Disclaimer: All characters belong to Yumi Hotta + Takeshi Obata. Except for Kenji who comes later. But he's not incredibly important
Warnings: Spoilers for the entire series
eternity
by The Honorable Arik Novak
Ch 1: Eternal Rivals—Thee and Me Maybe that Meijin title I've held for five years makes me think that! That has nothing to do with speed, and I'll still win and you'll pay for my hard-earned ramen. Ha, Over my dead body!
Toya, what makes you think you think you could ever beat me?
"Damn you, Akira," Hikaru muttered, gazing at the casket made of kaya wood. It was strange, apparently, to ask for such a casket, but the boy's mother thought it more than fitting. Hikaru agreed. The boy looked—not peaceful, but certainly not dead. The mortician had done a wonderful job making Akira look somewhat healthy. A black silk kimono adorned the man's body, and Hikaru just couldn't stand looking at his rival looking so…unresponsive. He reverently took his fan, the same fan bought from the Go Institute so long ago, and placed it in the casket. Losing Akira was just like losing Sai all over again.
"And I promised you I'd tell you about Sai…I promised…"
Akira had been blooming wonderfully and had been Hikaru's only rival, the only man who could help him reach the hand of god. They were the best of the best, the veritable New Wave that took the Go world by storm. People claimed that if anyone could reach the hand of god, it would be one of the two. Even more, people claimed that given the chance, either could trounce the infamous Sai. Of course, Hikaru never gave credence to the latter rumor, but vigorously clung to the former. But the dream was no more. Akira, just barely turning twenty-six, had met with an unfortunate accident on his way out from a ramen shop. Hikaru loved the irony of it all. After all, the young man had only gone there to fetch two bowls of ramen, neither of which was for himself. At the same time, Hikaru had left to buy sushi for the other boy. It had been a dare, a silly dare. To see who could get back to the Go Institute faster. The slowest had to pay for both meals—and admit he was slower than the other. The bet didn't make much sense in hindsight.
Hikaru did not think it would cost Akira's life. He looked around and saw that the driver of the car was at the wake as well, apologizing profusely to Akira's mother. Hikaru was afraid of telling anyone just why Akira had two bowls of ramen as Hikaru had two bento full of sushi. It was impossible to think that two boys could have eaten even half of the food they would have amassed together.
He gave his condolence money, a full ¥40,000. It was the very least he could do, since he had no want for money, and Akira had been closer than a brother. They had discussed death before, back when Akira's father had died of a heart attack. Even retirement could not keep Toya Meijin from the goban, and it seemed the stress led to his death. The two boys always figured Hikaru would die first. Jokingly, Akira would point out that Hikaru only ate ramen and soda, and then Hikaru would say that Akira was already dead because he had no life. They were little humorous conversations, nothing serious. And they continued to joke about that and other things.
Hikaru's hair was long, brushing the middle of his back though securely tied with an elastic band. Akira had mentioned several times that Hikaru's new hairstyle was too radical for a go player, even more so because of his blonde bangs, and teased that now Hikaru looked more like a girl than the other boy. Ever since Akira's death, he hadn't re-dyed his bangs, so that his roots were showing quite clearly. But memories of Akira ached, and he brushed them away when he saw the boy's mother walking toward him.
"My condolences, Toya-san," he said to the weary woman. She hiccoughed and sniffed and placed a gloved hand on Hikaru's shoulder.
"I know how close you were to my Akira," sniff, "And I can only thank you for being such a good friend to him." Hikaru wiggled uneasily, trying not to make his awkwardness apparent. But the woman had a strong grip and continued, "You should already know that Akira never had very many good friends, and you were probably the first he ever let himself get close to. Thank you, Shindo-kun." Hikaru nodded and slipped away easily as one of the Go pros sidled up to the woman to tell her how amazing Toya was.
