Yup. There are times like these. Times when I want to hit him in his head. Times when I want to slam the book in my hand on his head so hard that it leaves the print behind.
So, what is stopping me?
Well, One - being he is the one who writes my paychecks.
And, Two – as if I could reach his head. The guy is gigantic.
So, what do I do instead, I hide that frown of mine, and smile at him, as he dreamily lounges on my table.
"Kiri? What took you so long?" He chirps, as if I am the sole center of amuse to his universe. God, do I hate that night or what.
"It's Kria. Singhania Sir, Can I ask why you are here?" I try my best to keep that smile plastered to my face.
"Awww. Do I need to have a reason to see my favorite assistant, Kiri?" He cooes to me, god I hate it when he does that.
"I am your only assistant, Sir." I sigh, ofcourse he's gonna have a comeback to this one as well. Why is it illegal to hit your boss on his head?
"But if I had more than one, you'd definitely be my favorite!" He winks, those muddy hazel eyes of his, and just for a short second, I find my breath hiked.
I give up. It's no use fighting with him after all.
"Did you want something Sir?" I ask, dejected, now wanting him out of the cabin so I can mope and curse in silence.
"You know its Rey, not 'Singhania Sir' Kiri. And the French Delegation is coming in tomorrow. Promise me you'll take good care of them. They are such haughty people. Their faces make me blue." He finishes the sentences animatedly.
Of course, he doesn't like them. He wouldn't be caught dead with people like them. It was me who had to batter him into striking a deal with them. What would I not give if once he started thinking about money for god's sake?
"I will, Singhania Sir." I reply curtly, and watch him mumble some curses and leave. Well, he has a right to be mad. He loves me. Moreover, he hasn't even been silent about it. Almost, every single day, from that day, he professes his love to me, only to be shot down.
That day. What had gotten into me? The Vodka? The Tequila? Or The Scotch?
I can't really rememberquite right. All I remember is that it was magical.
He had a business deal to be finalized that night, and I had accompanied him, making sure he didn't screw it up. The people he had been dealing with were just the kind that made him depressed; the grey-suited, senile, old-farts, as he referred them to, and I couldn't afford a backfire regarding this deal, considering it would make multi-crore profits once it was done.
I never would ever say it to his face, but I could always understand why he hated them so much. They judged him mercilessly every time, doubting his every move, every dialogue, as he always convinced them that he was not just some Smart kid who struck a lottery. They always thought he was a brash, impulsive teenager who would sooner or later bomb himself, tanking them with him too.
Why didn't they ever give him a chance? I had thought that night, his strained voice nerving me to great extents.
He isn't a kid, I had wanted to tell them when he shook their hands, firmly, closing in on the deal.
Maybe it wasn't the alcohol that night. Maybe it was something else that led to it.
He had looked so exhausted after all that. I couldn't say no to him for stopping at his favorite pub. It really did define him. Every part of Rey, as if, was etched on those walls. The frivolous paintings, the darts, the trumpets, all of them were so him, that I almost found him melt into it.
How could I have said No to a drink that night. He had just had the most taxing days ever, all thanks to me.
Though it always was the boss who was supposed to slave-drive, I somehow felt the dynamics were always reversed with us.
One... Two... Three... Ten.. Umm.. I really don't remember how many I gulped down that night. All I remember is that I had almost thrashed into his arms.
I remember him faintly murmuring an 'I Love You' to me that night... And then I remember my ears buzzing with warmth. My fingertips tingling with a weird sensation. My toes curling up with intense joy.
I had kissed him, ravishing, branding his lips to my own. Somehow, my need to mark him mine had overridden the perpetual control I usually had around him.
Even though I cannot remember how many drinks I had had, I can remember this part of the night most vividly, as if my senses were on overdrive.
He had literally swept me off my feet, carrying me over his shoulder; I barely could keep my hands off of him in the car ride to his home. I had felt so crazed, finally being able to touch that chiseled torso of his; finally being able to graze those muscular arms. How I had left marks all over him. Sigh.
