I do not own Bleach. This is a oneshot. If you want more, review and I may make another few chapters.
A/N: Ichigo will try to be more wiser or at least more aware and mature in this (hopefully you see that). Spoilers for a part of the Thousand Year Blood War!
Ichigo felt himself almost floating, but it didn't make sense. Everywhere he looked was a purplish black that curled and twisted. He had heard Orihime's voice earlier and tried to react but couldn't. Trying to force himself to move didn't help either. So, he thought. Not about his situation but about his zanpakuto and reiatsu. People always thought that because he had such a large reiatsu and he couldn't feel a lot of the more repressed or smaller ones that he couldn't feel any others. And to keep others from making a fuss, he let them think that. It actually was pretty helpful in fights. But that wasn't about Zangetsu. Ichigo knew there was something wrong with the old man. Something itched in his skin when he held the blade. It was comfortable and it was a part of his soul and it felt right, like it fit with him, still his and a blade that was part of him, but he felt something was wrong. It curled in him like a bug and burrowed in him. It was the reiatsu. The reiatsu was strange. It was his, but not. The blade always felt a little strange in his hand, like there was wrapping paper covering the blade. As if something was trying to reach out to him through the blade but could never reach him. And the scary part was that he had an idea of what was going on.
He always felt complete when the hollow was around, when they were clashing blades and slashing flesh. The blade reacted stronger when it clashed with the hollow's and that wrapping paper type reiatsu around the blade thickened and that weird feeling in the blade strained even harder trying to reach him. Gritting his teeth as best he could, Ichigo knew he needed to talk to the pair in his inner world. Slowly pulling his eyes closed, he struggled to pull himself into the blade, in sync with it like Urahara had told him when he was so new to the spiritual world. And then with a gut-wrenching yank.
Somehow, rain hit his face but he ignored it as his eyes flashed open. Cold covered his legs up to his knees and he yelped, glancing down. Water. My inner world is flooded. Am I that miserable? Glancing around, he looked at the pole that the old man usually stood on. Nothing. Narrowing his eyes, Ichigo shouted, "Old man! Old man! I need to talk to you!" He waited a moment, then flared his reiatsu in a way that shook the dull buildings. A few seconds later, the sound of cloth hit his ears. He turned to stare in to the dull amber sunglasses of his inner world resident. The black cloaked man stood in front of him, watching. He seemed to wait for Ichigo to speak. "Who are you?" That one sentence. It made the man's eyes widen only a fraction of a centimeter, but Ichigo knew what he saw and it made him cold and sad.
"What do you mean, Ichigo?" And that question was all it took for the orange head to want to hurt the old man. Because now, his heart hurt. The one who he believed he could rely on was going to lie to him? And they said you were supposed to be partners. There was a faint shocked expression on the old man's face, the first he'd ever seen besides the day that they had met. Ichigo realized he must have muttered it out loud. "I never lied to you." Came the rugged voice and Ichigo was very tempted to believe the old man, but his gut was telling to press forward and he did.
"Then, who are you? Explain," he materialized his bankai and thrust it out, hearing the rain 'pinging' against it lightly and his voice icy cold, "this then, if you will. I am not as bad a reiatsu sensor as everyone makes me out to be, old man." Ichigo stared 'Zangetsu' in the eyes and was only half surprised to see pain and sorrow. The falling rain made it hard to look around but he could see him perfectly fine. There was the swishing of cloth and the old man was next to him. Warm, half calloused hands wet with the chilly rains held the blade around where his own hands held it and Ichigo twitched in shock.
"I never lied to you, Ichigo. I have told you only true things, things that have guided you only half way. I am a part of you. I would never lie about that. But...I am not truly a zanpakuto. I may take the form of one, and you can wield that form, but I am not a zanpakuto spirit." Ichigo stiffened, gripping the blade tighter. "I only know some of the whole truth whilest others know the whole, but I will tell you what I know. And no, I will not hold anything back." Ichigo nodded haltingly and the rain let up, only a tiny bit though. The water around his knees was not rising like he expected it to. He made a gesture for him to continue. "You know your father is a Shinigami. Your mother, she was a Quincy. As am I, a manifestation of those Quincy powers." Ichigo felt his heart constrict and a wild panic ripple through him.
