SHALL WE DARE
Warning: Crackfic (I think). Fluff. Humor. Slight Parody. This spontaneous thing was written while I was stuck at the airport with a sleep-deprived and Darvey-inated brain. I plead non compos mentis. Shamelessly screwy, cheesy, and irreverent - because life is better when we're smiling or feeling confused.
87TH TIME'S A CHARM
"Donna, have you seen my-"
She passed Harvey a folder.
"Also, I didn't get a chance to-"
She thrusted a cup of coffee into his hand.
"And it's-"
"…your niece's birthday. I've sent her a huge teddy bear from Uncle Harvey."
Harvey was the kind of uncle who loved to spoil the kids - in unique ways. He was klutzy when it came to showing affection like normal human beings. He didn't do peek-a-boos. He was hopeless at complimenting crayon drawings. Even so, his niece and nephew adored him because they knew he'd do anything for them. Whether it was closing off amusement parks for an exclusive play day or helping them skip pre-K classes, they only needed to ask. As for his taste in picking presents? Horrid. One Christmas, he'd almost gotten them tech stocks. To promote a happy childhood, Donna had since hijacked all his gifting occasions.
"Exactly how huge are we talking about?" Harvey studied Donna's too innocent expression, a mischievous glint in her eyes. It only meant one thing - she'd gone way overboard. "Marcus is going to preach to me for hours, isn't he?"
"Ahhh. The Specter ears may suffer, but your niece will think of you as her favorite uncle."
"I'm her only uncle."
"Really? Poor girl!" Donna's lips curved into a wicked smile. "See? She can't even count on other uncles to exist. Makes it even easier for you to be her favorite."
"You sure you're not an evil incarnate?"
"I'm your karma." She tittered at his mock pout before adding, "It's a wonderful present. She'll love it. Trust my judgment?"
Harvey practically outsourced all of life management to her. She could buy his niece a koala or a yellow submarine, and he'd still whole-heartedly endorse it. "Always. Thank you, Donna."
"Wait."
"What's wrong?"
"You have a thing." She flicked the speck-like thing off his black suit. "There. You're all set."
Harvey flashed Donna a bright smile. "Marry me?"
His eighty-seventh proposal. Or whatever the number was - she'd stopped counting after the ninth time. 'Marry me' was Harvey's default response to Donna doing things for him. When she completed his sentences. When she anticipated what he needed. When she straightened his tie or in this case, made sure he was Uncle of the Year, thing-less, and looked immaculate in his suit.
She recalled how she'd gone into a state of shock the first time he'd uttered those words. They'd just joined the firm for a few months, their one night together still fresh in her mind. Only when she'd caught his smirk did she realize he was joking. The question had initially stirred deeper feelings that she'd forced herself to ignore, both keeping to boundaries as colleagues and friends. Over the years, Donna naturally developed immunity against Harvey's mindless proposal (aka. 'The Blurt') and usually blew it off with inane comebacks.
'No, thanks. I'm allergic to lawyers.'
'Can't. Got cooking class on our big day.'
'I prefer Mike's surname. Gives my name a nice Diva ring.'
'No. Our babies would be too beautiful and ruin it for other babies.'
'Can't. I'm engaged to Ryan. Which Ryan? I'm not sure. I was too wasted that night. Hmmm, or was it Keanu?"
Today, however, 'usually' didn't come to work. 'Spur of the moment' showed up instead. Donna launched a fireball his way.
"One of these days, Harvey, I am going to say 'Yes'." She watched the blood drain from his face. "How predictable! You're only good at the bluffing without the commitment. Why ask if you're not ready to follow through?"
Harvey winced. Blink. Blink. Blurt. "Are you saying you want to marry me?"
"Are you proposing again? Whatever, you'll just back out at the last second anyway."
The dig grated on his nerves. "Are you calling me a coward?"
"I'm calling you a NATO man."
"What the hell is a NATO man?"
"No Action, Talk Only Man. If you had the balls…and not the autographed basketballs, we'd be married by now." She didn't mean any of it. She simply enjoyed seeing Harvey rattled, adding a careless shrug to amplify the effect.
"Donna Paulsen, you are so asking for it."
"Oh my! Another bluff!" Donna schooled her features to utmost boredom. "All that sounds like to me is 'Harvey Specter is still evasive and too scared to pop the question'."
