It all started with a stupid game! Sam had thought of it, to cheer Dean up.
"Come on man, just imagine Cas being drunk and saying stuff like Never have I ever stepped on an ant! We will laugh and it will be good for us! Charlie is here and Kevin can use some off time too. Poor kid's been locked in that room forever. Translating the word of God is not that fun I bet!"
Sam had argued well and so Dean had finally given in, calling Castiel down, gathering shots and alcohol. He hadn't played 'Never have I ever' in a long time but he was sure no one played with whiskey. Poor everybody else though, because Dean drank nothing but whiskey!
Sam had gone and dragged the kids down, making them and Cas sit on the damn floor, Indian style, as if they were actually teenagers! Dean's back was already crying in protest but he bit down on his tongue, deciding to give Sammy this one little joy.
"Alright, here's all we need I guess." He announced as he dropped to the floor beside his brother, completing their circle.
"Wait, can Kevin even drink?" He asked suddenly realizing how old the kid really was.
Kevin rolled his eyes, snorting hysterically.
"Three years Dean! Three years of me drinking myself away from the headaches caused by translating and NOW you start to question it? Now that I'm finally 21?"
Dean shrugged, feeling really guilty already. These people were all filled with 'Never have I ever's and all of it was because of him.
Sam cleared his throat and started talking with what seemed like excitement and Dean let go of the dreading feeling in his stomach. He had enough time to think about it later.
"So, for those of you who don't know, 'Never have I ever' is a game where each person tells about something they never did or never tried or heard and so on, and everyone else who HAS done that, has to drink a shut. Are we clear?"
Castiel glanced at the bottles and then at Sam.
"But that way we will get drunk Sam. I'm not sure if that is wise. Shouldn't we play with a less toxic drink?" He said, clearly remembering the last time he had been drunk.
"come on Cas! You don't get drunk with a few shuts! It took a whole store to get you drunk!" Dean said, for the sake of Sammy. It wasn't fair of them to jump the guy for wanting to have a little fun.
Castiel though looked very unconvinced.
"I was a much more powerful angel then, Dean! I had my grace intact and heaven was in somewhat of an order." The angel said, his eyes pinning Dean down, challenging him to talk back!
Challenge accepted!
"Come on dude! Even if you DO get drunk, what's so bad about it? Its time we pull that stick out of your ass anyways!"
Castiel seemed like he would very much love to slap Dean but he glanced at Sam and seemed to get on board with Dean's plan.
"OK..."
Sam looked shocked but he didn't say anything else, turning to Charlie. "You OK with this? Don't hold back if you have protests too!" He said sarcastically, as he filled everyone's glasses for the first round.
Charlie laughed and shook her head.
"Nah... I'm more than fine. Honestly its so boring here in the bunker! I could use some fun!" She paused, looking around excitedly. "OK, I'll start and we'll go clockwise, agreed?"
They all nodded and Charlie started.
"OK, Never have I ever hunted a wendigo!"
Sam and Dean both rolled their eyes and had to drink up while the others laughed at their faces. Next up was Kevin.
"Never have I ever hunted a ghost!" He said, something shining in his eyes as everyone watched Sam and Dean drink again. Next up was Castiel, which to Dean's surprise looked like he was enjoying this. Like he was laughing internally at a secret joke.
"Never have I ever hunted a werewolf!"
As Dean downed his third shot,it hit him what was happening.
"HEY! That's not fair! You have a literal GUIDE to what the two of us have done, called the supernatural books, and this is so not fair!" He protested but his words weren't holding any real stigma behind them. After all like he'd said, so what if he got drunk, right?
He was next, so he put down his glass, thinking hard about what to say.
What was it that he'd never done? There was almost nothing on the book of crazy that he hadn't done at least once in his life.
"Never have I ever watched Harry Potter!" He finally said, feeling proud as Kevin, Charlie and Sam had to drink.
"Never have I ever got hit on by a boy!" Sam said next and Dean had to try really hard not to punch his brother as everyone laughed at him when he downed his shut after Charlie.
And so it went on, with Castiel, Kevin and Charlie ganging up against the Winchesters and Sam and Dean hitting anyone they could.
"Never have I ever touched the clouds!"
"Never have I ever had wings!"
"Never have I ever stabbed a person!"
"Never have I ever slept with a werewolf!" Sam had slapped Dean on the back of his neck for that one and responded with "Never have I ever slept with an amazon warrior!" And Dean came back with "Never have I ever killed my brother's daughter!" Making Sam to shut up. They were all getting really drunk and really loud and Dean remembered very belatedly that Sammy was a sad drunk.
"Never have I ever understood how you could tell me I'm a monster and then come back for me Dean..." His brother had said and everyone had frozen.
"What?" Dean said stupefied. What the hell was Sam talking about? He had real goddamn tears in his eyes! What the hell?
"Right before I killed Lilith, I checked my voice mail and you had left me a message and you told me Dad always said you'd either have to save me or kill me and that you were done trying to save me... You said I was a monster, a vampire... And then there you were, trying to save me from what I.."
Sam fell silent and Dean just stared at his brother's face, trying to process what he'd just heard.
"I said what?" He finally spat out, looking at all the others to make sure he wasn't just making this up with his drunk mind.
Sam didn't answer though. He just kept his gaze on his glass, his hands shaking with all the repressed emotions he had held in so long.
"Sam... Sammy, never have I ever said any of those things... What the hell are you even talking about? I DID leave you a message but that was the exact opposite of what you just said..." Dean said, his drunk mind thinking this was the best explanation but apparently it wasn't because Sam just shook his head.
"It was what I said Dean. I remember every damn word...because it felt like someone carved them into my heart..."
Dean was lost.
"Sam when I called, it was to say I was sorry for telling you to go and never come back. I said I was sorry and that I wasn't dad, that I was your brother and that never changed no matter what..." He looked at Cas for help. "Cas was there! He heard it!"
Sam looked at Cas, as if his life was in the hands of the angel and Castiel,as drunk as he could be, looked panicked at the mentioned memory.
"Dean is telling the truth Sam. He later tried to fight me and Zachariah so that we would bring him to you and well you know how everything happened from there." He managed to say anyways. Dean thanked his friend in his mind.
But Sam looked even more confused now.
"But..."
"Oh for the love of god! Has none of you actually READ the fucking books?" Charlie cried out, sounding like she was done with all of them.
"Chuck explained it all guys! Ruby changed the damn message so Sam would go in and kill Lilith! He knew Sam would back off if he heard Dean apologizing."
Silence fell over the room as Sam stared at his fingers with wide eyes and Dean thought about what Charlie had just said.
"So... One little apology sooner from me, and we wouldn't have had to go through apocalypse and Sam wouldn't have to jump in the pit? Are you telling me that I could have prevented all that with just a damn apology that Sam actually heard?"
"Yeah Dean..." The words came but to Deans surprise, out of Sam's mouth.
"All I ever needed was YOUR approval..."
Sam said and Dean wasn't sure exactly what happened, but they stopped playing after that and everyone just wandered to their own corner.
It wasn't until later that night, when Dean found Sam alone in his room, that he answered his little brother.
"You know you have it Sammy right? My approval?"
Sam looked up in his brother's eyes, the green locking with the hazel, and he could read the honest words in Dean's eyes.
"Yeah..." He pulled Dean down for a kiss and smiled against his lips. "Now I do..."