Lily ran through the barrier between platforms 9 and 10 to reach the beginning of her seventh year. She felt a breeze of cool air meet her as she walked forward to meet the Hogwarts Express. This year was going to be different she thought wistfully to herself. With the threat of Voldemort rising, Lily often feared what it would be like venturing out alone after this year. She knew she couldn't stay with her muggle family, and she couldn't stay at Hogwarts forever. But Hogwarts had always seemed to prepare her for whatever was coming her way, and she knew it wouldn't let her down now.
Lily was now stepping up into the train so reach her new Head Girl's compartment. When she had gotten the letter over break that she was chosen, she almost fainted with excitement. Everything about this year would be perfect, she just knew it. She was almost sure that Head Boy would be Remus, seeing as he'd been a prefect as long as she had been. She liked Remus well enough, seeing as he was the most levelheaded out of his pompous, arrogant, pranking, no –good, rotten, aggravating, persistent, inflated head friends. But Lily wouldn't get started on them. She wasn't going to let Potter spoil her year. She spotted her friend Alice, walking down the hall.
"Alice, hey!" Lily cried, hugging her friend. Alice was a tall slender girl with dirty blonde hair falling gracefully at her mid-back.
"Lily, there you are! I had to check, I mean we all figured, but, " Alice gushed, eyeing her head girl badge, " oh you are! I'm so happy for you! Molly is waiting in a compartment down the hall, but I guess you'll have to go check in for you head duties and what not."
"Yeah, let me get all that taken care of, and I'll come find you." Lily answered as she continued down the hall of the now moving train. Sliding open the door of the head compartment, she recklessly shoved her truck inside.
"Ow!" cried someone sitting inside the compartment. " That was my foot!"
"Oh, yes I'm sorry I-" Lily stopped short as she looked up to see not Remus, or any other respectable boy, but Potter. James Potter. She straightened up and stiffened at the site of him.
"P-P- Potter," Lily stammered, " are you waiting on Remus or someone in here?"
"No," he answered slowly, not sure where she was going with this. "I'm supposed to be in here, I mean, this is the head's compartment right?"
Lily gaped at what she was seeing. Dumbledore had truly lost his marbles. She'd always thought he went a bit too heavy on the sweets….
"You, I mean you are head boy?" Lily asked disbelieving.
"That's what the letter said," James answered coolly. "Anyway they already left a list of duties and what not in here. Here's yours." He handed her the papers to a still stunned Lily. He seemed to linger for a moment at the site of her face, with a faint smile twitching at his lips.
"I know," he said in his warm, honey- toned voice, " I couldn't believe it either." He shot her one of his trademark James Potter smiles, and for the first time Lily wasn't immune, as she could feel herself start to melt…..WAIT. I'm not melting. He's just matured physically and ONLY physically and, uhh, my teenage subconscious is taking notice. That's all. He's still his stupid bullying, toerag self.
" Well that should do it," James said standing up. " I think I'll go try and find Sirius before he gets into too much trouble…"
"Wait, wait a minute…" Lily said beginning to question his actions. " No, 'Come on Evans, just one date' or the classic ' Oh Evans you know you can't resist me?' Nothing? " She stated the last part in her mock macho male voice.
"Nope," he said in a deep, and serious voice, "not this year."
And then he walked out of the compartment leaving a confused and genuinely baffled Lily sitting on the bench. He doesn't like me anymore? Well what did I do? Do I look any different? Did I say something at the end of last year? HOLD ON. This is great! No more James Potter. No more ducking corners in corridors, or the teasing and taunting. I finally got through to him. She wanted to feel happy for herself, but somehow she just couldn't bring herself to it. Alice and Molly will cheer me up, she thought as she gathered her things.
She walked out of the compartment and made her way down the hall when she met the classic scene that occurred every year on the train ride to school.
"Now Snivlly whivlly, you know I was really hoping that you'd try to better your appearance this year, since you knew I'd have to look at you occasionally. " Sirius began with his usually Severus humiliation speech to kick off another year of torture from the Marauders. "I would have hoped that you would have more consideration for my poor eyes."
Snape glared with his wand clutched tight in his hand under his robes as he began to shake. Everyone was in the nearby compartments were gathering in the hall to see the fight. Lily stayed back watching from a distance.
