Season 1
"Do me a favor; hook this for me?"
Alison's back was a canvas, smooth and unblemished, and Emily's hands shook slightly as she fastened the other girl's bra. She had tried not to stare when Ali casually dropped her towel, instead letting her eyes wander over the blonde's body in brief glances.
The shame she sometimes felt in Alison's presence – for looking, for wanting - was gone, replaced by a slight shimmer of confidence. They had kissed in the library, and surely Alison's actions today were deliberate and inviting?
Summoning her courage, Emily leaned forward, hands gentle on the blonde's shoulders, and ghosted her lips along Ali's neck. For a brief moment, it was perfect.
"What are you doing?"
And suddenly it was a nightmare. Ali's words were sharp and cruel, each one landing like a blow.
Just a kiss.
Boys.
Practice.
The real thing.
And the knock-out punch, trapping Emily in her humiliation when she would have escaped: "Where are you going, you're my ride?"
Emily leaned against the lockers, eyes tightly shut, willing the tears not to fall and embarrass her further. But it was too much. She pushed off the lockers and turned for the exit without looking back. "I'll wait for you outside."
Alison heard the locker room door shut but kept her eyes forward.
She finished dressing, brushed her hair and opened her makeup bag.
The mirror hanging in the back of her locker showed a beautiful girl, even without cosmetics, but she applied them anyway. Appearance is everything, her mother's voice whispered in her head.
Concealer, blush, eye shadow, mascara… Despite the pounding of her heart, the blood racing through her veins (and the skin still tingling where Emily had touched her), Alison performed each step to perfection, with steady hands and clear eyes.
She finished with a soft rose-colored lipstick that complemented her strawberries and cream complexion and looked one last time in the mirror, taking in the overall effect … a beautiful, blonde girl with angelic features ...
Abruptly, she wiped the lipstick from her face and pulled a darker shade from her makeup bag. Bright red, harsh, like blood.
Her hand shook once as she applied it, but she tamed her emotions through sheer will alone, staring at herself in the mirror until all traces of agitation (guilt, regret) were gone. In their place, a smooth, calm (empty, expressionless) mask.
Alison studied her reflection again and lifted her chin at the results. Now it was perfect.
Beautiful, blonde …
"Bitch," she whispered.
Season 7
Emily glanced one last time at her sleeping daughters before tiptoeing out of the nursery. She pulled the door not-quite-closed and smiled at the soft glow of Ariel swimming on the dark walls, courtesy of the special nightlight Alison had ordered.
"Mermaids are good luck for me," she had whispered against Emily's lips after they added it to the nursery. "This one can watch over the girls at night while you're taking care of me."
Emily felt her body flush as she remembered what happened next, and Alison making it clear what taking care of her meant. To this day, whenever they played The Little Mermaid movie for the girls, Emily always blushed, and Alison always laughed.
Shaking off that memory, Emily went to check on her girlfriend's progress in getting ready for a pre-wedding party for Aria and Ezra at the Lost Woods Resort. Emily had dressed earlier and then taken over baby duties while the blonde showered and changed. Twins were overwhelming at first, but they had a system down now.
Emily glanced at her watch; her mom was due soon to stay with the girls overnight.
"Ali," Emily called softly as she entered their bedroom. "You ready?"
"Just about," the answer came from the walk-in closet.
Alison stepped into Emily's sight, hair and makeup perfect, wearing moderate heels. She held the top of her floral halter dress to her chest with one hand.
"Do me a favor; tie this for me?"
The blonde presented her back as Emily stepped forward. She brushed Ali's hair gently over her shoulder and reached for the lower set of ties, where Alison's bra would fasten if she were wearing one. The blonde's back was still smooth and unblemished, the skin only slightly less taut than it once had been.
Emily tied the bow and smiled as she heard Alison absently humming the twins' favorite lullaby under her breath. Forgetting the top tie for the moment, Emily leaned forward, pressing her lips to the blonde's neck at her shoulder and dragging them up to her ear, nipping slightly.
"What are you doing?" Alison turned, slightly breathless and just a little irritated; Emily knew that spot was her ignition switch.
"Sorry," Emily smiled sheepishly. "I just sometimes still can't believe all this, and that I get to do that now."
She looked so very much like her 14-year-old self, Ali's annoyance faded as quickly as it came.
Their eyes met and held, and Ali smiled softly in forgiveness (and apology). When the smile shifted from soft to seductive, she delighted in Emily's quick intake of breath. The brunette had an ignition switch, too.
Alison held Emily captive with the heat of her gaze for several seconds before she moved her hand, letting the top part of her dress fall, exposing her breasts. Maturity and pregnancy had changed her body, but the way Emily looked at her remained the same.
Alison reached forward and trailed her fingers down Emily's forearm.
"I think we've had each other in every room of this house, Em, but if you need a reminder …"
The blonde stepped forward, just close enough for her breasts to brush against Emily's dress. "You can have me anytime, anywhere, any way you want."
Emily's eyes widened and then darkened, and Alison was already planning an apology to Spencer for being late when she heard the very faint sound of the front door closing, signaling the arrival of Pam Fields. Oops, forgot about that.
Alison stepped back and pressed her palm to Emily's chest. "Just not when your mother's in the house."
She smiled apologetically. "Can't have her thinking I'm a bad influence on you."
Emily exhaled a calming breath and nodded; she was tempted to quip "too late," but the truth was, Pam Fields might just be Alison's biggest fan.
When the time had come to tell her mother about the pregnancy, and their relationship, Emily had been prepared to defend Alison. Instead, she was given Pam's blessing, along with an eye-opening account of the last five years and what Alison had endured in the town that judged a teen-ager harsher than most adults. As far as Pam was concerned, Alison had proven herself to be strong and resilient and capable of change. The reservations she once expressed about young Ali were now replaced with respect and admiration for the woman she'd become.
For days afterward, Emily had struggled with the weight of guilt and the desire to change the past, wishing she would have stayed closer to home and involved in Alison's life. Someone should have been there for Ali, and perhaps they might even have found their way together sooner …
But in the end, she knew that kind of "what if" thinking served no one. They were together now, and the two babies sleeping upstairs made all their past regrets and hurts and insecurities worth it.
Alison quirked her lips and turned around, pulling her dress up. Emily tied the top bow and then pressed another kiss to Ali's neck. Her lips lingered, but this time to convey comfort and affection.
Ali turned her head slightly, her cheek brushing the crown of Emily's head.
"Later, I promise," she whispered.