Summary:
Sougo accidentally gives Kagura her first kiss. Drama and hilarity ensue. Inspired by some funny ass fan art.
Italics for character thoughts. Also, since I've edited this, it is important to mention that this story takes place 2 years from the canon story. (Yes, I know they are in Sazae-san format, but they're all older!) Kagura is 16, Shinpachi 18, Sougo 20, Gin... 2 years closer to being a madao.
Also see footnotes at end of story!
DISCLAIMER: You should already know where this is going, but I don't own Gintama or the wonderful characters in it…all hail Sorachi-sensei!
[Finish Your Popsicles Before They Melt!]
BZZZZ…
BZZZ…
BZZZZ…
"EHHH URUSAI! [1]" Kagura yelled at the buzzing cicadas. She tugged at the collar of her blood red cheongsam and began gathering her long vermillion hair into a ponytail. "It's hot. Sooo hot. Ugh…"
"Woof," her white inugami [2] responded in agreement.
"I'm sorry Sadaharu. I know you really wanted to play in the park, but it's so hot and sweaty outside. I feel like I'm inside one of Gin-chan's boots, uhuh."
She rubbed the fur on his head affectionately and jumped down from his back. Scanning the park, she looked for a nice, shaded area to rest.
"Ah perfect!" she exclaimed, skipping towards a nearby bench. "I'm surprised no one has taken this spot! It's out of the sun and has a nice breeze uhuh! Kamisama must be watching out for us."
The vermillion haired girl plopped down on the bench with Sadaharu lounging off to her left. A few minutes later she began, "You know what would make this even better? Ice cream! I'll go get us some, ok? Gin-chan gave me some money for sukonbu [3] but I'd rather have something cold and sweet right now, uhuh."
Sadaharu barked in understanding, and with that Kagura began her way to a nearby convenience store.
Unfortunately, this was around the same time a certain flaxen-haired police officer was patrolling the area around the park.
xxx
He strolled the streets indifferent to his surroundings, popping a piece of bubblegum in between bored sighs. The unbearable heat forced him to strip off his Shinsengumi coat and roll up his sleeves, but the man was still dripping with sweat. With iconic red mask in hand, Okita Sougo made his way towards his favorite sleeping bench. It had the perfect combination of sun and shade and optimal shrubbery to hide him from a wandering mayo freak. Anyone who frequented the park knew he could be found there four to five times a week, depending on his assigned patrol district. It was undoubtedly his spot.
"Make a mental note to engrave my name on the bench… Nah maybe I'll cover it in spikes when I'm not using it…'"
As Sougo was contemplating various ways to mark his territory, a furry white mass caught his attention. Looking harder, he could see it was the Yorozuya dog - sleeping right next to his bench.
He gripped the hilt of his katana, expecting to see a particularly ferocious China monster nearby. Though sensing no familiar threat, Sougo walked the perimeter of the park just to be sure.
"What owner leaves a giant beast like this unattended?" he asked, unsure of why the Yorozuya girl had such a monstrous pet in the first place. "Fitting, I guess, but maybe she finally decided to abandon this mutt."
"Look," the sadist began as he rounded back to the inugami, "I don't care where you wallow around, just not by my bench. I can smell you from a mile away." But the dog was fast asleep.
"Oi! Did you hear me? You don't have to go back to that rat hole with Danna [4] but just get out of here before I bring you to the pound." He repeated. Sensing that this was going to be unnecessary trouble, Sougo sighed as he sat on the bench. He began by prodding at the dog's nose to no avail. He then lifted Sadaharu's ear and yelled half-heartedly, "Ooiii! Sa…Saladaru (shit, what was its name?) there's a hot poodle swimming by the lake!" Again met with silence, Sougo stood up and attempted to push the dog farther away. When this obviously failed, he started to poke and prod it harder with his sheathed sword.
Minutes later, Kagura returned from the store humming an old B'z song and sucking on a sukonbu flavored popsicle.
As she was walking the path back to her Sadaharu and the bench, Sougo jabbed the sleeping dog hard enough to finally wake him up and piss him off. With eyes still closed, Sadaharu snarled and smacked the intruder with the force of a thousand Armstrong cannons. Okita, caught off guard, was sent flying in the same direction Kagura arrived from.
"Abunai! [4]" a nearby pedestrian exclaimed, interrupting Kagura's solo.
"Huh?" she asked while opening her eyes. Immediately she saw a dark figure flying directly towards her. Without time to react, she shifted her parasol and dropped the ice cream as the human missile came barreling in her direction. The next thing she knew, Kagura was smacked square in the face and the velocity of the throw flung them both back several yards before toppling to the floor. A large thud was heard throughout the vicinity of the park and dirt from the impact clouded the sight from nearby pedestrians. When the dust settled and she regained consciousness moments later, Kagura found herself staring into sandy strands of hair hovering above her. Her body, sore from the blow, was pinned to the ground and her face stung like she had been punched square in the jaw.
"Oi…What happened?" she murmured to herself as she lifted the boulder on top of her. When she pushed it above her torso, her vision finally steadied enough to recognize exactly what had hit her.
In her delicate yet strong hands was a sadistic bastard looking back at her with half-lidded eyes, and around his mouth—a thin ring of the popsicle juice she just ate.
[1] urusai: Shut up!
[2] inugami: dog god (what Sadaharu is)
[3] sukonbu: pickled seaweed
[4] Danna: "boss," also what Sougo frequently calls Gin.
[5] abunai: Look out!
A/N: There might be other things that I forgot to reference here but… oh well.
I apologize for the story not having any major action and romance… I definitely have it planned for future chapters (that's where the fun happens!).
Again, please R&R, I would really appreciate it.