Chapter 1
The nether realm which housed the banished demon sorcerers was vast and endless. Hsi Wu had disappeared for years at a time, into the orange sky, trying to find an end to the void, but always somehow ended up back in the large area the sorcerers loosely called home. Tso Lan told Drago it was because the dimension wasn't fully formed, or because it was damaged in some way, it was simply not a true plane of existence. He would have gone on at length but despite Drago's ever growing boredom, he lacked interest in his uncle's theories.
Sitting on one of the endless rocky platforms of the demons' prison, Drago was nearly tempted to go talk to Tso Lan, but his pride overcame his boredom. Tso Lan had been particularly rough in the battle to reclaim the demon chi from Drago nearly a year ago. Of course it hadn't been long before the demons had tired of tormenting Drago and his father Shendu, only perhaps six months had passed before even the most sadistic sibling, Xiao Fung, had lost interest.
Since then Drago had mostly kept to himself, meditating to rebuild his own natural chi stores and to recover from the beating he'd taken. His aunts and uncles would sometimes drift by him, and Drago would feign polite deference to them, and they would quickly move on in search of something else to entertain themselves. Of all the punishments that could have been devised for the demon sorcerers, boredom was by far the cruelest Drago could now imagine.
"Eleven thousand and thirty-three bottles of beer on the wall, eleven thousand thirty-three, take one down pass it around Eleven thousand and thirty-two bottles of beer on the wall," Drago sang loudly to himself. His current attempt to thwart the insidious boredom of the orange hell was to throw pebbles at passing rocks while singing inane songs. He'd started at fifteen thousand bottles.
"Eleven thousand and thirty-two bottles of beer on the wall, eleven thousand thirty-two, take one down pass it around Eleven thousand and thirty-one bottles of beer on the wall," Drago sang, his voice echoed through the void, a welcome respite from the usual startling silence. The pebbles he threw clicked against the rocks, skipping and tumbling down into the void, disturbing the silence in harmony with Drago.
"Eleven thousand and thirty-one bottles of beer on the wall, eleven thousand thirty-one, take one down pass it around Eleven thousand and thirty bottles of beer on the wall," Drago's claws scraped against the rocky ground searching for further pebbles, after a few moments of futile fumbling a glance showed Drago there were no more pebbles on his rock, and a thorough inspection only confirmed it.
"Not even a hundred on this rock, figures," Drago sighed to himself, his song paused for lack of ammunition. The silence quickly moved in without the young dragon's voice keeping it at bay. Drago looked out into the endless void, wondering which rock he'd travel to next, not that it mattered in the slightest. Maybe this time he'd look for one a bit further away, stretch his legs a bit.
Drago stood in a single fluid movement, stretching out muscles that hadn't fatigued once since he'd arrived in this timeless limbo. The demon inhabitants weren't even allowed to escape the realm in sleep, as they never grew tired, hungry or thirsty. Except Po Kong, but she seemed more obsessed with the idea of eating, then the actual need for food. Drago shook his head, just because he was imprisoned with his aunts and uncles, didn't mean he was going to waste anymore thoughts on them then he had when he'd been free. He crouched, curling powerful muscles under himself, his tail twitched, and Drago leapt from the rock hurtling through the air, or whatever counted for air here, either way it rushed past his ears, creating an illusion of wind. His clawed feet left deep cuts in the next rock he landed upon and sprung away from quickly. Drago felt like he could go on forever at this pace, and had gone on for days once, before boredom had sunk in again.
The orange sky was unaffected by his passing, as Drago hopped, jumped and leapt from rock to rock. It was nearly meditative in its own right, and quickly lulled Drago into a thoughtful quiet, as he wandered.
"Jackie!"
A quiet that was surprisingly and suddenly broken.
Drago couldn't have stopped any faster if he'd jumped into a brick wall. He knew that voice like it had been etched into the insides of his ears.
"Come on Uncle Jackie!"
The young girl's voice broke the silence again, and for Drago it may has well have been a gunshot, because he was off racing to the source of the voice. Racing to Jade Chan's voice.
His earlier grace had deserted him in his mad scramble. He landed on all fours and sprung forward like the rock had burned him.
"Jade…" this time a man's voice broke the silence, and Drago whipped around, correcting his course. It was another he knew well.
Rapidly he scurried through the rocky sky, driven by a thousand emotions, though mostly rage, definitely rage. It spurred him on to such speed, a small part of him fancied himself on par with his father's speed talisman. Of course his wild running lacked the control of the talisman.
Drago landed bodily on his Uncle Hsi Wu, only just avoiding plunging his claw's into his Uncle's wings and instead into the rock. Hsi Wu, squished by the young dragon, was quick to throw Drago away, swiping the boy away with a large clawed hand to the chest, and rolled onto his side, wheezing to recover his breathe. Drago smashed backwards into a rocky protrusion, crumpling around it, and then bounced to the ground.
