Hi this is my first story criticism welcome and that's really it aside from this being my own AU (alternate universe) of the svtfoe episode Storm the castle.
3rd person pov
"STARRRR our lives are not worth a sandwich" Marco yelled as he pulled her tough the portal back into the Diaz household.
Your right Marco I'm sorry but hey we still got half of it she said smiling offering Marco a hug which he excepted.
Its ok Star want some nachos? He smiled
Star jumping up and down gleefully Of course, I do... nothing would go better with it then the half sandwich!
Marco went and made the nachos when all of the sudden he felt something hit his head.
Get him tough the portal now Toffee said smiling as his plan was coming together perfectly...
Star pranced in humming seeing a note left by Toffee and Ludo
Oh no Star said reading the note BRING YOUR WAND AND COME ALONE TO LUDOS CASTLE IF YOU EVER WANT TO SEE KARATE BOY AGAIN.
Marco pov
When I woke my head was hurting super bad and I could feel the blood running down my neck I was blindfolded and gaged soon I felt someone pull the blindfold off and sure enough there stands toffee looking all smug I tried to wiggle but it was no use.
So, you are probably wondering why I kidnaped you. toffee said as I glared daggers at him
Well you see star is more powerful than anyone thinks there is no chance on me getting her wand by attacking her daily. I had a confused look on my face
You really don't get it do you Marco? I shook my head no
She is stronger than the original 5 butterflies the only other queen even close was Eclipsa and if I kidnap you she will move heaven and earth to get you back after all the blood moon bound you two. he said putting the blindfold back on and leaving the room
Stars pov
I grabbed my wand and dimensional scissors and went to Ludo's castle the more I thought about Marco the madder I got and finally I felt my mewberty wings grow but they were gold I looked at them that's new and I realized I was all gold as I flew for Ludo's castle I fired a giant gold beam of energy which destroyed the whole front wall I flew in and landed in front off toffee
He was clapping good job princess you fi-
WHERE IS MY BOYFRIEND I started calming down
I mean where is Marco he smirked and I got so infuriated I flew up and fired another golden beam directly into him melting him to mush I floated down and looked at Marco untying him
3rd person pov
Marco looked at her did she just call me her boyfriend omg this can't be happening he said all happy in his head.
So I suppose you heard that Star said blushing
Yeah Star I did I didn't know you liked me marco said
Well I was going to ask you out but someone got kidnaped Star said smirking
Marco hugged Star lets go home he said
Hey Marco
Yeah Star
Would you be my boyfriend
Yes Star I would love that
Off in another dimension eclipse sat smiling its time I pay them a visit she said as her crystal started to break...
And that's it I hope you enjoy if you want me to continue it message me untill next time my dudes.