Drake and Josh
Episode: 01 (Go-Kart Racing)
The Two Boxes
"You know, sometimes Drake is so dimwitted, I can't tell the difference between him and a monkey!" said Josh.
"An annoying thing 'bout Josh? He over-reacts to EVERYTHING!" said Drake.
"Last week we had to do a project on animal bats, and Drake wasted all the film on my camera taking pictures of baseball bats!" said Josh.
"Last week I brought him lots of well-shot pictures of Trevor's baseball bats, and he starts slappin' me like crazy!" said Drake.
"After we got back our grades, we got a D!" said Josh.
Drake muttered, "And to think, we got D! That's an awesome grade, and Josh says it's too low."
"I hope Drake's finishing his homework," said Josh.
"MEGAN!" screamed Drake, "GIVE YOU FIFTY BUCKS TO DO MY HOMEWORK!"
Introduction
Drake walked into the garage to see Josh working hard on something.
"So, what kind of dork machine are you working on now?" he asked.
"Is a CNG-compatible go-kart that can win this year's go-kart race your idea of a dork machine?" inquired Josh.
"CNG? You mean like Compressed Nectar Gas?" asked Drake.
Josh looked up and corrected, "Compressed natural gas."
Drake sniggered, "Natural gas. Get it, natural gas?
Josh looked blankly at his brother before saying his usual line, "Headaches!"
"So what's the prize?" asked Drake.
"You know the new Yatsubishi Air Hockey Table?" said Josh, "One of those."
"Whoa! Can I be part of your team?" asked Drake.
"Sure," said Josh, "You can drive."
As the duo walked out of the garage, they suddenly broke through the grass covering and stumbled into a pit. As the dust cleared, the two voices were heard, "Megan!"
The Story
Drake and Josh were working on the kart when Megan walked in.
"What's the new boob machine?" she asked, grabbing some Moca Cola from the shelf.
"It's not a boob machine," said Josh, "It's a Go-Kart."
"Hey, I got that Moca Cola first," said Drake.
"Too bad," replied Megan.
"Megan, I demand my-" began Drake when he heard a loud "What the-!" from behind.
"Drake!" screamed Josh, "Dude, you placed nails on the kart?"
"You told me to," said Drake.
"By nails, I meant pins, not toenails! And where'd you get them from anyways?" asked Josh.
"A hobo," said Drake, "I traded it for your signed photograph of Oprah."
"You what!"
And with that, Megan was the audience of a struggle between the two brothers, and suddenly realized, "This is my chance." She then proceeded to pour the Moca Cola into the engine.
When the heated battle was over, Drake and Josh resumed to make the Go-Kart. Suddenly, the engine began to whirr. Drake peeked in and then, a spurt of Moca Cola struck his face.
"Megan!"
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Drake and Josh carried their new-bought equipment towards the garage, talking.
"So, a rhinoceros is chasing you, what do you do?" asked Josh.
"Give him twenty to leave me alone for the day, thirty to leave me forever and fifty to chase Megan instead," said Drake.
Drake and Josh walked into the garage and Drake dropped all of his stuff on Josh's foot.
"OWWW!" howled Josh in pain, "Dude, you know my foot is my weak point!"
"Whoa, man, take it easy," said Drake, "we should get building."
"Right," said Josh. As he walked forward, he tripped over a wooden plank and fell on Drake right over the table. The two landed in a heap behind their work-table.
"Uh, Drake," said Josh, "I think there's a HOBO NAIL IN MY PANTS!"
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The next day….
"We done good, brother," said Josh, "High five!"
Drake slapped his brother's hand a bit too hard, and Josh screamed "DRAKE!"
The two brothers examined their Go-Kart with pride.
"We got enough gas?" asked Josh.
"Yep, enough natural gas," sniggered Drake.
"Enough oil?" asked Josh.
"Yep," said Drake, "I filled it up this morning."
"Good," said Josh, "Tomorrow, we dominate that contest!"
"Natural gas," laughed Drake. Josh slapped him.
At the track, Drake and Josh hopped into the kart. Drake started up the car as the green signal flashed. All of the cars raced off into the track, all except Drake and Josh's.
"What's going on?" asked Josh.
"Dunno," said Drake.
Josh peered over at the back of the kart.
"Drake," said Josh, turning around, "When I asked you to fill up the kart with oil, where did you get it from?"
"The kitchen," said Drake, "Why do you ask?"
"Drake, you put COOKING OIL IN THE KART!" exclaimed Josh.
"Wait, they use oil to cook now?" asked Drake.
Josh looked at his brother blankly before pouncing at him and knocking him off the kart. Walter, Audrey and Megan rushed down from the stands to check out the problem.
"What's wrong?" asked Walter.
"Drake put cooking oil in the kart!" exclaimed Josh.
"Yeah, like I even know there are nultiple types of oil," said Drake.
"Multiple!" corrected Josh.
"First you blow the Plasma screen and now you blow the Air Hockey table," said Megan, "Yatsubishi must really hate you."
"AND THE WINNERS CROSS THE FINISH LINE!"
Drake and Josh looked up to see Eric raise the trophy with Creg standing beside him.
"Good thing we made a CNG-powered kart," said Eric.
"Natural gas," sniggered Drake.
Josh immediately pounced on him and the duo fell into fists of fury.
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Drake and Josh stared at their kart.
"We lost," said Josh.
"We lost the Air Hockey table," said Drake.
Drake walked up to the kart and opened up the engine. Immediately, a spurt of liquid dog poop hit Drake's face. He rubbed his hand over his face, and then put the poop on Josh's face.
"Three guesses to where the poop came from," said Josh.
"Megan!" said Drake.