"That's it. Let's go," Harvey demanded. It wasn't like he had meetings to attend or a firm to run. Actually, he did. Screw it! Harvey wasn't one to back out of a challenge. He was born to win. "We're getting married!"
"Is that a dare?" Donna snickered at the absurdity.
"It's a promise. We'll see who chickens out first!"
"You're so going lose."
Harvey seized Donna's hand and dragged her along, her steps barely catching up with his longer strides.
"Woah, Harvey. Where are we going?"
"We're shopping for wedding props."
"In a law firm?"
"Yes. We're a resourceful bunch."
A STRANGE GANG OF PROPS
A minute later, they arrived at the associates bullpen.
"Everyone, listen up!"
At Harvey's shout, the chattering halted as newbies magically transformed into the city's best-dressed stones. The quiet trepidation stretched on because Harvey Specter never came around here. It was what Louis would describe as 'a rockstar visiting the slums' sort of affair.
"Eeek!" One squeak pierced through the air.
Harvey smiled at Owner of the Squeak. "I'm flattered by the 'eeek', but a normal 'hello' would have sufficed." He faced the general non-squeaky inanimate group of lawyers and asked, "Can any of you officiate a marriage?"
Harold, who stood at the far corner, nervously raised his hand. "I c-can, H-harvey. C-certified by the M-marriage M-ministry."
"Great! Harold, please come with me. The rest of you can resume whatever you were doing." Without waiting, Harvey tugged Donna forward to shop for their next prop. Donna tried to yank her hand away only to find Harvey tightening his grip. Things were heating up, and she was evidently reeling inside. Good!
"Feeling okay, Donna? Don't pull a panic attack on me."
She narrowed her eyes. "Having 'panic attacks' is not a Donna thing. Still bluffing?"
"Still shopping," Harvey corrected as they stopped at Mike's desk. "Meet prop number two."
"Hey, Harvey! What's up?" Mike asked, uncertain what to make of the wonky trio of Harvey, Donna, and a pale Harold.
"Mike, get your suit on and come along. Please ask Rachel to join us too."
"Rachel's away in London," Mike said, slipping his arms into the jacket.
"Next best thing, then," Harvey bit out and led them on.
Trailing close, Mike asked, "Donna, what's going on?"
"Harvey's bloated ego is going on. I implied that he's a coward."
"You didn't?" Mike sucked in a breath.
Harvey pitched in, "She did, and I'm going to make her eat her own words."
"In that case, I'm rooting for Donna." Mike waggled his brows. "She's got more spunk."
"I hire you off the streets, and this is how you repay me? Where's the loyalty?" Approaching Prunie Island, Harvey knocked against the glass door. "Louis, follow me."
Louis sneered. "Excuse me? You think you can just come in and order me around?"
"Exactly," Harvey answered with a straight face.
Heavy silence. One second. Two seconds.
"Okay, I'm in!" And just like that, Louis ecstatically joined their pact. "This mysterious adventure is so exciting, I feel like I'm in Lord of the Rings."
Mike choked. "Which means Harvey is Aragon..."
"Mike, if you say I am Gimli because of my red hair, I will declare war against you," Donna cut in.
Harvey stifled a laugh as Mike quickly pointed out, "No, Donna, you're the elegant Arwen. And Louis is…Gollum?"
"Sam Wiseass Ross! I have the pure soul of an elf. That makes me Legolas, asshole," Louis snapped. "So, what's happening?"
Again? Deja vu conversation. Harvey gritted through his teeth, "If we could all hold off our questions, please. We're almost there."
"There? As in 'where' you beg off?" Donna taunted.
"I'm coming out of this laughing," Harvey jabbed as they entered his mentor's office. "Hello, Jessica. I need you and this room to prove something." With that, Harvey dropped Donna's hand and began rearranging furniture. Jessica's furniture.
From her desk, Jessica curiously watched the weird ensemble of five invade her place. Because Mike looked the most neutral of them all, she walked over to him. "Has Harvey lost his mind? Is that what he's trying to prove? I have to say...it's working."
"I don't know, Jessica, but I sure hope they are moving in the right direction."
"Can't wait for Mom and Dad to get together?"
Mike shrugged. "After so many years, I've learned not to get too vested in their 'will-they-won't-they'. When it crashes, it burns every time."
