Haruka: Crack enters my head once it's empty. I'm making this just to make people's lives a little less serious. I just hope you'll appreciate my efforts... :]

I'm such an idiot. Enough said.

[ Dedicated to my beta - CeraFleur ]

(The not-so-awesome) Haruka-chan doesn't own (the oh-so-awesome) Naruto or any of its (awesomely awesome) crap (of awesomeness). I don't have any rights to it (because it's too awesome). Disclaimer applies to all (awesome :|) chapters.

Behind The Scenes

So what do the Akatsuki do when they're not on missions? They do crap, of course! But they're very different individuals, so each one has his own unique shit to deal with.

Care to share, guys?

~ Hidan / Hidan + Comedy = Epic Fail ~

Due to his insomniac nature, Hidan has recently been hooked on Jay Leno and Saturday Night Live; thus, encouraging him to bring out his comical, joke-cracking side.

As if his idiotic personality doesn't elicit laughs from his co-members.

Anyways… After watching a marathon of sitcoms and reading various joke books, Hidan finally wanted to test his "comedy" skills by sharing a joke with the rest of Akatsuki.

His chance finally came one rainy night, when some of the members were on a mission – namely Pein and Konan – and the others were lounging on the humongous couch in the Akatsuki living room. They were all tuned in on a particular soap opera when a rather terrible thunder erupted and the electricity went off.

When the lights went on a few moments later, though, Deidara hurriedly turned on the TV, only to find the screen full of static lines.

"Fuck, the cable's busted, un! How will we watch the end of the show?" Deidara wailed, throwing away the remote in despair.

"Tobi knows that this show has reruns during the afternoon, sempai," Tobi informed him, trying to console the grieving blonde.

"No, Tobi, I heard they're replacing those reruns with the Oprah Winfrey show." Sasori replied.

"NOOOOOOOOOO!"

At that moment Hidan popped up in front of them, a big goofy grin plastered on his face.

"What do you want, Hidan?" Itachi wearily inquired, his head aching from all the howling and the cursing and the lamenting from the other Akatsuki.

"Knock knock."

All of them stared at Hidan angrily.

"Go away, un."

"I said, 'knock knock'. You're supposed to answer it, you bitches." Hidan exasperatedly explained. "Haven't you ever heard a fucking knock knock joke before?"

Zetsu answered, just to shut up the zealous albino. "Oh, alright. Who's there?"

"Banana."

"Banana who?"

"Knock knock."

"For the love of soap operas, Hidan, you're supposed to answer us first, un. Can't you even make a decent joke, yeah?" Deidara retorted, annoyed at Hidan's idiotic persistence.

"Go fuck yourself you Barbie rip-off, you're ruining the fun. Now shut your bitchy mouth and just cooperate." Hidan shot back irately. "Knock knock."

"Who's there?"

"Banana."

"Banana who?"

"Knock knock."

"Who's there, Hidan-sempai?"

"Orange."

"Oh, for Pete's sake, Hidan..." Kisame moaned impatiently. "Orange who?"

Hidan's stupid grin returned; this time it reached his ears. "Orange you glad I didn't say 'banana'?"

He burst into hysterical laughter at his own joke while the rest looked at him, unamused by Hidan's failed attempt at humor.

"That wasn't funny, Hidan." Zetsu tiredly informed the still-snickering Jashinist, who was busy wiping up his tears. The said man looked up and, true to Zetsu's words, none of them were laughing along with him. Not even a giggle erupted.

"Bullshit! You ignorant heathens wouldn't know a fucking joke if it fucking ripped off your motherfucking heads, bitchy whores!" He retaliated, pissed off that his first shot at comedy didn't impress anyone. His ranting was silenced when Kakuzu's tentacle lunged at his neck. His head fell off and a roar of laughter emerged from the group. Even the stoic Itachi Uchiha was chuckling along with the group.

Meanwhile, Hidan watched their uproar with wide eyes. "I tell you a hell of a joke you couldn't even fucking smile at and you find my decapitation funny? You people are fucking sadistic maniacs."

Thus, Hidan cut all his ties with all things comedy-related. We can just hope that he'll never find Michael Jackson's 'Thriller' on MTV, or hell would break loose for the Akatsuki.

Haruka: I know, I sucked. So sue me. :|

Jay Leno, Saturday Night Live, The Oprah Winfrey Show and the late King of Pop's "Thriller" are definitely not mine. Though, I seriously think Saturday Night Live is the best.

To continue or not to continue? That is the question.

Go answer it for me, will you guys? I'm waaaaaaiting~ *grins like a maniac*

Lots of love and kisses,

Haruka Meiru