless. So he made his way back up and told Ludwig that there he couldn't get any news and instead, asked him what he wants for breakfast. The rest of the day passed by quickly with both of them enjoying each other's company. They slept together again that night. Italy's warmth dragged Germany off to a deep sleep, oblivious to what's happening on the outside.

Germany woke up the next day with a sense of dread washing over him. He sat up slowly, trying not to wake the Italian. The feeling he got yesterday was brought back to the forefront of his mind again as he tries to the puzzle pieces together. He knows it has something to do with his country, but he just didn't know what. As he was mulling over the facts, the red head slowly stirred. "Mmm… Ludwig… You're awake…" Italy gave Germany a little smile and Germany gave a little smile of his own at the childish antics of the Italian. Suddenly Germany gripped his chest as it seared with pain. Italy immediately became alert and asked whether Germany was alright but Ludwig was far too lost in the haze of pain to comprehend what Feliciano was saying. The pain wasn't from the bullet wounds as they were completely healed. So that just leaves his land. Something happened in Germany that resulted in the excruciating pain that Ludwig felt right now.

Italy was panicking as Germany double over in pain. He felt useless. He couldn't do anything to help Ludwig except offer a few comforting words. He heard the phone ringing downstairs. He felt guilty leaving Ludwig alone but the call might explain why Germany was in pain. He picked up the phone and immediately heard the voice of England on the other side of the line. "Hello? Italy? Where the bloody hell have you been the past few days? I barely found this number!"

"Uh…Hello England. I've been… around… And I got injured, a bit. So I stayed at one of my older residence…" Italy heard the Brit grumble. "Humph. Well, I called to tell you that Germany's forces surrendered yesterday. And we just got news that that crazy boss of Germany killed himself today. Se we need you to…" Whatever the Brit said afterwards was faded to the background as he quickly said a quiet thanks and hung up.

Italy ran up the stairs and rushed towards Ludwig who was slowly recovering. Ludwig slowly looked up to Feliciano, awaiting the news he knew he'll dread. Italy softly repeated what the Brit said on the phone to Ludwig. Feliciano could see that with every word he uttered, Ludwig's composure slowly broke down brick by brick. Now Italy could clearly see all those pent up grief and anguish, bare, for all to see. Italy did what he could to comfort the German. He held Ludwig in his arms like a small child. The large man seemed so small now, as the flood of emotions tore through him, leaving a hollow version the man he previously was, in Italy's arm. Italy sang to the German to calm him and the German slowly fell into a fitful sleep.

The next day, Ludwig requested, with a dead look in his eyes, that Italy bring him to the Allies so that they can finalise the surrender. Italy reluctantly agreed. Germany spent the rest of the day staring into nothingness. Ludwig entered his room, intending to sleep alone that night. He locked the Italian out and Italy could hear the muffled sob coming from the room. The red head sat outside the blond's door and waited for the sob to die down. When everything was finally quiet, he took out the spare key and unlocked the door. Ludwig was sleeping fitfully on the bed, scowling and muttering bits of words in German. Feliciano quietly slipped in next to the blond and wrapped his hands around the large man. The blond almost instantaneously relaxed into his embrace and the scowl disappeared. Italy smiled and quietly whispered to Ludwig.

"My arms are always open… Remember that… Ludwig…" Feliciano softly whispered, and kissed the soft blond hair.

*owari*

The German forces surrendered on 29th April 1945 in Italy, and Hitler killed himself on the 30th. Well according to Wiki anyway~

Translation:

Mio dio – My God

Danke, Italien – Thank you, Italia.