Hikaru left early. Toya-san had him sitting toward the front with the family during the ceremony, but it served only to make him uncomfortable. He had been the second person to go to the incense urn, right after the man's mother. He was followed by Akira's wife and child. It was strange, unheard of in a traditional family. People who had not really known Akira but had known Koyo wondered how the man with long hair and blonde bangs had the audacity to take such an honored place. Toya-san even asked him to keep vigil with her for the rest of the night, but the idea was unthinkable. He and Akira had been rivals, nothing more. Nothing more.
That's what he told himself hours later as he stared at his computer screen filled with old kifu. So many games, so close to the hand of god! And Akira was gone, just like Sai, and the Hand of God would forever stay away from the realm of mortals.
He felt old and weary, even though his body was at its peak. He was slumped in his leather chair, facing an online goban. He denied the numerous requests to play Sai, finding himself much too preoccupied with thinking about Akira. Why he even logged on as Sai in the first place, he didn't know. And he couldn't go to the funeral tomorrow because non-family members just didn't go to both the wake and the funeral. Toya-san had practically begged him to attend, but picking the bones of his long-time rival with chopsticks—it didn't seem right at all. He didn't know how long he had been staring at the screen when he heard a knock on his door. Slowly, with the strength and vigor of an old man on his deathbed, Hikaru walked to the door. He unlocked it without even caring who it was.
And there, on his doorstep, were two students from the Institute. They were both pros and had been pros for a year or two. Hikaru should know—he and Akira trained them personally.
"Shindo Kisei," a boy said quietly, nervously. "We know how much you respected Toya Honinbo. My condolences." Hikaru thought the boy would be the one to worry about. After all, Akira had been the boy's main mentor for the past two years.
"We really miss him. We decided we couldn't leave you alone tonight, not since you're going through such a hard time, Sensei," his friend, a young girl, added. She was Hikaru's student. An astute young lady who reminded Hikaru of Akira when he had been her age.
"Rui, Oka," Hikaru started with hesitation. He did not want the company, but something told him that he would need the support. So he sighed and opened his door wider. "Alright. Do your parents know you're here?"
The girl, Oka, grinned. "Nope! But I left a note, so my mom will know. And Rui's gonna call his mom now to let her know we're here."
Indeed, the young man had a phone to his ear and was quickly talking in Chinese. Hikaru caught some words, "Go," and "teacher," being the few he knew in Chinese from trips to the country. "Xie Xie, Mama. Bai-bai."
"She sends her condolences. Sensei," Rui started, "Really, we just want to make sure that you're going to be fine. So we brought a goban!"
Hikaru quirked a tiny smile. "I already have a goban. Most pros do, you know."
"But you need two to play blind multiple games!"
Hikaru grinned a bit wider. "Of course, how could I be so blind?"
"Shindooooooooooooooooooooooo!" And boom, Waya and Isumi were hovering before his door. "Looks like someone stole our idea," the redhead said, eyeing the kids' goban. Indeed, underneath his own arm was a foldable goban.
"We thought it wouldn't be wise to leave you on your own," Isumi said matter-of-factly.
And the night progressed. His two brightest students, Rui and Oka, twelve and thirteen respectively, were proving to be hard competitors. Hikaru and Toya had both known instantly that the two were perfect rivals. It was fate really, that brought the four together. And they'd had a blast.
After a few intense games, "Oka-chan, how is Akari doing?" Hikaru finally asked. Waya looked up from the goban to watch the conversation.
His student paused in putting the stones away. "She's…mostly fine. Didn't you see her at the funeral? She had baby Aki with her the entire time."
"I wasn't really paying attention. I did talk to Toya-san a bit, though. She didn't speak much with Akari, but I think it was more grief than purposeful avoidance."
"I hope so," Waya interrupted. "Toya-san was always very friendly, but today she felt a little…cold, toward everyone."
Isumi nodded. "And you'd think she would have spent most of her time with her daughter-in-law and granddaughter, seeing as she's barely a month old."