"N-no- no, not this year, Sirius. You and your stupid friends aren't going to push me around this year, " Snape tried to get out, almost cowering under Sirius, who had grown quite a few inches over the summer.
"Oh now, Snivs, did you just call my friends stupid?" Sirius inquired with an overpowering presence. "Tsk, Tsk, Snape that simply won't do. I think I may just have to punish you for your disrespectful actions."
Sirius raised his wand, about to call out a curse, when a voice from behind stopped him.
"Come off it Sirius," James said in a soft, but forceful voice. Lily almost gasped, struck by James's jumping in. It was so out of character and, well actually kind of mature.
"Oh come on James, don't tell me you're going to let your head duties get in the way of having some fun." Sirius responded, looking back at James.
"I don't help from some filthy miscreant like you." Snape sneered.
"Fine," James answered, "come on Sirius, let's go.
"Yeah, whatever," Sirius answered, clearly disappointed. "It's not as if Snivellus is ever going to wash his hair, so I suppose we can chat with the same effect any time." At this point Snape pulled out his wand with his shaky hand and shouted a hex, but with his poor aim, it hit James instead of Sirius. James hit the ground, blood trickling down his arm.
"You'll pay for that," Sirius shouted, rounding back around toward Snape.
"No, just leave it," James said getting up as he clutched his arm. "I'm fine." Sirius gave a pleading look at James before turning around back to Snape.
"You're lucky James has decided to be all chivalrous today," Sirius fiercely said to Snape, "or believe me, you wish you were never born."
Snape, now being aware that everyone was giving him the same glaring look as Sirius, hurried back down the hall and into a compartment. Lily knew she should take points, or report him, but she couldn't look away from James. She stood there for a moment, slightly leaning on the wall, as she watched him, almost in awe, as he performed a healing spell on his arm. This was a new James, she was sure now. The old James would have never told Sirius to back off, nor would he have let Snape curse him without some retaliation.
What had changed him? Lily thought to herself, and well, why doesn't he like me? And why do I even care? Isn't this what I always wanted?
Lily woke up from her dazeas James cleared his throat, noticing that she was staring. She quickly looked down, and around, and anywhere that wasn't him. She quickly slipped into Alice and Molly's compartment.
"Hey guys," Lily said.
"Hey Lily, how are the head duties going?" her friend Molly asked, who was slightly on the short side, with shoulder length brown hair.
"Oh it's good. Say, you two haven't run into Jam- I mean Potter yet, have you? Lily asked, trying to her best to sound casual.
"No, actually I haven't. That's strange, he usually comes to see us first on train rides, to find where you are. Why do you ask? " Alice inquired with one eyebrow raised.
"Oh well, just that, he's head boy this year. And, I don't know, he just seems so different this year. Like the fight down the corridor a minute ago. Snape shot some hex at him, and he didn't even do anything back."
"Whoa, that really isn't like James. Maybe he finally took all of your big head comments to heart and decided to grow up." Molly said, "Gee, I hope Sirius hasn't decided to mature all of the sudden. He'd be much less fun…."
Lily laughed softly at her remark. She knew that Molly had liked Sirius for a long time. She, unlike Lily, didn't think the Marauders needed any aging, and appreciated Sirius's boyish and playful nature. Lily had secretly always thought they'd make a great couple. Molly was shy, and needed an outgoing person to bring out the humor in wit in her.
"You know James didn't even ask me out when he saw me. I asked him about it, and he said he wasn't going to this year. Not at all." Lily said, recalling his words.
"Wow it sounds like he really did take your words to heart over the summer." Alice commented, "You it's kind of sad when you think about it. I mean we all know that James would be perfect if he could ever just grow up a bit. I mean look at him. And now that he has he isn't even going to ask you out anymore?"
"Yea I mean I was always just waiting for him to mature, I mean he's so cute, I couldn't resist it forev- " Lily clapped her hand over her mouth as she realized what she was saying. Molly looked like she was going to burst.
"You like James? I just knew it! You two were so perfect, it had to happen sometime!"
"SHHHH," Lily said, trying to get her to lower her voice. She would be absolutely mortified if anyone found out, let alone the whole train. "I don't know if I like him or not, well, I'm just not sure. I didn't think I did. Until I saw him, and he didn't ask me out. It's like it sparked something in me. I'd never thought I'd lose James, so I was content waiting until he got his act together, I didn't know he wasn't going to be around forever…."
