I was falling.

Wind roared in my ears, my hair whipped around me, and all I saw was white. My heart thundered, I struggled to breath and I flailed around looking for anything to grab onto. Fear sunk into my bones, but there was another feeling tumbling around in me. I was sad. No more than sad, I was heart broken.

I was so upset that my actual heart hurt. I don't know why I was so sad, but I was. But I wasn't just sad, I was regretful and had a strong feeling of wanting something. Why can't I remember anything?

Why was I falling? Where am I? What did I fall from?

In a matter of seconds colors blurred together and a loud smack filled my ears. Physical pain matched my emotional pain in forms of a headache and every bone in my body screamed out. Screams erupted making my headache worse. I wanted to yell at them to shut up, but I couldn't move my lips. In fact, I couldn't open my eyes or move or even breathe. Among the screams I heard someone shouting orders, but everything started to fade to black and I couldn't understand what they were saying.

There was a moment of peace then. I saw nothing but darkness, heard nothing but silence, my pain washed away and I felt like I was floating. In the peace one thought crossed my mind. I understand, I forgive you. And then nothing.

Everything hit me full force. My lungs burned as I sat up gasping for air. My eyes snapped open only to shut from the bright light. And my body screamed out from my muscles clenching and I fell back down against the concrete. Men around me jumped back and pulled a lightweight blanket off of me before crowding around me and barking orders. Everything after that blurs together in a muddle of sirens, masks, coldness, beeps, and so many questions. Who are you, where were you falling from, how did you get up there, why did you jump. All answered with the same blank look and silence. I had no memories prior to falling, not even a name. Then came the whispers, nurses outside the door as if I couldn't hear them. Whispers of miracles and the impossible. A true blessing I survived, scarred with nothing but a few bruises and two long cuts down my back.

I have been here for a whole week now. There are no hospital records of me or dental records match my teeth. I still have my wisdom teeth though and I look young so they are assuming I'm still a teenager, but they have no idea how old. They had me take a test, the results haven't come back yet but it will reveal what grade I should be in mentally. Detective Ukita walked back into the room pulling me from my thoughts, and with him was Doctor Yoshi.

I faked a smile, something I'm quite good at I discovered over my time being here. This whole time I've been here I have felt nothing but despair and an overwhelming feeling of want. But I have no idea what I want. It's just a big hole in my chest wanting to be filled. Doctor Yoshi smiled back but Detective Ukita more so grimaced. Well this can't be good.

Doctor Yoshi stepped forward looking positive. "I have some good news, thanks to our recent scans we have finally concluded that you are seventeen or eighteen, but considering you still have your wisdom teeth, that puts you at more so seventeen. The results came in from those schooling tests and might I say you scored extraordinarily high! Puts you in senior year taking advanced classes, matches up perfectly with our age deductions." Yoshi tells me.

I give him a small smile, not at all feeling comforted by his words. "That's great news Doctor, thank you so much for all you have done for me."

My eyes start to drift towards Detective Ukita, prompting him to reveal why he was here. He shuffled his feet and cleared his thought a few times, revealing how nervous he truly was. "There still have been no new reports of missing persons made that match your description. I'm sorry, but now that the hospital has labeled you as 17, child protective services are stepping in and are going to put you in foster care. Considering that you still have no memory you will be receiving documentation showing you are a Japanese citizen, we just need you to pick a name and birthdate and we will be giving you a birth certificate and a social security number. But until you turn 18 and graduate high school your CPS agent will hold onto it." Ukita told me.

I felt my heart break at his news. No one's looking for me. I'm all alone.

Ukita must have seen the look on my face because he rushed forward and grabbed my hand. I quickly mask my face again and smile at him sweetly. "Detective Ukita you have done so much for me, I don't know how I will ever repay you. I am truly grateful for your help," I tell him squeezing his hand.

"I'm sorry I couldn't have done more," He says squeezing my hand back.

