Disclaimer: Characters belong to Kishimoto.
Untitled
For the first time in months Amegakure sees the sun. Everyone takes the time to enjoy this rare moment of warmth, a sanctuary from the constant rain that this city is famous for, and it's hard not to come across someone that isn't smiling today.
Then again, I've never been one to follow the crowd.
I sit alone on a park bench and watch as children run around, laughing wildly as they chase their friends while parents watch on with amused gazes. I see elderly people walking around with each other, holding hands as if they're back in their teen years and going on first dates. Other people are like me, observing others as they go about their day. The only difference between me and them is they're smiling and I am not.
Even though the heat of the sun shines down upon me, all I feel is a coldness growing inside me with each passing second. I'm wearing a thick woolly sweater, gloves, and a scarf—people toss me odd looks but none of them approach, too carefree in their own happiness—but even the extra clothes fail to warm me up.
I don't care. I've become used to this chill by now and only bother to dress like this because Granny will nag me otherwise. She's of the firm belief that desert-dwellers like us weren't built for the cold city life, especially one as wet as Ame. And it's not like she's willing to move back to Suna; our family is infamous for our stubbornness.
Not like there's anything back there for us, I think and turn my gaze skyward. Not much holding me here, either.
I haven't seen a truly blue sky since I lived in Suna. It's a sight that always impressed me as a child, and even now it still makes me pause.
Have you ever just taken a moment to stop and look at the world around you? Have you ever realized how small you are in comparison to the rest of the world? Have you ever realized how lucky you are to have been born in such beauty?
As I stare up at the endless expanse of blue, I find myself thinking that I'd rather have not been born at all. Really, what's the point?
People are born, they live, and then they die. It's as simple as that—yet people struggle to find a meaning to it all. Why are we born? Why do we live? Why do we die? They ask themselves this when there isn't an obvious answer.
I can't speak for them, but I know why I was born. My parents wanted a child to love and nurture as their own. They wanted to share their love with someone and then they had me. It was unfortunate that they never got to see me grow up—it was unfortunate that the man behind the wheel had been drinking that day because his wife was leaving him because she couldn't stand the thought of them losing another baby before it could really live.
Love is stupid. People make stupid choices in the name of it, and they never seem to realize the suffering they bring upon others until it's too late.
So my parents died while I lived. The drunk driver died while his wife lived for a time until she committed suicide, not wanting to give birth to her newborn in a world that took away the life of her dearly beloved.
Love is stupid. It drags us down and destroys any sort of capacity we have to be reasonable, intelligent creatures. If people didn't love, they wouldn't suffer when their loved ones died. See? It's that simple. You just have to learn how to stop caring . . .
It's simple.
My gaze returns to the ground as I hear a child shout angrily, "Now look what you did, dobe! You hit the ball too far!"
A child with short and spikey blond hair scowls at the other, his face stained with an embarrassed flush of red. "It's not my fault I'm super strong, Sasuke-teme!"
The child named Sasuke continues glaring at his friend. "Just go get the ball, baka!"
Blondie huffs and matches Sasuke's glare for a moment, but then he reluctantly goes to retrieve the ball which is lying on the side of the road. "Stupid Sasuke," he mutters as he walks past me. "Why does he always act like such a jerk?"
"Geez, danna, why are you such a jerk, hm?"
I tense as that voice echoes through my mind. It's not real, I think, shutting my eyes in an attempt to block everything out. Just ignore it.
"Hey, quit ignoring me! That's rude, Sasori no danna!"
Shut up, I hiss quietly and for a moment it works.
"There, ya happy, Sasuke-teme?" Blondie shouts and I open my eyes in time to see him throw the ball back to his friend. He grins widely when the ball hits Sasuke in the head and he doubles over with laughter at the dumbfounded look on the dark-haired boy's face.
That look changes and I immediately recognize it as horror. When I follow his gaze, I feel my own eyes widen.
"It only takes one moment to change your life. So what are you going to do when that moment comes, danna? Are you just gonna sit there and watch or are you gonna do something about it, hm?"
"Naruto!" Sasuke screams.
The boy—Naruto—only has one second to react but all he does is stand there, watching as the car continues barreling right for him.
It's simple. Just stop caring . . .
"I'm sorry, hm. I never meant for you to get hurt like this, Sasori. I know how much you pretend not to care . . . But you were never a very good liar."
CRASH!
"Oh, my god!"
"Somebody call an ambulance!"
"NARUTO!"
It's been so long since I've seen such a truly beautiful blue, I think as I stare up at the sky, numb to everything around me but that cloudless sky. Distantly, I can feel the boy get pulled out of my arms and into those of a redheaded woman I assume is his mother. I can hear people crowd around me in a panic as they try to see whether or not I'm all right, if I'm even alive.
What a waste of time. I haven't been alive ever since he died.
"Life is fleeting. That's why we try so hard to cling on to it, hm. Sasori, you need to learn to let go. It'll make it easier in the end when I . . ."
It's simple, Deidara. Love is stupid. It makes people do stupid things . . . Like fall in love with an idiot like you. Even when you're gone . . . I can't let you go, no matter how much I try.
I stare up at the sun and feel my lips curl into a smile as I finally feel its warmth. Today is such a nice day, right, brat? Let's enjoy it together.
"You really are an idiot, Sasori. But I guess that's why I love you, hm."
I love you, too, Deidara. See you soon.
