It was a bit of a cloudy for a day at a theme park, but when you
trusted your archenemy to plan you and your friend's vacation, well, you
gotta hope for the best. Link quickly noted that Gannondorf had
deliberately distracted him so they would crash their car into a tree.
Unknown to Link, was that Gannondorf had previously held a knife at Malon's
neck, but when he realized Link was inside paying for gas and couldn't see
Malon trying to squirm away, he just put her back in the car. Link came
back completely clueless cursing the Arabs and their gasoline monopoly, his
wallet much lighter. As the group walked to the park gates, Link put on
his Golden Gauntlets and punched Gannon in the shoulder, just for fun.
They approached the gate, but Link didn't have any money (Blame the Arabs.). "Malon, have any money?"
"No, I don't know what happened to it," was her hopeless reply.
"How about you, Gannon?"
"Yeah, sure, here!" Gannon reached into his pockets, and whispered into Link's ear, "I stole it from Malon."
Link punched him in the nose (Which is a very big target) and took the money. He frowned, "It's still not enough.Oh! Wait, Zelda! Ruto! Have any cash?"
They completely ignored him. He tried their 'Other' names, "Oh, most highest and most esteemed Princesses of Hyrule who are greatest in their generosity and," Link swallowed, "and, uh, beauty? Can we borrow your money that you will so generously provide?"
"Yes, like sure, Link," said Zelda, sounding just as dim-witted as ever, handing Link a money bag bigger than Gannondorf's nose.
"This is more than enough," Link whispered, pocketing the change.
This whole business of calling Zelda and Ruto "The most highest and most esteemed Princesses of Hyrule who are greatest in their generosity and beauty" started last summer. Gannon was holding Zelda hostage (as he normally did), but this time, it was because all the toilet paper in Hyrule was missing and Gannon couldn't hold it any longer. People can get very desperate when they can't wipe their ass and well, he took Zelda hostage until Link could discover more toilet paper. Of course, Link was getting tired of rescuing this particularly stupid princess, so he found some toilet paper for himself and left it at that. Even if Gannon had got the new toilet paper, he would have kept some for himself, and then sold the rest (Via telephone!) to the other, very desperate citizens of Hyrule, and it'd be gone soon enough. Anywho, back to the park:
Link handed the man at the gate a fat wad of bills. He was a geeky looking teen with acne and glasses. "Thank you sir, it took you long enough." He peered out the gate window, first at Link's tunic, then Gannon's, uh, armor/clothes, then at Malon's normal looking dress, then at Zelda, then, finally, at Ruto. "I'm sorry sir, but she's violating the dress code here at Bushy Gardens. She needs to wear clothes to get in."
Link explained, "Oh, that's a, a, it's a costume! Yeah, she's training, to, uh, be a mascot? Maybe?"
An unfamiliar voice whispered in Link's ear, "So you want her to go in naked? You sure about that?"
"NO!" Link quickly shouted, "No, uh, do you have any extra clothes she can borrow?"
"Park policy says extras must be kept at each gate for these kind of occasions, sir!" he replied, handing over a red shirt and blue overalls.
Ruto felt overly proud of herself to wear clothes, even if she looked like an evil mutant plumber with them on. Link looked around for the voice he heard. "Psst! Link! Over here, by Malon!" it said again.
"Malon, did you hear something?"
"Yes, but what is it?"
"Oh! Wait!" it shouted, "My bad! Sorry, just a sec."
Right then a figure slowly appeared next to Malon. It was a teenage boy, same age as Link, and looked almost like Link but with straight brown hair and green eyes. He wore a black T-shirt that said "Zelda 64", a black baseball cap that had a Weird looking 'G' with the words "Nintendo Gamecube" under it, and a black backpack with "Nintendo" on all the zippers, and finally army green cargo pants.
The apparition was expected to say, 'I'm a ghost,' or maybe, 'You're going to die,' but no, it had to say, "Hi, my name's Drake. I'm from the future."
That was the breaking point. Link surged forward and slashed Drake right across the face. It didn't do anything. He tried again. Nothing.
The geeky teen at the gate shouted, "Hey, mister, no weapons allowed. I'll call security!"
"Oh, er, its just a prop!"
"Okay sir, you go ahead."
"Normally, I'd say 'ow.' But I'm from the future, so I don't exist yet. You can't hurt me. The only thing you can do is look at me. So go ahead. Look."
"We just did, moron, and why do you have her name on your shirt?" Malon said, pointing to Zelda. There was just something about a boy that looked like Link having preferences to Zelda and not to her that bugged her. She knew it was jealousy, but she couldn't help it.
"Oh, that. It's a future thing. They make a video-game out of you guys a thousand years from now. See, I'm from the future, and you guys make one awesome game. Too bad it's called 'Legend of Zelda' instead of 'Legend of Link.'"
Everyone stared at him confused. "We won't ask."
"Good, 'cuz I won't explain. Where is that sword stealin,' ocarina stealin,' prat of a princess anyway?"
That was enough proof for Malon that Drake was an okay guy. "She's over there."
Drake glared at her like a demon from the netherworld. He took out a breadcrumb and threw it at her dress.
"NO!" Zelda screamed. "Guys, we like, totally need to get to a bathroom, so I can like, change my clothes, because like, this idiot like ruined my dress. Like, please?"