"What?! How?! Why did he keep this from me, my own father?! I bet Urahara knew, and Yoruichi too! Damn it!" He snarled. Too much heart hurt. Why didn't they tell me before?! Why?! "Why didn't you tell me this before?! Who the hell's Zangetsu then?!" The warm hands squeezed his own almost too hard and Ichigo realized the old man probably was feeling very shitty right now - but he was supposed to. He'd lied.
"I am not here to hurt or help you, Ichigo. I...I originally did not want you to be a Shinigami. It, as you have found, to be a hard path, full of struggles and suffering and hurts. I didn't want that for you. It is why I chose to try and suppress your growth potential and I tried - and half succeeded - to be the core of your power. To make it hurt more, I was never the one to truly teach you how to use a zanpakuto. That was the Hollow's power. As was nearly every time you were deathly injured, it was him, not me." Ichigo trembled lightly. Thunder crashed with such severity that the old man flinched. Ichigo dropped his bankai and unleashed as much reiatsu as he could, just to let out the anger and the raw feelings howling in his chest.
'Zangetsu' stumbled back, actually unable to keep his footing in such a maelstrom of power and rage that was erupting. Buildings collided and shook, crashing and shattering. Why did they lie to me?! Why did he not tell me who he was?! Did he not trust me?! My mother...A Quincy...damn it! He released more reiatsu. It flowed out of him, crushing, writhing, twisting and destroying. It represented his complete rage and sorrow. The rain splashed like waves down on their heads, soaking them beyond clothes into bone. Ichigo didn't care for a while and let loose hell on his inner world. But soon it was gone and only hints of it were left, replaced with a strange calm and alertness. Ichigo ran a hand through his hair, and having calmed down began wondering why it was that his dad hadn't told him. But the old man's not off the hook. He should have told me.
With that, the orangette turned halfway to the black clothed man and stared out through the heavy dousing and faint rumblings of thunder that were disappearing and the flood that had started to grow to his hips and then as he let go of his feelings, the flood quietly receded to his toes. Damn. I did a number on it. His inner world was utterly destroyed except for the skyscraper he stood on. The rest was pieces of glass and thick shards of metal and chunks of stone. 'Zangetsu' was staring at the remains of the skyscrapers.
"If you do that to Aizen, I am quite sure we will win in ten minutes flat." Ichigo's jaw dropped. Did he just make a joke? At a time like this? No- what the hell is he doing making a joke in the first place?! "Ichigo. Pick up your jaw." He looked at the older spirit. He was just as stoic as before but he gave off an aura of almost embarrassment.
"Either you spend too much time with me or some horrible way you've picked up the hollow's sense of humor - it shows you probably picked his, old man. Especially when you make a god damn joke at this time!'' Now, 'Zangetsu' stared at him.
"I was not joking. I am completely serious." Ichigo rubbed his forehead, growing serious.
"Whatever. We can talk about your weird joking later, I guess. Why is it you didn't tell me about you not being a zanpakuto spirit when I met you besides the fact that you wanted to be the core of my power?!" 'Zangetsu' shook his head in silence, the only weapon he had left to hide his secrets and now that they were gone, even the silence couldn't hold back what was here. The reasons he had given were his reasons. Horrible, terrible reasons, but it was all he had. It was almost as if he didn't want to disappoint Ichigo - and he realized he didn't. The child had grown on him as a son. Nothing could be said to explain.
"I have given you my reasons. There is nothing else I can say to make you understand. Those are my reasons." 'Zangetsu' spoke icily, hesitation barely noticeable. But Ichigo narrowed his eyes at him, knowing his blank demeanor was false as his reasons for doing what he did. Sighing angrily, Ichigo closed his eyes and then looked softly at 'Zangetsu'.
"You are still Zangetsu." The old man stared at him, real and true shock alive in his features.
"But...I am a Quincy. I am not a zanpakuto." Ichigo snorted, looking straight into the older man's eyes.
"You're still a manifestation of power, aren't you? You can be a Quincy and have a manifestation as a zanpakuto as well. You've been doing that before, ossan." Zangetsu peered at him for another second before giving his own small sigh.
"You are set on this?" Ichigo grinned at him, teeth unknowingly partly barred. The orange haired hybrid gave a bit of a laugh, brown eyes determined and quick.
