Fear of The L Word
I own nothing but plot and dialogue.
Most characters are owned by Stephen Spielberg and Warner Brothers Studio.
Made up locations are also owned by Stephen Spielberg and W.B. Studios.
A/N: I've written this story for two reasons, to manage through a rather long course of boredom, and to finally post a story on one of my favorite animated shows.
Summary: Consider this set where Buster and Babs only hook up in the show, rather then in real life, or toon life, which ever makes more sense. Babs tells Buster of her feelings towards him, but when Buster doesn't reply, she assumes it's because he doesn't feel the same way. Buster, unable to voice his emotions due to a horrible course of luck in the past, tries to find a way to confess his love without saying the actual words. Complete with drama, angst, sadness, more drama, slightly more angst, and a cliché scene in the rain.
Anyone still reading?
He sighed, pressing his head against the brick wall, hoping he could just skip the entire process and have the object in his gloved hands. How did this even start, two days ago was it? Starting out like a normal enough day (normal for Acme Acres, that is) another walk to school with his closest friend, Barbara Ann "Babs" Bunny, impressionist, comedian, actress extraordinaire. If only he told her those a few days ago, probably could've avoided all this horror; but there's no changing what's already happened. All he could do was suck it up and find another job, get one step closer to the jewel, and closer to the girl of his dreams.
"I, Buster Bunny, am the biggest idiot in the world!" He shouted, shoving his hands into the pockets on his red shirt before marching off in another attempt to make money.
Two Days Earlier:
Why'd she have to do this? Why'd she have to suck away all the humor, all the comfort out of the situation? Why couldn't it be another "ordinary" day in Acme Acres, another walk to school, attend classes for eight hours then walk home and expect some adventure to pop up in one form or another? No, not every day could be wacky and fun, some had to be awkward and complicated; today had to be one of those days.
Not two minutes ago had he and Babs practiced a new routine to do as a project for sixth period, one line leads to another then, before he knew it, their kissing passionately (as the script required). After a prolonged (and enjoyable) kiss, they continued walking to school. Babs kept quiet the entire time after the kiss, meaning Buster had a conversation between himself and anybody who walked by them, it consisted of gibberish and mumbling under his breath. She eventually broke the silence, but it didn't make things any easier.
"I love you." That's what the fourteen year old, pink bunny with the yellow shirt, purple skirt, and pink bows had said as they walked through the forest, looking at him with those gorgeous blue (actually brown) eyes, interrupting his precious little babble. Did she expect him to say it back? Of course she did! Could he? Maybe not! He loved her, more than a sister, more than a friend, more than anything, but he didn't like saying the L word out loud, usually it ended with someone going far away for a very long time, having no idea who his father was, his mom only calling him once a week to tell him how things were going, he had a perfectly good reason to be cynical.
He opened his mouth, hoping that something might happen to break the silence and awkwardness of the situation, maybe a Grey Hound could run him over (and he was talking about the bus!) "Buster?" Babs asked, wondering why Buster had remained silent, his mouth hanging open for no apparent reason. His mouth had went dry, feeling like it could suck the rest of him dry and have him crumble away, he even considered it for a comedic excuse to break the silence, but that wouldn't help. Why couldn't he just form the damn words and embrace her with a hug and a kiss, but some instinct told him to keep his mouth shut and hope school was within reach.
"Awkward, huh?" She said sheepishly. "I'm sorry." She looked down and watched as her feet shuffled against the dirt, avoiding eye contact with the blue rabbit. "I should've kept it to myself." He had never seen her so disappointed, so embarrassed and humiliated. They turned the corner, where Acme Looniversity stood in all its wacky glory, the sun reflecting off the clock tower, toons entering the building with backpacks slung over shoulders, or hanging in the court yard talking with friends and performing weird antics that defied the laws of human physics.
"Like, mondo bad vibes." Shirley said as she approached the two hares, holding a binder against her chest that had some weird hieroglyphic like marks on it. Standing beside her was Plucky Duck, wearing his usual white tank top, though it was hard to notice with the mountain of text books in his hands covering his entire upper half, no doubt carrying them for Shirley.
"Don't need psychic powers to know that one." Plucky said. "It's written on their face." Buster wondered how Plucky could know that when he couldn't even see two feet in front of himself. He wanted to tell Plucky to mind his own business, but was interrupted by the morning bell, ringing out across the yard; chiming, letting students know they had five minutes before they were tardy.
"Like, shouldn't we be heading to class or some junk?" Shirley asked in her not so regular tone.
"Yeah, we should," Babs said, forcing a smile to Buster. "I'll see you at lunch?" She asked him.
He nodded and quickly walked into the school, keeping his head low and his ears lower, walking past rooms with various antics going on and on, normally he'd stop and admire Bugs Bunny's pre-class warm ups, but didn't bother with a second glance. The hall was mostly empty, two minutes before first period, most kids already made it inside classrooms; seated peacefully in their chairs or socializing with friends and enemies alike.