"When is everyone getting here Jackie?"
"Soon Jade! I have to finish this before your party, go help Tohru in the kitchen."
Drago sprung forward to his knees, aggravating his newly acquired bruises, desperate to locate the Chans who thwarted him so thoroughly. The rage in him was snuffed out in an instance when Drago realized the source of the voices.
Upon the air hung a vision of the Chans, flat and oval, it was a mirror framed in grey smoke and it reflected the realm the sorcerers had been banished from. Jade hopped down from the chair next to Jackie, and fluttered across the room, the image followed her into the kitchen where she greeted the mountain of a man, Tohru, with enthusiasm.
"It seems nephew, you have failed to look before you leap," Hsi Wu said, drawing himself to his feet, and though he was the smallest of the demon brethren he still loomed over Drago.
Drago ignored the tacit threat from his Uncle and asked, "What is this? Is this real?"
Hsi Wu huffed impatiently, "Of course it's real boy, I am scrying on the air. I am ruler of the sky on Earth, here or anywhere."
Drago watched the vision hungrily as he spoke to his uncle. It seemed to follow Jade throughout her uncle's shop. She was full of energy, nearly running from room to room, she seemed happy. It darkened Drago's mood, but he couldn't look away.
"Why are you watching the Chans?" Drago asked after a moment.
"What else is there to do?" Hsi Wu answered, "The Chans managed to defeat us all at every turn, and when we find another way to escape this realm, they shall try again," Hsi Wu gracefully retook his perch on a sitting stone, roughly cuffing Drago across the back of his head with his tail in his short glide. "If nothing else, they're entertaining," Hsi Wu added absent mindedly, resuming his vigil.
"How? Teach me to how to scry like this!" Drago demanded.
Hsi Wu spared Drago a lazy role of his eyes, "Perhaps when you had a piece of my Chi it may have been possible, but as you are now, it would be impossible to teach you sky magic of this level."
Drago glared at his Uncle, before turning back to the vision. Jade seemed to have resumed annoying her uncle. Once Drago may have dismissed this type of voyeurism as beneath him, or as the petty action of a weakling. That Drago had not sung a few thousand verses of bottles of beer on the wall.
With one practiced movement, Drago folded himself into a half-lotus position, his tail curling into his lap, his eyes never leaving Jade Chan's actions.
Hsi Wu's eyes narrowed at Drago, "I don't recall inviting you to stay little dragon," he growled.
"Too bad," Drago said in way of answer. When Hsi Wu ignored Drago with a snort, they both resumed watching the scene unfold in quiet rapture. For even though it was a very human and ordinary occurrence, the ensuing birthday party was thousands of times more interesting than exploring an endless wasteland of twilight.
Uncle's Rare Finds
"Uncle Jackie!" Jade called, for what to said uncle, seemed the millionth time this day.
"Enough Jade! I have to finish these translations before the party," Jackie Chan said, lowering his book, atop the rather momentous pile of antique texts and ancient scrolls. He once again pushed the rolled sleeves of his blue shirt back, having given up on avoiding wrinkling it today. Despite the party decorations which had been spread throughout Uncle's Rare Finds and streamers in bright orange and red, and balloon clusters in improbable shapes, the shop seemed more filled with ancient artifacts and historical documents than ever before.
Careful not to jostle the overburdened table before him, Jackie scanned the shop. Rather than being filled with customers, retail had taken a back seat to Uncle's quest to head off the next evil force, destined to take Drago's place. Jackie had spent the better part of last year split between gathering artifacts for his uncle and the museum, while still helping his friend Captain Black out with the odd mission here and there. Most of the artifacts seemed to amount to Uncle tying up loose ends, or at least Jackie deduced as much. Jackie himself had been researching all he could about the Panku Box, which balanced precariously on the edge of the table, being certain to check it posed no further threat. Spread throughout the store were Uncle's "new apprentices" engaged in much the same. Hak Fu was in a corner of the store, a small pile of books next to him with one Band of Shiva resting atop, and one in Hak Fu's hand as he studied it, comparing it to illustrations in an ancient text while he was doing one handed push-ups above. Chow had carefully cleared a space for the Déjà Vu stone, and was glancing up at it warily from his text, from time to time. At the same table Ratso was carefully piecing together the shattered remains of the Cat of Khartoum, while referencing a rare scroll, and taking surprisingly careful notes. Despite not having the cursed gem at hand, Fin was nearly buried in a multitude of books, ranging from ancient to modern print about the Infamous Emerald of Killarney. Everyone looked like they needed the break that the afternoon's party promised.
