Cuddy: *I call house into my office* Why are you on the surgery list?
House: Because my patient needs surgery. Duh.
Cuddy: Then why are YOU on the surgery list not your patient?
House: Doctors get faster treatment.
Cuddy: *I roll my eyes* You are an idiot.
House: Why? Were you worried that I needed a surgery? *I smirk at you*
Cuddy: *I roll my eyes* No. I was worried that someone who needed one more was being pushed down the list because you're an impatient ass.
House: Then why did you drop it when I said it was my patient that needed the surgery.
Cuddy: I didn't. You just didn't give me a chance to finish.
House: No. You dropped it.
Cuddy: Why does your patient need surgery?
House: Because she's sick.
Cuddy: *I roll my eyes* What does she have that requires surgery.
House: A leg infarction.
Cuddy: You're an ass. *I frown at you*
House: But you're still worried about me. *I'm smirking*
Cuddy: No, I'm not. *I frown at you*
House: You wouldn't have called me down here if I had a different name on there.
Cuddy: *I roll my eyes* Yeah because a patient name makes sense! A doctors name doesn't.
House: My name has been on the list before.
Cuddy: *I frown and look down*
House: See? Still worried.
Cuddy: *I roll my eyes* Not worried.
House: Guilty?
Cuddy: *I roll my eyes again* Go do your job. You owe me clinic hours!
House: Didn't deny it.
Cuddy: *I sigh* Not guilty. Now go do your job.
House: Then you like me.
Cuddy: *I laugh* That's funny.
House: Really? *I kiss you*
Cuddy: *I push you away surprised you actually did it* House!
House: *I smirk* You wanted to kiss me back.
Cuddy: Then I would've. Go do your job. *I frown at you* And DON'T try to kiss me again.
House: Try? *I smirk* I did. And If I didn't say anything first you so would have kissed me back.
Cuddy: No I wouldn't have. You like me, I don't like you.
House: I do like you.
Cuddy: *I look at you shocked and don't respond*
House: *I frown* Fine.
Cuddy: Are you serious? *I look at my lap*
House: *I look at you* Is your self esteem really that low?
Cuddy: *I roll my eyes* No, I just always thought it was a joke when we accused each other of liking the other.
House: *I frown* It wasn't a joke to me.
Cuddy: Then why did you always deny it? *I frown* Idiot.
House: Because it's stupid. Do you like me?
Cuddy: Yes.
House: Then why did you deny it?
Cuddy: Because you did. Idiot! *I frown at you*
House: *I kiss you again*
Cuddy: *I kiss you back*
House: *I smile*
Cuddy: *I smile back*
House: Go out with me?
Cuddy: Where?
House: No I mean be my girlfriend.
Cuddy: *I smile* Ok. Have dinner with me tonight?
House: *I nod* Where?
Cuddy: My house.
House: Your house?
Cuddy: Yeah. Still have to go do your job.
House: Damn. Fine. *I go back to my office*
Cuddy: Clinic duty House!
House: Aw come on!
Cuddy: House! Clinic!
House: Fine.
Cuddy: *I smile* Thank you.
House: *I roll my eyes and do my clinic duty*
Cuddy: *I do my work smiling*
House: *At the end of the day I go to your office*
Cuddy: *I smile at you*
House: *I smile back* We're going to your house?
Cuddy: Yes. I'm making dinner.
House: Ok. Meet you there.
Cuddy: Ok. *I drive home and let us in*
House: What are you making?
Cuddy: *I shrug* Didn't think about it.
House: Oh. Well we don't have to eat dinner.
Cuddy: *I roll my eyes* I'm not sleeping with you tonight.
House: Why not?
Cuddy: It's the first date! I don't have sex on the first date.
House: Since when?
Cuddy: Since always.
House: Oh really? Remember when you had that date with I don't know his name?
Cuddy: *I shrug* I had no intention of seeing him again. *I look in the fridge* What do you want for dinner?
House: *I laugh* Just because it was the last date didn't make it the first!
Cuddy: I don't have to face them after if we didn't have a second date.
House: *I laugh* Well there was that night in college.
Cuddy: *I blush and look down* I didn't know that I'd see you again back then.
House: Well has it made our lives awkward?
Cuddy: I avoided you for months!
House: You sucked at it.
Cuddy: *I roll my eyes* I don't want sex tonight.
House: Why not? *I kiss you and push you against the counter*
Cuddy: *I push you away* House I said no!
House: *I frown* Fine.
Cuddy: What do you want for dinner? *I go back to the cabinet and look for something* I could make pasta for dinner?
House: Ok. *I kiss you*
Cuddy: *I kiss you back*
House: *I pull you closer with a hand on your ass*
Cuddy: *I push you away* House! I told you I didn't want to have sex! Don't push me. It won't end well.
House: *I roll my eyes* Why, what'll happen?
Cuddy: *I glower at you* Just don't.
House: Why not?
Cuddy: Because I don't want to have sex right now.
House: But maybe later?
Cuddy: Maybe. Do you want pasta or not?
House: Sure. *I sit down*
Cuddy: *I make dinner and give you a plate*
House: *I eat it* Thanks.
Cuddy: *I nod eating as well*
House: So…
Cuddy: Yeah?
House: I don't know. *I laugh* You have sauce on your nose.
Cuddy: *I blush and wipe off my nose*
House: *I smile* You look cute.
Cuddy: *I blush and look down* Thank you.
House: You know you look better the older you get?
Cuddy: You saying I was ugly in college?
House: No! You were sexy back then. You're even more sexy now.
Cuddy: *I suppress a smile* You're just trying to get laid.
House: *I smile* Is it working?
Cuddy: No. Stop that.
House: Why?
Cuddy: I don't want to have sex on the first date.
