"How long have you been going out with him?"

"Years." Sergeant Angua shrugged.

"And he hasn't proposed yet?"

"Sally!" Angua sighed. "I don't think he knows anything about that sort of thing!"

Sally von Humpeding, now a constable, sighed. "Of course he does. He just doesn't know how it works."

"Besides, it'd never work! A human and a werewolf! Insane!"

Sally sighed. "It's worked pretty well so far."

"This is different!"

"No, it's not! Listen will you?" Sally said. "Angua, you love him. And, in fact, he loves you back. Listen, if I asked him if it were the city or you, it'd be no contest. He followed you on foot, with out proper clothes, to Überwald!"

"Yes, well, I know that-"

"He would have lunged at another werewolf for you!"

Angua frowned. "You're being difficult."

"No, you are." Sally said. "It's as plain as the nose on your face. As a Wolf!"

Angua sighed. "Look, I don't think he's ever going to, as it were, propose. He's happy as it is right now-"

"Are you?"

Angua bit her tongue to keep from replying honestly. "It's better this way." She said quietly.

"No, it isn't. Look, will you? You jumped in front of a very fast piece of metal to keep him from dying! He fought your brother for you."

"I could have taken him."

"I'm sure you could have. That, however, is not the point." Sally said tartly.

Angua appeared thoughtful for a moment. "How do you learn these stories?"

"Watchmen gossip like old washerwomen." Sally said, waving her hand dismissively. "The point," She said, striving to keep the conversation on the right path, "That I'm make is that you would both be happy if you were married."

"Says who? It annoys him that people carry around silver!"

"It annoys him that they carry around small stakes too, and that people call the trolls names, and he doesn't even swear, Angua!"

"No, he doesn't, does he?"

"And it's not like Ankh-Morpork hasn't been trying it's hardest either."

"It'd be so much easier if he was a werewolf."

"No, no it wouldn't! Because if he was, he wouldn't be him!"

"So." Vimes said delicately to Carrot, "How are you and Angua?"

"We're fine sir." Said Carrot.

"Well, you've been seeing each other for a while, haven't you?"

"Yessir."

"Oh." Vimes said, now unsure.

"How did you propose to Lady Sybil, sir?" "Er. Well. It was sort of, ah, an agreement. I was going to ask her, and I suppose she knew that already, and er," Vimes continued nervously, "it was, well, agreed."

"It's just that I thought I might ask Angua."

"I'm sure she'd say yes, Carrot."

"Only, I'm afraid that she might run away." Carrot continued.

Vimes eyebrows came together. "What?"

"See, Cheery said that the time that Vetinari was ill, after we'd all gotten it sorted out, Angua thought it was too much for me. That is, it was really annoying me about the whole silver thing."

"Wasn't it?"

"Yes, but sir, I've gotten over that."

"She was running away?"

"Yes sir, but I'd appreciate it-"

"She'd better not run away! It's my damn watch, and she's one of the best damn sergeants I've got! What am I supposed to do, swear in a new one?"

"If you didn't mention it. She doesn't know that Cheery told me." Carrot continued. "I'm afraid she might feel her trust was broken."

Vimes frowned for a moment. "So, how were you planning on asking her?"

"That's why I was asking you sir."

Sally sighed again. "Think for just a moment, will you? Why have you been staying here?"

"Because I can always run away-"

"Yes, but why would you be running away?"

"Because it'd be what's best for him!"

"And you don't think that he'd cry and be sad?"

"No, but he'd get over it." Angua said with less certainty.

Sally gave her a Look. "Really? Angua, really? Besides, would you ever get over it?"

Angua blushed Cherry red. "But it'd be better for him-"

"Don't you think he feels the same way about you?"

Angua blushed scarlet.

"Imagine, just once how it would be."

Angua opened her mind's imagination…

They could work together, and live together. He'd even understand about the shutters being closed. They could have a nice house just on the outskirts of town. They wouldn't even have to pay for it-she could send a letter to her parents for money. They could have children-

And that's where the fairytale stops. Because there could be problems. No, not could. Would. There always were. If they had kids, what would stop them from being all wolf?

"It wouldn't work."

"Because you keep making problems for yourself."

"I'm a werewolf!"

"What's one of your problems?"

"Well, if we have any kids…"

"You'd be afraid of having a full wolf?"

The vampire could practically read her mind! "It'd be an awful thing!"

"I don't think Carrot would mind." Sally said carefully.

"No, he wouldn't. I told him my brother was a champion sheepherder, and when I just called him a sheepherder, he said, 'A Champion sheepherder.'"

"Well, there you go-"

"No, it's not 'there you go'. It's not!"

"Why!?"

"Because!" Angua said, angrily. "Because it never works out, and it never will."

"Not if you don't give it a try."

"So you think I should talk to Colon?"

"Er. No?"

"What about Detritus?"

"No." Vimes said, much more definitely.

"Who then?"

"Well." Vimes said, "Who has she been close to lately?"

"Well, she did go out for drinks with Sally and Cheery, and she has been talking to Sally a bit."

"Well, there you go-" Vimes stopped. "A werewolf and a vampire? They went out for drinks? Together?"

"Yes sir."

"And there was nothing wrong?"

"No sir. I don't believe so."

"Are you sure?"

"Pretty much so sir."

Vimes frowned. As usual it had been a long day. If a vampire and a werewolf wanted to go out and have drinks together, who was he to stop them? Vetinari was all for them all getting along. "Well, Maybe you could talk to Constable von Humpeding about it. I'm sure she has some good ideas."

Angua sighed angrily. "I've got to get to the watch house."

"I'll walk with you." Sally offered.

"No!" Angua said. "I need to think."

"I'm going to the watch house anyway. I'm on duty."

"Fine." Angua said. "But don't you dare mention any of this to anyone. Especially Carrot."

"Fine." Sally agreed amiably. "I won't. But I have Cheery waiting at Mrs. Palm's, to tell me if you even try running away after this."

"That's not fair." Angua said.

"Life is not fair. I just don't want you running out on my account."