"Aiya! What do you mean you're not finished translations yet!" Uncle yelled, walking into the room, startling Ratso into nearly tipping over the delicately reassembled statue. "You want next evil to catch us by surprise? No? Then we do research now!" Uncle berated his nephew, waving the Monkey King puppet threateningly about, to punctuate himself. Uncle was dressed much as usual, but had traded his sweater vest for a more modern looking green vest, that pretended at a silken texture, but was likely some type of polyester blend. Retrieving the Monkey King had been a particularly stressful field trip for the Chan clan, as he'd somehow ended up as the star attraction at a puppet theatre production of Gone with the Wind.
"Uncle please be careful with that. If you accidently pull the puppet's leg, you'll set him free!" Jackie warned. He rose to his feet, hands raised warily against the puppet. Uncle snatched the Monkey King puppet back to himself with a mild glare for his nephew.
"And with no Rat Talisman around, you'd be stuck as a puppet yourself," Jade commented slyly, grin full of mischief. Jade had mourned the loss of the talismans for quite a long time, after Shendu and Drago's banishment, but she'd found that adventures without the talismans proved just as entertaining to her adventurous spirit.
Uncle glared at Jade and Jackie, "You think Uncle doesn't know how to avoid turning into wooden puppet man? Uncle's been researching puppet monkey for three days! What Uncle knows about puppet monkey would make the birthday girl cry," Uncle said with a smirk. Though the elderly chi wizard had been pushing everyone for months, even he was looking forward to celebrating Jade's 14th birthday. He'd volunteered the shop this year for a large party, despite the availability of Section 13. Guests had been invited from Jade's school, Jackie's day job at the museum, and other friends of the small family, necessitating a less secret location.
"As if!" Jade replied, making a silly face at her great uncle. Jackie rolled his eyes, and gently turned Jade around by her shoulders, giving her a small push towards the stairs.
"Jade don't you need to go change before our guests get here? They should be in a taxi by now," Jackie said, shooing Jade upstairs. Jade went, nearly bumping into Uncle who had turned his attention to checking the shop till, to be sure it was entirely emptied and the money secured before guests began to arrive.
Rolling her eyes at her uncle, Jade went up the stairs, yet she was nearly bursting with excitement before she even reached the spare room, where she'd stashed her bag. She'd bought a new orange tank top and black slacks for the party, which she changed into quickly enough. She sneezed once, because the store room was full of dust and old artifacts which Uncle hadn't or couldn't sell. There was a tall mirror next to the door of the room, it had a large crack and was freckled with dirt but it was serviceable.
Jade peered closely in the mirror, around the dirt spots. "I wonder," she said and held a flat hand against the side of her head. She spun around and knelt, sticking her entire arm in her bag, looking for something. "Ahah!" she declared with triumph, pulling her trusty measuring tape out of her bag. With a snap she had tucked one end under the toe of her shoe and was pulling the tape up her side. She pinched the tape just above the top of her head, and then looked at the number.
"Yes! I knew it! Four feet, 10 inches! Jackie!" Jade cried, running out the storage room and down the stairs.
"Jackie, Jackie, Jackie!" Jade cried out running through the research group. This time Ratso did manage to knock over the Cat of Khartoum, but Chow managed to rescue it with a dive catch. Finn was startled enough to collapse his book pile and bury himself under it. Hak Fu was nonplussed.
"Yes Jade?" Jackie said with a resigned sigh, not even lowering his book this time.
"I grew two whole inches this month! I'm four foot, 10 inches!" Jade exclaimed with excitement.
"That's very nice Jade, now go help Tohru with the food," Jackie said, used to Jade's exhilaration over her growth spurt over the past year. It had been long in coming, but Jade had been growing like a weed.
"I don't know Jackie, another two inches? At this rate she's going be six feet tall before you know it," Captain Black said, coming through the front door with a chime. He'd forgone his usual trench coat for a grey sports jacket and slacks.
"Captain Black!" Jackie and Jade both happily cried. Already over excited, Jade met the captain with a friendly hug, and smiled largely at him when they parted.
"Those are some nice duds there little lady," Black complimented Jade, making his way with her to Jackie in the crowded store.
"Thanks Captain Black! Where's my birthday present? I want to pile them all up in the center of the room!" Jade asked enthusiastically.
"Jade, it's not polite to demand presents from a guest as soon as they walk in the door. Please go help Tohru finish in the kitchen, before anyone else arrives," Jackie scolded Jade.
"Awww," Jade moaned, slouching with exaggerated disappointment, she turned to go into the kitchen. She pouted over her shoulder, "But I'm the birthday girl!" Jackie only gave her a steady and patient look, waiting for her to do as she was told.
Captain Black came to stand by Jackie as Jade left the room, and careful not to jostle any of the books on Jackie's desk, Black took a thick manila envelope from his pocket and placed it in front of Jackie. Quietly Black said to Jackie, "Everything's in here that we discussed."