As soon as we had climbed in the elevator to his place, our lips had joined again. But he had kissed me so differently than how I had. His kiss... His kiss felt as she was his personal goddess. Like he was holding her up on some high pedestal reverently. As if I was the most prized possession he had.
Our lips had melted together so beautifully, I had almost felt that they were created to fit each other.
All throughout the ride in the elevator, he kissed me as reverently as he could, licking, nipping, nibbling at places in my own body I didn't even know existed.
As soon as we had made way into his home, we had gotten rid of any kind of clothing attached to us whatsoever, stumbling, kissing, biting each other all the way till we reached his bedroom.
He laid me down on the king size bed of his, and had bruised me with hickeys at almost every inch of my skin. The moment he had entered me, I hadn't had any heed to what actually comprised of the world apart from him. So strong and passionate was the sex that night, I had been sure we would be calling the fire brigade that night.
I still can't remember how many times I came. And I still can't remember how many times he declared his love for me that night.
Each time, I had wanted to drown more into the ocean of bliss that he was.
But that was three weeks ago. And this is now.
He knows I am never going to give him the answer to that unasked question of his.
He knows I'll never reciprocate his feelings verbally.
And that is what bugs to me to no extent possible. Why doesn't he give up already?
"Kiri, where are you?" His voice asks on the phone, and I know instantly, what he means.
"At home, Sir. I took care of the French Delegation. They were really happy with the presentation. They'll be finalizing the documents tomorrow. Are you...?" I ask, knowing full well he understands too.
"Yes. In 5 minutes."He replies and disconnects the call.
I rush to the washroom. Flossing, Combing, doing everything simultaneously at lightning fast speed. Why doesn't he give me more than 5 minutes ever? He knows I would be in so much better shape if he told me hours before, than why the hell does he never let me get ready properly?
I hear the doorbell ring, and rush off to the main door.
As soon as I open it, he pounces like a hungry white tiger, devouring me, ravaging me as much as he wants.
I can't help but moan out loud at his insane ministrations on my body. Sinking in the enormous pleasure, I let the world haze out before my eyes again, and blissfully transfer to a land where only he exists. Rey... My Rey.
After what feels like the third time of his trying to cuddle up, I finally give in, tired with the intense work out, only to know that the physical intimacy is going to make him speak out loud now.
"Kiri... I love you." He breathes near my ear, kissing the back of it lightly, as if grazing it with a feather.
No. He cannot know how much that minute kiss of his affects me, and will my body to not shiver under that influence.
"Rey..." I say, the only time I take out his name loud, "You know I don't..."
And I hear him sigh. Quite audibly "...have affairs with your employer." He completes my sentence for me.
I close my eyes. I have always been a firm believer of If I don't see it, it's not happening. And in this case too, I'll continue to ignore how dejected he feels. I'll continue to ignore how tied up he is to me.
And lastly, I'll continue to ignore how tied up I am to him.
I hear his light snoring, and sigh, finally able to breathe normally now that he is asleep.
Tomorrow will just be another day.
"Kiri! Did you know you had almonds in your second drawer?" He chirps, bouncing on my table again.
"I did, Singhania Sir." I reply, sighing. My eyes hurt due to sleep deprivation. How is he so bouncy goddammit? He gets the same sleep as me!
"They were TASTY!" He exclaims, as if he has had almonds for the first time in his life. Can I just hit him? Those were my almonds!
"I am glad you enjoyed them Sir." I say, trying to cut the conversation short. God, I need my sleep, I can't wait to get out of the office, "Now, I am taking my leave Sir. See you on Monday."
"Bubbyee Kiri! You are my favoritest assistant EVER! See you on Monday!" He loudly bids me goodbye, and I start packing my stuff up.
"Kiri, where are you?" I hear him asking on the phone, just as I have finished my dinner. It's almost as if he knows my schedule more than I know his.
"At home, Sir. Are you...?" I ask back, knowing the reply very well.
"Yes. In 5 minutes." And he hangs up.
I smile. Somehow, the 5 minutes fascinate me to no extent possible. Somehow, I never understand why he lets me be the Boss, and becomes Putty in my hands. Somehow, I want it to be this way forever.