If he didn't pick up his pace and dash through the hallway, he'd be late, get his third tardy, and be sent to the principal's office, but he didn't care, not for the moment anyway. What to do about Babs, he messed up earlier, how could he make it up to her without saying those horrible words that made people disappear, something nice and extravagant, jewelry maybe?
That was it! Jewelry! It couldn't be easier, grab a card, write "I Love you too" on it. A ring or necklace would definitely say those four little words without requiring him to speak them, now all he needed to do was find a store that sold jewelry, find the money to buy the jewelry from the store, find the job to get the money to buy the jewelry from the store, and decide on what to get her, maybe he could tackle world hunger while he was at it cause things couldn't get any harder.
On the other side of Acme Loo sat Babs Bunny, crossing things out with her black marker in the back pages of her notebook. Shirley sat directly in front of her, her usual reading material (secrets of the mystic and similar stories) resting comfortably in her hands.
The bell rang, signaling that anyone not in the class was now tardy and would be sent to the principal's office. Shirley slammed her book and placed it under her desk, turning around and looking into the rabbit's notebook. "Babs Bunny?" Shirley asked, reading all the weird ways she had written it, different fonts and what not, and the way she was crossing them out aggressively.
Babs immediately slammed the notebook shut, pressing as much of her upper body as she could on top of it. "It's nothing Shirley!" She shouted, slamming her head onto the desk.
"Whoa, mondo reaction to nothing. Writing your name isn't such a big deal or some junk." She said before turning around and opening her own notebook.
"Unless…" Mary Melody, one of few human toons to attend Acme Looniversity, said, turning to her left to face the pink rabbit, "it's someone else's last name." Melody hinted, smiling deviously.
Shirley didn't bother turning around, though her head lifted slightly, indicating that she had to think about whom else had the same last name as Babs. Mary found this humorous considering Shirley had those mystical powers of insight, yet when it came to love; she could be as clueless as Plucky.
"So you love him now?" Mary asked.
"I always loved him, it's just now I'm dealing with it." Babs replied, reopening her books and continuing her reign of black scribbling out on the names. "And the consequences that come with it."
"If you love him so much, then like, why are you crossing those out?" Shirley asked.
"Long story short, we kissed before school, I told him I loved him, he didn't say anything back." Both Mary and Shirley cringe in shock from this information. "I should have a sign that reads loser above my head." The lights in class dimmed and a bright green light shined in front of Babs.
She looked up to see the word 'Loser' flashing repeatedly in green, yellow, and red. Calamity stood beside her, holding it up with pride. "That's not helping Calamity." Babs moaned. He dropped the sign in disappointment as the lights came back on and started to walk away, dragging his feet and slouching. It gave Babs a sense of guilt for yelling at the young coyote. "The lights were a nice touch though!" She said to comfort him.
Thank you read the picket sign as Calamity held it up, his sense of pride returning.
"Now where were we?" Babs asked, turning back to her friends. "Oh yeah, the destruction of my friendship with Buster."
"Give Buster some time, I'm sure he just wants to find the right words to tell you." Mary suggested.
"Yeah, and like, doesn't he only see his parents once a week. It's not easy to express things when you practically raise yourself." Shirley added, Melody nodding in agreement.
They had no idea how right they were, especially about raising himself, which he'd been doing since the age of eight. Babs told them that Buster's parents were always traveling because their jobs required them to be on the move twenty four hours, six days a week as a cover to buster's actual story, as he trusted babs enough to tell her the truth, how his mom was never home, always in some different part of the world, and that he was a bastard child who's dad ran off before Buster was even born.
There was a single bright side to this though, every night she would walk the few feet over to Buster's house with some of her mom's cooking in plastic containers, they'd play video games, watch television, work on comedy routines, talk, all on the excuse that she had brought some food to share with him. "Miss Bunny, would you like to join us?" Asked Professor Fudd, snapping the young girl out of her fond memories. Normally Babs would insult, mock, humiliate, impersonate, or anything else that would make her fellow students laugh at the bald man, but she wasn't in the mood for any of that today.
"Sorry Professor Fudd." She said shyly, looking around the sea of faces for reactions, some were disappointed, others were shocked, and some were both.
"That's bettew, now class we awe going to study the fouwteenth toonmendent, open youw books to page fouwty two and let's begin." He said with a sense of pride, thanks to Bab's easy defeat.
Babs sighed, not only had Buster stolen her pep, he had also stolen her sense of humor. That rabbit would pay for it at lunch, unless he had a good response to what she had said earlier, in which case he'd be rewarded with a kiss and hug, and maybe just one mallet to the head.
Buster sat outside Principal Bug's office, waiting for the comedic hare to bring him in and talk over the third tardy in the week. Well, at least it gave him some time to plan his apology to Babs.
