Disclaimer: Oh yeah, course I own them! Doubtful.
Summary: Cartman, Kyle, Stan and Kenny hit Capeside, hard!
Bad language and fight scenes included. I'm pretty sure that most people won't like this but hey, what can ya do? It's not meant to cause offence to anyone it's just a bit of fun. I guess when you read it you're gonna have to try and imagine Dawson and co. in animation form, or the Southpark kids in real life, whatever works best for you.
"Here we are boys", Mrs. Cartman cooed as she pulled into the narrow driveway leading to her sister's house.
"About time", her son snapped back.
"Whoa, water", Stan exclaimed excitedly glancing across at the creek, "and it's not frozen!" he added, climbing out of the car.
"Big deal, water, it's just a bunch of wet stuff", Cartman said sarcastically as he climbed out too.
"Eric honey would you boys get our bags out of the trunk while I go inside and find your aunt".
"Mom", he whined in retaliation.
"Eric don't you dare show me up, what did I warn you boys? While we're here you're on your best behaviour", Mrs. Cartman replied sternly.
"She looks pissed you guys, come on", Kyle whispered to Stan and Kenny before walking round to the back of the car.
Mrs. Cartman walked up to the house and entered without knocking while the boys unloaded their luggage.
"So Cartman, what's your cousin like?" Stan questioned.
"Last time we were here he was still sleeping with an E.T. doll, he's a total fag", Cartman replied.
"Man what a wussy", Kyle chimed in.
"Yeah, I could totally kick his ass", Cartman said kicking the air.
"You could not", Stan mocked, "he's like twice your age".
"Nuh uh, I could kick his ass and I'll kick yours too", Cartman yelled.
"You could not LARD MASTER!"
"SCREW YOU HIPPIE!"
Cartman swung the bag he was carrying straight at Stan, which sent him flying down the lawn and into the creek.
Kyle and Kenny erupted in fits of laughter at the sight of Stan flailing wildly in the water.
"How'd you like the water now?" Cartman called back over his shoulder as he marched triumphantly up to the house.
"Dude that was sweet!" Kyle managed through his laughter.
"You guys help me outta here!" Stan shrieked.
Mean while
"So what time do they arrive?" Jen asked quickening her pace to keep up with Dawson.
"They're probably already here", he answered. "So we better hurry up and get back".
"Do I really have to help you baby-sit these brats all day?" She whined.
"Yes if I suffer you do too. Anyway, you volunteered".
"Yeah but when you mentioned showing your cousin Eric and his friends round Capeside for the day I figured you know, maybe he was some cute jock who'd be lonely away from home. That thought was appealing".
"Okay, so maybe I missed out a few details".
"Yeah, like he's an eight year old brat who attends fat camp every summer".
"Look, I'm sure it'll be fine. If not we're meeting Pacey later, we'll dump them on him. He handled that Buzz kid pretty well and he was a real menace".
"I guess, besides, this kid IS related to you, so I don't quite see him being too wild", she said suddenly stopping as his house came into view. "But there are four of them".
"Like I said any trouble and we'll offload them on Pace", he placed a reassuring hand on her shoulder, "but they're just kids, how much trouble can they be?"
Mrs. Cartman and the four children where now seated around the Leery's lounge.
"Eric would you and your little friends like some fresh baked brownies?" Mrs. Leery asked sweetly, entering the room with a plate full. She placed them on the table in the centre of the room and Kenny, Kyle and Stan looked at them hesitantly.
"Thank you aunt Gail", Cartman smiled innocently, "but these guys are allergic. Don't worry though I'll eat theirs for them". And with that he began shovelling then into his mouth before anyone had chance to protest.
"Mom I'm home", Dawson called as he and Jen walked through the back door.
"In here honey", she called back.
By this time Cartman had finished eating the brownies.
"Oh look at that face", his mum said reaching over, hankie at the ready to clean away the remaining crumbs and smears of chocolate, "Now hold still Eric, then you can go and play with your cousin Dawson".
"Get offa me", he squealed batting her hands away. The second Dawson appeared in the doorway he jumped to his feet,
"Dudes let's get out of here!" He said darting towards the door and motioning for the others to follow.
"What the?!" Dawson exclaimed as they stampeded past him and out the front door.
"We better go catch them", Jen said unenthusiastically.
"Have fun!" Mrs. Leery called after them.
"And good luck", Mrs. Cartman added once they where out of earshot.
The boys stopped running when they reached the roadside.
"Eric honey let's clean that face of yours", Kyle said in a mocking tone whilst rubbing Cartman's cheek.
"Ah shut up!" Cartman snapped.
"Dude you're a total mommy's boy", Stan laughed.
"I am not", Cartman shouted.