"I'm still not sure if this is a good idea," Jackie said picking up the envelope. It wasn't sealed, so he slid out the largest brochure, a school brochure. I was thick and heavy paper, with a gloss that spoke to its quality and expense.
"Jade will love it there Jackie. It's where the best agents in the world train and some of them even teach there now," Black assured Jackie, as he leafed through the brochure. It showed pictures of state of the art classrooms and facilities. Little quotes from students and staff littered the brochure, like testimonials for a College rather than a high school.
"Jade gets in enough trouble as it is at home. Sending her across the country to go to spy school will only mean I can't help her when she gets into more trouble," Jackie said, unable to really believe the shiny plasticity the brochure presented to him. Jackie suspected that the school would not be nearly so tame as the brochure promised, a suspicion born from instinct that had been learned from involuntary association with secret agents and super spies.
"Now Jackie, it's not a spy school. It's a boarding school for those with special… interest in high technology and government work," Captain Black said with a smile, despite Jackie's withering glare.
Uncle's Rare Finds: Kitchen
"Hey Tohru!" Jade said bounding into the kitchen, "How's the food coming?"
"The food will be ready soon, all your favourites Jade," Tohru said with a smile. He leaned back from the stove to show Jade the onion stir fry he was cooking up, and better yet the freshly iced chocolate cake sitting on the counter. There was a scatter of other plates, piled high with finger foods, like sandwiches, chips and dip, homemade spring rolls and little hot dogs rolled in soft bread.
"Oooh, tasty," Jade said. She leaned around Tohru, and deeply inhaled the mixed scents of all the food Tohru had been slaving over. It made her mouth water.
"Would you please cut the pepper for me Jade? There's some on the cutting board there," Tohru asked, pointing.
"Sure thing T," Jade said happily. Though Tohru took up much of the kitchen, Jade's small form had plenty of space to manoeuver around the kitchen, and now she didn't even need a stepping stool. She wet some paper towel and put it under the cutting board so it wouldn't move, just like Tohru had shown her, and carefully set to cutting the pepper in half, and then long lengths. She lacked the speed at the cutting board her uncle and Tohru had, but Jade had seen enough Kung Fu films to know, practice was the key. And her uncle may have reminded her once or twice.
Taking another look around the kitchen, Jade wondered aloud, "Is this gonna be enough food for everyone?"
"I have ordered several extra-large pizzas, from Luigi's. They should be arriving shortly," Tohru replied.
"Ooh Luigi's? That's the best pizza in Chinatown!" Jade said happily. She carefully set to dicing the pepper, careful to try and keep the knife on the cutting board. After separating the diced pepper from the stem and seeds, Jade lifted the cutting board and took it to Tohru at the stove. She offered it to him with a smile.
"Very good Jade, you've gotten much better," Tohru said, complementing the young girl.
"Hehe," she laughed embarrassed by the simple praise, "Must be because I have such a great teacher."
Tohru smiled at Jade, and took the cutting board. He added the diced pepper to the wok, stirring it in carefully. Without taking his focus off the stove in front of him, he began to speak to Jade, "You are much more than the product of your teachers Jade. I am proud of the young woman you are growing up to be, and I know my life would be much less bright, if you were not in it." Tohru delivered this heartfelt praise, with a faint blush, and though it seemed a touch rehearsed, it still rang sincere.
"Tohru…" Jade said, eyes misting with the threat of a few tears. She hugged her large friend, who put aside the cooking to return the hug with equal feeling. For a moment they stood together quietly, the stir-fry sizzling away on the stove top, quiet chatter wafting in from the rest of the home. The bell of the front door opening ended the moment, and they parted. With an embarrassed chuckle, Tohru turned back to the cooking.
"I'll go check who that is," Jade said to Tohru, leaving the kitchen. Expecting another invited guest, Jade smoothed her hair back down around her ears, and smiled brightly. Yet her smile faltered, giving way to confusion as she entered the shop and saw someone decidedly uninvited, Wesley Rank, former star of Behind the Artifacts. He was dressed in a brown suit that had seen better days, but was still impeccably kept. His hair was just as long as it was before, but had been tightly braided to the back of his head, creating an illusion of shortness.
"So this is where you've been holed up all this time Mr. Chan!" Rank called out to Jackie, Australian accent as thick as before, as he entered the shop. Rank looked around the store, a smug grin on his face. "Is this your shop Mr. Chan? It's…" Rank, paused, scrunching his lips as he thought of the right word. "Quaint," he settled on.
Jackie stood up quickly, and strode over to Rank. He perhaps should have been more surprised by Rank's arrival, but Jackie had heard from his colleagues at the museum that the disgraced pseudo-archeologist had been sniffing around San Francisco. "Thank you, but we're closed. You'll have to leave now, bye-bye!" Jackie said quickly, with false cheer.