"I didn't get a word of that. Malon, translate?" Link asked.
Malon sighed. "She wants to find a bathroom so she can change her clothes."
"Should we?"
"No, just let that breadcrumb bother her," Malon said with a great deal of pleasure and malice.
They approached the gate, but Link didn't have any money (Blame the Arabs.). "Malon, have any money?"
"No, I don't know what happened to it," was her hopeless reply.
"How about you, Gannon?"
"Yeah, sure, here!" Gannon reached into his pockets, and whispered into Link's ear, "I stole it from Malon."
Link punched him in the nose (Which is a very big target) and took the money. He frowned, "It's still not enough.Oh! Wait, Zelda! Ruto! Have any cash?"
They completely ignored him. He tried their 'Other' names, "Oh, most highest and most esteemed Princesses of Hyrule who are greatest in their generosity and," Link swallowed, "and, uh, beauty? Can we borrow your money that you will so generously provide?"
"Yes, like sure, Link," said Zelda, sounding just as dim-witted as ever, handing Link a money bag bigger than Gannondorf's nose.
"This is more than enough," Link whispered, pocketing the change.
This whole business of calling Zelda and Ruto "The most highest and most esteemed Princesses of Hyrule who are greatest in their generosity and beauty" started last summer. Gannon was holding Zelda hostage (as he normally did), but this time, it was because all the toilet paper in Hyrule was missing and Gannon couldn't hold it any longer. People can get very desperate when they can't wipe their ass and well, he took Zelda hostage until Link could discover more toilet paper. Of course, Link was getting tired of rescuing this particularly stupid princess, so he found some toilet paper for himself and left it at that. Even if Gannon had got the new toilet paper, he would have kept some for himself, and then sold the rest (Via telephone!) to the other, very desperate citizens of Hyrule, and it'd be gone soon enough. Anywho, back to the park:
Link handed the man at the gate a fat wad of bills. He was a geeky looking teen with acne and glasses. "Thank you sir, it took you long enough." He peered out the gate window, first at Link's tunic, then Gannon's, uh, armor/clothes, then at Malon's normal looking dress, then at Zelda, then, finally, at Ruto. "I'm sorry sir, but she's violating the dress code here at Bushy Gardens. She needs to wear clothes to get in."
Link explained, "Oh, that's a, a, it's a costume! Yeah, she's training, to, uh, be a mascot? Maybe?"
An unfamiliar voice whispered in Link's ear, "So you want her to go in naked? You sure about that?"
"NO!" Link quickly shouted, "No, uh, do you have any extra clothes she can borrow?"
"Park policy says extras must be kept at each gate for these kind of occasions, sir!" he replied, handing over a red shirt and blue overalls.
Ruto felt overly proud of herself to wear clothes, even if she looked like an evil mutant plumber with them on. Link looked around for the voice he heard. "Psst! Link! Over here, by Malon!" it said again.
"Malon, did you hear something?"
"Yes, but what is it?"
"Oh! Wait!" it shouted, "My bad! Sorry, just a sec."
Right then a figure slowly appeared next to Malon. It was a teenage boy, same age as Link, and looked almost like Link but with straight brown hair and green eyes. He wore a black T-shirt that said "Zelda 64", a black baseball cap that had a Weird looking 'G' with the words "Nintendo Gamecube" under it, and a black backpack with "Nintendo" on all the zippers, and finally army green cargo pants.
The apparition was expected to say, 'I'm a ghost,' or maybe, 'You're going to die,' but no, it had to say, "Hi, my name's Drake. I'm from the future."
That was the breaking point. Link surged forward and slashed Drake right across the face. It didn't do anything. He tried again. Nothing.
The geeky teen at the gate shouted, "Hey, mister, no weapons allowed. I'll call security!"
"Oh, er, its just a prop!"
"Okay sir, you go ahead."
"Normally, I'd say 'ow.' But I'm from the future, so I don't exist yet. You can't hurt me. The only thing you can do is look at me. So go ahead. Look."
"We just did, moron, and why do you have her name on your shirt?" Malon said, pointing to Zelda. There was just something about a boy that looked like Link having preferences to Zelda and not to her that bugged her. She knew it was jealousy, but she couldn't help it.
"Oh, that. It's a future thing. They make a video-game out of you guys a thousand years from now. See, I'm from the future, and you guys make one awesome game. Too bad it's called 'Legend of Zelda' instead of 'Legend of Link.'"
Everyone stared at him confused. "We won't ask."
"Good, 'cuz I won't explain. Where is that sword stealin,' ocarina stealin,' prat of a princess anyway?"
That was enough proof for Malon that Drake was an okay guy. "She's over there."
Drake glared at her like a demon from the netherworld. He took out a breadcrumb and threw it at her dress.
"NO!" Zelda screamed. "Guys, we like, totally need to get to a bathroom, so I can like, change my clothes, because like, this idiot like ruined my dress. Like, please?"
"I didn't get a word of that. Malon, translate?" Link asked.
Malon sighed. "She wants to find a bathroom so she can change her clothes."
"Should we?"
"No, just let that breadcrumb bother her," Malon said with a great deal of pleasure and malice.