Jessica bumped her shoulder to his. "Don't give up yet, Mike. I personally live for the surprises."
The 'surprise' came three seconds later when Harvey started rummaging through her desk. "Jessica, I need two paper clips."
Paper clips? Five pair of eyes stared at him in bewilderment. In what alternate universe did the great Harvey Specter need paper clips?
"Second drawer," Jessica answered, feeling too fascinated to stop him. For a whole minute, she watched Harvey attack two paper clips with his fingers.
Meanwhile, Donna discerned that his fancy performance was another tactic to scare her off. Not fooled by it for a second, she continued to exude the confidence of a goddess. In other words, she was busy being her awesome self.
"Harold, you stand here. Louis, this is your spot. Mike, you're here," Harvey directed.
Louis dragged his feet over. "Can you finally tell me what is going on, Harvey? Are we rehearsing for a Spice Girls routine? If so, I'm Posh Spice."
"You're Donna's bridesmaid. Is that posh enough for you?"
Jessica's eyes widened, Louis's jaw dropped, and Mike sprinted to his assigned place. "That makes me the groomsman, right?"
Louis objected over Mike's question, "You couldn't have told me earlier? I've always wanted to sing at Donna's wedding. I need to prepare myself!"
Donna beamed. "Awww. That's so sweet, Louis."
"Right? But flaky Romeo, here, had to ruin everything. Couldn't you have planned ahead, Harvey? It's a freakin' wedding!" Louis glared at flaky Romeo. "Count your blessings, because even without rehearsals, I remember the lyrics to 'Because You Mmpphh...'"
Overwhelmed by the verbal tsunami, Harvey stapled Louis's lips shut with his fingers. "Do you hear that, Louis?"
"Hmmmph mmm, hmmm-m?" (Subtitle/Hmmm Language Translation: Hear what, Harvey?)
"The beautiful sound of you not talking. Let's prolong it," Harvey said before removing his hand. "And I'm sure as hell not flaky."
He scanned the hallways that was beginning to fill with a crowd. Ah, the perks of working in a law firm. They employed investigative folks who were formally attired - good enough even for impromptu marriages. There it was - another handy prop he could use: fake guests for a fake wedding.
Turning to Jessica, Harvey requested, "You're our witness and honorary guest. If you would be so kind to come over here."
Amused, Jessica pleasantly took part in Harvey's game. "Of course."
"Lastly, my dear Donna. It's time for us marry."
Harvey's arrogance was illuminating out of every pore - so much that Donna prepped her own claws, ready to strike back. "Loving the bravado, my dear Harvey. Are your toes tingling? Feeling the need to run?"
They locked gazes, her smug expression telling Harvey she was not backing out. Meanwhile, Mike imagined if two people could get pregnant by looking at each other, they'd be blessed with triplets by now.
Louis's sudden shout put an end to the baby-making eye battle. "You can't marry Donna!"
"Says who?" Harvey asked irritably.
"Says me! I just promoted myself to Donna's Maid of Honor, and I take my role very seriously. You haven't proposed to her. Engagement before marriage, Harvey!"
Louis had presumably caught on to the dare and was contributing generously. Next to him, Jessica and Mike poorly hid their laughters behind coughs, expecting Harvey to wimp out and throw in the towel. He had no such intention, smartly turning this opportunity into another strategic move.
"Donna Roberta Paulsen." Harvey shocked everyone by getting down on one knee, embellishing the moment with a gentleman's bow. "Marry me?"
Even knowing it was all a sham, Donna was rendered speechless by the sight of Harvey kneeling before her. There it was. The Blurt: Original Edition. He'd kept the same words. Nothing more. Nothing less. And that signature smile? Deadly. Then, the insufferable man winked, breaking her out of her trance. Remembering they were still competing for the finale, she put on her full Paulsen charm. "Yes. I will marry you, Harvey Reginald Specter."
Her consent prompted faint giggles, their audience anticipating who'd be the first to fold. Undoubtedly, everyone was onto their dare.
When Donna placed her hand in his, Harvey's smile deepened into one so genuine, so sunny that it threatened to turn Donna into mush. Quickly helping Harvey onto his feet, she issued a warning to unmushify herself, "It's still not too late to abort."
"You'd like that, wouldn't you?" Harvey countered in a low voice. "Louis. We're engaged. Can we get married now?"