"Now, now, Mr. Chan!" Rank said, as he dodged Jackie and walked deeper into the store. "It's been an age since we last met."
Jackie's cheerful smile, immediately melted into a serious frown, "Since you stole the snake talisman from me, you mean."
"Yes dreadfully sorry about that, but of course we can't live in the past can we?" Rank said with a dismissive wave of his hand. He walked over to Jackie's desk and bent to get a closer look at the Panku Box.
"What are you doing here Rank?" Jade asked, after she snatched the Panku Box away from Rank, holding it half hidden at her side.
"I have a proposition for your father girly, archeologist to archeologist," Rank said, stretching to his full height to look down his nose at Jade.
"My uncle already told you, store's closed. Leave," Jade said with a glare. Hak Fu rose from his push-ups and laid his Band of Shiva next to its twin. He moved to stand behind Jade arms folded and frowning at the intruder.
"You've got an awful lot of people here for the store to be closed," Rank said looking around, walking past Jade and ignoring the glowering Black Tiger.
Jackie was quick to catch him by his shoulder, "These are employees," Jackie explained, "They may stay, you must leave."
Rank turned around to look at Jackie, "Mr. Chan, you haven't even heard me explain why I'm here," Rank said, smoothly, his voice dripping with oil.
"Not interested," Jackie said, pulling Rank's arm towards the door.
"Hey hold on!" Rank said startled, trying to squirm out of Jackie's grip. "Listen I've got a big chance here, the studio's offered me a new show!"
"That's very good for you. Good luck with that," Jackie said. He spun Rank around so he faced the door, and pushed his shoulders to force him towards the door.
Rank resisted being thrown out by catching the door frame with his hands, "There's a catch! They want you to be my co-host!" Rank was desperate, and as Jackie only increased his efforts Rank pushed back by placing the soles of his boots against the door frame.
"You want Jackie to be on TV?" Jade asked with confusion, she handed the Panku Box to Hak Fu, and followed Jackie and Rank to the door. Hak Fu glanced at the Panku box, carelessly tossed it on the desk, and followed Jade closely.
"The studio saw the footage from the temple! They love you Mr. Chan!" Rank was nearly yelling by now, his smooth smugness utterly wiped away with his desperation
"I don't want to be on TV," Jackie said firmly, flipping around so he was back to back with Rank and could push against him with even more force. It left him unsteady though, and as the shop door swung inward, Jackie toppled over, with Rank falling on top of him.
"Sorry," a familiar voice said.
Jackie moaned from underneath Rank, rubbing his head where it had smacked the floor. He tried to push himself up, but only succeeded in rolling Rank off of him, who was quick to recover and brush himself off, retreating further into the store. Jackie made another effort to stand up, which was eased by the steady of hands of Viper.
"Easy handsome," Viper said softly, pulling Jackie up. Jackie was able to shake off the sudden headache, enough to give a reproachful glare to the newly arrived and apologetic looking El Toro. El Toro, dressed in his familiar suit, was holding three large boxes, wrapped in brightly coloured paper, they'd obscured his view when he'd opened the door.
"El Toro, Viper, Paco!" Jade called out happily, her most anticipated guests had finally arrived.
"I got to San Francisco first, but I waited for El Toro to split the cab ride here," Viper offered, still supporting a slightly dazed Jackie.
"We have made it in time for the siesta?" Paco asked, peering into the store around his mentor.
"Yup, party hasn't started yet. We have to get rid of an uninvited guest," Jade said, jabbing a thumb at Rank who was shrinking away into the store.
Regathering his courage, but not daring to move closer to the door Rank said, "I'm not leaving until Mr. Chan listens to my offer! This deal could be very lucrative for the both of us. You'd never have to work in this dingy, dusty store again." Rank swept his arm around him, gesturing to the whole store.
"Hey I just dusted yesterday," Ratso whined holding the carefully resembled Cat of Khartoum. Chow got up from his seat and went to Rank, his own annoyance palpable despite the orange tinted glasses hiding his eyes.
"Listen here Crumpet-Stuffer, this is a store. You're not an employee or a customer, so you need to leave, now," Chow said advancing menacingly on Rank. Finn carefully extracted himself from his newly made book fort and went to flank Chow. Ratso, reluctant to set down the Cat of Khartoum, stayed where he was.
Rank looked around in desperation, and backed into the store's counter. He banged his hand into the cash register and cried out, turning around to see what he'd hit. "Well what if I buy something?" Rank said with desperation. He spun around, bearing the Monkey King Puppet in front of him. "Hmmm? How much? You can't throw me out if I want to buy something!"