Rui smirked and elbowed his teacher: "Or maybe she talked to you the most since she knew you and Toya-sensei were so close."
Hikaru choked on his soda. "Don't even joke like that, kid!" He laughed. It was a half-forced, weak laugh, but a laugh nonetheless. Eventually, the teenagers grew tired. Waya and Isumi excused themselves after assuring themselves that Hikaru wasn't about to commit suicide or anything. He let Oka take his bed and Rui the couch. Hikaru himself said he would take out a futon, much to his students' objections. But he found he couldn't sleep. He was often tired during the day anyway, so disturbances in sleep weren't surprising to him. He checked the clock, and at around three AM, he left.
By noon, he had spent hours in Innoshima not doing much of anything. He walked around, went to a few museums, and of course visited Shusaku's grave. It only seemed appropriate, since Sai never got a grave of his own. He had always hoped Sai would return. Year after year, he hoped, but each May 5th only heralded an empty existence. But standing in front of the grave, all Hikaru could think about was the lost opportunity. He would never reach the hand of god with Toya Akira now. He had dreamt of the day for so long…maybe it was destined to always be a dream.
And then they each had found an exceptional student. Akira had Rui, and Hikaru had Oka. It was strange how destiny worked. Oka, as an insei, had been a Toya fanatic but changed her mind as soon as she played a game against Hikaru. Rui had been an avid Shindo fan as an insei, but after playing Akira once, decided that Toya was the better player of the two. Although he was still inclined toward Hikaru, he recognized that Akira was amazing as well. So resentfully, Rui took Akira as his teacher and mentor. And loved it. At some point, Hikaru wasn't sure when, Akari started dating Akira, and nine months after marriage, had a healthy daughter, Aki. Hikaru wondered at their name choices, but balked when he heard that the alternative was Akifumi—nevermind that it was a boy's name, Toya-san wanted to retain the tradition of 'bright' names.
Everything had seemed so perfect. Everything had been laid out, and Hikaru had been prepared to keep living life pursuing the Hand of God. Maybe he would even settle down with a girl once he had everything worked out. But life didn't work that way, at least not for him or his rival. Akira…all he could think about was Toya Akira and his meaningless death. Why? Hikaru found himself asking again. Why, Akira?
"Dammit, Akira, we were so close! Why did you leave?"
Hikaru lowered himself onto a park bench. Withdrawing a scrap of paper and a pen, he quickly penned down a few words, a poem of sorts. They didn't mean much, since Hikaru was never much of a writer. His eyes scanned the shoddy work and he quickly pocketed it. He chuckled: such randomness was too strange for the daylight.
He really didn't want to go back to Tokyo, where memories of Akira lurked in every shadow. Here, he was away from everything. His bench was uncomfortable, but Hikaru was tired. The day seemed like a complete waste, a complete waste of time. The sun was already setting…he could just take a nap…and then maybe he would get a hotel room…later. He didn't really want to sleep—his sleep apnea caused problems more often than not. But…so tired.
Hikaru laughed at himself as he yawned. Of the two, Hikaru always thought he would be the one to die before Akira. After all, his family had a history of high blood pressure, high cholesterol, not to mention that Hikaru ate ramen every time the opportunity showed itself. Of the two, Hikaru was the more reckless—why had Akira gone first? It wasn't fair! They were supposed to be eternal rivals! Why would Akira leave him like this?
The Hand of God was so close, Hikaru could sense it. He had seen his rival's fingers glow before; it was not a hallucination. Conversely, he had heard from colleagues and friends that his own fingers glowed…it was strange, but Hikaru liked to believe it. That both he and Akira were so very, very close—
He searches only for the Hand of God. He looked down fondly at his friend, his rival. He thinks only of his family, friends, and Go. He would not have him any other way.
Not for your friendship or rivalry?
