The Meaning of Equivalent Exchange

by BlueJayWalker10

Now that Edward has had his limbs replaced and he is ready to go, he and Alphonse leave to Central to take the State Alchemy Exam. On the train to Central, Edward hears about a bizzare power near the ruins of Xerxes. At the time, he disregards the information- But years later, after the Liore fail, he remembers, and decides to investigate. Can it return what they have lost?

1. The Fullmetal Fool

Chapter 1

The Fullmetal Fool

Resembool, Amestris, 1912, Edward's POV

Humankind cannot gain anything without giving something in return. To obtain, something of equal value must be lost.

That is Alchemy's first law of Equivalent Exchange.

In those days, we really believed, that to be the world's one, and only, truth.

-Alphonse Elric

Alchemy. The world's ultimate science. The one thing we thought could do anything. Even bring back the dead.

But it can't.

That night, Alphonse and I made the biggest mistake of our lives.

"All right, Al. Do we have all the ingredients?" I said, preparing the transmutation circle.

My younger brother, Alphonse, began to look through our components while looking at a list that he held in his hand, muttering their as he checked each one carefully. "Water, ammonia, salt, saltpeter, phosphorus. . . . Yeah, brother! They're all here," he said.

I stood up, brushing the chalk of my hands and on to my pants. "Then let's do it." I began to carefully add them all into a large bucket that I had placed into the center of the circle.

"Edward. . . What about Equivalent Exchange? We have the body, but-but what about Mom's soul?" Al asked.

I took out a pocket knife and flicked it open. "Hold out your hand, Alphonse," I said softly as I held out my own.

Al held out his hand, and I cut the tip of his finger along with the tip of mine. "A drop of our blood; a drop of our souls, which came from her blood; her soul." I looked at Al. "That's a fair trade." We turned our hands over and let the blood drip into the mixture. "Ready?" He gave me a confident smile and nodded.

I took a deep, shaky breath, and knelt down in front of the circle. Al knelt beside me.

We placed our hands on the transmutation circle. It began to give off a glorious golden glow. Excitement flowed through me. We could see Mom again! But something felt very wrong.

Now, how do I explain this?

To use Alchemy, you need a transmutation circle. Also, the components of the object you're trying to create need to be the same or similar to the original object. That's where the law of Equivalent Exchange comes into play. But in order to use the transmutation circle and the components of whatever you're using, you need to like. . . . Hmm. . . How do I put this. . . . It's kind of like a natural reflex to Amestrians. It might different for Cretans or Xingeese or Drachmans, I really don't know. But you need to like, er, transfer Alchemic Energy to the circle. Like picture some of your energy, which is Alchemic Energy, flowing into the circle to power it. While you feel your energy flowing into it, you can also sort of feel the reaction; like positive or negative energy. If it feels right or wrong.

That night, it felt very wrong.

The golden glow turned a very dark shade of purplish black.

The transmutation circle opened up into a large eye.

"Brother!" Alphonse's alarmed voice shook me out of my shocked state. I looked to my left at the horrific sight and cried out.

Alphonse, my brother, the only family I had left was being broken down with Alchemy and brought into the eye with black hands, right before my eyes.

"Alphonse!" I shouted. I reached for his hand, but I was unable to grasp it.

"Edward!" He jumped forward, struggling against against the hands, in one desperate attempt to grasp my hand.

Suddenly, as if a switch was thrown, I was pulled into a bright white void, with nothing but a large, gray, stone gate with the eye carved into it in front of me.

"What is this. . . ?" I muttered.

The door opened and I was sucked inside.

After that, everything was kind of a blur. I remember feeling like everything in the world was in there. I remember thousands- No, millions, of the little hands all over me, tugging at me. Where am- What is this place? I thought.

I looked around for a moment and saw something. That's it! The one thing we're missing! The secret to Human Transmutation! I tried to get at it.

A few moments later, I was outside the gate again. And this time, there was a person there with me.

He was completely white, with sort of a black blotchy outline, so he was barely visible.

I pounded on the door. "Hey! Let me back in there! One more look! The secret to it is in there, I know it!" I screamed.