Now, considering a classy diamond necklace was between the prices of five thousand and ten thousand, he could tap into the money in his bank account that his mom had started a few years ago; she'd send him two hundred dollars a week for food and other necessities, though he'd usually spend it on games and books, as well as movies and other expensive objects of interest.
He'd walk to the bank after school and check the balance, then he'd find a high paying job and earn however much he needed, and finally he'd find a jewelry store and look over the different styles of rings and necklaces; maybe he could get it engraved if he had enough money left.
Then came Babs herself, they had spent so much time together that she could see through any lie of his. Avoiding her would be basically impossible; his schedule consisted mostly of her, eating breakfast with her, walking to school with her, eating lunch with her, walking home with her, eating dinner with her, they were practically a couple, but without the kissing.
Plucky and Hampton had Shirley and Fifi now, going on dates, leaving him and Babs in the dust. No calling on them to help keep Babs at bay for awhile. He could leave his home an hour earlier for school, claiming he had a big project coming up, and that would also give him an excuse to stay late, now what about lunch and dinner.
"Principal Bugs will see you now." Granny said as a young moose walked out of Bug's office, muttering something under his breath. Buster stood, still thinking of possible ways to avoid the precious pink bunny.
"Uh, what's up doc?" The tall, grey rabbit munching on the carrot asked, leaning back in his chair, his feet resting comfortably on his desk. The place had a nice touch to it without the flaming torches and mystical head ala Wizard of Oz. That didn't mean the fear of being sent there was gone though.
"Not much Bugs." Buster replied, taking his seat in front of the desk.
"Actually, that's where you're wrong Buster. What's up is you've been late for one too many classes this quarter." Bugs stopped to chew off a little more of his carrot, hoping to add a little dramatic effect to the conversation. "Now I don't like being the bad guy, it never ends well for them, but I'm forced by the school to punish you in some manner. So, after a lot of thinking, I've come to a decision. You may not like me for it, but I have no choice."
He was having trouble paying attention to Bugs, still questioning how he could avoid Babs for lunch.
"I know how much you like conversing with Miss Barbara at lunch…"
Babs, what's she got to do with this? Buster questioned to himself, it was times like these he wished he signed up for comedic coincidence class.
"But for the next week you will have restricted lunch, meaning you will eat in a small room with a teacher watching you constantly. Now I know you may be mad but-"
"Oh, thank you, thank you, and thank you!" Buster shouted, practically jumping over his desk to hug the grey hare, but he settled on shaking his hand, glove to glove, before walking to the door and leaving, passing the next kid who would be meeting with the principal.
Bugs scratched the back of his head, shrugging. "Kids, go figure."
Buster held the blue note with pride as he walked into the hallway, the bell rang, signaling second period was about to begin. Of course the smile disappeared as his thoughts returned to him, he still had the daily dinner, and sixth period "Comedy Partners" class with her, obviously enough they were partners in the class, in fact that was the class that had started all this, well, probably not all of it, just the kiss that brought her feelings out in the open.
What to do about dinner? He could pretend he caught some cold, or he could stay at someone else's house for dinner, maybe Hampton, though Plucky did say spending time with Hampton's family deserved a special circle in hell; on second thought, maybe he'd just roam around town for two hours.
Now sixth period, that's where things would get messy, he had already devised the plan but that didn't make it any easier, Babs might even start to hate him afterwards. Ironic really, that one of the steps involved in getting closer to her was going to get her angry.
"Switched partners!" Babs shouted at the poor soul who had delivered her the news.
"Y-Yesss." Sylvester uttered, scared of the girl. "Misster Bunny hass requessted a change with partnerss."
Babs was holding an umbrella covered in saliva by the time he had finished explaining. "So who am I working with now?" She asked, stifling her sadness to be let loose as rage later on.
"You will be working with Plucky Duck for the next week; we'll talk about a more permanent partner on Monday." He said as the green mallard appeared beside her.
"Just so you know, I don't do sidekick, and there is no chance you're getting more screen time then I am."
"Whatever Plucky," She sighed, looking around the room for her old partner.
"Good, now if you don't mind I need to practice the fine art of . . ." Plucky pulled a pair of nunchucks from behind his back and started swinging them rapidly around his body, "Nunchuckery!" Babs, knowing how the situation would go, took a large step back, as did many of the other students.
All were surprised when he finished the performance without a single scratch on him, he bowed as one or two students clapped, everyone returned to what they had been doing while Plucky smiled his egotistical smile.
"Wow Plucky, that was actually pretty cool." Babs complimented with a weak smile.
"And I've never had a lesson." He said, closing his eyes and hoping that when he opened them people would be kissing his webbed feet.
In an instant, the weapon combusted, engulfing both themselves and the mallard in flames. "Why's it always gotta happen to the bird?" Plucky asked as he crumbled into ashes and a pair of eyes.
