MS: Oh god I don't know what I'm doing. I was screwing around on youtube watching Lisbug and Shane Dawson videos and their sheer retardedness suddenly made me want to write a Beyblade drunk fic. Crap. No, I myself right now am not intoxicated; that would probably help me make this funnier, but unfortunately it is finals week for the rest of this week and all of the next. Balls. Oh well, I'm hoping you guys will give this little fic a chance anyways.

It's going to feature all of the teams, and before you jump to conclusions no I do not currently know the pairings; just that there won't be yaoi. So stay tuned for drunken hilarity and feel free to leave me a review with an idea or a request you have for a character! :) THANKS GUYSSS.

Disclaimer: I do not own Beyblade or any of its characters! Nor do I own the plot from any comedy-genre drunken movies if any are referenced here without me noticing :)

"I can't believe they're letting us do this."

"Well technically they're not..."

"Don't remind me."

Tala shifted his eyes from side to side, eyeing the various stragglers who were picking up last-minute booze and wine before the store closed. He was really hoping no one was going to recognize any of them because really, the BBA got in enough hot shit over Ian cursing on live tv and Ming Ming's sex tape leak. Plus there was Oliver coming out; and the trial with Voltaire and Boris which had been the main reason in the first place that Tala found himself, Bryan, Kai, Johnny, Dunga and Kevin in the secluded aisles of a back-alley liquor store with four cartfuls of alcohol.

All the beyblading world needed was a snapshot of its celebrities armed with tequila and a metric ton of beer to set off another round of fireworks.

Kevin leaned over into the ancient-looking cooler and pulled a few more six-packs to the front by the plastic rings. "Is anybody staring yet...?"

The red-haired member of the Majestics threw a glance over his shoulder. Just some old woman in the soupstock aisle and a middle-aged man who no doubt got bitched into buying tampons for his lady friend. 'What the fuck are you looking at grandma?'

Johnny shook his head. "Nah, nobody."

As Kevin finished filling his cart with the six-packs Dunga's fingers tapped impatiently on the handles of his own.

"Hurry up boys, it's gonna be hard enough sneaking this much booze into the hotel."

Kai crossed his arms. "I'm not saying I don't want to carry through with the plan; for fucks sake we could all use a drink."

Tala looked at his friend. "There's a 'but' coming."

"But..." The phoenix beyblader shot a glance toward the old, crusted over cashier and sighed. "We're going to get caught. That's an imminent thing; probably before we even get back to the rooms."

Bryan shrugged his shoulders and turned his cart toward the check-out line.

"Who gives a damn? This morning's Star cover featured Raul picking his underwear out of his ass. We're going to get photographed no matter what we do; we might as well be drunk enough for one night not to care."

Tala snorted. "It's his own fault for wearing those fucking leotards."

"Would you guys just shut up and get in line? The quicker we get out the door and back in the van, the sooner we can get this shit back to the hotel." The little green-haired douche had a point, so the guys shuffled their carts into place in the check-out line.

Johnny leaned against the side of a candy stand and watched lazily as the cashier made faces at enough alcohol to pollute a school of nuns. "Somebody remind me why the BBA is doin' this again...?"

"Inter-... International somethin' somethin'."

Bryan rolled his eyes at Kevin's stupidity. "International unification. At least that's what the blonde one called it."

Kai opened his wallet and forked over whereabouts of $400. "Judy; Max's mother."

"Whatever."

Dunga grabbed a pack of Maltesers off the rack by Johnny and slung them onto the beltline along with his purchases. "Might as well get a snack to go with it..."

Tala rolled his eyes. "You're going to turn into a fat sack of shit if you eat that garbage."

"It ain't fat it's muscle; and by the way, how are we gettin' everyone drunk anyways? The hotel is supplying most of the catering and you know Dickenson's rules: 'Public appearance right now is everything.'" The burly Saint Shield handed over $330; plus $2 for his chocolate balls.

At this, Tala smirked.

"Oliver and Ray are making 'jello desserts' and sweet tea."

Dunga shrugged. "Nobody is gonna eat enough fucking jello to get drunk Tala."

The redhead's grin only grew.

"We're spiking the punch."

Soon all the carts were bused through the check-out and the guys had to be quick about loading everything in the van. Once everything was packed neatly, Kai climbed into the drivers' seat and they began the trip back to the hotel.

Kevin shifted around on his seat to look at all the goods. "Man that is a lot of alcohol..."

"And it better be all gone by the next morning."

Bryan laughed at Tala's statement. "I certainly hope all the little ones can handle their liquor; I'm not cleaning up anybody's throw-up."

Johnny crossed his arms behind his head. "I wonder who's gonna get with who..."

Dunga raised an eyebrow. "You crushin' on somebody or what?"

The Majestic shrugged. "Nothing wrong with having a bit of drunk fun."

Kai sighed. "Just try and act normal until eight tomorrow night. That's when Mr. Dickenson, Judy and the coaches have to head back to their in-service. Then we can break out everything besides the punch, the tea and the jello."

"Aye aye." Kevin saluted Kai with two fingers and the act reminded Kai so much of Tyson that he had to resist the urge to roll his eyes.

"I hope you all realize that half of these people have probably never drank before in their lives. I'll be shocked if they even make it to eight with the punch alone."

Bryan chuckled again. "Personally I can't wait to see the little one with the computer on the sauce. That ought to be entertaining."

Tala nodded. "Maybe Brooklyn will lose the stick up his ass if he manages to get drunk."

"Maybe Garland will get pissed off and punch Tyson in the face again."

Even Kai laughed at that one and by now, no one could hide the fact that they were almost childishly excited for the next evening to begin. Press conference, then supper, then party; it was simple. All the teams plus all the liquor was sure to equal something special; Tala was sure of it.

"Get a good night's sleep, boys... You're gonna need it."

MS: Thanks for reading everyone, now review review review and we'll see what drunken shenanigans all of our favorite beybladers are going to get into! ;)