Disclaimer: If I owned Princess Tutu Rue probably would have died at the end. (Sorry to all Rue fans!)
Mini Authors Note: Hey! If you liked this, would mind sharing it with people by voting for it in the .moon UFO Awards? If you like the other stories better than go ahead and vote for them, no hard feelings, but still, it'd be nice to be seconded.
I tried so hard and I was so close… so close… In the end it didn't even matter.
Why her? Why did he pick her over me? It's a selfish thought, I know, but I still hadn't figured out why and it was eating away at me.
I'm Princess Tutu, I gave hope to everyone and then I was supposed fade away. There is happiness for those who accept their destiny? If someone else had the destiny that I did he or she wouldn't accept it. Most people would have preferred not to live than to accept it. But they didn't have such a destiny, I did and I accepted it for the sake of a smile.
Prince Mytho, he was so handsome, so gentle, and so… lonely. I only wanted to see him smile, but before I knew what was happening I was drowning. His smile, even a smile without his full heart, was intoxicating. It was a slow poison in my veins bringing me closer and closer to the brink of insanity.
I didn't want to complete his heart. If he had his heart, then he wouldn't need me and I'd be forgotten. Ahiru, that little duck, if it wasn't for her I probably would have stalled the completion until Fakir had a chance to break the heart again. But she was there and I didn't stall so now things have ended up the way they are.
The Prince chose Rue, not me. I never understood why. I was the one who was helping him; she was the one in the way. I was the one who had given up my very existence for him, yet the one time she confessed made him forget everything she had done in the past and he made her his princess. It wasn't fair. I was trapped, wandering around the confines of Mytho's heart and I didn't even know why he picked the raven over me.
Being in the heart had some perks, though they were limited. I could watch his dreams and protect him from his nightmares. I know it sounds silly; I still wanted to protect him even though he rejected me. I couldn't help it. I loved him, I still do and I always will.
I made a deal with a demon. I promised not to hinder Drosselmeyer and let him take control of one of Mytho's dreams if he let me be apart of one. Even the sweetest princess can be overcome with envy and selfish thoughts. I just… I just wanted to be able to talk to him again.
I appeared on a fog filled lake, Mytho was dancing nearby. It was a familiar dream that I had seen many times as Ahiru.
"Will you dance with me, my prince?"
"Princess Tutu?"
I saw his eyes widen and his breath hitched. He took a step away from me. Why was he scared? Had I done something to cause him to fear me?
"Oh. I get it. This is a dream."
He relaxed when he convinced himself that I was an illusion, which, in a way I was, and he took my hand.
So many months had gone by since I last danced a pas de deux. The feeling of warmth when Mytho held me in his arms, no one who has never been in love would understand.
"Prince, did you love me?"
Mytho's movement stiffened and he averted his eyes from my gaze.
"I chose Rue for my princess."
"I realize that, but that was not my question. Fakir said that when he read The Prince and the Raven to you I was the character that intrigued you the most, so I will ask you again. Did you love me?"
"Yes."
He dropped my hands and turned his back to me.
"Then why did you pick her?"
Mytho, I don't know what happened, but when he turned to face me again a steady stream of blood was running from the tip of finger into the water, staining the lake red.
"The blood of the raven lives in me, turning everything dark. I wanted to keep something pure. Princess Tutu, you are the embodiment of hope. Something like that should not be tainted by raven blood."
"But, Rue was the one who gave you the raven's blood. How is it fair that you chose her?!"
I didn't mean to lose my calm demeanor, but I couldn't help it. I was always helping other people with their struggles and emotional issues, but I bottled my own feelings inside. I had no one to talk to. There was no one to help me solve my problems. The dam in my heart had burst and my feelings were overflowing.
Mytho's lips pursed into a thin line. He sighed and gave me a wry smile.
"We are the same. We are both humans with raven blood running through our veins. Rue knows what I'm going through because she is going through the same thing. She saved me from the Monster Raven with her love. That sort of helpless love is something that I must protect."
I couldn't stop the tears from rolling down my cheeks. I had always hoped that the prince had loved me and wanted me for his princess, that he just chose Rue out of pity. But he really did love her, not me.
"But this is a dream," I looked up as Mytho spoke again, "one of my fantasies. Here I can let go of responsibility and give in to my desires."
He pulled me close to him; I could hear his heart beating. It had such a beautiful rhythm. He tilted my chin up and pressed his forehead against mine.
I was dazed. I thought he loved Rue. But if that was true, then why was his heart beating so fast for me?
"I really did, no, I still love you."
Our breaths mingled together as the gap between our mouths narrowed. Mytho softly bushed his lips against mine in a feather light kiss. I felt like my heart was going to stop. Mytho seemed to gain confidence and leaned in closer for a deeper kiss, but the light of morning stopped him before his lips could reclaim my own.
Sunlight streamed through the velvet drapes of the palace. Prince Mytho woke to see his princess, Rue, sleeping next to him.
"What a strange dream."
Mytho had seen dreams of Princess Tutu before, but she had never seemed so real. Usually when he saw her she was collecting heart shards or dancing to defeat the ravens, things that Mytho could remember her doing in the past. This dream was the first time he had seen Tutu so defenseless in her tears. It was unnerving. She had been there for him during the battle with the ravens and he wished that he could've repaid her kindness, even if she was just a dream.
His thoughts drifted to their brief kiss. The prince's cheek darkened when he imagined those few moments of bliss. Rue snuggling into his chest snapped him out of his daydream and brought up guilty feelings of betrayal. Rue had saved him, the very least he could do was try to be a loyal husband. But images of Tutu still danced through his mind.
"Mytho, why are you awake so early? Did you have another nightmare?"
"No, the one from yesterday was the first I've had since the end of Drosselmeyer's story. This dream… was nice. I would have liked to dream it a little longer."
I tried so hard and my efforts didn't go to waste.
Rue may be the prince's princess, but I will always be in his heart.
(Author's Note: Wow. I think this is the longest one-shot I've ever written. If there's confusion about the whole Tutu and Ahiru being different people thing I'll just say that Tutu and Ahiru seem really different in the anime so I portrayed them as different characters. If you don't like that I made Ahiru similar to a reincarnation of Princess Tutu or how Mytho loves Tutu you may consider this AU. Constructive criticism would be greatly appreciated because I bothered writing this and I think it would be a shame if no one even went, "Awwww." Etc.)