"You so are", Kyle teased. "Eric honey hold still while mommy wipes your poo poo hole".
"You shut your mouth or I swear I'll. . ."
"Kyle leave it or you might end up in the creek too", Stan said cutting him short.
"Yeah right you wussy, just cause he kicked your ass".
"Yeah and I'll kick yours too", Cartman said threateningly.
"Mph rmph phrph", Kenny added.
"YOU SON OF A BITCH!" Cartman flew at Kenny knocking him to the floor. This stirred Kyle up and, while the on going fight distracted Stan, he punched him in the side of his head.
"YOU ASS HOLE!" Stan shrieked punching him back.
"What the?!" Jen gasped as she and Dawson walked up to them.
"Hey, hey, stop it!" Dawson yelled frantically waving his arms in the air. They, of course, ignored him.
Jen stooped over Cartman and Kenny as they rolled around on the floor exchanging blows. Unfortunately for her she was wearing a rather low cut top.
"Pack it in!" She hollered causing Kenny to look up at her, he froze.
"Mph rmph mph phrph mmph!"
"What?!" Jen shrieked.
Cartman followed Kenny's gaze.
"Whoa check out the hooters on her!"
Stan and Kyle stopped fighting now too.
"Holy mama!" Escaped Kyle's lips.
"You dirty little. . .!" Jen cried bolting upright.
"Cool, my faggot cousin got him self a hottie!" Cartman cheered.
"Excuse me?!" Dawson gasped, "You foul mouthed little. . ."
"Dawson", Jen grabbed his arm to calm him down, "they're just kids remember, just kids".
"You're right", he sighed. "They probably don't even know what the things they're saying mean".
"With a body like that you should be a porn star", Eric smiled, his gaze fixed firmly on Jen's chest.
"Yeah talk to Cartman's mum she'll tell you how to do it", Kyle joked.
"YOU DIRTY MOTHER FU. . .", Cartman began chasing Kyle down the road.
"Hmph mph", Kenny chimed.
"Uh oh, did you say uh oh?" Dawson looked worried.
"Ah relax", Stan said heading after the other two boys, "like that fat ass'll catch him".
Kenny followed leaving Jen and Dawson watching after them completely dumbfounded.
"You said they were from Colorado not the deep pits of hell", Jen said in all seriousness.
"Back up plan", Dawson declared turning to face her, "Let's go find Pacey".
Feedback would be highly appreciated. I mean, should I bother continuing this or not?
Summary: Cartman, Kyle, Stan and Kenny hit Capeside, hard!
Bad language and fight scenes included. I'm pretty sure that most people won't like this but hey, what can ya do? It's not meant to cause offence to anyone it's just a bit of fun. I guess when you read it you're gonna have to try and imagine Dawson and co. in animation form, or the Southpark kids in real life, whatever works best for you.
"Here we are boys", Mrs. Cartman cooed as she pulled into the narrow driveway leading to her sister's house.
"About time", her son snapped back.
"Whoa, water", Stan exclaimed excitedly glancing across at the creek, "and it's not frozen!" he added, climbing out of the car.
"Big deal, water, it's just a bunch of wet stuff", Cartman said sarcastically as he climbed out too.
"Eric honey would you boys get our bags out of the trunk while I go inside and find your aunt".
"Mom", he whined in retaliation.
"Eric don't you dare show me up, what did I warn you boys? While we're here you're on your best behaviour", Mrs. Cartman replied sternly.
"She looks pissed you guys, come on", Kyle whispered to Stan and Kenny before walking round to the back of the car.
Mrs. Cartman walked up to the house and entered without knocking while the boys unloaded their luggage.
"So Cartman, what's your cousin like?" Stan questioned.
"Last time we were here he was still sleeping with an E.T. doll, he's a total fag", Cartman replied.
"Man what a wussy", Kyle chimed in.
"Yeah, I could totally kick his ass", Cartman said kicking the air.
"You could not", Stan mocked, "he's like twice your age".
"Nuh uh, I could kick his ass and I'll kick yours too", Cartman yelled.
"You could not LARD MASTER!"
"SCREW YOU HIPPIE!"
Cartman swung the bag he was carrying straight at Stan, which sent him flying down the lawn and into the creek.
Kyle and Kenny erupted in fits of laughter at the sight of Stan flailing wildly in the water.
"How'd you like the water now?" Cartman called back over his shoulder as he marched triumphantly up to the house.
"Dude that was sweet!" Kyle managed through his laughter.
"You guys help me outta here!" Stan shrieked.
Mean while
"So what time do they arrive?" Jen asked quickening her pace to keep up with Dawson.
"They're probably already here", he answered. "So we better hurry up and get back".
"Do I really have to help you baby-sit these brats all day?" She whined.