"Believe me Plucky, I'd trade my pain for yours if I could."
"I think I have heartburn," Plucky stated as he returned to his normal green feathered self.
"Better then heart break," She stated solemnly.
"What's with the mood killer, ol' blue ears gotcha down?" He asked with what sounded like concern.
She pushed away all thoughts of denial, "Yeah."
"Ah, sadly I am not familiar with the word no, as I always get what I want."
"'Not familiar with the word no.'" She mocked. "Remember the time you were nominated for an Emmy?" She asked.
"Yes, and it was unfairly taken from me by that smug man!" He shouted.
"Not this again, Plucky we both know Tony Shalhoub deserved that Emmy."
"So he plays a detective for eight seasons, big deal."
"This is the reason you can't go within two hundred feet of him, listen Plucky can we just get back to our project." She said, unsuccessfully trying to keep Plucky from making any more of a scene.
"You will rue that day Monk!" He said before pulling out another pair of nunchucks.
"Why me?" She questioned.
Buster watched from across the room as Plucky played with his weapons. "Great, I ditch Babs and Plucky's going into his Shalhoub rant." Buster sighed and turned to his new partner.
"Better than his William Dafoe speech," Hampton replied. "And his Michael C. Hall lecture."
"Strangely that doesn't take any of my guilt away." Buster explained rolling his eyes. "So what were you and Master Duck doing for your routine?" He asked as Plucky had accidentally hit himself.
"I smile and he demonstrates how to kill a pig using nunchucks."
"Yeah, the only person he could kill with those things is himself, but just to be safe I'm going to trade back partners before our projects are due." He said, glancing at Babs every ten seconds, unaware that she was doing the same thing until their eyes awkwardly met. He smiled, she turned, and it was all very sad and very depressing.
"Wonder where he keeps all those nunchucks?" Hampton asked, watching Plucky get struck by lightning from a hole in the roof.
He struggled through the last period, knowing that his closest friend absolutely despised him only allowed time to move slower, and once he could swear the minute hand had moved back ten minutes.
After what seemed like another hour, the bell had finally rung, signaling that Wednesday was over and the students could go home for the day. Almost all the toons busted through the doors; only a handful remaining, Buster being in said handful.
He watched from a second floor window as Babs walked out the front door, sluggishly trekking down the stairs and around a corner, disappearing from his view. The only thing that kept him from running after her was the thought that she could easily be taken from him if he said the 'L' word.
Regardless, he was determined to get her affection back; no matter how long it would take him, nor how much. He waited another ten minutes before vacating the school and heading into the city, opposite the forest. First to the bank, then a jewelers; he was certain he'd have enough money to buy her a respectable necklace, maybe he'd be able to get some romantic environment set up, a restaurant or beach, anything that could set the mood.
He'd have Babs' heart in no time.
Present Day:
Two days ago, had it only been that long? It was starting to feel like years really, since he had vowed to get her something that said those words he himself was afraid to say aloud. "You get back with those!" Shouted his boss - well former boss - as he ran out the door and dashed through the street traffic. He doubted some stolen condiment packages were going to say those things for him, but he felt like leaving a good impression with his co-workers; god he didn't even like ketchup but it was the closest thing he could grab before jumping over the register and running.
Eight jobs, and not one person who enjoyed his wonderful personality; hadn't these people ever seen a comic master before? Evidently not, otherwise they'd just hand him the damn necklace, with its shining emerald core piece and circling diamonds on the extravagant gold chain. He was really starting to scare himself. All the jobs he's had from a chemical tester, a crash test dummy, a stunt double for the Easter Bunny in his new Hollywood action thriller, and recently a fast food employee, but nothing was working out.
After running six blocks, he stopped, knowing his obese boss wasn't willing to chase him for six mere ketchup packets that Buster would throw away the first second he could. Why couldn't this be one of those romantic clichés where things would just fall into place and they would kiss at the end, or he'd have a dramatic death scene; the former being preferred. He marched down the street and looked through more help wanted signs, passing the bank as he went. "Six thousand seven hundred and forty two dollars, only another two hundred to go." The rabbit muttered, wondering which was worse, getting another job or jumping in front of a car and suing the driver.
Being hit by a car was starting to sound better and better.
He took a single deep breath and calmed himself, knowing it would be another long day; all he could do was hope that his girl was having a slightly better time than he was.
In short, she wasn't. Pacing around her room, she debated on her next step. A couple days ago she had been saddened by Buster's newly preferred distance; now all she could feel was anger. Why had he rejected her? Weren't her feet cute enough, didn't he like her ears up, or was it down? No, she had also gotten through wondering what was wrong with her, now it was Buster's turn to get picked apart; his hideously undefined muscles, his ugly ebony eyes, his odd smile, his . . .
