Well, I think I should be sleeping. This can't be healthy.

My first fic for this amazing manga. I cried so much the first time i read it and I almost died the second, so here is my penance for breaking my heart again with falling in love with Satsuki.

Keep in mind that english isn't my first language. It's spanish. So, any mistake you see or anything bad at all I'm sorry. I'll try to improve.

Words

What if I don't lie?, he asked himself while he traced the silent tears rolling down her cheeks with his eyes. He wanted to do so many things, say so many others, but above all he didn't want to lie this only time. He just couldn't say those hurting words, not at her face and not even when Yukichi has threatened him if he didn't end it right now.

Do you love me?, she had said with her cute voice breaking in the wrong places, those damn tears begging him to clean them away, those cracked lips wanting to be kissed. She looked so sad, so different from that cheerful girl from before all of this started, that he felt guilt creeping in his veins and asking him to lie.

But he didn't want to. She was probably the only true love he had in his twenty-four years of life. Childhood crush and some girlfriend in high school and college, is true, but this was way more heavy than that. His need to keep her despite all the trouble was a sign of what his heart really wanted right now.

Just say the damn word, dammit! He thought, but his mouth wasn't moving. He knew his voice wouldn't come easily and a lie wasn't believable enough if you stutter even a little bit.

He closed his eyes and his best friend face appeared behind his eyelids, taunting him, furious eyes that looked disappointed in him. Disgust written all over it. He felt disgusted with himself.

Why?, he thought. Why her? Why me? Why now!

He opened his orbs and as he watched her beautiful blue eyes dull and become gray with sadness, he knew he couldn't do it. Not now, not ever.

"I love you."

Some spark came back to her eyes and he almost heard her heart skip a beat. She was so pure and innocent, so full of youth. He felt even more disgusted by saying these words now. She had her whole life ahead, years of school trips, crushes, dates and broken hearts that would heal eventually. She wasn't ready for his love, his feelings.

But selfishly, he said those stupid words again.

"I love you, Suzume."

He hadn't realized that he was crying too.