"Have you not seen me decide something before, ossan? I've done some crazy shit because I've been stubborn. If I say it, I mean it. You are a part of Zangetsu and always will be - a part of me. Besides, you can't just leave me here with the other wack-job. I'd go nuts - if I'm not already." He grinned again. Ichigo noticed that the water was receding faster, the buildings slowly starting to come back. Zangetsu dipped his head and Ichigo felt pure relief from his Quincy partner.
"Then we must talk. I have to explain things to you." The old man said. He moved a bit closer to Zangetsu as the black cloaked man began to talk. "Your Quincy powers, me, are derived from your mother. But the hollow, Zangetsu, your zanpakuto, is created from a being known as White, a hollow. I reviewed the memories that were sent through the bond. Your mother was attacked and bitten by White while protecting your father, who is a Soul Reaper. White had a substance in him that allowed a being to go through Hollowfication." Ichigo's eyes went wide, horrified. "She was being transformed and was brought to Urahara's, who managed to bind your father and mother's souls together to keep her from Hollowfication. Your father's spiritual powers kept White contained inside her being, which was passed onto you at birth. White mixed with your Shinigami power and that is why he is part of your zanpakuto, as Zangetsu."
"I found him after that, realized what he was, and kept him sealed tighter. But Ichigo, do you know who unleashed White?" Ichigo shook his head. He had a suspicion. "The man you call Aizen Souske." He grit his teeth and clenched his fist.
"How do you know?"
"Reshi memories. A Quincy manipulates the reiatsu and reshi in the world. Therefore, I can use it to sense and look through memories within the power. I used it on the reshi that was gathered here, with White and managed to get a glimpse of the hollow's memories. He was created by Aizen Souske as an experiment, kept here, in Hueco Mundo. I used it on the memories that contained the faintest hint of reshi from your mother and father to see what happened. White attacked your father, was attacked by your mother and then attacked and poisoned her with his Hollowfication ability, then self-destructed - a personal ability as well. Your mother, a few days later, began to Hollowfy. You know the rest." Ichigo bit his lip until it bled, his hands fisted tight, teeth gritted.
"Does...Zangetsu...know this?" He asked quietly. The old man answered.
"Call him forth and ask him yourself." Ichigo's eyes peered down before gathering his courage and whispered,
"Zangetsu. Come to me." Reiatsu grew around them until it was as thick as an ocean. Ichigo pushed it away from them with a single twitch of his own. Black and red reiatsu curled a few meters away. From it stepped a monster. A white hollow was there. It had bull like horns and his hollow mask with two black stripes down his forehead, one over each eye and cheek down to his chin and then one down either side of his throat to his collarbone. Red fur came from his collarbone, on either side and wrapping up around his neck. A hollow hole sat in the middle of his chest and black lines came from his collarbone and curved to touch his hollow hole. There were two lines on either side of his chest. He wore a pure white Shihakusho, lined in black with a black obi, but you could see he was muscular. Red tufts of fur curled at his wrists and ankles. He wore no socks or tabi because his feet were clawed, almost like a lizard's.
The place in the mask, however, where there were supposed to be eyes, there was nothing. Just darkness under the mask. Ichigo watched as the hollow-being materialized a blade of reiatsu and wasn't very, if at all, surprised that it lunged at him, sonido cracking under it's feet. Ichigo knew he had to do one thing, the one thing he dreaded to do: accept his hollow. Then he thought for half a second, of the things that Zangetsu - the hollow part - had actually done for him. He wasn't stupid. He actually was pretty observant, but he hadn't wanted to accept it before, so he had shoved it to the back of his mind. But Ichigo knew. He had seen. He knew that the one to save his life most of the time was Zangetsu. And frankly, he didn't care. He actually only didn't like the hollow because he threatened to take over his body and destroy his friends, which could be dealt with by fights every few months and spars in between.
He had to accept everything he was. But he still was the king, even if his zanpakuto was part hollow. He knew that Zangetsu - both manifestations - were just manifestations of himself. I won't ask you to help me anymore. I won't tell you to stay out of my way either. I won't ask you two to fight with me.
Welcome...Zangetsu...
And so the blade is me...
