A/N: Just a little crack I came up with, really short…this took place during R1

Disclaimer: I do not own Code Geass

Toilet Paper and Masks

Lelouch grumbled to himself. He had been holding it during the entire meeting because he did not want to throw off his cool, so when he finally returned to his quarters, he rushed in to the restroom after throwing his cape and mask aside. He had been too impatient and missed one crucial detail before he started his business. His eyes roamed around the tiny room as he considered his options…

Lelouch immediately thought of C.C. when trying to think of whom to ask for help. However, C.C. was not with the core of the Black Knights right now, since she was on a mission in the Chinese Federation.

Just then, the sound of the automatic door to his quarters opening reached his ears. Lelouch looked up in alarm. He had thrown aside his mask and cape and now he can't even go outside to retrieve lest he revealed his identity.

Kallen looked around the office that was Zero's personal quarters in the RV he had somehow able to acquire for the Black Knights. She was impressed. Not just with the RV but it had such a spacious office on top, it even had a small restroom to the side.

However, Kallen was confused. She was sure Zero was in here, but the masked vigilante was nowhere to be seen. Did he leave already? Impossible! He would've passed the other knights if he left since there was only one entrance and exit. She looked at one the small windows and decided that those were too small to climb through. They were all locked anyways, and he couldn't have locked them from the outside.

"Who's out there?" Kallen jumped and drew her pouch knife before she realized it came from the restroom.

"Zero?" she asked uncertainly.

"It is I," answered the voice.

Kallen's eyes narrowed in suspicion. She knew Zero's voice was modulated from the mask he wore so his real voice was probably different, but this voice seemed awfully familiar to her. She just couldn't place it.

Kallen saw a gleam and looked to right to see Zero's mask and cape lying on the floor.

Lelouch sighed in relief, it was just Kallen. Wait, Kallen? She could not find out about his identity. What little relief he felt instantly vanished to be replaced by panic again.

"Zero?" Kallen asked again. "Sorry, I see you're busy so I'll be going now."

"Wait!" Lelouch yelled.

"Yes?"

Lelouch reconsidered his options and saw that there was no other way around this. "Can you…get me a roll of toilet paper?" he asked, trying to sound like the collected Zero.

There was silence for moment.

"What!" Kallen yelled.

Kallen stood frozen in her place. Did Zero just ask her to get him toilet paper? Zero was clumsy enough to forget toilet paper? Her image of Zero has just changed dramatically.

"Yes…I seem to have run out," Zero replied from behind the door.

Kallen considered running out before she saw the mask on the ground again. Zero wasn't wearing his mask! This would be the perfect opportunity to find out his true identity. His voice was already familiar to her.

"Where…" Kallen asked nervously, "Is it?"

"Should be in one of the cabinets…" Zero replied.

Kallen searched and found the rolls of soft tissue. Kallen knew Zero had to be human, what else could he be? However, this experience has really humanized Zero in Kallen's eyes. She never knew how much she idolized the masked man until now, when compared this human side of him.

"Ok, I found it," Kallen said as he approached the restroom.

"Wait!" Zero yelled out again.

Lelouch could not believe he overlooked something so trivial again. The door to the bathroom, like the door to his office, was an automatic slide door. Once opened, his face will be full view, along with other parts of his body. This wasn't a hinged swinging door where you can just open a crack.

Lelouch had to think fast. How should he retrieve the package while keeping his identity safe? He regretted throwing off his helmet. Looking around the restroom, he saw several towels.

'They're the only available material in this room now anyways…' Lelouch thought to himself.

Kallen clutched the roll of white fiber, impatient. This was her chance to see Zero's true face. What he looks like, old or young, or if he was even a he at all.

"Ok, come forward." Zero said. Kallen noted the voice was no slightly muffled.

Kallen stood in front of the restroom door for ten seconds before the door opened. Kallen gasped at what she saw…

Zero had wrapped a white towel completely around his head. Kallen stood there in shock until she saw Zero's outstretched hand. She had to ask…

"Zero…why the towel…?" Kallen asked.

"What?" Zero asked. "Don't question me; just give me the damn toilet paper."

Kallen flinched at Zero's harsh voice, but she also heard the embarrassment behind it.

Zero swiped at the air, attempting to grab the roll of white but missed by several inches. He growled underneath his towel mask.

Kallen just seemed to realize he was in the restroom and blushed while her eyes reflexively looked down out of curiosity. Zero had covered himself with a towel there too. As her eyes roamed back up, she noted Zero's slender figure. The cape had given off the image that Zero had much broader shoulders but he was actually quite skinny.

Zero swiped again and missed, "Kallen!"

"Yes sir!" Kallen said as she remembered what she was supposed to be doing. She quickly handed Zero the toilet paper and backed out.

Zero fumbled with the door controls for a bit before the door finally closed. Before the door closed however, the towel around Zero's head loosened and Kallen saw black hair and a flash of purple before the door obstructed her view completely.

"Now leave!" Zero ordered through the door.

"Yes sir!" Kallen saluted, though the man – or boy – could not see. She ran out of the office and closed the door before leaning back against it.

'Could Zero be… ?' Kallen thought to herself. 'No way'

Kallen decided she would not mention this incident to anyone ever again, and left their mobile headquarters trying to forget what happened.

A/N: yeah, just a short drabble.