A/N: hey guys I'm terribly sorry for not updating my stories it's just that I couldn't find the time to write :( so here's a story to make up (hopefully) so again I'm sorry and i hope you like it.
P.S: sorry for any mistakes. English is not my native language
Disclaimer: I do not own Durarara nor any of the characters (wish I did though)
Izaya's POV
Staring at the dark streets of shinjuku and watching as how my humans made their way back to their homes where their loved ones are... Their family, friends, lovers... People that care, love and cherish them...
How come I have none of those?
"I love all my humans so they should love me back..."
But that never happened and it never will, There's only one feeling that my humans harbor for me and that is hate.
I don't know anyone who doesn't.
I took a piece of paper and a pen and began to write.
Those who care for me:
...
Shinra and I aren't that close and he considers me annoying (look who's talking), celty we only talk for business and business only, namie she only tolerates me for the money, mairu and kururi are willing to sell their own brother in order to meet Yūhei Hanejima which happens to be shizuo's brother...
And there's Shizuo Heiwajima the man who hates me more than anyone...funny I happen to feel the opposite for him.
Every since I met him I fell in love with him and there I was I thinking things like 'love at first sight' doesn't exist well I happen to be one of the victims of it, but it wasn't the same for him...
"You piss me off"
Those words hurt greatly and it left me thinking
was it something I said?
did I do something wrong?
Why does he hate me?
my body moved on its own, slashing him with my knife and at that moment I knew it was too late to fix it, too late to correct my mistake, too late to take it back.
Well I never did anything good in my life, my mouth always kept making the words I knew would hurt people, why should this be any different?
I never tried to correct it again for I was afraid of getting hurt, yes dear people even I the great Izaya Orihara can be afraid!
I sighed and placed the pen down and decided to take a little walk to clear my mind.
Walking along the the streets while blending in with my dear humans I let my feet take me to wherever it wants.
Along the way I kept thinking if I should just
End it all...
I mean no one would miss me, why should they?
Unfortunately my feet led me to Ikebukuro.
I quickly turned around to head back to shinjuku but stopped when I heard the sound of my name.
"Izzzzaaaayaaa-kuuuunnn"
Dodging a vending machine that made its way to me I turned around to looked at the person who threw it which would be none other than Shizuo Heiwajima, although I wasn't in the mood for our usual chase I putted on my trade mark smirk.
"Why shizu-chan is that a way to greet an old friend?"
"Shut the hell up! And what do you mean by friend?! I would never be friends with a bastard like you!"
It hurts, it hurts so much to hear him say these things
"Why won't you just die you pathetic flea?! I'm sure you'll be doing Ikebukuro a BIG favor by doing so! Oh and don't worry I'm sure no one will miss you."
I lowered my head just enough for my hair to cover my eyes as my smirk fights to stay in place, geez shizu-chan why must you hurt me like this?
He makes his way towards me stopping only when he's in front of me with a look that only screams hatred.
"You are a sorry excuse for a human"
Stop
"A demon in the flesh"
No please... No more
"Why can't you just die?"
Please...stop...I beg of you...please
"I hate you so damn much"
My heart just shattered into a million pieces, those words...they hurt so goddamn much...
I looked up at Shizuo to say something back but only to see his shocked expression.
"F-flea? Why the hell are you crying?"
I touched my face to feel that my cheeks are moist, I haven't even noticed that I cried.
"Flea? Hey wha- flea!"
I turned around and started running towards my apartment.
I can't believe he just saw me cry how could I let myself be weak in front of him?
Rain started pouring down from the sky, soaking me completely but I could care less, my main goal is to get back home.
I quickly opened the door to my apartment and then slammed it shut, I slid down the said door and hugged my knees.
Then I cried to my hearts content.
I kept crying all throughout the night while remembering all the harsh things Shizuo just said.
But It was all true...
I pictured a world without me, it seemed more bright, pleasant, and happy, all of the people in Ikebukuro and shinjuku celebrating the day of my death.
I smiled at thought of my humans being happy because of my death, so I decided to give them the happiness they long for.