"That's not for sale!" Jade yelled, she moved to run for Rank, to grab the puppet from him, but was stopped by Hak Fu's firm hand on her shoulder. She looked up at him, craning her neck behind her, and he shook his head at her, silently forbidding her from getting herself involved. Disgruntled Jade crossed her arms and grunted in frustration.
Jackie himself went to lunge as Jade did, but hesitated next to Finn and Chow. He knew he couldn't risk pulling the puppet's leg. "Listen," Jackie said, "That puppet is very dangerous, you need to put it down please."
Rank snorted and looked at the puppet, "Dangerous? It's a children's toy," he said dismissively, waving it at his side.
"No it's not. It's a very old, very dangerous magical puppet. You need to let it go," Jackie tried to convince Rank. He moved slowly towards the man, spreading out to form a loose semi-circle around Rank with Finn and Chow.
"What, I see one giant snake and you think I'll fall for anything? My money's as good as anyone else's, so sell me the stupid puppet, and let's talk business!" Rank demanded, waving the Monkey King Puppet around to punctuate his words.
Viper walked over to the little group that was forming, and leaned to whisper into Jackie's ear "What's up with the puppet?"
Jackie whispered back, "Dark magic, dangerous." Viper nodded at Jackie and went to stand next to him.
"If Jackie says the puppet is dangerous I'd listen to him," Viper said to Rank. She had dressed up for the party, in a lovely red dress, but the dress showed no indication of hindering Viper's movements.
"Listen!" Rank almost yelled as he watched the very large, masked man lay the gifts down and move to join the fray, "I just want to talk to Chan! I need his help! This is my only chance to get it all back. I lost everything because of you!" He jabbed the Monkey King out in front of him, accusing Jackie.
El Toro had nearly reached Finn and Chow, intending to fill out the gap between them, but Paco had already thrown himself into the middle of things. Before anyone could warn the boy, or move to stop him, Paco had leapt in front of Rank and grabbed the legs of the Monkey King Puppet. He yanked on the wooden puppet, trying to reclaim it from Wesley Rank. "Unhand la marioneta mono!" Paco commanded Rank with bravery.
Jackie and Jade seemed to scream as one, "Paco no!" but it was too late.
The Monkey King's eyes glowed brightly red, startling Paco into uttering a small "Huh?" and dropping the puppet's legs. The puppet laughed as a wind funnel of pink smoke lifted Paco and puppet, engulfing them and hiding them from view.
"Paco!" El Toro called in alarm, rushing past the two enforcers and reaching into the magical twister. He blindly sought his young protégé in the smoke, waving his hands in front of him searchingly, they found the shoulders of a figure taller than Paco, and quite a bit furrier.
"Hey, hands off the fur Lucha Libre," the Monkey King sneered at El Toro, and smacked his hand away with his staff. Quick on his feet as he ever was, the Monkey King used a kick to El Toro's stomach to vault himself into a tight backflip onto the counter behind him. He took a quick look around the room, his smile large and mean, "A party? Pour moi? Oh you shouldn't have!"
Hardly moved by the Monkey King's slight form, it was only a moment before El Toro recovered and demanded, "Where is Paco?"
"You mean Pa-nochio?" The Monkey King chuckled and used his staff to sweep the small wooden puppet to El Toro. "Remember, treat for termites regularly and keep out of the rain."
El Toro cradled the puppet gingerly in his large hands. It was a very good likeness of Paco, brown hair and brown eyes. The horror of what had befallen his protégé quickly dawned on the masked wrestler. "Pacito?" he asked softly, "Can you hear me?"
Jackie laid a hand on El Toro's shoulder, and turned to shout at the Monkey King, "Change Paco back!"
"Let me think about that for a second," The Monkey King said, pantomiming extraordinary contemplation. He held up a finger to signal a sudden revelation, "Nahh!" He leapt at Jackie from the counter, swinging his staff, only to have it grabbed by El Toro.
"Change him back," El Toro ordered, quiet rage seething in the quivering of his muscles. The Monkey King tried to wrench his staff from El Toro's grip, but El Toro's fist only held more tightly, and the staff cracked in his hand.
"Ai Yah! Who released the Monkey King!" Uncle cried from the doorway to the back room, having only just walked in.
The Monkey King pulled back his staff, most of it at least, and examined the splintered end. With a shrug he carelessly tossed it over his shoulder, where it smacked Rank who'd been paralyzed with fear.
"Crikey!" Rank screamed, and scrambled around the counter, knocking Uncle over in his escape to the back of the store, and the rear exit.
Taking advantage of the Australian's distraction, the Monkey King flipped himself over El Toro and Jackie, intending to make a beeline to the front door in his own escape. He was waylaid by Jade and her bodyguard, Hak Fu.
