He saw it.
He saw Oakfall cornered against a birch tree, his green eyes wide with fear, and Shadowcloud looming in front of him, her claws sparkling in the moonlight and her eyes blazing in an undeniable rage.
He heard Shadowcloud's last words to Oakfall, spoken in a silky purr. He flinched as he remembered the sound of her voice and the way it seemed to echo through the silent, dark forest.
"You'll regret you ever lied to me."
Suddenly, Shadowcloud brought her paw down and landed a deafening blow on Oakfall's head. He stood there, fear washing through him like a wave as the brown tabby's green gaze dimmed, and he slumped into a pile of fur.
He remembered standing there like a deer in the headlights, dizzy and afraid. He luckily had the strength to hide behind a clump of ferns. Peeking around the dense green plants, he saw Shadowcloud look around, her amber eyes dark. After deciding that no one was around, the black she-cat lumbered off.
He had felt disturbed, and hadn't moved from that exact spot behind the ferns until Cherryfeather and Molewhisker found him and scolded him for making the Clan worry.
"Especially Dappleflame," Cherryfeather had meowed. "I'd say she has a crush on you."
But he didn't care.
He still loved a murderer.
He still loved Shadowcloud.
It had been three moons since Shadowcloud murdered Oakfall. Everyone had assumed that he had been killed by a fox or badger, as Shadowcloud had been clever enough to mask her scent.
Speaking of Shadowcloud, she and Dappleflame were sharing prey, talking excitedly in low voices. Sparrowflight's ears were pricked, listening in on every single word. He was eating maybe a fox-length away, chewing on a thrush.
"I still miss Oakfall," Dappleflame confessed, her blue eyes wide with pain. "Other than Sparrowflight and you, he was the only one who understood me. And," she added slyly, "I loved pairing you guys up."
"Oakfall and I actually were mates," Shadowcloud said after a small pause.
"What?! Really?" Dappleflame exclaimed excitedly. "I knew it!"
Shadowcloud looked away, but Sparrowflight caught a sinister look crossing her face. His dark brown tabby pelt bristled suspiciously. No doubt she was remembering brutally murdering Oakfall in the night. And, really, they were mates, that much was true. When they left together that night, the guards assumed they were going on a walk... Which they sort of had.
But night walks usually don't end in a cat murdering their own mate.
In his state of thought, Sparrowflight had missed Dappleflame say something. He hissed in annoyance, which accidentally drawed the two she-cats' attention to him.
"Hey, Sparrowflight!" Shadowcloud called, her eyes brightening. "Come over and join us!" She waved her fluffy black tail to emphasize her point.
Despite her being a murderer and a liar, Sparrowflight couldn't help the warm feeling spreading through his chest. He made Shadowcloud happier...
"Are you coming or not?" Dappleflame asked, which shattered Sparrowflight's train of thought. Slightly bewildered, the dark-furred ThunderClan warrior nodded swiftly and padded over, settling down beside Shadowcloud.
"So, what's up?" Sparrowflight asked tentatively, making sure to eye Shadowcloud as carefully and secretively as he could. He knew she was the murderer, but it would definitely help if he had subtle proof. Many times he had thought he dreamt it up and just believed it was real, but Oakfall was dead. No one could fake that.
"I was talking about how Shadowcloud and Oakfall did actually get together!" Dappleflame exclaimed, inching closer to him. "They would've had cute kits."
"But Oakfall's dead," Sparrowflight meowed carefully, avoiding Dappleflame's sky blue eyes to stare into Shadowcloud's amber ones. "Doesn't that bother you?" he asked more to the black warrior than Dappleflame.
Shadowcloud bristled slightly, meeting his gaze without even blinking. "Of course!" she snapped, her amber eyes darkening. "Oakfall is my mate, and he's dead. Why wouldn't it bother me?"
Sparrowflight narrowed his eyes, and flicked his tail sharply. "It wouldn't bother you if you were the one who-"
"Hey, I thought we were talking!" Dappleflame interrupted him, glaring at Sparrowflight indignantly.
The dark brown tabby tom sighed impatiently. "Listen, Dappleflame, this is important-"
"More important than me?"
"Yes!" Sparrowflight snapped, his patience gone. "Listen, I'll talk to you later, okay?"
Dappleflame scoffed at him, her tortoiseshell pelt bristling in anger. After a few moments, the warrior turned, walking away and leaving tension in her wake.
"You didn't have to be rude," Shadowcloud commented.
"How else do I get her to leave?" Sparrowflight muttered sourly.