"Lily! This is big! You have to tell him," Alice said in a half giggle.
"NO. That's just what he needs to bring back the old James. To find out he's been right all these years." Lily said.
"It wouldn't bring back the old James, not if he's truly changed," Molly pointed out, "and judging from your reaction, I think he has. For good."
The screeching of metal could be heard as the train came to a stop. The three girls got their things and made for the exit of train.
As they walked into the great hall Lily found her eyes searching around for James as she took her seat. Stop it, she scolded herself. You don't care where he is. He's not importa-
Lily's thoughts stopped abruptly when she spotted him, sitting next to Alexis Wilson, a slender girl in her year with dark hair. She was saying something to James, causing him to lean his head down to here through the noisy hall., and making him laugh.
She giggles like a hyena Lily thought to herself, and she must be wearing 10 pounds of makeup on that fake face of hers.
Lily was still staring as she took her seat. Of course James chose to look up, and saw Lily. They locked eyes for a second, James wearing a confused look on his face. Again Lily quickly looked away. Alexis caught on, and promptly grabbed James's arm to tell him, what was sure to be another hilarious story.
I can't let him catch me staring again, he'll start to think I like him or something. Oh wait….. I do. Darnit.
Dumbledore stood up to give his start of the year speech. Soon they had all eaten and were ready to pop from stuffing themselves. It was time to go up the common rooms, and the heads were supposed to go get the first years.
Here we go….. Lily thought.
She got up and walked over to James who was still talking to Alexis. She eyed Lily as she approached them.
"Hey James, we have to go get the first years." Lily said trying to sound collected, while she was a wreck inside.
"Oh yea, of course. See ya Alexis." James said getting up. Alexis glared at Lily as they walked away together.
"You yell to get their attention, my voice won't carry," Lily said.
"First years, over here! First year Gryffindors, over here!" James called out. Up came a group of kids, some looking eager and excited, while most looked scared out of their wits. James smiled at the terrified looks on their faces.
Not a taunting smile, Lily observed, but a warm comforting smile, he has such a nice smile, his lips are shaped so nicely, and they look so soft….
James eyed her out of the corner of his eye.
You're staring again! I forbid myself to look at him ever again. I'll go to the library tonight and look up a spell to see if there's something I can do to my eyes so it will hurt to look at him, then I won't have to worry about it anymore. Oh who am I kidding….
"I'm James Potter, the head boy, and this is Lily Evans, the head girl." James explained.
I like how he says my name. Lily Evans sounds so much better when he says it. I wonder what Lily Potter would sound like if he said it……
"Uhhh, pssp, Lily….. earth to Lily," James whispered under his breath, "tell them the password."
"Ohhhh right." Lily snapped back to herself. She had to be professional. "As all of you were sorted into Gryffindor, you will be living with all of the Gryffindors. You will enter our common room through a painting in the wall, with a, uh, rather large lady on it. But before the lady will let you enter, you will have to supply her with the password. The password is a secret that only Gryffindors know, and promise not to tell any other member in a different house. The password can change and if you find yourself without it, you can always ask one of us, or the prefects. Now we'll lead you all to the common room. The castle can get confusing so look for things that may help you remember your way. Don't worry, you'll learn your way around soon."
They led the first years out the doors and down the hall.
"What happened back there?" James asked, "You kind of zoned on us."
"Oh yea, sorry about that," Lily said blushing slightly, "I was just thinking about something."
"Well it must have been a pretty interesting something, because believe me from experience, it takes a lot to distract Lily Evans from the line of duty." James said playfully.
"You could say it was interesting. Matter of fact, I found myself fascinated." Lily said as the pace of their walk slowed to let the first years take everything in.
"Well now you have to tell me, what it is, I'm completely intrigued." James said with an exaggerated tone. Lily shook her head.
"Sorry, I'm afraid I can't." Lily replied.
"Ohh even more intrigue. Why ever not?" James said.
"I'm afraid I can't tell you that either." Lily said with a half smile.
"Well it wouldn't have anything to do with m-" James was cut off by a first year girl grabbing onto his arm, tears forming in her eyes.