She loved everything about him, from his scrawny physique to his corny sense of humor, and he pushing her away was the worst thing she had ever experienced. He was going out of his way to avoid her; the only time they were in the same room was that damn sixth period. She had expected tears at first, but instead she found herself trying to keep from breaking into his house and repeatedly punching him in the face. She crashed onto her bed and dialed her friend Harriet's number, prepared to talk someone's head off.
Imagine her fright when she reached voicemail; she immediately hung up, not bothering with the beep. Now what could she do, aside from slowly going stir crazy in her room? "Babs sweetie, could you watch your brothers and sisters for us!" Her mom shouted.
"Great, more babysitting." She mumbled to herself; now that she wasn't hanging out at Buster's house, her parents had taken advantage of her free time; mom was happy she could leave her children in good hands and go out while daddy was happy that his little girl was no longer spending hours with a boy in a secluded area. "Sure mom, I'd love too!" She yelled, rolling her eyes in the process.
At least she had her siblings to keep her distracted, and they were required to say they loved her. "Yippee, self-pity, a girl's best friend." Lately she found that the only tone she could speak in was sarcasm. She started rearranging her room (the fifth time in the past two hours), moving her dresser to the north wall, pushing her television to the west, flipping her mattress over, and various other things that she had moved fifteen minutes ago.
She had officially reached stir crazy.
Sun setting, Buster slowly journeyed home from the bank, where he had put another hundred and thirty dollars into his account; walking through the forest, he stared at his feet as they shuffled through the short grass. Is everything this hard when it comes to love? He wondered, passing fellow toons as he walked to his burrow. He reached his home, stopping at his door; he glanced at Babs' home a few yards away, the flowers surrounding it looking almost as miserable as he was.
He fought every urge to run over and utter the words that could make even the deepest rooted tree disappear, and he won, barely. The sun was officially down as the moon rose, shining its light through the trees; he jumped inside his home, slamming the door behind him. Silence was the only thing to greet him, besides darkness. Without Babs there, the place was sad and lonely; he walked into the living room, flipping the light switch and turning on the television as he passed by them.
Another quiet night, alone in his house, no one to talk to or play games with, just another frozen dinner and two hours in front of the television; he sighed and walked into the kitchen, opening the freezer door and looking for tonight's main course, if it could even be considered food. His thoughts moved to his neighbor, wondering what she was doing to occupy her free time, maybe she was talking to that friend of hers, Hannah or Hailey, something with an H; or maybe she was watching with some new guy who'd step in to his old position, either way, all he could do was wonder.
He gave up the search for food and slammed the freezer, then opened it and slammed it again; he continued this for two minutes before stomping out of the kitchen and into his living room, sitting in his chair and watching some news channel, which had the power to instantly bore him. He flipped through channels, finding nothing that looked even remotely interesting. After going through all the channels, twice, Buster turned off the television. Sitting in absolute silence, he stared at the black screen; nothing to do, no games to play, no one to talk with; this had to be hell, or something like it.
The walls were starting to close in on him; the air suddenly vanished as the temperature increased. He jumped from the couch and rushed to his door, opening it and breathing in the night air. He pushed out of the hole and closed the door, content with sitting in the grass and staring into the complete darkness; after a moment his eyes had adjusted, allowing him to see the outline of various things around him.
He was afraid of going back inside, lest his mind start closing the walls on him again; the rabbit grabbed a silver key from his sweater pocket and locked the door. He stood, stretching his legs, and began walking, not sure on where though, just positive that he didn't want to be there.
"Down Mortimer!" She ordered the small rabbit, shouting as loud as she possibly could. "Down now or I swear to all that is holy you will not live to regret this." She threatened.
The young rabbit did as instructed, albeit in a weird way, rather than just climbing down the fridge, he jumped, causing the teenage girl to dive in fright, barely catching him in time. Mortimer jumped out of her hands and continued his hyperactive rampage.
She wanted to lie on the ground for a little longer, but fear of being run over by a pack of eager young children got the better of her. "Babs baby, were home!" Her mother shouted. "Why is everyone still up?" She questioned.
Babs bit her tongue and rose from the kitchen floor, watching her siblings run to their parents with warm hugs. "Mommy! Daddy!" They all shouted, sounding like a mob of obsessed fans.
"Okay everyone, it's nice to see you all, but it's time for bed; we all have a busy day tomorrow." Her mom lectured, grabbing the hands of two and leading them to their rooms, her father copied the motion; Babs watched as her siblings so easily went to their beds, yawning and dragging their feet.
She used this distraction and stepped outside; letting the cool night air wash over her fatigued figure. Children everywhere, bouncing off the walls, nearly breaking anything, including themselves; she needed some peace. She could see Buster's house a few feet away; unable to control her legs, she walked over and knocked on the door in the ground.
No answer.
