Summary: Artemis Fowl II is 17 years old. He enters his study at Fowl manor to find a letter addressed to him on his desk from… himself? What is this letter about? How did it get into fowl manor? Who wrote it? Why am I asking you? One shot. Might make it more if people like it.
Disclaimer: I do not own the song letter to me by brad paisley. I also do not own Artemis Fowl by Eion Colfer.
A/N: this is my first fic ever so be nice. written after "The Time Paradox" and as if "the Atlantis Complex" didn't exist. 'like this are Artemis' thoughts.'
THE MYSTERIOUS LETTER
A very disgruntled Artemis Fowl II returns home to Fowl manor after a particularly boring and irritating day at Saint Bartleby's school for young adults. (During his three year trip through the time stream the all boy's school was integrated with the local all girl's school.) Artemis is now in his senior year at the school and the boy's 15 year old body is rapidly taking on the form of the 17 year old man it was supposed to become during his three year absence. These changes were taking place through a series of very painful accelerated growth. In the last six months he has grown seven inches to become six feet tall, and his scrawny frame has filled out considerably. He has become quite attractive through these painful changes and all of the girls at school seemed to have noticed these changes along with the fact that the young genius is the heir to the Fowl Empire and fortune.
Artemis stormed up the grand staircase and headed for his study grumbling under his breath about third rate professors not knowing what their talking about, and boy crazed girls ruining his new suit, and disheveling his hair. He typed in the security code on the study door and stepped inside the door closing behind him. He made his way to one of the many computers planning on hacking to Foaly's database to see if the Centaur had invented anything interesting lately, but mainly just to calm himself. He found Foaly was the only one whose security system was even a small to challenge to him, and breaking in to it was somehow calming.
As he sat down at the computer Artemis noticed a white envelope sitting on his desk. 'Odd' he thought, 'butler never said anything about a letter waiting for me when he picked me up.' Artemis slowly made his way over to the desk and inspected the letter without picking it up. He noticed the letter was addressed to him. Not odd considering it was in his study. He reached over and hit the intercom button.
"Butler?" he called. He removed his finger from the button and waited.
"Yes Master Artemis?" Came the manservant's reply.
"Did you leave a letter in my study?" He asked.
"No." came the confused man's answer. Artemis then noticed the return address. It said 'Fowl Manor, Dublin, Ireland.' The senders name read 'Artemis Fowl II'
Artemis' eyes widened. "Butler get to the study now I believe we have a breach in security." There was no reply; Artemis was not expecting one for he knew the manservant would be making his way to study at a run. Most people would see the address and sender and think it was either a mistake or a joke, not Artemis. Artemis had many enemies, some human some inhuman, most were very smart, all wanted him dead. And a harmless letter would be the perfect way to get rid of him. But the question that really bothered Artemis was 'How did the letter get into the manor without setting off security?' His parents were on Vacation in Hawaii for a week, so they couldn't have put it there, and Juliet had taken Myles and Becket Fowl to Disneyland Paris for a few days so she didn't bring it in. so how did it get in then? 'Unless' he thought 'what if the letter was sent from myself in the future? But still how would it have been done?'
Artemis' musings were interrupted by the study door being kicked open, and spilt in several pieces and Butler entering the room Sig Sauer drawn. "That was an expensively made custom door." The boy mumbled to himself as his bodyguard made his way to Artemis and asked what was wrong.
Artemis pointed to the letter and said in a calm monotone "It would seem old friend that somehow this letter got into the manor without you noticing or setting off any of the alarms." Butler pointed his gun at the offending letter and shoved Artemis behind him. Artemis continued "Also the letter is sent to myself at Fowl Manor but is also sent from myself at Fowl Manor. I do not believe it be an accident. So if you would please transport it to the lab for further examination I will meet you there shortly.
Butler nodded and said in his deep voice "I'll take it down right now, but I will do all examination and you will be in your room waiting for me to clear it as safe." Artemis opened his mouth to protest but was cut off by Butler "No buts Artemis, The LEP have not caught the Opal from the past, and she wants you dead more than anyone else, plus she has the capability to get into the manor without detection and could easily put something lethal into this envelope. You will be in your room while check it out."
"Fine." Artemis said calmly. He then walked down the hall to his room closing and locking the door behind him. He then booted up his laptop and accessed the Manor's security camera in the lab. 'Butler may be able to stop me from being there but he can't stop me from watching' he thought.
Artemis watched the screen and saw Butler come into view carrying the letter at arms length on a piece of wood that looked suspiciously like part of his study door. Artemis watched Butler set it down on one of the examination tables using a pair of tongs. He then began to run various scanners over it checking for any electronics. Once he determined there was no electronics he ran the letter through a machine that would tell him exactly what the letter was made of. A minute later a BEEP was heard signifying the scan was complete. Butler checked the screen to find it was made of paper and ink. A normal letter. He then took the letter and opened it carefully and found a single piece of paper inside. He then unfolded the letter and began to read. Artemis watched Butler read for a moment, and finish with a smile/smirk on his face. This made Artemis extremely curious as to what the letter was about, for butler hardly ever smiled. Butler then looked at the camera and said "I know you're watching Artemis, so come down. It's safe"
A minute later Artemis walked into the lab and up to butler who was still smiling. As Artemis was about to ask about the letter Butler stopped him and gestured to the open letter and saying "The letter is just a letter for you. I will leave so you can read it in privacy."
Artemis replied "Why leave if you have already read the letter? Which as you know I saw you do."
Butler simply said "you instructed me to stop reading after a certain point and so I did." Then left the room.
Artemis ran to the door shouting "What do you mean I instructed you to stop? I did no such thing!"
His only answer was an amused "you will understand soon, and believe me you did." From down the hall.