"You know she likes you a lot," the black she-cat added. "She might not after that."
"I really don't care if she likes me or not," Sparrowflight meowed. "I like someone else, anyway."
"Oh? Who?"
"I'm not telling you!" the tabby tom retorted, his ears burning. "Anyways, this is irrelevant. I actually came to talk about something that's been bothering me."
Shadowcloud's ears pricked. Good, her interest was peaked. "What is it?"
Sparrowflight flattened his tail to the ground, bracing himself for the argument he just knew would come. "I... I saw you murder Oakfall!"
Shadowcloud nearly fell over in shock. "What?" she sputtered in disbelief, her eyes wide. "You... you saw that?!"
"Of course!" Sparrowflight meowed angrily. "What kind of walk ends like that?"
Shadowcloud's fur bristled, her eyes narrowing dangerously. "Y-you..." she stammered angrily under her breath. "I had my reasons!"
"Oh? And what specifically were those reasons?" Sparrowflight growled, his fur fluffing up dangerously.
"He lied to me! He said he loved me!"
"So?" the dark brown tabby spat, obviously displeased. "Oakfall was still our friend anyway! You didn't have to kill him for something stupid like that!"
Shadowcloud snarled, flashing her teeth angrily. "What do you know?" she hissed. "He was a liar and a faker! He only became my mate because he wanted to be loyal! He loved someone from another Clan!"
Sparrowflight faltered at that. "Really?" he asked, olive green eyes wide.
"Her name was Sunflower," Shadowcloud meowed, her voice coming out cold and full of distaste. "She was from WindClan. And what a pretty she-cat she was!" Her voice got higher and the hatred coming off of her pelt was almost suffocating. "With her golden tabby pelt and amazing blue eyes. Oakfall wouldn't stop talking or thinking about her!"
"You're prettier," Sparrowflight blurted out.
Shadowcloud stared at him in surprise for a few moments before Sparrowflight realized what he said.
"I-I mean," he stuttered. "I've seen her before, at Gatherings. S-She wasn't that pretty." Not as pretty as you, he wanted to say.
Shadowcloud lashed her tail, the awkward moment before seemingly forgotten. "Oakfall and Sunflower visited each other every night." Suddenly, she stood up straighter, amber eyes shining. "Until I found them," she added proudly.
"So you're telling me you killed Oakfall because he was visiting Sunflower." Sparrowflight counted everything up, and it sure seemed that way. But something wasn't adding up. Before she could even respond to his statement before, he meowed, "What happened to Sunflower?"
"Oh, she got exiled because I told on her," Shadowcloud said, still giving off a proud air. "Hah, WindClan scum! I think she was pregnant, too!"
Sparrowflight puffed. "Geez, Shadowcloud, would it kill you to be nice?"
Shadowcloud laughed, the gentle sound echoing in Sparrowflight's ears. "Oakfall should be glad I killed him before the news could spread to us," she meowed lightly. "He would've been in some deep trouble."
Sparrowflight laughed along for a moment before realizing he was supposed to be mad. "H-Hey," he said, trying to add a small growl to his voice but failing, "I'm still mad at you for killing my friend! He was pretty cool, even if he was fake."
Shadowcloud scoffed at this. "Are you sure we're talking about the same cat? Oakfall was not cool."
The two cats laughed, remembering just how uncool he really was. Once he'd tried to impress Shadowcloud, but somehow ended up destroying half the apprentices den, causing a bird attack, and annoying Stormstar, ThunderClan's leader, half to death.
When Shadowcloud finally stopped laughing, she meowed, "You won't tell anyone I killed him, will you?"
Sparrowflight blinked at her, green eyes meeting amber ones. He had never noticed before that there were light specks of dark brown in the depths of Shadowcloud's eyes, and how soft her black pelt looked. The sun hit her right at a perfect angle, turning her fur silver in some places. The dark brown tabby's breath caught in his throat before managing to smile.
"Of course not."
And he never would.
"May all cats old enough to catch their own prey gather beneath the High-Ledge!"
Stormstar's call startled Sparrowflight out of his daze. He looked up from his squirrel and saw that cats were streaming out of their dens, muttering things under their breath. He smiled, spotting Shadowcloud sitting near Dappleflame nearby. Getting to his paws, he padded forward and sat next to the black she-cat, purring a greeting.
"Hey, Shadowcloud."
"Sparrowflight!" Shadowcloud exclaimed excitedly, nuzzling him. "I have something to tell you!"
"It might have to wait until after the meeting," Dappleflame meowed quietly. "Stormstar's about to start."
