Note from Katyrye:

This is an old story that I found on my live journal account under the name CSI Supervisor. I am posting it again with hopes that I can tweak it or reminisce about old stories. I love writing, but I am also a review whore. If you are on facebook, like my page. Have a good day

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Tittle: equanimity

Author: Me
Chapter: One
Rated: Emm for mature
Summary: It's time to take that big step, but things get in the way. It is surely to be the night from hell
A/N: Umm.. Hi
Disclaimer: Is my name katy Grissom? Well, then there's your answer

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We argue.

It's something we've been doing a lot lately, I can't explain why. I love spending time with him and I know he enjoys me, but it hasn't been the same for a while. Our friendship has grown into something more and to tell the truth, I'm scared. I'm afraid he'll leave me and I know he feels the same.

"Sara, if we're going to fight this way then maybe we should stop seeing each other," he said to me.

I turned away from him and walked into his living room. "Fine," I say. "If that's how you feel, then fine."

I didn't mean it and my main intention was to stop the argument; I wanted him to listen to me. I picked up my bag and walked towards the door, I could feel him watching me.

"Wait," he said softly.

"Why?" I ask. "I'm suffocating you, remember. For God's sakes, I don't even know how serious you are about me. We haven't taken the next step yet. I don't want to wait on you anymore."

"Don't say that!" I screamed to myself. By the time it occurred to me to stop, the words had flown out of my mouth before I could stop them.

Grissom sighed. He ran his fingers through his hair and turned towards his kitchen. Was this my queue to leave?

"Would you like a drink?" he asked, taking a bottle of champagne out of a cabinet.

"What?" I asked, raising my eyebrow. He wanted a drink. Now.

"A drink... you know liquid," he said, smiling.

"Sure," I said, slowly.

As he poured me a glass I could feel his eyes on me. I wondered what his motive was for stalling. Surely we were getting nowhere.

"Cheers," he said, clinking glasses with me.

I watched as Grissom downed his glass. I was wondering if he was trying to put 'the moves' on me, or if he had finally snapped.

"Cheers," I replied, sipping mine slowly.

Grissom poured himself more and made his "thinking face". "Sara, I've been saving this," he said to me.

"I'm...sorry. I'll stop drinking it then," I said because I was now convinced he had snapped.

"I was saving this for when we moved to the next step, for when I told you I loved you," he said softly.

"So... you love me." I said, looking away. I changed my mind; he was putting "the moves" on me.

"I do," he said. "I love you very much."

I swallowed. Suddenly I felt guilty because I had just scolded him on how long I've waited and the whole time he had been waiting for the right moment.

"You know I love you too," I said, sipping my champagne.

Grissom nodded. "I do, that's why I was being so careful. I don't want to mess this up," he said, looking into my eyes.

"What's next then?" I asked, the grip that I had on my glass beginning to fail me.

Grissom didn't answer; instead he leaned over and kissed me. I have felt his kisses many times, our first was actually an accident, but we laughed about it. This kiss was different; it had more passion behind it and a little more tongue too. I deepened the kiss, setting my glass down and slipping my fingers into his hair; his hair was always soft and silky, I loved how it felt when I ran my fingers through it.

"I don't like it when we fight," he whispered to me.

"Me either, I'm sorry," I said

"I want us to be perfect," he said, taking my hands and standing..

I stood with him and he slid his hands down my arms. I love the feel of his hands on my skin, they were rough. He ran his fingers up my arms and over my shoulders; I laughed and shied away when he tickled me.

"Does that tickle?" he asked, laughing a little.

"Yes," I whispered, smiling at him.

He repeated his action and I tried to wiggle away; tickles do that to people. He slipped his hands around my waist and held me there as he lowered his head and kissed my tickle spot, right where my neck met my shoulder. It felt heavenly; his lips were soft and warm. He sucked gently enough not to cause bruising.

"Gil, that feels good," I said, placing my hand on his neck and the other on his waist.

"Mmm," he hummed into my neck. "You taste good."

Now that was a shock, I mean, I never heard Grissom talk like that before. It bordered between creepy and arousing.

"Do I now?" I asked.

"Yes," he whispered against my skin.

Somewhere I found the courage to stop him. He looked at me shocked, like I had just told him that Captain Crunch was the next president.

"What's wrong?" He asked.

I smiled at him, sometimes he could have a boyish innocence about him and it was a part of him that I loved very deeply.

"Nothing. I just wanted to taste you, too." I said, bravely.

Grissom raised his eyebrows at me and I brought my head to his throat, just under his chin. I flicked my tongue out and licked in the hollow spot, I felt him swallow. His pulse was racing.

"Sara," he whispered, bringing his hands to my back.

I nibbled on his pulse point a bit and he lowered his head back down to me .This time the kiss was a lot deeper, I slipped my tongue into his mouth and touched his lightly. He sighed into my mouth and pulled me away.

"Sara, are you sure that you want to take this step. I'm sure if-"

Grissom's cell phone tore through the comfortable silence; I grimaced as he pulled back. He looked at me as he reached for his phone.

"Grissom." he said, keeping his eyes on me.

I swallowed nervously and looked at the carpet. Just my luck, I'm just about to score with my boyfriend and someone gets called in.

"Okay, tell them not to touch anything. I'm coming," Grissom replied, clicking his phone shut.