"No!" This time it was Mike. "If Louis gets to be Maid of Honor, I'm upgrading to myself to Best Man." He ran over to the sideboard, pulled a few flowers from a vase, and shoved the bundle into Donna's hands. "Here you go."
Jessica scowled. "Did you have to murder my bouquet? The staff spends a lot of time and effort to make my office look chic and admirable. You've ruined the whole setting."
"Sorry. This is such an impulsive wedding, I had no time to prepare," Mike justified. "Harvey, where are the rings?"
When Harvey offered Louis and Mike the two improvised rings (aka. ex-paperclips), Donna commented drily, "Paperclip rings? You are such a romantic."
"I certainly am. Alright, Harold. You're sure you can do this. Legally." Harvey deliberately emphasized the last word to hammer some sense into Donna. She didn't even blink. Such a worthy opponent!
Improv Minister Harold nodded. "Yes. Should I b-begin the c-ceremony?"
"Yes," Harvey and Donna said in unison, both determined to come out of this the victor.
SOUNDS LIKE V-V-VOWS
"D-dearly beloved, we are gathered here today in Ms. Jessica P-pearson's office to join Harvey R-reginald Specter and D-donna Roberta Paulsen in holy matrimony." Harold paused. "I forgot to ask. Do you have your own v-v-vows prepared?"
"Donna, darling, your vow please?" Harvey was counting on his fake bride-to-be to succumb anytime now.
"My vow. Let's see. I can think of three reasons we should get married, Harvey. One - half the firm can quote the 'you can't be you without me' line, so it's public knowledge that you need me. Two - I own your calendar - yes, even the Mayan one. And three - I so look forward to bringing you coffee, stapling your documents, and taking care of your mess. It gives my life such glorious meanings. So yes, let's get married for all those wonderful reasons," Donna said with a deadpan face.
At her sarcasm, Mike chipped in for gags. "I hope bringing coffee, stapling documents, or taking care of Harvey's mess are euphemisms for something else."
Harvey smirked at the cheeky comment. "Shut up, kid. Is it my turn?"
An alarm clattered in Donna's mind. Their silly dare was about to cross the irreversible 'law' line, and as usual, she had to be the logical one. "Stop, Harvey. Let's call this whole thing off before we cross the point of no return. I lose. Are you happy?"
At those words, Harvey stilled - the earlier playfulness knocked out of his system. He understood that the game was over. But his heart - or whatever it was that was beating frantically inside his chest - had its own mind. He didn't want to win…anything.
Are you happy? He'd been happy at the notion of being married to her, even when it was all a pretense. Now? He was empty. How odd it was that it took a foolish dare to see that this outcome had always been inevitable. As spontaneous as the realization was, Harvey had never been more sure about anything in his life. He was in love with her - a fact he'd instinctively known for the longest time but was never honest enough to admit it.
"What if I don't want us to return?" Harvey heard himself say. "What if I want us to move forward?"
"Be serious, Harvey." Donna was convinced that he was still running high on adrenaline from their dare.
"I am being serious. I admit that I didn't wake up this morning thinking I want to be shackled to you. Scrap that, give me a moment." Harvey took a deep breath, while the guests held theirs. He collected his thoughts and tried again. This time more slowly. More carefully. More honestly.
"You've watched me mess up relationships again and again. It's true that I've never been able to commit to anyone. I can't believe that it's taken a silly dare to help me understand it all but I realize now that it could never work with anyone else because I've always been committed to you, Donna. My heart knew it all along, but I was too blind to see it. With you, it's different. You know me. You're my favorite redhead. You've always been more to me than an assistant or a colleague. You are my work wife. My accomplice in clever pranks. My best friend. My person, who even after everything I put us through, never lost faith in me. My...Donna. You are the only woman in my life who really knows me, and I don't ever want to find out what kind of man I'd be without you. The idea of being married to you makes me happy. The thought of waking up next to you feels like the most natural thing in the world. I need you, Donna - as my life partner, as my wife."
Willing his voice not to tremble, Harvey continued, "You've put me first for years. Let me spend the rest of my life 'putting you first'. I promise to keep you safe. I promise to try my best to make you laugh. Everyday - until we're old and gray. And though you'll have no teeth left, this silver fox will never desert you." That last ridiculous remark earned him a chuckle. "Donna Roberta Paulsen, I promise to take care of you, your heart, your life, your everything…if you will trust me with them."
