Getting ready for my next story, this is now another parody. Until I get more ideas for my own original idea, I'll write this. I'll get the disclaimers out of the way first. I don't own Fullmetal Alchemist and I don't own the Little Mermaid. All songs are copyright their respective writers.

It was night and a hush had fallen over the woods just outside Dublith. The birds were no longer chirping as they settled down for the night, the squirrels and other fuzzy woodland creatures nestled in their burrows. All was quiet and all was calm…as long as you didn't stray too close to Dante's mansion. A noise that wasn't to be believed was issuing from the large building, sending any small animals that happened to be nearby running. The noise echoed throughout the mansion causing discomfort, annoyance, and downright anger in most cases. The disturbance was in the form of Wrath. He was all wound up, as he usually is, and was jumping around his room yelling and hollering and playing some obscure game that only he knew the rules, or objective, too. Normally the other homunculi and Dante would just ignore him, but he'd been going on for five straight hours and everyone was just about fed up. Finally, as Wrath knocked over his dresser, tempers snapped.

"That's it! I can't stand it anymore!" Envy screamed, tugging at his long hair. "If that kid doesn't shut the hell up I'm going to tear him apart myself!"

Lust, who was sitting nearby, legs crossed one foot tapping incessantly, her hair looking slightly frizzed, said, "Envy you're not making this better by yelling yourself, so do us all a favor and shut up."

Envy turned on Lust and said, "You can't tell me that brat isn't annoying you too I can see it!"

"Of course he's annoying me!" Lust yelled out, her voice unusually high. "But the only thing worse than his high pitched giggle is your gravelly whining!"

"Gravelly?!?!? How dare you talk about me like that?"

"I'll talk to you anyway I want too Palm Tree!"

"Oh isn't that original! I've only heard Greed call me that about a thousand times you big tittied slut!"

Before Lust could reply with a scathing remark, Dante appeared in the drawing room and said, "I've sent Sloth to shut him up, so if you'd both kindly shut up, I'd be grateful."

She left, leaving Lust and Envy feeling slightly sheepish and a tiny bit cowed.

Sloth didn't waste any time in getting to Wrath's room. She opened the door and grabbed Wrath's foot as he went jumping by. She tossed him playfully onto his bed and said, "It's time for bed dear."

"I'm not tired! I don't want to sleep!" Wrath protested, getting ready to jump up again.

Sloth sat down next to him and held up a book. "How would you like me to read you a story?"

"Oooh! What's it about?"

Sloth, to tell the truth, had no idea. She'd just picked a book out of the library at random. Considering most of Dante's books were about alchemy, Sloth looks down at the title with some trepidation. She cocked an eyebrow as she read the title.

'Dante's Twisted Fairy Tales?' she thought to herself.

"Well? What's it about!" Wrath yelled.

"It's a book of fairy tales." Sloth explained. "Stories that paint a wondrous picture of a fantasy world unlike our own, one where magic exists and happy endings reign."

"BORING!" Wrath yelled out, jumping up again. "Boring, boring, boring, boring!"

Sloth grabbed him again and forced him back to the bed, less playfully this time. "How about you give it a chance before you call it boring?"

Wrath whined a little, but crawled mournfully under the covers and waited for the story. Sloth grabbed a nearby chair and opened the book. She was startled as she read the names of the characters in these stories. She saw Envy's name, Edward's name, Hughes' name, even her own name! She was downright disturbed when she saw a hand drawn picture of Scar in a dress with a caption that read, "Poor Scar was left to clean the floors as his wicked step brothers Envy and Greed went to the ball."

"Okay, that's just creepy."

"What's creepy?"

"Nothing!" She quickly turned the page before her "son" was scarred by the horrific imagery. Obviously Dante had taken the old fairy tales and replaced the characters with people from real life. That woman had too much time on her hands…Nevertheless; Sloth turned to a promising looking story entitled The Little Mermaid. She quickly flipped through a few pages to be absolutely sure there were no pictures of men in drag. Luckily, this story was clean. She cleared her throat and began to tell the story.

Just outside the door, Envy had a glass pressed against the door to hear what was going on in Wrath's room. Whatever had shut him up must be worth listening too…

"What are you doing?" a sardonic voice asked him.

Envy jumped and turned around, his surprise turning to anger when he saw Greed standing behind him.

"What I'm doing is none of your damn business!" Envy snarled.

Greed smirked and said, "I knew you were a creepy cross dresser Palm Tree, but I didn't know you liked to spy on little kids. My, what strange things you get your kicks from."

Envy pelted the glass at Greed which shattered on his head. "If I was spying on him why would I be using a glass?!?!?!?"

"Keep it down! Wrath is finally quiet and I just put Gluttony to bed!" Lust said, leaving Gluttony's room.

"He started it!" Envy said, pointing at Greed.

Greed held up his hands in defense and said, "Hey, whatever. I was on my way out anyway."

He slipped his shades on and turned to go to his room. As soon as his door was closed, Envy crouched back down and held up a spare glass to the door, listening again. Lust rolled her eyes and was about to go back downstairs when Envy said, "Hey, I think she's talking about that blonde girl."

Lust stopped and turned her head back to look at Envy. "What?"

"You know, what's her name…" He listened a little bit and said, "Winry that was it."

Lust's eyes narrowed. Oh, she remembered Winry all right. That disgusting little brat that had ruined all her pictures…her secret closet pictures…

"Let me hear." Lust said pushing Envy over and stealing the glass.

"Hey! This was my idea!" He said angrily.

"Shhh! I think she's telling a story." Lust said.

Envy pulled out a third glass and pressed it against the door, sniggering.

"A story about Winry? This should be good…"

That's the first chapter, short but it is just setting up the story after all. Please review and don't bother flaming, because I just ignore them.