"Yes if I suffer you do too. Anyway, you volunteered".
"Yeah but when you mentioned showing your cousin Eric and his friends round Capeside for the day I figured you know, maybe he was some cute jock who'd be lonely away from home. That thought was appealing".
"Okay, so maybe I missed out a few details".
"Yeah, like he's an eight year old brat who attends fat camp every summer".
"Look, I'm sure it'll be fine. If not we're meeting Pacey later, we'll dump them on him. He handled that Buzz kid pretty well and he was a real menace".
"I guess, besides, this kid IS related to you, so I don't quite see him being too wild", she said suddenly stopping as his house came into view. "But there are four of them".
"Like I said any trouble and we'll offload them on Pace", he placed a reassuring hand on her shoulder, "but they're just kids, how much trouble can they be?"
Mrs. Cartman and the four children where now seated around the Leery's lounge.
"Eric would you and your little friends like some fresh baked brownies?" Mrs. Leery asked sweetly, entering the room with a plate full. She placed them on the table in the centre of the room and Kenny, Kyle and Stan looked at them hesitantly.
"Thank you aunt Gail", Cartman smiled innocently, "but these guys are allergic. Don't worry though I'll eat theirs for them". And with that he began shovelling then into his mouth before anyone had chance to protest.
"Mom I'm home", Dawson called as he and Jen walked through the back door.
"In here honey", she called back.
By this time Cartman had finished eating the brownies.
"Oh look at that face", his mum said reaching over, hankie at the ready to clean away the remaining crumbs and smears of chocolate, "Now hold still Eric, then you can go and play with your cousin Dawson".
"Get offa me", he squealed batting her hands away. The second Dawson appeared in the doorway he jumped to his feet,
"Dudes let's get out of here!" He said darting towards the door and motioning for the others to follow.
"What the?!" Dawson exclaimed as they stampeded past him and out the front door.
"We better go catch them", Jen said unenthusiastically.
"Have fun!" Mrs. Leery called after them.
"And good luck", Mrs. Cartman added once they where out of earshot.
The boys stopped running when they reached the roadside.
"Eric honey let's clean that face of yours", Kyle said in a mocking tone whilst rubbing Cartman's cheek.
"Ah shut up!" Cartman snapped.
"Dude you're a total mommy's boy", Stan laughed.
"I am not", Cartman shouted.
"You so are", Kyle teased. "Eric honey hold still while mommy wipes your poo poo hole".
"You shut your mouth or I swear I'll. . ."
"Kyle leave it or you might end up in the creek too", Stan said cutting him short.
"Yeah right you wussy, just cause he kicked your ass".
"Yeah and I'll kick yours too", Cartman said threateningly.
"Mph rmph phrph", Kenny added.
"YOU SON OF A BITCH!" Cartman flew at Kenny knocking him to the floor. This stirred Kyle up and, while the on going fight distracted Stan, he punched him in the side of his head.
"YOU ASS HOLE!" Stan shrieked punching him back.
"What the?!" Jen gasped as she and Dawson walked up to them.
"Hey, hey, stop it!" Dawson yelled frantically waving his arms in the air. They, of course, ignored him.
Jen stooped over Cartman and Kenny as they rolled around on the floor exchanging blows. Unfortunately for her she was wearing a rather low cut top.
"Pack it in!" She hollered causing Kenny to look up at her, he froze.
"Mph rmph mph phrph mmph!"
"What?!" Jen shrieked.
Cartman followed Kenny's gaze.
"Whoa check out the hooters on her!"
Stan and Kyle stopped fighting now too.
"Holy mama!" Escaped Kyle's lips.
"You dirty little. . .!" Jen cried bolting upright.
"Cool, my faggot cousin got him self a hottie!" Cartman cheered.
"Excuse me?!" Dawson gasped, "You foul mouthed little. . ."
"Dawson", Jen grabbed his arm to calm him down, "they're just kids remember, just kids".
"You're right", he sighed. "They probably don't even know what the things they're saying mean".
"With a body like that you should be a porn star", Eric smiled, his gaze fixed firmly on Jen's chest.
"Yeah talk to Cartman's mum she'll tell you how to do it", Kyle joked.
"YOU DIRTY MOTHER FU. . .", Cartman began chasing Kyle down the road.
"Hmph mph", Kenny chimed.
"Uh oh, did you say uh oh?" Dawson looked worried.
"Ah relax", Stan said heading after the other two boys, "like that fat ass'll catch him".
Kenny followed leaving Jen and Dawson watching after them completely dumbfounded.
"You said they were from Colorado not the deep pits of hell", Jen said in all seriousness.
"Back up plan", Dawson declared turning to face her, "Let's go find Pacey".
Feedback would be highly appreciated. I mean, should I bother continuing this or not?