Jade.

It was dark, only because I kept yelling at the doctors to turn the lights off. I didn't want it to be light; I didn't want to see myself and the damage that had been done. It was quiet too, so damn silent my own thoughts appeared to scream at me rather than whisper. I could hear the distant footsteps of them, the people that could carry on with the knowledge of what had happened to me, to us, and still be quite happy to carry on with their perfect lives. Then there was me, who could stay awake all night realising how my life would never return to the same normal their stupid lives were because this had ruined every chance of that ever happening.

There were the flashbacks rearing their ugly heads when I tried to sleep, they haunted my nightmares like ghosts of the past. Her face danced across my dreams, laughing carelessly and enjoying every light footstep, each left a heavy dint in my sanity. It was her eyes, the mocking way they were so happy and carefree. They killed me a little inside, not that there was much left alive anymore. There were gravestones littered around the front yard of my mind. The newest one belonging to her, her name in pretty italics like she'd always wanted.

I was curled up on the floor in the back corner of the hospital room. I'd crawled off the bed after the last doctor had made an appearance. The bed was more like an interrogation table. They kept asking questions. A question followed by another and another. There were no answers to be given. I didn't know what had happened, not clearly enough to be of any real help. Everyone seemed to want to know: the police, my mom, her parents, Beck, the rest of the group. They all had questions which followed the same path and ended up at the same dead end each time. Still, they pressed me for answers. I was beginning to feel like an apple in a juice press. I was going crazy enough to use stupid comparisons like that.

Why can't they understand that I don't know what happened to her nor do I know where she is? If I did, I'd be running there this very moment. I don't care about the state I'm in, if I could save her, I would. I wouldn't give a second thought about it.

And another thing, I wish they'd stop telling me not to worry or move because of 'my condition'. Next, they'll stop me breathing. They make it sound like I've got the bubonic plague or something referring to it as 'my condition' all of the time. Why can't they form words other than those two that they utter in disgust then they try to hide their disapproval from the poor crazy girl? I'm not crazy; I did hear her screams as someone dragged my unconscious body across the forest floor. They've tried to tell me that I created the image in my mind to comfort myself that I was with her until the very end and that a barmaid found me in the car park of some rural bar when they snatched her instead. But why would they want her? I'm the one that's in trouble.

Someone walked in, then knelt down beside me.

"Babe, it's me, Beck."

I didn't move. I didn't want to.

"You shouldn't be on the floor, not in your condition," André said.

I didn't look at him or Beck; I simply turned further away from them. "Shut up."

"Jade, please just get back into the bed," Beck was literally begging me now; I could hear it in his voice. By now, I would have thought he'd realise I wasn't moving after a week here.

I didn't even volunteer an answer for him.

He sighed, replacing the air with a long inhalation. "If you want to be like that then I'm giving up with asking for you to do it."

Beck's arms slipped under my back, cradling me to his chest. I wanted to shout at him, get him away from me. He shouldn't see me in this way, broken and helpless. I knew I shouldn't be so harsh on him but he shouldn't keep coming back to see the disaster his girlfriend had become.

He placed me onto the bed. He pulled the covers over my bare legs then slipped the oxygen mask back onto my face and placed the heart rate clip back onto my finger. "That's better."

I couldn't look him in the eye, I was guilty somehow. All those hours alone, I'd finally connected the dots of how it was my entire fault. I should have told her we weren't going shopping that day, made some silly excuse to stay home and watch Cinderella or whatever the film of the month is.

André placed some magazines at the side of my bed. "I asked your mom if you had any favourites and got the new editions. I bought some for Tori too but they're discharging her soon."

"Thanks," I replied quietly. "Is she okay?"

André didn't look at me. I knew why. "She's improved since last week. Just a few broken ribs and some scratches, that's all."

I nodded lightly. "That's good."

"I know you haven't been sleeping and that the doctors can't give you anything so I tried to find some herbal medicines in my grandmother's old books and there's this herb which can make you fall to sleep –"

Beck shot a look at André as if he couldn't believe how much junk he was coming out with. The black circles under his eyes stood out in the small amount of banished light invading my room. "Jade, we need to know what happened. The officers really need to talk to you again but you keep refusing and the doctors say the stress isn't good for the ba..."

I shook my head, covering my ears and shutting my eyes tightly. I brought my legs closely to my chest, resting my forehead on my knees.

She couldn't barge her way into my mind, not now.

"Jade? Are you okay?"

Beck's voice was several miles away from me, repeating that question in hope I'd respond to one of his pleas. He sounded so far above the water, I couldn't hear him anymore.

That's when she began singing again as they drove towards the retail park on the outskirts of the city.