Donna never could have braced herself for Harvey's vow. She'd long dropped the flowers, her vision blurred with unshed tears. Beside them, their friends and colleagues quietly waited for her answer.
Nothing. Five seconds. Still nothing.
Donna's lack of reaction was driving Harvey crazy. He shifted anxiously, muttering to Mike, "Was it too much? Too out of character?"
Mike sniffed, puppy eyes glazed with a glossy sheen. "A bit. I think you're supposed to be emotionally flawed and incredibly suck at sentimental speeches. But I believe it's doing wonders for the shippers' souls. So proud of you, bro."
One of the aforementioned shippers named Louis Litt spoke over Harvey and Mike's private discussion, "That was goddamn beautiful! It's about time you made an honest woman out of Donna!"
Donna and Harvey whirled towards Louis. How did he know about their one night?
Louis flushed. "Shit! I was speaking generically. You two slept-? I can't take this crappery! Donna, just marry him already!"
"Say yes, Donna!" Rachel's voice unexpectedly sounded from Mike's phone. On the screen, Donna caught her best friend waving at her, and she gave up holding back the tears.
Harvey reached out to dab her cheeks with a handkerchief. "I am praying that these are...happy tears?"
Donna could hardly wrap her head around what was happening. Though he'd never said it in so many words, she realized there had always been love between them. In the banters. In the simple gestures. In his unwavering loyalty. Harvey was Harvey, the role model of the most stubborn, easily aggravated, and emotionally unavailable man across every universe. But in his own way, he'd always been there for her. He'd cared for her. He'd loved her - even in his silence.
Embarrassed by her tears, she diverted the attention away. "Who still carries a handkerchief around? Is it the 18th century?"
Harvey pocketed the handkerchief and held his hand out for her. "Apparently, one very hopeful fiancé still does. What do you say, Donna? Will you trust me with..."
She banished every 'I don't feel anything' lie she'd ever told herself. She let down the guards she'd put up to protect herself. In a dream-like state, she placed her hand in his and laced their fingers together.
"Take it, Harvey. My hand, my life. My heart has always been yours anyway. You were and always would be the love of my life."
Love of my life. Harvey's eyes misted as he threw his head back and laughed amidst the loud cheers that erupted around them.
"Harold, complete the ceremony now, or I will fire your ass," Louis barked, dabbing his eyes with his tie.
Harold performed the rest of the formalities. "I now pronounce you man and wife." Blinking at the newlyweds, he temporarily phased out. "Do you know what happens next?"
Harvey hinted, "I think this is where I get to kiss the bride?"
"Kiss away!"
"With pleasure!" Harvey pulled Donna in for their long overdue kiss. With her in his arms, the rest of the world melted away and all he could focus on was her soft, sweet lips. Life felt amazing. No, Donna felt amazing. He could even feel her smiling before she gently pushed him away.
"Harvey, later. We have company."
Damn it. Literally, a company of lawyers.
Harvey gave her a chaste kiss on her cheek before stepping back. "I got carried away." Feeling awkward for that public display, his senses vaguely registered the applause and cheers surrounding them.
Louis nudged Harvey on the shoulder. "I call dibs. Your first baby's name is Louis."
"Never," Harvey declined. He flinched at the thought of his imaginary son demanding to go mudding.
"Oh well. It was worth a try." Louis gave both Donna and Harvey congratulatory bear hugs before taking off to shoo the uninvited guests. "Scram, everyone. Get your asses back to work! We're a serious law firm with real cases. We don't pay you to gawk and swoon at office romance."
With a wide grin, Mike drew Harvey and Donna in for a warm embrace. "I am so happy! I thought I'd have to attend a wedding with you two reciting vows from a wheelchair. Given the dead slug pace your relationship was advancing, Rachel and I predicted that you'd both tie the knot at 87. And one more thing, next time…please spare us the sexual tension and get a room!" Before the couple could scold him, Mike scurried away and shouted, "I'm getting out of here! Darvey for life!"
Jessica stepped forward last. "Congratulations! And Donna? If this reckless jerk gives you any trouble, you let me know."
Donna initiated the hug this time, thanking Jessica for her blessing.