House: Why?
Cuddy: Because you're an ass and I don't want to get hurt.
House: What? How do those reasons have anything to do with sex?
Cuddy: *I roll my eyes* You know how that has to do with sex.
House: Explain it to me anyways.
Cuddy: You're an ass so there's a chance you'd tell people things I don't want people to know. And that would hurt me.
House: Well I won't tell anyone. And what would you not want people to know anyways?
Cuddy: *I roll my eyes* Nothing. Everything. I don't want people to know when I'm having sex.
House: Why not?
Cuddy: Because It's not anyones my business but ours if we are having sex and when.
House: Well I won't tell anyone.
Cuddy: That we aren't having sex tonight? I didn't think you would.
House: *I smirk* Maybe.
Cuddy: *I roll my eyes* I'm not having sex with you tonight.
House: With me?
Cuddy: *I shrug* We aren't exclusive. It's the first date.
House: But…
Cuddy: What?
House: I want to be exclusive.
Cuddy: *I smile* Yeah? What if I don't?
House: You don't? Why not?
Cuddy: I'm not bad looking, and I like sex. If someone cute asked me out I might say yes.
House: You like sex, but you won't have it with me?
Cuddy: I have before.
House: *I roll my eyes* Decades ago!
Cuddy: Was it not sex because it was a long time ago?
House: No but it is less relevant to our current relationship and I want to be exclusive.
Cuddy: Why? You like sex as much or more than I do.
House: But you don't have to pay guys to have sex with you.
Cuddy: *I laugh and kiss your cheek* Girls are more picky and you're good looking but you're an ass.
House: *I roll my eyes* Can we please be exclusive?
Cuddy: We'll talk about it when we've dated longer.
House: So it wouldn't bother you if I went out and got laid tonight?
Cuddy: It'd obviously bother you if I did. *I laugh* We can be exclusive. If I had sex tonight it'd be with myself. By myself.
House: *I sigh* But not with me.
Cuddy: No sex on the first date.
House: We weren't even dating our first time!
Cuddy: That was in college. And that was not your first time! Was it?
House: No. I lost my virginity at 14. You?
Cuddy: *I blush and don't respond*
House: Well?
Cuddy: I… uh… you were my first. *I'm blushing like crazy and looking down*
House: *I try to withhold a laugh* At 20 something?
Cuddy: *I blush* I was a good girl growing up. Never had sex, never did drugs, drank. Top grades.
House: *I smirk* What changed?
Cuddy: Not a virgin, been drunk, been high, once.
House: Really? When? On what?
Cuddy: *I sigh* Marijuana. In college. Which led to sex. With you.
House: You were high?!
Cuddy: Yeah. Shut up.
House: How high? Do you remember what happened?
Cuddy: Sex. I don't remember much more. *I'm clearly lying*
House: Cuddy?
Cuddy: *I look down* It wasn't very good sex.
House: I thought it was…
Cuddy: I know.
House: Is that why you didn't want to have sex?
Cuddy: *I look down*
House: Oh. Well it's been like 20 years… Maybe I'm better now. *I look down a little offended*
Cuddy: *I frown* House… I didn't say it because I wanted you to feel bad. I didn't even want to say it!
House: I know. But still.
Cuddy: *I kiss your cheek* You could be better. I don't know. And honestly, tonight I don't care. I don't want to have sex with anyone.
House: Except yourself.
Cuddy: *I roll my eyes* Doesn't count.
House: *I laugh and get up and put my plate in the sink*
Cuddy: *I put mine in the sink as well and go to the living room*
House: *I follow you*
Cuddy: *I kiss you*
House: *I kiss you back*
Cuddy: *I push you onto the couch still kissing you*
House: *I keep kissing you*
Cuddy: *I straddle you kissing you*
House: *I have my hands on your hips and pull up your shirt a little*
Cuddy: *I pull it back down*
House: *I pull it back up again*
Cuddy: *I pull away and get up* House! I don't want to have sex! Don't! *I fix my shirt*
House: *I look down* Sorry.
Cuddy: *I look at the time* It's late. I'm tired.
House: *I smirk* You're not very good at kicking people out politely.
Cuddy: *I roll my eyes* I told you I didn't want to have sex. And you tried afterwards.
House: You sat on my lap!
Cuddy: I like kissing. A lot. *I open the door* Goodbye House. See you at work tomorrow.
House: Can I see you again soon?
Cuddy: You see me every day.
House: *I roll my eyes* I mean on a date. Or having sex. Or both.
Cuddy: We'll talk about it later. Go home House.
House: *I kiss you* See you later.
Cuddy: *I kiss you back* See you. *I close the door as you walk away*
House: *I go home*
Cuddy: *I go to my room and go to bed*
House: *I bring you a coffee in the morning*
Cuddy: *I look at you* What's in this?
House: Cream and sugar.
Cuddy: And?
House: Coffee.
Cuddy: And?
House: And cup paper? What do you think is in there?
Cuddy: I don't know. Ketamine? GHB? Ecstasy?
House: *I roll my eyes* Why would I do that?
Cuddy: Because you're desperate, and have a history with drugging people.
House: Name 2.
Cuddy: Wilson and yourself.
House: I don't count.
Cuddy: Vicodin, cocaine, acid, heroin, morphine, should I go on? *I have my hands on my hips obviously disapproving.
House: I didn't drug the coffee.
Cuddy: Are you sure?
House: Yes. *I hand you the coffee*
Cuddy: Thanks. *I put the coffee down*
House: *I roll my eyes* Fine, don't drink it.
Cuddy: *I take a sip* Happy?
House: Does it taste like ketamine?
Cuddy: No. *I kiss your cheek* Thank you.
House: *I smile*
Cuddy: Do your job.