I stood up and grabbed my switch blade from my desk, I took a good look at it, this blade I'm holding will be the key of happiness for both me and my humans but out of all I bet shizu-chan will be the happiest, I can already picture him dancing on top of my grave and saying things like 'The flea is finally dead! Sayonara people I'm heading off to Italy to celebrate!'
I took a piece of paper and a pen and began writing letters to the people I cared about.
the first being my sisters...
To: Mairu and Kururi Orihara
Ne I'm very sorry that you two have a bad brother believe me I tried to be an ideal brother but I just...couldn't, well you guys don't have to worry about dealing with me anymore just remember something... I'll love you guys no matter what okay? No matter how annoying you two can get I'll always love you and again I'm sorry that I became your brother and...
Goodbye
-A bad brother, Izaya Orihara
then next is shinra's
To: Shinra Kishitani
By the time you're reading this I'm already gone but I just want to say thank you for being a friend to me, you are the only one I can consider a friend and I understand if you don't see me as one, thank you for being there for me and I'm sorry...
-An annoying friend, Izaya Orihara
I should probably write one to celty since I'll be gone sooner or late I might as well give her a letter.
To: Celty Sturluson
hello celty! Listen I just wanted to say thank you for your services, I know you don't like to work with a bastard like me but don't worry you won't have to anymore...so hey umm listen I have a gift for you! Just look under my desk and you'll see it! Well that'll be all thank you and sorry
P.S: tell shinra you love him already!
-A pathetic being, Izaya Orihara
Hmm...I should probably leave one for namie too...oh well.
To: Namie Yagiri
So I bet you'll be celebrating about my death huh? Oh and if you're wondering why I decided to write a letter to you, well I just wanted to say thank you for the hard work and also sorry If I'm such a bad boss but well you won't have to deal with me anymore! And don't worry I'm sure you'll find a greater job out there well that'll be all, again I'm sorry.
-A bad boss, Izaya Orihara
And last but not the least...
Shizu-chan...
well since this is my last time I might as well spill every thing here...
To: Shizu-chan
Ne shizu-chan I bet when you hear about my death you'll be jumping all over the place, well can't blame you for being happy.
I'll try to make this short as possible seeing as how your idiotic brain can't handle much of the information anyway.
Ah! Don't rip it apart just yet!
listen I just wanted to say...sorry
now I know you won't believe me and you might be thinking things such as 'the flea can say sorry?' Well for the record I can.
...sorry for all the things I've said, all the things I have done, things like framing you for crimes you didn't do and getting you fired from almost all your jobs.
I know that you hate with all your heart but I want you yo know I feel the opposite of that hate for you, to make it simple for little mind...
I...Love...you
whew I finally said it...
look I know you're disgusted with that but believe me, I do love you, ever since the day we met, and it...hurts you know? The moment you said you hate me, it hurts...
I never really did find out why you said that and it seems I never will.
...I'm really surprised that you've reached this far shizu-chan, I was expecting you rip this letter the moment I said I love you, but oh well you're still unpredictable as always.
well I guess that'll be all, after I'm gone I'm sure Ikebukuro will be peaceful just the way you want and I bet vending machines won't be raining down that much...
I love you...
Now and Forever...
Thank you, I'm sorry and Goodbye
Shizuo...
-Yours truly, the flea
Finishing my last letter, I leaned back at my chair at brought a hand to my face only to feel the tears flowing out of my eyes, I smiled, knowing that all the pain and sadness will be gone along with my life...
I stood up and grabbed my switchblade, placing the cold metal to my wrist I began to cut myself, it was painful but at the same it was relaxing, blood ran down from my wrist to my fingertips I fell to my knees and collapsed into the floor, black spots started invading my vision as slowly fell to unconsciousness, muttering out my final words before finally giving myself to the darkness.
"I love you...Shizuo"
A/N: so did you guys umm uh like it? I hope you do.
anyways this story will only be for two or three chapters and I might finish it later after I get some sleep -_-
I hope you guys liked it!
and also...
Please review~! :)