It is…important to him, but Sai is even more important. He had long ago resigned himself to third place in Hikaru's heart and mind, right after Sai, whoever he was, and Go.
He does not know Sai.
His consternation grew. Oh, but he does! He told me! Hikaru had told him a bit about Sai, just a little. And from those few words, he had been able to understand the entire scope of the man's relationship.
He knows of Sai. He does not know Sai—and Time needs to be straightened. Give the boy strength, Toya Akira. He will play the perfect game of Go.
He will...reach the Hand of God?
It is his destiny to see the Divine Move.
"What is wrong with thee?" a strange voice asked and prodded his cheek.
"What the hell, go away," Hikaru muttered. What was this? Who was poking him? Wait, last he knew, he was in Innoshima…on a bench. But he felt wind on his face and bright sunlight through his eyelids. Was it morning already?
He snapped up and looked around. Was he in Kyoto or something? Some other old city? He was in a large beautifully decorated room, like a scene from an NHK drama. The sliding doors were fully open, boasting a lush oriental garden. What was this? A cruel prank to dump him in some kind of Heian reenactment? "What am I doing here?"
"That is what I would like to know," a tall man said. He was dressed as Sai would have, with the silk clothes and funny hat…it certainly seemed to be Heian. His hair was long, also like Sai, but gently flowing freely with the wind instead of tied low.
"Who're you?" Hikaru asked rudely, rubbing the back of his head. He really had a bad headache. And today was Akira's funeral.
"What of thine, invader?" the man returned, looking a bit paranoid. Maybe Hikaru accidently sleepwalked into an insane asylum.
"I'm Hikaru," he said hesitantly. Then annoyed, he asked, "Again, who the hell are you?"
"Fujiwara no Sai."
"Fujiwara no Sai?" Hikaru scoffed. "I knew a guy named Sai who dressed exactly as you are, but he's much cooler." What was this guy thinking?
"I protest that! Look aloft, my friend," the man said, withdrawing a familiar-looking fan and snapping it open in a disdainful gesture, "and go back to thine home before the emperor finds thee and beheads thee for thine insolence!"
"You're really into this, aren't you? Yeah, yeah, I'm leaving." Weird nut jobs. Hikaru snorted and walked past the section of the garden he had already seen, only to gaze in awe at the scene before him. "What in kami's name…?" It was amazing! As far as he could see, Heian reenactment! But Hikaru wasn't stupid enough to imagine that any one company would create such accurate and huge scenes, but he wasn't stupid enough to imagine that he had gone back in time for no reason at all…right?
"Well? Leave, ungrateful brute!" the other man sniffed.
"You're Fujiwara no Sai?" Hikaru jerkily slid the door closed again and tried to catch his breath.
The man scoffed again. "Yes, I have already told thee. I am the Go tutor to the emperor. Wherefore?"
"You're Sai."
"We address not each by our given names—" and with an embarrassed flush to his cheeks, the other man realized, "Oh, how rude of me. Thy name?"
"Sh-Shimamura Hikaru. And You're Fujiwara Sai."
"Fujiwara no Sai. Fujiwarasai would be a very long name. What brings thee hither? Thou art here for a reason."
Hikaru did not know what to say. Here was Sai, the man he had ignored, then befriended, then idolized. "You're Sai." Hikaru realized that his eyes were tearing up when the other man leant forward to look at him.
"Have I done something to offend thee, Shimamura-san?" Oh, the name sounded so wrong on the man's lips! He wished Sai would just talk to him like his Sai had, call him Hikaru!
"No, not at all!" the idea that Sai had done anything wrong was impossible! "Fujiwara-san," he said, tripping over the title. It was strange calling his friend by his last name. "Play a game of Go with me."
"Go?" the man's eyes flashed dangerously and a feral grin grew upon his face. "Why Shimamura-san, thou shouldst have said that earlier. Come, sit thee down!"
Notes: Any and all research is from either Wikipedia or Sensei's Library. --awesome site!