"I'm so glad you have my back, Jessica." Harvey feigned his hurt. "Is it okay if this jerk gets a hug too?"
Jessica wrapped her arms around Harvey's shoulders. "Took you long enough! I don't want to see your faces at work for at least three weeks. Consider it my wedding gift. Now, get the hell out of here. Remember, three weeks! If you come back before, I'll have you arrested for trespassing."
DARING YOU, DARING ME
While waiting for the elevator, Harvey took Donna's hands in his once more. That was when he felt it - the paper clip - grating against his skin.
"Donna, I owe you a ring. A proper wedding."
Donna shook her head. "Minus Harold's stuttering and my sorry excuse for a vow - which I will make up for somehow - I thought the wedding was perfect. To have it here, where we spend most of our time together, in front of the people we love...I don't need anything else. Although I wish my father could have seen it."
Father. Harvey scolded himself. Between wanting to win and later, wanting Donna, he'd brashly thrown all the etiquettes aside.
"I'm sorry, Donna. I'll talk to your father and ask for his permission. And you can plan your dream wedding and reception. However you want it."
"You'll talk to my father…but only as my husband."
"Husband," Harvey repeated.
"Yes, husband. We'll make our marriage official, but I don't want another wedding. You, Harvey...you're all I want."
"I love you, Donna." She turned uncharacteristically bashful at his declaration. Without thought, Harvey grazed her cheek with his thumb, an attempt to brush the shyness away. It felt surreal, knowing from now on, he could do this anytime. That he didn't need to hold back his impulses to touch her, hug her, kiss her. To love her. "Are you not going to say it back?"
"Say what back?" Her evasion was met with Harvey's contented smile. He waited patiently for her to say something, and she eventually caved. She leaned forward and rested her forehead against his chest. Feeling his arms wrapped around her waist, she allowed herself to reveal what she'd kept inside all these years.
"You know I love you, Harvey."
"Hey! That's my line."
"Is it?"
"Yes." He gently propped her chin up, catching her eyes. "But you say it so much better."
"I can't believe we just got married."
"Believe it. I am the city's best closer. That includes closing proposals."
"Let's see how you close me on our wedding night."
"You've sampled me before, and I didn't hear any complaints then. As a matter of fact, I recall a very demanding and passionate woman screaming my name-"
"Hush! That was years ago. I wouldn't want you to throw your back just to prove yourself," Donna interrupted before he could elaborate how she'd given herself to him so completely that night.
Harvey waited till they made it inside the elevator before giving Donna a thorough kiss - as thorough as a short ride down the building allowed anyway. No matter, Harvey thought. They had a lifetime ahead of them, and he planned to make everyday count. As soon as the doors slid open, Harvey led them through the lobby towards Ray's car. Still hazy from the mind-blowing kiss, Donna trailed along on auto-pilot mode.
Harvey teased, whispering close to her ear, "I believe I'll have no problem closing you."
"Oh, please. That kiss in the elevator? I can do better," Donna countered. "Don't oversell yourself. It's safer to set low expectations so I won't be disappointed with reality."
"Ouch." Harvey guided her over to a hidden corner for some privacy. He took notice of her half-dazed movements, the dilated pupils, the swollen lips, and the rosy tinged cheeks. She was obviously affected, despite her casual words. He held her gaze as he slowly inched closer until their lips barely touched. "Need I remind you that the last time you challenged me, we ended up getting married. You have no idea what you just signed up for."
"Is that a dare?"
"It's a promise." Harvey smiled before sealing the words with a kiss.
"Can I get that in writing, Mr. Specter?"
"You can get that in whipped cream, Mrs. Specter."
Courtesy Matters: I own the two paperclips and expect Harvey and Donna to return them after their Honeymoon. They're currently dancing under the stars.
A/N: Aside from thinking 'what did I just read', do you feel like 1) proposing to someone or 2) throwing things at me? For #1, say 'Marry Me' to the stranger beside you and see how he/she reacts. For #2, please pick soft objects. Ready? Throw!
Thank you so much for reading. To quote Donna, the 'lines (between TV, reality, fic, and seasons) are as blurry as lines can get' in this - a deliberate effort on my part. If it was too 'out there', I apologize. I have nothing but love and respect for the show, the cast, and this fandom (*grateful). I hope it was able to make you smile for a bit though. Okay, back to working on my other stories!