"You might as well give up now monkey breath. Even if we can't get you to pull Paco's leg, we'll just use magic to turn you back into a puppet," Jade said smugly.
"I don't think-" the Monkey King began to respond to Jade, only to be interrupted by Hak Fu's quick lunge.
"Cobra bites monkey!" Hak Fu yelled, with a powerful punch aimed at the Monkey's King's face. The Monkey King leapt straight up to dodge, clinging to a ceiling fan. El Toro and Jackie dodged Hak Fu's missed attack, and Jackie used El Toro for a boost and leapt after the Monkey King.
"I guess this means you don't feel like catching up?" the Monkey King quipped, avoiding Jackie's flying kick, but not the subsequent grab which toppled them both to the floor, crashing into Finn's pile of books.
Both were quick to recover, picking themselves up, but Jackie was afforded an extra minute when Viper attacked the Monkey King. Quick and nimble, the Monkey King was focused on blocking and dodging her attacks, when Jade took Jackie's hand and gave him Paco's leg, which she'd recovered from El Toro.
"Get the royal joker to pull Paco's leg Uncle Jackie," she whispered as the Monkey King met his acrobatic match. With a quick nod to Jade, Jackie returned to the fight.
"What's a woman like you doin' in a place like this, sweetheart?" the Monkey King asked Viper, catching one of her kicks and pulling her across him, in a crude imitation of a dancer's pose.
"She was invited," Jackie told the Monkey King grimly, spinning down to kick out with a leg and knock down the Monkey King. The Monkey King pushed Viper away from him and used her shoulders to vault above her head, only for her to kick him in the back as he landed before her. He fell forward with the kick, and Jade wacked him across his stomach with the remains of his own staff.
"You weren't on the guest list Monkey King," Jade said tauntingly.
"Geez the crowd's riled up," The Monkey King glowered. He glanced around the room, and a quick smile cut across his face, "Maybe you should all relax with a good book!" The Monkey King said, taking his staff back from Jade and sweeping it across the room. Pink light shot from the jagged end, sparking throughout the room. The magic embers sunk into books strewn across the room in the struggle, and they glowed pink as they rose into the air.
"Uh, nice book," Jackie told the old tome, which was ruffling its pages at him menacingly.
"You think a bunch of books are gonna scare us? I've had scarier homework assignments," Jade said, eyeing a small trio of paperbacks flittering around her head.
"Oh they'll keep you busy enough while I book it outta here, my dear. Alas for poor Paco-nochio, I ain't going back this time!" The Monkey King spread his arms, and then dramatically swept them before him, "Attack my pretties," he cackled.
Jade covered her head as she ducked away from the dive bombing paperbacks. She barrelled towards the Monkey King who easily stepped out of her path. The books pecked at her, like mean birds, Jade swatted them away, and ran up the book case in front of her, throwing herself into a backflip and landing on her feet. Momentarily the books lost Jade and she was able to look about the shop. The enforcers had all taken cover behind the counter, Hak Fu was trading blows with several aggressive and ancient texts, El Toro was cradling Paco in one arm and holding back the largest book in the entire store, that was trying to slam itself into the wrestler, Viper had grabbed a broom and was swatting away other books at El Toro's side and Jackie was grim-faced and nimble as he worked his way through the store to the gleeful Monkey King.
"Sayonara kiddos! I'll look you up next time I'm in town," The Monkey King called as he turned to leave. Gleeful in his triumph, he missed Jade's charge at him, though he certainly noticed when she slid on her knees between his legs. The books which had locked on to Jade, rammed into the Monkey King's back, slamming him face first into the polished floor, with a loud crack, eliciting a whimper of pain from the royal simian.
Jackie dived after the Monkey King, sliding along the floor, snatching his furry hand, and thrusting the puppet leg into it. Keenly aware of Jackie's intentions, the Monkey King used his free hand to push himself up and in a show of strength, he lifted his entire body above him, and then upside down, glared at Jackie.
"I'm never going back to dollsville again!" The Monkey King declared, and bent himself at the waist so he could grab Jackie by his feet and spin them both, pinning Jackie to the floor and freeing his hand, letting Paco's leg clatter to the ground. Then, as if he had eyes in the back of his head, he grabbed Captain Black's fist, pulling the momentum from the sneaky punch aimed at the back of the Monkey King's skull, down and around, spinning Captain Black off balance and making him fall heavily on Jackie.
"Hello Augustus, I was wondering where you were," Jackie said with a wheeze, slightly dazed after being pinned to the ground and being fallen upon.
Black failed to respond, as the Monkey King had leapt away from the pile of bodies and waved an arm at them, calling several books to break off their attacks and instead dive at Jackie and Black. The books rocketed at them, and Black, managed to roll off of Jackie and pull the other man on top of himself in the roll so they both avoided the literary dive bombs, which hit the floor where the two had been with a loud bang and an explosive puff of paper.
