Disclaimer: all creative rights to the One Tree Hill characters belong to their original creator(s)!
"Nathan?"
She pokes his chest. Nothing.
"Nathan."
She pulls his nose, but he still doesn't respond.
"Nathan!"
This time, she smacks him hard on the arm, so hard that it has to hurt. She has a mean punch when she puts effort into it.
He mumbles groggily, jerking a little on the bed.
Even before he's fully conscious, she barks, "What the hell is this?"
His eyes open slowly, seeing a dark shape looming over him.
"Huh?"
Rubbing a hand over his face, he tries to adjust to the darkness. Her silhouette is so close that if he were to raise his head, their foreheads would touch.
He leans over the bed to turn on the bedside lamp. In the soft light, Haley is looking at him intently and seriously, holding a banana in one hand.
She's in her ivory nightslip, her pregnant belly accentuated over the smooth material, her legs over each side of his thighs.
"Hales, what the hell?"
She shakes her head.
"No, Nathan. What. The. Hell. Is this?" she emphasizes, gesturing to the banana with her chin.
He's a little confused. "Um, a banana?"
She smiles tightly with no humour, saying, "Yes, honey, I know it's a banana. What have we talked about before in regards to bananas?"
He's still confused, his concentration quite lacking what with being somewhere between consciousness and sleep.
"They're good?"
He sees his wife clench her mouth into a thin line, a choppy huff passing her nose. She is very serious about this banana that he's becoming alert.
"Try again."
"I don't know what you want me to say. It's two-thirty in the morning," he says, looking sideways to the red blinking numbers of the alarm clock.
She waves a hand away. "I don't care. You've wronged me and you deserve to be woken up."
He doesn't really understand what is going on, but he knows it has something to do with the banana she's holding.
"Hales, what did I do?"
Her face inches closer to his, her hand closing tightly over the banana.
"What do you mean what did you do?" she asks through clenched teeth.
He shrinks back into his pillow, unsure of what to say or do.
"Nathan, you know how I'm pregnant with your son?"
Being sarcastic wouldn't sit well with her right now. He simply nods.
"You know how I've told you a million times over the last few months that I don't want to see bananas in this apartment?"
That sarcasm is bubbling within him but he swallows it down. He needs to be careful and not provoke the tiger.
Haley nods satisfactorily. "Good. And what do I have in my hand?"
"A banana," he says slowly.
"A banana. A banana, Nathan! And it's the only fruit in this house! Where are my apples? Huh? Did you eat them all like the last time? You remember that?"
He winces as he recalls the incident where he had eaten the last apple, and left a banana for her, thinking it was the right and considerate thing to do.
Haley had been pissed. Skinned-him-alive livid.
She'd gone on a prolonged tirade about his selfishness, thoughtlessness and immaturity. How apples and maturity had come into play together, he didn't know.
"Baby, it wasn't me. It was probably Tim or Luke," he protests.
She brings her face even closer to his, the tip of her nose lightly brushing his.
"And you let them?"
He can feel her breathing against his lips, and he wants to kiss her.
"I—"
She shakes her head quickly, not wanting to hear it.
"Your son wants an apple. He demands an apple, and there are no apples in this house. Or anything related to apples. No apple juice or apple pie or apple anything! Do you see where I'm going with this?" she asks.
What else can he do but nod?
"Just imagine being in my situation, having a sudden craving in the middle of the night for apple goodness that will help your son grow into a healthy little boy. And then to my surprise, I find five bananas instead. I mean, yesterday morning, I had left three apples in the fruit bowl but suddenly, there were none."
She laughs dryly, shaking her head in amusement. "So I thought that I was going insane by forgetting that I had eaten three delicious apples all by myself."
Her smile falls and she looks at him with a deadpan expression. "But then I remembered that I wasn't home most of the day yesterday. Are you still following me?"
Before he can respond, she blurts, "Five bananas, Nathan. What the hell am I supposed to do with those? Make a swap with the night runner for my apples?"
She's almost yelling, and it's bound to wake up the neighbours. God knows they've been in enough trouble with them over their frequent get-togethers, loud friends and most recently, Haley's temper tantrums.
