Hello, my lovely readers! I am, if I do say so myself, rather proud of this fic. For my humor readers, there is humor. For my drama readers, good Lord, is there drama. (mostly at the end.) To clue you in, in every single one of my stories, when I put things into the third person, they get serious (pun intended). This fic is after Bella is changed—and the ideas were all formed BEFORE BREAKING DAWN. So any similar factoids are purely coincidental. But there aren't many. It is about when Bella is in need of a bit more training, so they move up to Denali for a bit. And who's there but Tanya? T is for Tanya, T is for trouble. Sorry it took so long for me to write it, but I'm writing something else that I'll post when it's done. It's actually ludicrously long. And sorry this AN is so long!
So anyway, loyal readers, I now present to you for your stimulation and viewing pleasure:
Serious
EPOV
Things were good. After many tears while she was human and a bit of training after she was not, we were all happy. By this time, everyone had agreed that Bella was resembling Esme the most, with her sweet, girlish face and generous. We hadn't seen any particular powers, so we figured she must have brought some sort of concentrated personality trait.
But, with all the hardships, she was still simply the light of the family.
So, after an…interesting incident that ended with Bella having to make a fast exit through the roof of a shopping mall, we decided to pay a visit to the Denali clan for a while. She pouted a bid when Carlisle suggested it, claiming it was "only one mess-up."
This got me a bit worried, however (that we were going to see them.) I remember Bella's reaction when I told her of Tanya's advances. What I didn't say was that my rebuff didn't work very well. She simply ignored me, to my immense annoyance. There were many things Bella wouldn't like about Tanya, not least of them was the way she dressed. She could pass for a prostitute.
But anyway, there we were, in the car with Jasper and Alice. We were on our way, and naturally, I was driving. I had been contemplating how much Bella and Rosalie's friendship had progressed, but I'd long since moved on to looking at my beautiful wife. The frigid breeze toyed with her long dark hair. She felt my eyes on her and turned to face me with the soft smile she saves for me only.
Her expression soon turned to surprise, as did mine. Wild, high laughter sounded from the back. I turned to see Alice clutching her stomach in mirth. Before I could see what was going on in her mind, she said to Jasper,
"Distract…Edward…thoughts…"
Obediently Jasper began thinking my name over and over, so my mind automatically strayed to him. Between the seconds when my name was being called, I caught a few images—my shocked, surprised face, a fast swirl of Bella's hair, Tanya screaming, fire…
"Alice," I growled, "what did you see?"
Apparently she was still laughing too hard.
Well, it couldn't be too bad, if Alice was laughing, I reasoned. But then again, there was fire…I decided not to worry. Alice didn't have that sick of a sense of humor.
We finally pulled up to their not-so-humble abode. High up in the mountains was a modern-looking, wide-spread house. With black and silver as the main colors, it looked like a much more fitting haunt for vampires than ours.
I was sure that Bella would get along with everyone; Kate, Irina, Carmen, and Eleazar were quite friendly. Tanya, I hoped, would be the same when she saw Bella and I were married.
At times, this power is a curse—of course, upon hearing Tanya's thoughts, I saw that this meeting could not go well.
BPOV
Baby, I don't know when the danger cameI wanna find someone that I can blame
We pulled up to their house and walked up the way. Carmen, Eleazar, Kate, and Irina all welcomed us with hugs. I was introduced and felt very welcomed; they were all so nice. But I was confused. Where was Tanya?
As if in answer to my question, the door flew open. And there she was.
Just as Edward said, she had strawberry-blonde hair, shoulder length. She looked like a hooker, and walked swinging her hips excessively from side to side. She wore the single shortest skirt I'd ever seen, as well as strappy heels and a tube top that was much too small for my liking.
"Well, look who it is!" She trilled, throwing her arms out, exposing blood-red, talon-like nails. "Carlisle, Esme, how're things?" She shook their hands. "Rosalie, Emmett, always a pleasure!" She hugged them. "Jasper, Alice, welcome back!" She kissed them both and they both flinched slightly. "And…Edward," she purred lastly. She stood right in front of him now, and laid her claws—excuse me, hands—on his chest, apparently ignoring our clasped hands.
"I'm Bella. His wife." I introduced myself somewhat aggressively. All I knew was that I wasn't liking the looks of this hooch. Not at all.
Call the doctor cause I am sick in loveAnd I can't help it
EPOV
This couldn't turn out well. My sweet little Bella suddenly looked ferocious.
"Oh," Tanya sniffed in response. "Are you?"
"Yes." She said stiffly. I really didn't appreciate Tanya's hands on me, and it looked like Bella didn't either.
"Is this official?"
Bella's eyes turned black.
I felt it would be better for me to speak at this moment. "Yes, we're very happily married." I said, pushing her hands off me with my free one.
She observed Bella coolly. "Well, we'll see about that."
There was a very nasty silence in which Bella looked so vicious that I was starting to get scared.
Suddenly Bella's hand was hot in mine, as hot as when she was human. An extremely familiar angry flush filled her face. Her eyes turned red.
"Bella," I said, panicked. "Bella, are you alright?"
Tanya sneered. "Are you sure she's mentally stable, Edward?"
Abruptly everything within a half mile burst into flames—wild, leaping, devouring flames that rushed from the branches of angry, burning trees to feast themselves on Tanya's clothes.
"Holy shit!" Emmett yelled.
Tanya screamed, trying to beat out the fire.
"Bella!" I cried, more shocked than I'd been in my whole life. Small circles that were completely fire-free surrounded everyone except Tanya, who was still screaming.
Bella turned to me, looking more surprised than I felt. Once our eyes met, all the flames died, with no more evidence than the thick smoke covering everything in sight. Nothing was even charred, except for the sorry remains of Tanya's clothes. She covered herself with her hands, a white blur as she ran back into the house, screaming about revenge.
Bella cast a final look about her, at the heavy smoke, at the smoldering ruins of Tanya's shoes, at everyone's shocked faces.
She then promptly fainted.
--
Yes, that's right. This is a multi-chapter songfic. I had to do it, it would have been ridiculously long. But don't worry, my lovelies, it's all already written, so the rest will be coming out tonight…after I have dinner. So stay tuned!
Review! It's what keeps me alive!