She wanted to turn around and just head back home, but again she found herself with no control over her actions. Buster's house had four keys, one for himself, one for his mother, one spare, and finally one for herself. She had left hers back in her room, so she relied on the spare one he kept hidden in a fake rock inches from the door. The girl unlocked the door and put the key and its rock back in place, stepping into the hole and shutting the door behind her; the living room light was on, but nothing else.
She sat on the red couch, not exactly sure what she doing, or even why; but she stayed there, and let warm memories wash over her. Had it really only been three days ago when she and Buster were having so much fun in this very room? Babs lied down and stared at the pictures hung around the room, enjoying their hollow comfort. It wasn't long before she fell asleep in the living room of her former best friend, closing her eyes for one second, which then turned to one minute, and so on.
The agitated buck stomped up to his door, cursing under his breath with each step; standing at the entrance to his burrow, he found himself staring at Babs' home, again. Buster sighed and turned to his door in the ground, immediately opening it. If his mind hadn't been so focused on the girl next door, he'd probably have noticed he had locked his door before leaving earlier. He continued his stomping through the living room, only able to stop when he could see the pink ears and bows attached to said ears laying over his couch's armrest. The first thing that came to mind was delusional hallucinations, or something along those lines; he reached for her arm, certain it would fade away the second he made contact.
It didn't. He stood over her, not sure what he should do; wake her up and take her home, get a blanket and let her spend the night. He opted on the latter and grabbed a spare blanket from the hall closet, covering her and watching as she reacted, snuggling up with it. "Babs, I-l l-love y-you." He found himself stuttering, waiting for her to vanish in thin air, as he had thought she would when he first found her; to his amazement, she didn't. "I love you." It was starting to get easier to say aloud.
After another moment of comfortable silence, Buster stood, fighting the urge to kiss her forehead, a battle he ultimately lost; she reacted by smiling and squeezing the blanket tightly. He walked into the kitchen and grabbed the cordless phone that hung on the wall, dialing Babs' home number. "Hello, Mrs. Bunny? It's Buster, yeah, yeah, she's over here. No, she's fine, asleep actually. Is it okay if she stays over tonight? Thanks." He placed the phone back on the receiver and turned off the kitchen light.
He took short, easily slow steps through the living room, enjoying how peaceful she looked, and while he would have preferred to stand there forever and stare at the girl, he found himself yawning. Buster turned off the light and walked to his room, imagining the scenarios that would take place tomorrow morning.
To his surprise, half of them were bad.
It was simple to impress a girl, or at least Buster had thought so; waking up early, well earlier than usual for a teenager on a Saturday, he tiptoed into the kitchen and looked through his cabinets for something fancier then cereal. Eggs, bacon, and toast, classic breakfast food and always a favorite; he hadn't had much experience with cooking and questioned why he even had a kitchen, and easily broke more than half of the carton of eggs. Eventually, he had managed to get two yolks in without their shells joining them.
He had toasted the bacon and burnt the toast, or was it the other way around? Either way neither looked even remotely edible, not even for Dizzy. Damn he wanted to order out, maybe a nice pizza or some Chinese food, but no, he had to do it the romantic way, or did he? Confusion, you can't get the girl without it; of course those romantic movies he had secretly enjoyed never said it'd be so hard to win over the girl. He sighed and dumped out the bacon and toast, then questioned where to go with the eggs.
Eggs? Bummer, she was hoping her mom would be making pancakes with the gooey syrup and butter, oh well. She stretched, yawning as she opened her eyes; no matter if they were underground, no matter if she was in absolute darkness, she could tell this wasn't her room, or her house. She jumped off the couch and waited for her eyes to adjust, which luckily didn't take that long.
Of course the second she recognized the place, the memories of last night flooded back into her mind; frustration from her family, walk to Buster's house, sitting on his couch, the very couch she had just woken up on. She was calm for a millisecond, then started freaking out over the fact that her now ex-best friend and still love interest had most likely seen her on said couch and was currently in the kitchen cooking breakfast.
"Calm down," She started telling herself. "Maybe Buster's not home, maybe it's just some sick weirdo trying to murder me." She said, oddly comforting herself with this other plan. "Who's just cooking a healthy meal to enjoy before said homicide." And the comfort was officially gone, replaced instead with new-found anxiety.
She could sneak out! Oh yes, avoid any conversations and make a swift exit; but that could create an even more awkward air between them, if that was even possible. She was having that feeling from last night, the one that preludes the uncontrollable urge to walk to Buster, though now it was changing its opinion and forcing her to the door. "Hey," Someone had greeted from behind.
Please be axe murderer. She crossed her fingers, then her other fingers, then her toes, and finally her ears. Give me Jason! She turned, looking directly into Buster's eyes before looking down at her feet, then up at the ceiling. "Hey," She waved half-heartedly.
"I know we're having a rough patch, but can you really pass up a free breakfast?" He asked.