"Well, you know, little Alchemist, you can only go in there once. One time per person," the figure behind me said.

I turned around and looked at him. "What are you?" I asked.

"I am known as God, or as the earth. I am known as Truth. I am all; I am none. But most importantly, I am you," the creature said. "And there is a law to follow. . . ."

I felt a weird thing on my left leg and looked at it. I stared in dread as the black hands I had seen within the gate taking it apart, bringing it back into the gate.

Then the pain began to register. I was brought back to our father's lab, without my leg. I was sobbing and crying out for Alphonse. Then I saw the decrepit scene that was the Alchemy Laboratory.

The two sets of armor that my father, Hohenheim had left behind were knocked over. The research papers that had been kept ever so tidily on his desk were strewn all over the place. Alphonse's clothing lay neatly out on the floor beside me. My blood was splashing everywhere as I screamed.

"This. . . This. . . W-w-wasn't supp-p-osed to h-h-h happen! Th-this isn't what-what we wanted!" I shrieked.

"Bleeeaaaaaa. . . . . ." a faint, breathy, scratchy voice groaned. I looked up and saw a pale hand rise into view above the smoke.

I almost smiled. "Mom?"

Then I saw the rest of it. It was a gruesome sight. The hand was the only thing about it that looked even remotely like my mother. The rest of the body was all bent out of shape. It was a skin bag with bones inside it, but the bones weren't even placed properly. It had glowing purple eyes and light chestnut hair. It reached out to me.

I began to wail like a two year old who needed a nap and had a cookie taken from them. But I didn't care. My twelve year old dignity didn't matter to me at that very moment. I turned away from the morbid sight and tried to ignore the creature that we had created.

I dragged myself over to one of the sets of armor that had tumbled to the floor.

"Give him back to me! Alphonse!" I sobbed. "Take my arm, my leg, my heart, anything dammit! JUST GIVE HIM BACK TO ME!" I screeched at the top of my lungs, using my blood to draw a transmutation circle inside the armor. Using the circle, I managed to bind Alphonse's soul to the armor. I lost my arm to the hands for that. Why? I thought. Why do they want my arm too?

Equivalent Exchange, Little Alchemist. . . . the creature's voice echoed in my head. Your arm for his soul. A fair trade, don't you think? You were lucky. His soul was barely lost before you pulled it back.

After that, I blacked out.

Resembool, Amestris, 1912, Alphonse's POV

I awoke, feeling nothing. I groaned and looked to the side- And saw the grisly sight that was my brother. He was unconscious in a pool of his own blood, his left leg and right arm both stumps. "Edward!" I cried, scrambling to my feet. My body. . . Why can't I feel anything? Why am I so big? I looked at my hands. No. .

I was an empty suit of armor.

No time to dwell on it now! I thought, scooping Ed into my arms. I have to get him help! I ran out of Hohenheim's Alchemy Laboratory, out of the house. I ran through the pounding rain to the Rockbell's home, hoping that it wasn't too late for Ed.

I collapsed at the front door and pounded on it. Pinako answered the door. Her pipe fell to the floor when she saw Edward.

"Please. . . . Help him!" I cried, sobbing. I bowed my head. "Please. . ."

"Winry, come quickly!" Pinako called. She looked at me. "Bring him inside." She pointed to the bed that they used while attaching the ports for automail.

"Right!" I stood up and carried him to the bed, setting him on it gently.

Pinako and Winry got to work on taking care of his wounds.

Winry stopped for a moment, then turned around and looked at me. "Alphonse. . . . Is that you?"

Resembool, Amestris, 1912, Edward's POV

When I began to regain consciousness, I heard Pinako talking with a man.

". . . . perform human transmutation and survive. . ." the man was saying. "Well, their father just dropped on my priority list," he said. "When he wakes up, tell him that Lieutenant Colonel Roy Mustang dropped by, and to pay me a visit sometime." I heard footsteps that I assumed were his walk out of the room. The door closed.

Pinako muttered something about State Alchemist Dogs of the Military and not telling me about Mustang.

I groaned and tried to sit up, but toppled over. Pinako walked over to me.

