A/N: Okay, I don't actually know where the heck this crap came from. =.= I was just sitting innocently in our Shopwork and before I knew it, I'd already thought about kidnapping Ryoma.

No, joke. XD I was actually sitting innocently in our Shopwork class (when we were supposed to draw a bottle opener. And fuck drawing. Like I'd want to do that. :P) while discreetly reading Fall Into Love in my phone. The part was when Ryoma got kidnapped. XD

Warnings: This crap was written during Mechanical Engineering Shopwork class when we were supposed to DRAW. We have a separate drawing subject and we're having DRAWING in our SHOPWORK class? =.= Gee, weren't we supposed to study Vernier Caliper or something? ANYWAY, please do beware of repetition and grammatical errors. It was impromptu. XD

Disclaimer: I don't own POT.

OH! And I know we're not supposed to write list as fanfics. I dunno what had gotten into me. And my rant is longer than the actual fic. SORRY. :P

10 Reasons Why You Shouldn't Kidnap Echizen Ryoma

by Zero-onE001

1. It'd be of no use threatening him, because you won't be satisfied by it. In fact it's you whom will be threatened: who the heck smirks when threatened about killing his own father?

2. You won't be able to contact his family to ask for a ransom, because he doesn't have their numbers in his phonebook.

3. When you give him bread, he would toss it back and hit you square in the head, demanding where's the patty.

4. He'd ask you for a tennis match.

5. If you refuse, he'll insult you forever.

6. You might have kept an eye on him since he's that good-looking, but you might also be only staring at him when he escapes just under your nose either, because you're actually entranced by him to even realize that he's actually escaping.

7. You can't go near him even when he's unconscious, because his racket is clutched oh-so-tightly in his hand that you won't be able to get it.

8. He'll kill you first by having you lose your sanity.

9. He'd seduce you after a few days just to escape. Of course it wasn't of his free will, he just got tennis-deprived.

10. Tezuka will save Ryoma and you will be given the honor to use the Tezuka Zone (Tezuka's shots will all be directed to you). After all, the captain wouldn't want it if his pillar got kidnapped.

A/N: Pretend nothing had happened. /evaporates

R&R!