Shadowcloud glanced at her friend sympathetically. It had been seven moons since Sparrowflight confronted Shadowcloud about Oakfall's murder, and now the two were mates. Sparrowflight couldn't help but get the feeling he was just replacing Oakfall, but shook it off once he realized Shadowcloud didn't talk about him anymore and whenever his name came up, she'd ignore it.
Dappleflame, however, was upset with this pairing. It was true. She did have a crush on Sparrowflight, even after their argument seven moons ago. When Shadowcloud announced that they were mates, Dappleflame was devastated. She had completely shut everyone else out and wouldn't go on patrols anymore. She still tried to be a good, supportive friend, but Sparrowflight knew her grasp on that title was slipping.
Once every cat gathered, Stormstar adjusted his position on the High-Ledge before starting. "Now that we're all gathered here, I need to say something. I know his death was ten moons ago, but it's about Oakfall."
Whispers spread through the Clan like wildfire. Shadowcloud leaned on Sparrowflight's shoulder slightly, her eyes wide and her expression panicked. Secretly, Sparrowflight shared that same fear. What if they found out?
"It appears," the dark gray tabby leader continued, "that his death… was no accident. He was not killed by a fox or badger. He was murdered by one of us!"
At this, tensions began flooding through the camp. "Who did it?"s and "Who would do that?"s were thrown into the air. Cats were bristling, their claws digging into the ground. The Clan looked at each other, suspicion burning in their eyes.
Shadowcloud pressed closer to Sparrowflight, muttering an "Oh no," under her breath. Sparrowflight tensed, looking at Stormstar closely. Did he know? Or was he just creating tension because he really had no idea either?
"Did you hear that?" Dappleflame meowed, a speck of emotions escaping into her voice. "S-Someone murdered Oakfall!"
Sparrowflight couldn't help but think she looked guilty.
"The one who murdered Oakfall…" Stormstar paused for suspense, his dark tabby tail flicking on the rocks of the High-Ledge. "Was Shadowcloud!"
Gasps flew through the Clan and every cat turned towards Shadowcloud. Sparrowflight could then feel her dire need to disappear into a hole.
"You did it?" a black and white she-cat, Duskleaf, asked in disbelief. "B-But he was your mate!"
"I can't believe you!" a dark brown tabby and white tom, Owlfeather, snarled. "You killed my brother!"
"What do you have to say for yourself, Shadowcloud?" Stormstar asked, looking down at her with his cold, calculating blue eyes.
"I-I…" Shadowcloud stuttered, shrinking at everyone's gaze on her. "I…"
"She did do it." Dappleflame's hollow voice echoed through the camp. Everyone immediately whipped their heads around to stare at the tortoiseshell warrior. Her blue eyes looked foggy and unfocused, but her posture was sure and she had an indefinite frown on her face. "Seven moons ago, Sparrowflight and Shadowcloud were talking about it."
"Exile!" Stormstar yelled gleefully, a smirk lining his features. "Shadowcloud is exiled!"
This time, cheers rang through the camp. Shadowcloud glanced at Dappleflame, betrayal glowing in her amber eyes. "How could you?" she whispered, eyes fixed on her tortoiseshell friend.
"I'm sorry, Shadowcloud. Really, I am." Dappleflame looked at her with emotionless blue eyes. "But now Sparrowflight's mine."
Sparrowflight blinked, green eyes wide. "You did this so you could have me to yourself?" he asked in disbelief.
"Of course!" Dappleflame meowed, purring at him. She stepped forward, shoving Shadowcloud out of the way, and then nuzzled Sparrowflight adoringly. "Now, run along, Shadowcloud! Have fun in the wilderness!"
Shadowcloud's tail drooped dejectedly. She padded past all the cats, looking down at her paws the whole time. But just before she exited camp forever, Sparrowflight broke out of Dappleflame's grasp and raced toward her.
"Shadowcloud, wait!" he yelled.
The black she-cat stopped in her tracks, turning to face him. Her amber eyes were full of regret and tears. "Sparrowflight, just let me leave," she meowed sadly. "There's nothing you can do."
"No," Sparrowflight spat. "I-I… I'm going with you!"
Shadowcloud blinked in surprise. "But-"
"Dappleflame and Owlfeather, escort these two out of my sight!" Stormstar spat angrily. "If he wishes to join the murderer, then we cannot trust him."
Dappleflame and Owlfeather immediately headed towards them, Dappleflame's eyes devoid of emotion and Owlfeather's burning with fury. Once they both stood in front of Shadowcloud and Sparrowflight, they headed out.