The Monkey King exploited the opportunity and ran to the front door. Unable to resist getting the last word he called back to the room, "Sorry to ditch the party early, but I've got a plane to catch!" He wrenched the door open, knocking Jade aside, who'd been making one last effort to catch the King unaware, and with the gentle ringing chime, the Monkey King was out of the store and gone from sight.
Unfortunately, not from mind, as the menacing flying books were sure to keep carrying out the Monkey King's orders. Jade was curled on her side on the floor, shielding her face against the books, that smacked at her arms and legs. None of the books were particularly large, and thus didn't hit very hard, but they slapped her rapidly and insistently. Suddenly she was yanked across the floor by one of her ankles, and then pulled to her feet, away from the attacking squadron.
Hak Fu, her rescuer, pushed Jade behind him and announced, "Bear protects cub from angry bees!" He met each book that flew at him, with a strike, block or swat. Jade peered around him, and saw that the enforcers had emerged from behind the counter and were fighting off the books with two chairs and a blanket, while El Toro had pinned two of the largest books beneath him, while Viper, having grabbed a heavy crate lid to use as a shield, wielded her broom like a spear, and fought the books off from her and El Toro. Jackie and Captain Black had begun grabbing books from the air and were trying to force them into boxes, drawers, sacks, or anything that might hold them.
"If anyone has any bright ideas on how to put the books to bed, now would be the time!" Finn yelled after blocking three charging books by holding his chair in front of himself, and catching them on the seat. Another knocked into his shoulder, pushing him into Ratso, who managed to catch Finn, only to be pulled off the counter and to the ground by the heavy text that tangled itself in Ratso's blanket.
"Have you learned nothing from Uncle? Magic must defeat magic!" Uncle announced as he strode into the shop, blowfish held before him like a rifle. Uncle started chanting a familiar incantation, "Yuu mo guigui fie dee sau, yuu mo guigui fie dee sau…" He began picking off the books like flies, shooting bright green beams of magic at them, which rendered them once more inert.
"Jackie! Go after Monkey King!" Uncle yelled as he shot down the books. Without hesitating, Jackie turned a flying kick at a hefty anthology of ancient Irish folklore, into a two footed spring from the book, which he used the momentum of in a backflip towards the door.
Jackie was out the door in barely a moment, and Jade would have been right behind her uncle, if Hak Fu hadn't caught Jade in her lunge at the exit. He picked the girl up bodily, set her back on her feet deeper in the store, and he bent to look her in the eyes and told her, "Stay. I will go." Hak Fu then darted out the store, right behind Captain Black.
"Tch, yeah right," Jade remarked under her breath, and would have gone after Jackie regardless of Hak Fu's wishes, if El Toro hadn't called out to her.
"Jade!" El Toro nearly wheezed, with Paco still cradled against his chest, El Toro, slowly rose to his feet. He was worse for wear, having sacrificed one of his arms in protecting Paco, he had essentially fought with one hand.
"Careful big guy," Viper said, pulling El Toro up to his feet by his elbow. The Luchadore was unsteady, but still strong, and walked to Jade.
Wanting to meet her friend half way, Jade also began walking, but quickly remembered Paco's detached leg. Jade darted over to it, snatched it up, and finding it undamaged, handed it to El Toro.
"Gracias Jade," El Toro said, taking the leg. "You said magic could change Paco back yes?" El Toro asked Jade urgently.
"Well," Jade said hesitantly, "Daolon Wong was able to do it, so Uncle…" Jade's voice trailed off as she looked at a Grim faced Uncle.
"It's not so simple. It is the year of the Monkey, which gives the Monkey King power. I fear he will also seek means of increasing his power," Uncle offered grimly. "I do not know the spell which Daolon Wong used to imprison Monkey King, we must hope Jackie succeeds."
"How do we get chuckles to turn Paco back?" Viper asked. She was helping Finn and Ratso untangle themselves, Finn having landed heavily on top of Ratso. She had pulled Finn up by the hand, finding him relatively undamaged, relative to Ratso who rolled over with a groan.
Struck by a sudden memory, Ratso popped up from the ground to say, "Ooh I know this one! The Monkey has to pull the puppet's leg and they'll switch back, right?" Ratso happily sat on the floor, pleased with himself, despite the large Finn shaped bruise forming on his… everything.
"Yes, it is the only certain way to change Paco back," Uncle said.
A grave look passed over El Toro's face, he bent and placed Paco in Jade's arms, "I must aid in the retrieval of the Monkey King." El Toro went to go for the door, and Jade opened her mouth to say something undoubtedly brave, witty and encouraging, but the chime of the door opening rang like a funeral dirge, as Jackie walked back in the store, empty handed, and the words died in Jade's throat.