"There was nothing else you could have done," I tell him feeling my eyes begin to water, but I hide it all with a smile, not letting them in on my true emotions. I look at both the detective and the doctor, "I'm suddenly feeling tired, is it ok if you leave so I may get some rest?" I ask them, more and more water gathers in my eyes making everything appear blurry. Stop. I will not cry in front of them.

"Of course miss! Just don't forget what we told you, we will come by tomorrow for the name you picked out and a birthdate." Doctor Yoshi announced.

My lower lip trembled for a second causing me to smile brighter, "Of course! I'll have it ready for you by then," I tell him with a wave of my hand.

They must have believed it because they said their goodbyes before getting up and leaving. I had to bit my lip to stop myself from yelling at them to just leave already. They closed the door behind them and the resounding click echoed throughout the small room, effectively breaking the dam.

I crumpled in on myself as sobs escaped my mouth, allowing myself to cry for the first time since I got here. I don't understand why I am so upset. Why am I crying?

"I just… I just want to go home," I mumbled to myself. The revelation hit me like a ton of bricks. The feeling of want I have, I want to go home.

I allowed myself to mourn after that. Mourn for my lost family, the person I was, the guy I would have married, the person I could have became. The home I'll never see again.

Two soft knocks on my door snapped me out of myself pity. I quickly unhooked myself from the various machines and got up wiping my face a couple time to rid the tears.

The door opened and a nurse walked in, but I kept my back to her, "Oh miss, what are you doing out of bed!" She asked starting to rush forward.

"I just need to use the restroom," I explained walking quickly into the bathroom, not once looking at her. Once I reached the bathroom I shut the door and locked it behind me before looking around at the large bathroom. I guess it should be large considering it's wheelchair accessible.

Oh great, now I have to pee. How come everytime I enter a bathroom to hide I then have to pee! I do my business and look at myself in the mirror while I wash my hands. My eyes are bloodshot and there are still streaks of tears on my face, my hair is a crumpled, tangled, birds nest. I run the water hot and splash the water on my face a couple times and try to figure brush my hair. It's weird when I look in a mirror. I don't recognize myself, but I know it's me.

Not ready to lay back down I do a quick stretch. Inhaling deeply as I raise my hands above my head and inhale deeply. I raise up onto my tippy toes to get the deep stretch I wanted, flexing all my muscles. A tingly feeling swept over my back and I sighed in relief as I lower my arms and stand back to normal. I look at myself in the mirror and scream in horror as I spring back. Two glorious, white, feathery wings were attached to my back. I flip around to see if they really were there but only catch a glimpse. I keep spinning trying to see it causing the wings to bump into the walls and knock everything off the counter. My heart rate was going crazy and I couldn't breathe despite the many breaths I was taking.

A knock on the door caused me to freeze. "Uh, miss… is everything ok?" I heard the nurse ask timidly. Crap. How do I explain this? Images of being trapped in the hospital even longer flooded my head. Along with being poked and prodded and being asked even more questions I wouldn't be able to explain.

I blinked a few times, squeezing my eyes shut longer than necessary and grab the counter, feeling light headed and dizzy. I took a deep breath before answering with the first thing that came to mind. "Yeah I spilt some water and slipped in it," I then thought off all the times the stupid wings hit the wall and knocked everything off the counter, "and I slipped a few times trying to stand back up. But I'm fine now, thank you," I tell her holding my breath hoping she believes it.

"Oh, ok then, I guess I'll see you when you get out."

I took a deep breath, reliefe flooding me knowing she believed my crap story. Trying to look at… them that way is like a dog trying to catch its it's own tail. Reassuring myself, I crane my neck around and look behind me, covering my mouth to stop from screaming. Ok wings are really there. How do I get rid of them! I can't leave like this! I thought back to what I did that might have caused them to appear.