She loved his voice, it had the ability to make her swoon, and she wasn't a typical swooner, few things had that swooning ability on her; and when did she start using the word swoon? She kicked herself back into the present situation. "Don't you think it'll be a little awkward, eating together when we haven't spoken in three days?"
"Well, we have to start talking sometime; I figure we could do it over the nice smell of eggs and frozen T.V. dinners." He shrugged, smiling coyly, as he tilted his head towards the kitchen.
Alas, another thing that made her swoon, how did he have this ability that controlled her so easily? She took in a deep breath, shaking her head. "Alright, but can you just forget what I said about the whole love thing?" Back in control of her body, she walked into the kitchen, passing beside him bit by bit. He breathed in her lovely scent and found himself following close behind her, taking in more and more of it as they reached the table. "Buster, you keep sniffing me and I swear what I do will look like a bloody accident." She threatened, pulling out the chair closest to the door, preparing for a haste storm off.
"You're so cute when you threaten with murder." He muttered, moving away from her. "Thanks for making this so easy."
"Oh, I'm sorry; I didn't realize our sudden separation was my fault!" She had shouted, her anxiety from before rapidly replaced with anger. "Forgive me for being a little ticked off that you went into isolation on me." She balled her hand into the tightest fist.
"I'm sorry," He whispered, leaving the kitchen.
"Oh no, bunny boy." She pushed away from the table and jumped out of the chair. "You can't just say you're sorry and wait for things to become okay." She followed him back into the living room. "Forget what I said about forgetting what I said!" She ordered.
"You know what Barbra Ann," He emphasized every syllable of her name, enjoying the sight of her wince at the sound. "You have no idea what I've been going through the past three days!"
"I have no idea? What about you, do you know how miserable I've been these last few days?" She had shouted. "I had to watch my siblings! Do you know how horrible family time is? It's like listening to Lady Gaga and Justin Beiber singing I Got You Babe for seventeen hours!"
Buster pushed the horrid thought away. "I'd kill for family time!" His voice was getting hoarse from the shouting. "You know how lucky you are to have so many people to care about you!"
She was starting to back down, her anger replaced by yet another emotion, shame or sadness. "Sorry." She whispered, staring at the ground rather than his eyes.
"The one person I have left to love and . . . and . . ." He stopped, immediately regretting the words.
"And she really hasn't been that understanding has she? But it wouldn't be so bad if he hadn't tried to avoid her." Babs returned to looking in his ivory colored eyes.
"If it means anything, he's sorry." Buster smiled. "And he'd really appreciate it if he could talk regularly."
She smiled back, and for the first time in what seemed like forever they were happy. "I think she'd like that too."
Buster wanted to hug her, to tell her that he had worked through whatever issue was keeping him from saying those words; he would have loved to have that necklace . . . but . . . "Wait here!" He ordered, disappearing in a blue blur.
And he returned in the exact same manner.
"Babs, I . . . I . . ." And again he paused, walking to the television and turning it on.
Babs walked up beside him, "Anyone ever tell you that you have the worse attention span ever?" She asked.
"If they did I probably wasn't listening."
She chuckled and turned to the glaring screen, which was currently displaying the weather. ". . . currently having a bout of heavy rain perfect for dramatic effect and confessing those special feelings for that special someone you've been avoiding for the past couple of days, so if you're planning a big confrontation we recommend you have it outside; coming up next, Jonas Brothers, they still can't sing."
"Perfect," Buster muttered.
"Well I know they're not the best singers, but they're not that bad." Babs defended.
"Come on!" He grabbed her arm and ran to the door, able to hear the booming thunder and pouring rain.
"Buster, don't even think about dragging me out into that-"
"Babsy, you just gotta trust me, it'll be fun." He released his grip on her arm and walked out the door, letting the ice cold rain hit his fur. It was surprisingly darker than it should have been, so much so that he made a mental note to recheck the time on his clock.
Babs groaned and reluctantly took the step outside; every drop of rain that hit her sent a chill up her spine. "Buster, mind telling me what we're doing out here."
"Oh right." Buster snapped his fingers and slicked back his ears. "Listen, I'm sorry about everything I've done." Another boom of thunder and a flash of lightning illuminated the darkened sky. "I've ignored you, and pushed you away; and all for what? A flashy necklace that I've come so close to getting."
"Flashy!" Her ears shot up.
"Yeah, but I've been an enormous idiot. It was so simple, right in front of me the whole time even."
"Well . . . could it be in front of you inside, cause this is my best blouse and the rains kind of ruining it." She examined her clothing while she spoke.
"I guess I was just a little stubborn, not wanting to have anything to do with my father."
"You don't say." She exclaimed, wearing a plastic yellow raincoat over her body that she had seemingly gotten from thin air.
"Of all the bad things he's done, he had one good idea." Buster reached into the pocket of his drenched sweater and pulled out a small black box.