-Flashback-

"Jadey, turn the radio up please?" Cat laughed, singing along to some damn awful song I hadn't heard before. It was a hot day; I remember the sun blazing down on the city from the road. It was the last hot day of the year before the breeze became a harsh, cold wind that raged passed my hospital window every night.

"No."

"Please? I like this song!" She begged, her hands clasped together.

Tori laughed from the backseat.

"What's so funny, Vega?" I spat as she creased herself laughing.

Tori stopped, poking her head between the seats. "Nothing at all, Jade."

"You should have agreed to let Tori drive or let Beck take us in his truck," Cat started.

"I'm fully capable of driving, thanks," I snapped back, slamming my foot onto the pedal. "Just because they would have turned the radio up, they're soft touches. You just bat your eyelashes at them, Cat, and they bow down to your every request."

Cat glanced down, a knowing shame forming on her lips. "It's not my fault."

"Trina wanted to come with us, shopping at the retail park," Tori shrugged, leaning back into her seat.

I raised an eyebrow at Tori in the rear view mirror. "And why would she want to do that?"

"She thinks you could be different now you're… you know," Tori gestured to my stomach.

"Knocked up? You can say it you know, Vega. It won't happen to you if you use the words relating to it either," I replied putting my shades on then replacing my hand on the steering wheel.

Tori blushed, muttering something I couldn't quite hear about my sarcasm and how it hadn't improved despite Trina's beliefs.

Cat began singing again, I groaned. It was the same song again for the fifth time since we'd left my house. Why the hell did I let her bring her own CD for the ride?

"Change the song, Cat! If I hear this song one more time, I will throw the disc out of the window without a second thought. "

"But Robbie made it me for my birthday!" She argued back, her petite arms crossed themselves fiercely.

I threw her one of my signature glares.

She sighed, pressing the button for the next song. It happened to be the song Robbie had written for her after the blonde fanatic freak dumped her. I had to admit, it was a cute song.

I just wish her voice singing the overly sweet lyrics wouldn't echo in my head like my own personal show in the back of my mind. It was always waiting to accompany the sorry flashbacks.

The soundtrack to my misery.

-End-

"Jade, please just answer me," Beck appealed to me, shaking my shoulders gently.

André was gone. It was just me and Beck in the box of hospital room.

"She played Robbie's song the entire time we were driving," I whispered as if it would trigger something to start playing it in the room.

Beck sat on the edge of the bed. "She loves that song a little too much."

"Did they find my car?"

"They put it back on your mom's drive," Beck said, stroking my back.

I looked up at him. "Where has Robbie been? I haven't heard you talk about him."

"I haven't really…"

"Don't lie to me, Beck. What difference will it make?"

He sighed, shrugging softly. "He hasn't been doing too well."

"I want you to give him Cat's CD from my car, my way of saying sorry."

"Saying sorry for what? You don't have anything to be sorry for, babe."

I had clumps of my hair tightly in my hands. "I'm a bad person, Beck. I should have let them grab me, not her."

He wrapped his arms around me, kissing the top of my head lightly. "You didn't get a choice."

"I could have saved her."

"No, I don't think any of us could have done," He whispered in my ear. "But she'll be okay; they'll find her in some ice cream parlour somewhere like they found you."

"They didn't find me where she was. They moved me. I was with her, I kept hearing her cry and scream at them about how they'd knocked me out. Then they dragged me through the woods and I can't remember after that."

Beck didn't acknowledge I'd said anything instead he'd stood up. We'd argued about it before, in the seven days I'd been here, we'd argued so much that security kicked him out for upsetting me so much.

Why didn't anyone believe me?

I slowly placed my hands on the bed. "You shouldn't be here."

He took a step back. "What?"

"You shouldn't be here," I repeated.

He tried to sooth me. "You don't mean that, babe."

"I do, name the reason why you're here."

"I love you, isn't that a good enough reason?"

I nodded. "It is but I'm not Jade right now, I'm a messed up version of myself and I don't want you to see it."

"You need support right now, I'm not leaving you."

"I'm fine, I need to get back to being myself," I responded, staring straight ahead.

"But there isn't just you anymore, is there?" Beck looked at me, his gaze burning my face. "I've already lost Cat from this; I'm not losing you as well."

I didn't reply. I just glanced down to what he meant. The ever growing issue with everyone I knew.

"There are two of you and I'm not leaving until the other one tells me to."

"That's ridiculous, it can't talk," I scoffed as André returned with the dreaded doctor.

Beck gave me a small smile. "Now you know how you sound."

And welcome to my new story!

This was planned about half way through Lost in the Butterflies so it's a long time I've been waiting to show you this! (By the votes, it looks like a sequel is very, very likely…)

Anyway, I hope you're going to enjoy this!

Love always,

Chasing Midnight.