"Now Ed, don't push yourself. You've lost a lot of blood and you're still recovering," she said. "You gave us quite the scare."

I looked at the stump that was my arm, covered in tight, bloody bandages. I assumed my leg looked the same. I let my head go limp and drop back onto the pillow, releasing a sigh of defeat as I drifted back into oblivion.

When I awoke again, it was Winry waking me up, trying to get me to eat. "Come on, Edward!" she was saying. "You need to eat to keep your strength up!"

Pinako walked into the room. "Edward, I came in here to tell you, if you wanted to be-" she began.

"Who is Mustang?" I interrupted, taking a bite of food.

She sighed. "I wondered if you were awake for that talk," she said. "He's a State Alchemist." Pinako said the words State Alchemist as if they were cursed. "He's also a friend of your father's."

"What? I have to go to him!" I said, suddenly invigorated.

"No in that condition you're not. You can't even stand on your own, much less perform Alchemy!" Pinako said. "As I was saying before you interrupted, I wanted to know: Do you want to be fitted with automail?" she asked.

I opened my mouth to say yes, of I do! But my voice died in my throat as I remembered a procedure that Pinako and Winry had done a few years ago, attaching automail to a hardened war veteran - a decorated war hero, no less - who had come back from battle and had lost his leg. I had to sit outside, of course, but I could hear him just fine.

Screaming like a child.

I shook of the memory and my fear. Alphonse had to go through worse, and he can't live like a normal human anymore! I thought.

"Yes, Aunt Pinako. I want to be fitted with automail," I said confidently.

"Well then, Winry and I better get started!" Pinako left the room.

Resembool, Amestris, 1912; Two weeks after the incident, Edward's POV

I grunted loudly as Winry and Pinako continued to attach all my nerves to the automail ports, trying to resist thrashing around. My eyes were shut tight and my teeth clamped shut - And I was in a lot of pain.

I yelped as yet another nerve was connected.

"Just bare with me, Ed!" Winry said, trying to soothe me.

"You're a strong one, Ed. . ." Pinako muttered. "You know, it's okay to show pain."

"This is nothing. Nothing compared to what I put Alphonse through! I'm his older brother, and I'm supposed to protect him! But I put him in that body! Now he can't eat, he can't sleep, he can't feel warmth or cold, I'm his older brother and I did that do him! " I cried. "G-ah!" Another few nerves were connected.

"We're almost done, Edward, so just hold on," Pinako told me reassuredly.

I bit my lip as the last few nerves were connected, making it bleed. Once they were finished, I finally loosened up and felt myself be carried over to a recovery bed.

"You did a good job Ed- Most people are jerking around and making it difficult to attach the nerves, making the job sloppy. And most of the time we need to tie kids down in the middle of the procedure; they're thrashing too much," Pinako said.

"We'll attach the automail itself tomorrow," Winry said.

That was the last thing I remember before drifting off into a dreamless sleep.

"Ed. . ." somebody was shaking me. "Ed!" the next shake was a little stronger.

"I'll wake him up, Grandma," I heard Winry say.

The back of my head exploded in pain as Winry chucked a wrench at it. I fell out of the bed and hit my head again on the floor, making it hurt more.

"What's your problem, Winry?!" I yelled. "I was sleeping! And I'm in enough freaking pain as it is, gearhead!" I jumped to my foot and balanced myself using the bed for a support.

"So? Just because you're in pain doesn't mean you're allowed to sleep in all day!" Winry yelled back.

"Settle down, you two," Pinako intervened. "Edward, we're going to connect your automail now." She pulled a rolling table over, on it, a few tools and my automail arm and leg.

I closed my eyes and grit my teeth. I knew that this was going to hurt.

Pinako and Winry put the limbs in. Now all that was needed was to screw them in and connect the nerves.

"All right Ed," Winry said.

Pinako and Winry counted down together. "One, two. . ."

I gripped the couch tightly and hoped three would never come.

"Three!"

"B-Graah! Son of a-" I felt the limbs pop into place and an enormous wave of pain flow through my nerves. But it stopped almost immediately stopped and all that was left was a dull sort of throbbing.

"See, that wasn't so bad, was it?" Pinako said.