Nathan is just looking up at her, giving her time to finish the ranting and rambling. Over the months she's been pregnant, he has realized that it's always best to let her conclude rather than interrupt her.
Strays of her hair are tickling his face and it's taking a lot on his part not to tuck them behind her ears.
"—and now look at this! Am I not to be taken seriously, Nathan? Is it that unimportant to you to have a healthy son? Do you want a malnourished baby? Because trust me, if you're not giving your baby what he wants, he will look like a malnourished bag of bones. Is that the impression you want to give to the world? That you don't give a damn about your baby's health and wellbeing? That you were too busy feeding yourself to take care of your wife and child?"
Of their own accord, his lips twitch slightly.
"Are you mocking me, Nathan?" she narrows her eyes at him.
"No."
"You better not be."
"I'm not. Baby, you want me to go buy you some apples?"
Haley gives him a look of disgust and pushes herself off of him.
"It's too late for your damn sorry apples," she harrumphs, dropping her feet to the floor.
Before she steps out of the room, she turns around, throwing the banana at him. He ducks, the banana landing perfectly on her pillow. She either has rotten aim or she loves him too much to nick his face with a banana.
He can hear her shouting as she walks towards the kitchen.
"I can't believe you! You know how much bananas have disgusted me these last few months! I've told you a million times to keep those slimy things out of my house!"
Sleepily, Nathan pulls himself out of the bed and pads down the hallway.
"Do you know how much it irritates me to see you eating that smarmy thing in my presence? Of course you do. Because I've told you! And you don't even do me the decent courtesy of telling your friends to keep their hands off my apples!"
"Luke is also your friend."
She whips her head sharply back at him, glaring coldly at him.
"What?"
He's just frozen on the spot, darting his eyes around the room.
"Uh, I just said that…that Luke is also your friend," he stutters nervously.
"When he is eating my damn fruits, Nathan, he is not my friend! Tell me what it is you want me to do. Put labels on my fruits? Will that work?"
She's yelling again.
"Hales, you'll wake the neighbours."
She walks towards him slowly and even with the difference in their height and build, she looks quite scary.
"You…I don't care if I wake the freaking mayor or the president! Come think of it, your father is the mayor. Maybe he'll do me a favour by smuggling me a whole truckload of apples! That way, I won't have to strangle his son for being so selfish and careless with his child's growth! You know what? You can have an apple party for all I care! "
Bursting into tears, she shuffles to the couch, plopping down on it.
"You want to eat my apples? Fine! I don't care anymore! Eat all my apples and watch me wither away to an anemic status! See how much you'll care about our health when I'm lacking s-so much blood in my body that I can't even open my eyes to look at your selfish face!"
Raising her head, she wipes at her tears, her face pink and flushed.
"God, this is all your fault! I should just stick bubblegum in your hair and make you feel as frustrated as I am!"
He watches her for some time, feeling like quite the selfish fool. He always hates seeing her cry, especially when he's to blame.
When she seems to be cooling off, he walks tentatively towards her.
She's watching him closely, sniffling, looking quite the sight with a strap of her nightslip hanging off one shoulder, her eyes narrowed at him like she wants to pounce for battle.
He sits on the coffee table, drawing the strap to right it on her shoulder before lifting her feet to his lap. She doesn't punch his stomach with her foot. That has to be a good sign.
As he massages her feet, she begins to relax, sighing, closing her eyes to lean back on the couch.
"Hales?"
"Mmm…" she moans.
"Do you want an apple? I can drive to the store," Nathan says while rubbing her feet gently.
He's on a first-name basis with the late-night store clerk.
"Would you?" she whispers.
"Anything for my babies," he smiles, leaning over to kiss her.
She laughs, blinking at her wet lashes. "No one has the ability to drive me from zero to sixty and back to zero again like you do, Scott."
"You happen to have the same effect on me, James. How about a ride to the store with me? I can introduce you to Barry."
"Barry?"
"Barry. He's dying to meet the woman who has me pushing a full cart on most school-nights."
Like? Dislike? Thanks for reading!