Rin sat in her room staring at a picture of her and Sesshomaru when they were a couple. They had been a couple since the 8th grade all the way up through graduation and halfway through college until he decided to drop out and pursue music. Rin could never forget that day even if her very soul depended on it.
I'm so glad you made time to see me
How's life? Tell me how's the family?
I haven't seen them in a while
You've been good busier than ever
We small talk, work and the weather
Your guard is up and I know why
Because the last time you saw me
Is still burned in the back of your mind
You gave me roses and I left them there to die
Rin had last seen him when he dropped off roses for her, that was before he told her he thought they would be better apart than together, he wanted to travel and she would only be in his way. Rin would not give him the satisfaction of seeing her cry so she merely stood in silence and waited for him to leave, she then set the roses aside and let them wither and die before returning them to Sesshomaru with a note saying the roses are what are left of her love for him, nothing but death. Sesshomaru left the town a few days later.
So this is me swallowing my pride
Standing in front of you saying Sorry for that night
And I go back to December all the time
It turns out freedom means nothing but missing you
Wishing I'd realized what I had when you were mine
I'd go back to December turn around and make it all right
I'd go back to December all the time
These days I haven't been sleeping
Staying up playing back myself leaving
When your birthday passed and I didn't call
And I think about summer and all the beautiful times
I watched you laughing from the passenger side
Realized I loved you in the fall
And then the cold came, the dark days when fear crept into my mind
You gave me all your love and all I gave you was goodbye
Rin remembered that when his birthday showed up and he tried calling her, she ignored the call and never returned it, nor had she texted him. She made him feel as if he was dropped from her life with such ease, and she hated where that left her now.
So this is me swallowing my pride
Standing in front of you saying Sorry for that night
And I go back to December all the time
It turns out freedom means nothing but missing you
Wishing I'd realized what I had when you were mine
I'd go back to December turn around and make it all right
I'd go back to December all the time
I miss your tanned skin, your sweet smile
So good to me so right
And how you held me in your arms that September night
The first time you ever saw me cry
Maybe this is wishful thinking
Probably mindless dreaming
But if we loved again I swear I'd love you right
I'd go back in time and change it, but I can't
So if the chain is on your door I understand
But this is me swallowing my pride
Standing in front of you saying Sorry for that night
And I go back to December all the time…
It turns out freedom means nothing but missing you
Wishing I'd realized what I had when you were mine
I'd go back to December turn around and make it all right
I'd go back to December, turn around and change my own mind
I go back to December all the time
All the time
Rin closed the book of the photo album with her and Sesshomaru's happy pictures, She missed him and she couldn't change that fact, but she could become something to show him she would not have been a burden to him. She set off to become something to make herself worthy.
Several Months Later
Sesshomaru had been watching the news for upcoming artists, and one caught his eye, he didn't know why just that he loved her voice. He believed he knew her but he did not know where, the voice reminded him of Rin and he wondered how she was doing. He tried calling her again and was met only with her voicemail, he gave up trying a while ago but left her number in his phone.
I told myself today was going to be the day
No more excuses cuz I knew exactly what to say
Was gonna make my play but just like yesterday
My mind erased and I let the moment slip away
Another night got me sitting here all on my own
Picking up the phone
But I can't get passed the dial tone
Racking my brain
Going insane
Again and again
I can't keep going this way
Crushed
By the sweetest lips I've never kissed
And your fingertips and the warmest touch that I've always missed
Crushed
By the softest hands I've never held
Probably never tell
You're the strongest love that I've ever felt
Crushed
That I haven't ever let you know
How it always goes
Cuz I lose my nerve whenever you get close
And so I'm left
Short of breath
With that heavy feeling in my chest
Baby I'm so crushed
Sesshomaru's eyes widened as he saw a small opening of her face and knew who she was, he smiled, so his Rin wished to pursue music to equal him did she? He would have to set something up to get them both in the same place so she couldn't run any longer. He set about making the one call he would need.
So I told myself Tomorrow's going to be the day
And I keep on telling myself that I'm gonna find a way
And I won't be afraid just like yesterday
Won't walk away never gonna let another chance slip away
Cuz I gotta know whichever way it's gonna go
Rest my heart and soul
Cuz there can never be no more
Racking my brain
Going insane
Again and again
I won't keep going this way
Crushed
By the sweetest lips I've never kissed
And your fingertips and the warmest touch that I've always missed
Crushed
By the softest hands I've never held
Probably never tell
You're the strongest love that I've ever felt
Crushed
That I haven't ever let you know
How it always goes
Cuz I lose my nerve whenever you get close
And so I'm left
Short of breath
With that heavy feeling in my chest
Baby I'm so crushed
Crushing I'm so into you, don't know what I'm going to do
Gotta find a way to you, and I wanna stress that I always missed
Crushed
Crushing I'm so into you, don't know what I'm gonna do
Gotta find a way to you, strongest love that I've ever felt
Crushed
Crushing I'm so into you, don't know what I'm gonna do
Gotta find a way to you
And so I'm left short of breath
With that heavy feeling in my chest
Baby I'm so
Crushed
As he watched her dance on the stage back home he was entranced by her movements, she had chosen dance to pick up the pieces of her shattered heart to move on, that would explain why he had been unable to reach her. He hung up the phone with a smile, that was his half-brother Imuyasha with news that Rin was scheduled to open for New Divide in a month, under the name Deidre. Sesshomaru looked up the name and was shocked to find the name meant broken, the name's origins stem from a woman named Deidre who died of a broken heart.
He and the band packed up and headed back for home to get ready for the concert, however for Sesshomaru, it held a much deeper yet vital plan to getting her back. He realized he should never have left her the way he did but he was prepared to make up for it, if she would allow it.