"No you're not" I thought. I looked up and he opened his mouth, I could tell he was searching for something to say.

"Gil, it's OK, I'll wait." I said.

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I paced the floor waiting for Grissom, it had been hours. Soon it would be time for shift to start and any chances of 'scoring' would have to wait. Just then, my phone chirped. I sighed and dug my phone out.

"Sidle," I said, answering.

"Sara, its Grissom. I need you to come in; I need a hand with this." He said.

What? No mention about leaving me high and dry?

"Sure, I'll be there in a minute," I said

"Thank-you," he said.

That was awkward

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I walked down the hall towards Grissom's office; I felt nervousness in the pit of my stomach. You know the feeling that starts between your eyes and then makes its way down to your toes. I passed right by Grissom on my way down the hall; I almost missed him. I stopped and turned to him.

"What do you need me to do?" I asked.

He smiled and backed up until he was inches away from me. "You mean what do I want you to do, or what do I need you to do?" he whispered.

I felt blush creep into my cheeks, he was flirting with me in the hallway of headquarters; very brazen of him.

"What I want was discussed earlier," I said with a grin. "I want to know what you need right now."

"Well, it's kind of along the lines of what I want," he said with a smile.

"Sidle, good you made it," Ecklie said, interrupting our intimate moment.

"Yes, I came as soon as I could," I said, reluctantly breaking eye contact with Grissom and turning to face the-devil-himself.

"I'm sure Gil was just briefing you on our situation?" Ecklie asked.

"Umm... yes I was," Grissom said.

Nice recovery Gil, you were briefing me on something alright, but I'm absolutely positive that it won't have anything to do with Ecklie.

"Has she seen the tape yet?" Ecklie asked.

Grissom shook his head. "No, I was just about to show her."

"Okay, good. Page me when we're ready to start," he said, turning to walk away.

Grissom opened the door to Archie's lab and smile. "Shall we then?" he said.

We shall.

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After we watched the video, which was twenty minutes of a man rambling about Wal-Mart, we decided to visit the creator. He was a man who claimed that if Wal-Mart didn't lower their prices, he was going to walk in with a bomb and blow it up. I felt a little bad, I liked Wal-Mart.

"You're telling me that a store can charge you five bucks for a pack of batteries and you're okay with it?" The man shouted at Grissom.

"Sir, I'm sorry. But, you know if you get rechargeable batteries then you can charge them and not have to buy new ones." I offered, trying to help.

"That's not the point lady," he said to me.

I held up my hands in surrender. It may be best to let the 'Big Dog' handle this. For some reason, my referring to Grissom as a 'Big Dog' was a total turn on.

"Why don't you shop somewhere else?" Grissom asked the man.

"I like Wal-Mart and the other stores aren't exactly my taste," he said.

That did it. When I thought of taste, I thought of Grissom. When I thought of Grissom, I thought of taste. And when you put Grissom and taste together, you get Grissom tasting. Now what, may I ask, was he just tasting? Me. And when I think of Grissom tasting me, I laugh. And that is exactly what I did.

I laughed. I snorted. And I snickered.

Grissom and the 'Wal-Mart man' looked at me as if I had lost my mind.

"Sara, do you need to go and compose yourself?" Grissom asked me. His tone was serious, but his eyes were smiling at me.

I nodded and excused myself. Oh boy.

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"So, a Wal-Mart being blown up is funny to you?" Grissom asked me. We were in the Denali, heading back to the lab. Now this is just my personal opinion, but why does he always get the Denali.

"No," I said. "It was just something I had heard earlier that I had thought of."

Oh sure, like he'd believe that. At that exact moment, he was eying me from head to toe.

"Well, I can use a laugh. What was it?" He asked.

"You know… jezz I already forgot," I said, giving him my sweetest smile.

But my laughter was returning. I was caught.

"Liar…liar," he teased.

Now this made me laugh more, Grissom was flirting. I burst out in a fit of laughter.

"It's you," I said laughing.

"Me?," he asked innocently. "I don't think I did anything to you."

Yet. Not yet you haven't.

"It's how you act. When the crazy 'Wal-Mart man' said the other stores weren't his taste, I thought of you."

Grissom nodded. "So, Wal-Mart makes you think of me."

"No," I whispered, we were back to playful banter.

"Blowing things up?" He asked, trying to look serious.

"No." I said.

"Taste?" He asked, looking me dead in the eye.

I turned a shade of red that could only be described as 'Apple' and smiled. Grissom reached over and took my hand; he brought it to his mouth and kissed it. His lips were just as soft as they had been on my neck, his saliva was warm. Now I know saliva makes me sick, but his was defiantly a turn on for me.

"I'm sorry I left you. When I called Ecklie was standing right behind me, or I would have made my case over the phone," He said, kissing each one of my fingers.

We pulled into the parking lot and just sat there. The temptation to run my fingers through his silky hair was beginning to weigh me down.

"Gil, we have a few hours before shift, let's just-"

Beep Beep!

Grissom let go of my hand and we turned to look at the person who had interrupted us. Grissom had the pissed off look of a wild animal, who desperately wanted to mate with his female.

"Hey Griss!" Nick shouted, jogging over to our car.

"I'm going to kill someone," Grissom said, rolling down the window.

That would be the day.

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Chapter two is ready. Give this some love.