Bad Ideas Gone Wrong Productions Presents
Olim lacus colueram
A Ranma 1/2 fanfic by Geoduck
"Good morning, honored customer and welcome to ancient cursed training grounds of Jusenkyo.
"Please do not be straying off the path. The many springs of Jusenkyo all very dangerous, all have very tragic story.
"This one, for example: Nyanniichuan, spring of drowned girl. In this spring, young girl drowned, one thousand five hundred years ago. Any customer who fall in cursed to take body of young girl. And this one Shonmaoniichuan, spring of drowned panda. Panda drowned here two thousand years ago. Customer who fall in cursed to take body of panda.
"When soaked in hot water, customer turn back to normal self. But when soaked in cold water again, customer turn back to cursed body.
"Many springs in Jusenkyo. All have very tragic story.
"Some springs more tragic than others. Customer who take body of young girl still human. Customer who take body of panda become protected species.
"Customer who take body of duck, or quail, or piglet, or calf? Not so lucky.
"I, uh, hear story of man who find black piglet near Jusenkyo, decide to make Cantonese-style sweet and sour pork. He drop piglet in boiling water to cook... Aiya! It not piglet at all! It boy!
"This person who try to cook pig then become vegetarian. Because he remember in past finding many piglets and ducks, geese and quail, calves and deer...
"But he never before put animals in boiling water. He always roasting or frying animals.
"Very... VERY tragic story."
The title comes from one of the poems in the collection of medieval poems called Carmina Burana. It's sung from the point of view of a swan being eaten.