A/N: So, I've miraculously turned my twin, Celeste, into a Nathan fangirl. She's not into Metalocalypse, but she did like Charlie a fair bit. Now she's developed a soft spot for Nathan. So, she asked for this fic. Hope you enjoy it, dearest George! Read, review, and enjoy.

~Larien~

"Well, ladies, it looks like Dethklok front man Nathan Explosion is back off the market!" the Dethklok Minute host cheerily announced. "This time, he's gone the intellectual route. He was spotted last night at the premiere of Dear John with famed novelist Serena Dayglow. The two were introduced several weeks ago at Serena's latest book signing, which promoted the newest book in her series Across the Globe. Looks like they hit it off great! Haha, good luck, you two!"

Pickles angrily switched off the TV and glared at Nathan, who was seated on the couch, arms locked behind his head. Skwisgaar, Toki, and Murderface stood behind Pickles, varying levels of anger and annoyance on their faces. Nathan smirked back up at them. Pickles finally sighed, closed his eyes, and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Another one?" he questioned quietly. "Dood, ya r'member the last one, don't ya? She was a harpy bitch that sucked out yer soul. And now ya wanna go through dis again? Are we gonna have ta hurt ya like last time?"

Nathan's grin grew wider, exposing his canines. "I like this one," he stated simply.

"Ja, buts last time dat lady wouldn't lets you does not'ing—NOT'TING!—wit' us!" Skwisgaar shouted angrily. "She nots even lets you goes to Pronsgographys Award! Pfft."

Murderface stepped forward, bringing his face mere inches from Nathan's. "Remember: Women'sch schoulsch were created in Hell. They schmell nische, schure. But they're all the schame! Schoul-murdering demonsch!"

Nathan scowled and wiped the spittle from his face. His friends were really starting to dampen his good mood. "Guys, this one is different. She's…uh…smart. And pretty. And she lets me do stuff!" He stood and glared at them, daring them to say something back.

"Ja?" Toki questioned angrily, oblivious to the challenge in his front man's emerald eyes. "Yous t'ink dis one lets you go to sees da naked ladies? I t'inks not! Shes would tells to you, 'No, Nat'ens, you stay wit' me and not go pals around wit' naked ladies!'"

That did it for Nathan. He got right up in Toki's face, nose-to-nose, and bellowed, "WHO SAYS I'D WANT TO PAL AROUND WITH NAKED LADIES WHEN I CAN PAL AROUND WITH SERENA?!" The two stood, pale eyes glaring into emerald ones and vice-versa, until Charles entered the room.

"Nathan, please step away from Toki. Boys, please stop heckling Nathan," the manager said evenly. "Nathan has chosen to be in a monogamous relationship with this young lady and I'm sure they would both appreciate it if you respected his choice."

"Hey, robot, what ams…uh…mogagmamy? Ja, what ams mogagmamy?" Skwisgaar asked.

Before Charles could answer, Pickles snickered and said, "Dood, it means Nat'en don't wanna do you-know-what with any other ladies."

A wide grin broke out on Skwisgaar's face and he said, "Oh! So, you means, he ams likes de gays?" At this, Nathan's band mates lost themselves in fits of laughter.

Nathan rolled his eyes and began to walk out of the room. He called over his shoulder, "God, you guys are immature! How can I be gay if I'm dating a woman? Yeah, later."

"Hey, where's he go?" Toki asked.

"He has a date tonight, Toki. Speaking of, I have to go put together a team of klokateers to watch Nathan. Oh, and we have a band meeting in ten minutes. I expect you all to be there," Charles said, leaving the room as well.