Artemis then walked to the table and picked up the letter. It read. (A/N: Italic is letter, normal is song lyrics ('in Parenthesis are Thoughts'))
Dear, 17 year old Artemis
Hello Artemis, or should I say hello Butler first, because I know he will not let you read this until he declares it safe. Allow me to introduce myself. I am Artemis fowl the second in the future, age thirty to be precise. I know 17 year old Artemis is probably declaring that this is a trick and Butler is most likely thinking the same but this is no trick, and to prove this and I will gain your trust. I will gain your trust soon Artemis, but first I must gain the trust of Butler so he will let you read this. Butler old friend you once told me something when you thought you were going to die. You told me something few people know or will ever know. You told me your first name. (Something you were never supposed to do I might add) but you did and what's done is done; now on with my point, your name old friend is Dmovio Butler. ('what! Only three people alive know Butler's first name, and they are Butler, me, and Butler's sister Juliet. so then this must really be me,') Now Butler I have some issues of some… ah… sensitivity to discuss with my younger self so if you would please stop reading now. ('So that's what Butler meant when he said I told him to stop reading')
Now Artemis if you still do not believe I am you from the future I'll prove It's me by saying look under your bed there's a micro safe, with a copy of "The Book" in it no one else would knew you had. ('No one, not even Butler knows about the safe and the copy of "The Book", this really is from me. But why did I send this letter?') You're probably wondering why I decided to send this letter to you. Have no fear nothing is wrong but I decided to give you some advice. You probably don't see you have so much going for you, going right, and I know at 17 it's hard to see what's wrong and right. Trust me everything becomes clear very soon with a bit of help from our favorite elf. Speaking of holly, you probably want to know if holly completely forgives you. ('YES! Please I need to know will she forgive me. Will our friendship ever be the same?) Don't worry holly will forgive you, and still you feel like there's a knife you stuck into her back, ( 'yes I do feel like I stabbed her in the back') You'll make it through this and you'll see, You're still around to write this letter to me. Also a little thing about your love life ('love life? I do not have a love life. And if it did I would only want Holly in it. WHAT! NO! No, no, no, no, no! I do not think about Holly like that! We're just friends! Right? Right. Wrong. AH! Fighting with myself is pointless') And when you get a date with holly make sure the gas tank is full, on second thought forget it that one turns out kind of cool. And trust me your "elf kissing days" as holly put it are NOT as over as you think. (YES! I get a date with holly! Wait do I only get one date? And will my elf kissing days not be over forever, or just for a period of time? Holly's right I do always speak in riddles.') Also each and every time you have a fight, just assume you're wrong and mom and dad are right. ('Ridiculous! For them to be right I would have to wrong, and I am never wrong!') You're probably thinking something like "I am the great Artemis fowl II Criminal master mind! I am never wrong!" well just go with it because it makes life easier. And you should really thank holly, she spends so much extra time, it's like she sees the Diamond underneath, and she's polishing you until you shine. ('True I have made most of my progress of becoming a decent and moral human being thanks to her.') You've got so much up ahead, you'll make new friends, and you should see your kids and wife. I won't say who, but I will say I believe you know her now. (Kids! Wife! I know my future wife now? The only girls I know now are: Juliet, Holly, and Minerva. Juliet is like my sister so it can't be her. So then it's either holly or Minerva, but which one? Am I always this infuriating?') now some final requests: I wish you'd be more social, I wish you'd take a martial arts class, I wish you wouldn't worry and let it be, so I say have a little faith and you'll see, you're still around to write this letter to me. So I suppose I will see you in the mirror in about 13 years Arty .Until then take care. Also do NOT tell holly about this letter EVER! If she ever finds out she will literally kill me. And since we are the same person you die as well.
Sincerely,
Artemis Fowl II
Artemis finished reading the letter and was very frustrated. 'I am positive 90% of that letter was written just to confuse me about my future! No more than 90%.' Artemis walked out of the lab and made his way to the lobby of Fowl Manor where he knew he'd find butler waiting. As expected Butler was sitting in an arm chair reading the newest copy of "Guns & Ammo." Butler looked up as Artemis walked in "Anything interesting in that letter Artemis?" he asked with a smirk. He knew from the boy's body language something in the letter angered him and that now would be a perfect time to poke a bit of fun at him.
"Oh it was extremely interesting, but I can't make heads or tails of half of its content! It's all in riddles!" Artemis shouted. Then in a much calmer voice "May I ask you something Butler?" Butler nodded. "Do I always speak like this? In riddles that no one can decipher?"
Butler looked up again and asked "do you want an honest answer?" Artemis nodded. "Then yes you do always speak in riddles. I don't understand what you mean half the time and I've been your bodyguard since the day you were born, I just trust you and just go with it."
Artemis nodded his head and spoke "well old friend it would seem were about have another one of your "I-don't-understand- but –I'm- just- going- to-trust-Artemis-and-go-with- the-plan" moments. I want to know what everything in this letter means and I will know. I'm going to meditate. " He then turned and walk toward and up the grand stair case. He reached the top and turned to walk into his study and grimaced when he saw the door in pieces on the floor. He turned toward his room and called over his shoulder to Butler "Butler while I'm in my room would you please bring one of the replacement doors to the study?" he continued walking a plan forming in his mind.
"Yes Artemis." Butler replied and set about his new task of replacing the study's door. Artemis continued walking to his room a plan forming in his mind. 'The first thing I must do is find a way to contact No.1 without The LEP finding out, and then I need to get Holly to help me.' He thought as he entered his room. Oh yes Artemis would get his answers.
Yay I finished! So what do you guys think should I continue and make it a chapter story or leave it as a one shot? My first fic ever so be nice. Yeah so R&R love you all
-Up In Arms100