"Come on," Owlfeather spat when he realized they weren't following him.
The two cats jumped in surprise before following them quietly.
It was an awkward silence as the group of four headed through the forest. Shadowcloud tried sparking up a conversation with Dappleflame multiple times, but she was either ignored or shoved away in annoyance. It pained Sparrowflight to see his friend, or, his acquaintance like this. He wished things had never changed all those moons ago when Oakfall died.
Finally, they reached the edge of the border and the start of anyone's territory. Owlfeather gave Shadowcloud a shove and meowed, "If I see you ever again, I'm ripping your pelt off." With that, the dark-colored tom walked away.
Dappleflame stayed there for a moment, her expression still blank. After a few seconds, she muttered, "I'm sorry," and then raced back into ThunderClan territory.
Shadowcloud gazed after her sadly while Sparrowflight regarded his mate curiously. Just before the meeting, just before the accusations start, he remembered something she had said.
"Hey Shadowcloud," Sparrowflight started off carefully, "what did you want to tell me before?"
The black she-cat turned to him, blinking sadly at him. She managed a weak smile and meowed, "I'm pregnant."
Sparrowflight could only blink at her.
This was a tragedy.
Sparrowflight just couldn't believe how ironic it was.
He stared down at Shadowcloud's dead body, barely acknowledging the three kits whimpering in the crook of her belly, begging for milk they would never get. Because their mother was dead. Because she was a murderer. Because that was how karma worked.
He remembered, all those moons ago, how proudly she had stated that she drove off Sunflower, Oakfall's secret mate. Sunflower was pregnant too.
…
Sparrowflight was sure Sunflower wasn't dead.
She hadn't committed a crime.
Her love wasn't a mess like Shadowcloud's was.
Sparrowflight absentmindedly looked at his three kits, noticing how one of them had Shadowcloud's same color scheme. "She'll never see you," he murmured, licking the kit's head regretfully. This shouldn't have happened. If he hadn't existed, this wouldn't have happened.
"Hello?" A voice shattered the intense silence, breaking Sparrowflight out of his saddened daze. "Anyone here? I heard yowling so I came to help!"
Sparrowflight blinked in annoyance, standing protectively in front of his kits. He knew they wouldn't live, but he had to try to believe, didn't he?
With a rustle, a pretty golden tabby she-cat erupted from the bushes, two kits following her. One was a brown tabby with white paws and green eyes, and the other was a light brown tabby with the same blue eyes as the she-cat. "Oh!" the she-cat meowed once she spotted Sparrowflight. She rushed towards him and the kits, gasping in surprise. "W-What happened?"
"S-She…" With a start, Sparrowflight realized that the she-cat who came to check on him and his kits was Sunflower. The very same Sunflower who was Oakfall's mate.
"Oh, I'm so sorry," Sunflower meowed, looking at him sadly. "She was your mate, right?"
"Y-Yeah," Sparrowflight stuttered, looking at his paws. "You're Sunflower, aren't you? Oakfall's mate?"
"Yeah," the she-cat meowed in surprise. "How'd you know?"
"Well, I'm Sparrowflight," he meowed, still staring at the ground. "She's Shadowcloud. We used to be part of ThunderClan but…"
"You got exiled? I know the feeling," Sunflower meowed in a soothing voice, brushing her tail along his back. "Want me to help your kits? I still have plenty of milk."
"T-That'd be nice," Sparrowflight murmured, finally looking Sunflower in the eye. For a moment, he got lost in her dazzling blue eyes, but then blinked hard. Shadowcloud would be happy if her kits stayed alive, he thought. But then he remembered this was Sunflower. On second thought, maybe I should find a different queen…
But before he could voice his opinion out loud, the golden tabby queen flicked her tail for him to follow her. "Come on," Sunflower purred. "Taking care of five kits might be hard for me, but we can get through it together."
Sparrowflight flinched inwardly at her words, looking back at Shadowcloud. "What about her…?"
But Sunflower had already disappeared back into the bushes.
Sparrowflight knew why, though. She hated Shadowcloud. It was obvious. Sunflower knew Shadowcloud, and she knew her too well.
And this was why he never trusted Sunflower.
As Sparrowflight padded through the bushes after her, he twitched his whiskers as a new thought entered his mind. As soon as his kits were old enough to survive on their own, they would run away together. They didn't need Sunflower. Sunflower wasn't their mother and never would be…
…
….
He never would.
This was a tragedy.
His life was a tough game but maybe he was playing it just fine.