Maybe if I stretch again they will go away. The minute I raise my clasped hands above my head the wings fold in on themselves and go back into my back. Finally with them gone it was like I could breathe again. I move quickly facing my back to the mirror but looking over my shoulder, there was no evidence of the wings ever being there. Frantically I raise my hospital gown up to look at my back and my stomach drops. The doctors never could explain where the two long scars on the back of my shoulder blades came from. I sigh and take a few deep breaths to ease myself and stop shaking before going back out into my room with a smile on my face.

I recognize this nurse, she comes more often than the others to make sure everything is ok. She is also more nice than the other nurses. What's her name… Nurse Saito! That's right. I smile politely at her as I make my way back to my bed, "I'm sorry for my rudeness earlier, I just really had to use the restroom." I tell her hoping she won't be offended at how I didn't great her when she walked in and will forget the whole bathroom incident.

"Miss! Your shaking! Are you ok!" she exclaims rushing forward to grab my arms.

I brush her off me, not wanting to be touched, and smile confidently, "Yeah, yeah I'm ok, I guess the fall surprised me more than I thought." I tell her. I don't know who I'm trying to convince at the moment, her or myself, but dang, it sounded believable.

I allow Nurse Saito to fuse over me, rushing to put me into bed, telling me I needed some rest, before she finally leaves the room making me promise I'll get some sleep. But I don't sleep. I feel hollow on the inside, and confused, and scared. I can't seem to do anything besides stare at the blank ceiling above me with thoughts plaguing my mind. Who am I?

What am I?

The day rushes by, not much to be said. I avoided talking to people, too afraid of what happened before. Since the incident, the wings have not made a comeback, but who knows when they will show up next.

The door opened and I put up a fake smile again preparing a reason for why I need to be left alone for now. My smile falters seeing it was Detective Ukita. I forgot all about him coming back. I don't have a name picked out! I quickly replace my mask, "Oh, hello Detective," I say greeting him.

Detective Ukita seems to pause, before coming up to my bedside and sitting down. "Hello again, I brought the paperwork that needed to be filled out." He said quietly.

"That's great,"

He opened his mouth but then closed it again. He leaned forward and grabbed my hand, "Listen, I know this is hard, it would be hard for any one. Just because no one has put up a missing person report of you doesn't mean they never will. Don't lose hope," he told me squeezing my hand.

Don't lose hope. How? I've lost everything, and no one seems to care except for him. I gave him a small smile, "Thank you dete-"

"And that's the other thing!" He said cutting me off. He leaned forward grabbing my arms, "It's ok not to be ok. You don't have to put on this show that everything is fine and your happy because its it's not fine, you can cry, you can scream, you can do whatever the hell you want to do and it will be ok! No one will say otherwise. You have been put in a terrible situation and it's going to take a long time before things seem normal, before things are truly ok. You will be ok! I promise. Don't. Lose. Hope." He told me tightening his grip a little.

I sat there with nothing to say. My eyes wide and mouth dropped open. We sat there and stared at each other for a long time. And then everything sped up. I flung my arms around him allowing myself to cry into his shoulder. He wrapped his as arms around me and rocked me back and forth.

I don't know how long I sat there and cried. But when I stopped I wasn't sure if it was because I felt better or because I just ran out of tears to cry. Ukita rubbed my back a few times before I finally sat up a blush covering my face. "I'm sorry about that." I whispered unable to look in his eyes.

"Hey, stop that! It's ok, remember?"

I nodded and for once a real smile crept across my face.

"Now, I know this is probably the last thing you would want to talk about, but I need to know if you have a name picked out?"

I didn't even need to think about it, as a name popped into my head, "Yeah, Hope." I told him blushing again.

"Hey, that's a great name!" Ukita cheered elbowing me in the stomach. "What about a birthday?"

This one was an easy pick, "January 5th," I told him. That was the day I fell.

"Great! Well, Hope, for now you don't have a last name, not until you turn 18 and decide what last name you want, but that's only if we don't find your family! Now I managed to pull some strings and got you placed with this amazing family for your foster home. There names are the Yagami's, the Dad is my police chief." He told me taking my hand again.

I took a deep breathe. I can do this. As long as I don't lose hope. I will overcome this.