"Whoa Buster! Is that an engagement ring!" She shouted over the rain.
"Babs-" Buster got on his knee, though recoiled slightly when he felt mud.
"Oh yes, yes. Of course I'll marry you!" She was jumping up and down, splashing water in the blue buck's face. Another flash of light in the sky was followed with a deafening boom.
"What!" He shouted, "I can't hear you!" Buster shook his head and mumbled something. "My father gave this to my mom when they were first dating; it was the only thing he owned that was worth anything!" Buster opened the box, showing her the shining blood red ruby. "I swear the second I have the money I will get you the biggest and greatest ring in the world! But until then, please say you'll forgive me!"
Well it's not an engagement ring, but . . . "One condition," She replied.
"Anything!" He eagerly agreed.
"Say it." She ordered, not bothering to explain what 'it' was, though they both knew.
"But-"
"But nothing," She interrupted. "I promise I will never leave you, or let you go, depending on the situation." She shrugged and smiled devilishly.
"How do I know you won't leave?" He asked, trembling from the freezing rain.
"You've just gotta trust me Buster." She said, a small glow of hope in her eyes.
"I . . . I love . . . I love you." He choked out.
"What! I can't hear you!" Babs teased, holding a hand up to her ear.
"I love you!" He shouted, standing up and getting near her ear. Babs instantly pressed her lips against his, and for a second he was completely awe struck.
But only for a second; soon he found his tongue wrestling with hers, then the arms wrap around her waist; eventually he had forgotten they were out in the rain, though when they broke apart for air it became abundantly clear that they either get inside to warm up, or get closer to each other.
They decided they could do both.
Slowly they moved inside, positive they couldn't get anymore drenched then they already were. "Mind saying it again?" She asked as Buster walked out of his room in a dry red shirt.
Strangely, he didn't. "I love you Barbra Ann Bunny." He exclaimed, pulling the ring from earlier out of his pocket. "It kinda fell in the mud when you kissed me, but I cleaned it." He got back down on one knee. "I really have no idea what I'm doing, so you'll have to suffer through a little corniness."
"Piece of information, don't get in the proposal pose unless you plan on actually proposing." She explained, pulling him back off the ground.
Buster groaned, "Right, well we've had a big separation, a fight, and declared our feelings in the rain which was followed by an intimate kiss; I think we can wait awhile before a sequel." He said.
"Just put on the ring!" She said, hitting his shoulder.
"Babs, I just want you to know that-"
"You're taking way to long," She grabbed the ring and pushed it onto her finger, a little snug but not unbearable; holding it up to the light, she enjoyed how it matched her fur and seemed to make it glow along with the jewel. "So how did your dead beat dad get something this fancy?" She asked.
"It's actually been in his side of the family for ages, and every time they gave it to their girlfriend, they would marry a few years later." Buster felt the room get a little quieter, how he could feel quiet however, was unknown. "I guess he was the only one to ever leave his family."
Babs paused from marveling, "So is this like-"
"An early proposal?" He interrupted, looking at anything but her. "Well, yes. But I'd understand if you didn't want to be part of the family curse." The words left a sour taste in his mouth, and his heart was beating rapidly from fear that she'd actually leave him.
But that fear didn't last too long, for Babs pulled him close and continued from where they had previously left off, mainly locking lips and making him lose every coherent thought. "I always figured we'd end up together; you're just stuck with me blue boy." She whispered into his ear.
"How will I ever manage?" He was prepared to continue fighting with her tongue over territory of her mouth, but sadly was interrupted by the ringing of the phone.
"Don't even think about it." She whispered, pushing him away from the nearest phone. "I'm going to make you forget about everything but me." She whispered, oh so seductively.
"I think I know what you mean." Buster tried to keep from smiling like an idiot, but found it was a losing battle. "Wait, what's with the giant mallet?" He asked when he saw Babs pull out . . . well, a giant mallet.
"This is for taking so long!" She shouted, though Buster had already bolted out of the burrow and was running through the raining forest. "You get back here!" She had shouted, running after him.
Longest one shot I have ever written and I'm not sure if I captured the Tiny Toons feeling, I hope so. Plucky's Shalhoub rant was my favorite gag in the whole story, and I do believe Mr. Shalhoub earned his Emmys. I understand the series ends with them getting together, but I just wanted to make a sappy romance fic that ended happily ever after, at least until the sequel.
Yeah, at least until the sequel.
Buster working for the necklace he was never able to obtain, felt kind of weird to move though that subject and straight into an entirely different one, right? But hey, if I get even one review asking me to write a second chapter about Buster obtaining it, I will!
Thanks for reading, and have a good night, everyone.
Oh, and remember, if you ever have a big confrontation, I recommend waiting until a convenient rain storm to set the mood.
Where was I? Oh yes!
Good night all you toonatics, or animaniacs, or Pinky and the Brainiacs; whichever you prefer.