"Sorry, but I need help. I want to go home. Take me back to the train please," said the girl in a small voice.
"Oh no, you wouldn't want to go and do a silly thing like that. Think of all you'd be missing out on. All of your friends would stay and learn spells and magic, and you wouldn't know any of it." James said in a comforting voice.
"I don't have any friends here. I don't know anyone. I'm a muggle-born, I'll never be able to do any of this. I might as well go home now," the girl said, now almost choking on tears. James leaned down to her level and tried to stop her crying.
"Hey now, being muggle-born doesn't change a thing. None of the other kids grew up doing magic, they just grew up around it. And besides, one of the brightest witches I know is muggle-born," James smiled up at Lily as he said this. Her heart skipped a beat. More than a beat actually…
"And trust me, you'll make friends. I didn't know anyone when I came, and I ended up with three great, loyal best friends. Friends I'll keep my entire life. You'll make some too, I promise," James straightened back up.
"I guess I could stick around for a little while…. just to see what things are like," the girl fell back into the group with the other first years.
Lily couldn't help but feel a little touched when he had talked about his friends. It showed his deeper and more caring side. Sure his friends were immature and loud and obnoxious. But behind all that, they truly cared for each other, and would stick together through anything. Lily had always had a soft spot for loyalty like that.
"You were very sweet to that girl," Lily complimented.
"It was no big deal," James said with a shrug, "I was nervous too." They arrived at the fat lady and Lily stopped the students. This is the portrait into the Gryffindor common room. The password is," Lily turned to face the fat lady, "Hopping hippogriffs." The portrait swung open and everyone filed into the already full common room.
"Right now," Lily said regaining their attention, "Girls dormitories are up the stairs to the right and the boys on the left. Your trunks have already been brought up to your rooms. Remember to contact either of us if you have any questions." The students left to find their rooms.
"I'd say that was a job well done." James said with a smile.
"I would also," Lily agreed, "you know it's funny how nice you were to that girl. I mean last year you would have taken any chance you got to torment a first year."
"Yes, well," James rubbed the back of his neck, slightly blushing, "I guess everyone grows up sometime."
"I guess so…" Lily said.
"So… do you suppose you'll ever tell me what you found so captivating back in the Great Hall?" James asked.
"Oh, I'm afraid I'll have to someday." Lily answered looking at him.
"What do you mean by that?" James asked. But before Lily could answer, Alexis had walked over, and grabbed James by the arm, and mumbled something about sitting with her and her friends. James looked back and gave Lily an apologetic look before sitting down. Lily, not seeing her friends, decided to go look for them in the dormitory.
"Molly, Alice, are either of you here?' Lily called out.
"We're back here Lily," a voice came from one of the four-poster beds in the corner, "So how were head duties with James?"
"They were good. If anything, they squashed any doubts in my mind about liking James Potter," she said flopping down onto her bed. "It seems I am totally, completely, insanely head over heels. How on earth did this happen over the course of a day?"
"It didn't," Alice said, "you've always liked James, and you've only just realized it."
"You know Lily, I'm sure if you talked to him about it, you might be pleasantly surprised," Molly said, "He liked you too long to drop those feelings over a summer."
"I wish you were right," said Lily. She got up to change clothes, washed her face, and made an early night of it.
The next few weeks were torture for Lily. Being head girl, she had to keep order in the halls, on top of getting to classes, and completely insanely hard homework. In fact, her only outlets of sanity were her nightly patrols through the halls with head boy, James Potter. They were hardly patrolling, as they were too busy in conversation. Lily found so much out about James. Everything from old pets, to the cartoons on his old bed sheets. There were so many fun and, interesting things she never knew about him because she spent all her time avoiding him. Now she wished she hadn't. So many times, he asked me out, so many chances I had to say yes, but I took them for granted, and now they'll never come again.
Every night, without fail, James would always ask her what she was thinking about that first day in the Great Hall. She hardly think he really cared about the answer anymore. Just that it was a bit of theirs, and he liked to keep it going.
One pleasant Saturday a rarity occurred at Hogwarts. It seemed that students were beginning to catch up on homework and actually have free time. It was one of these rare evening that Molly, Lily, Sirius and James were all sitting by the fire in their armchairs. Alexis, who had been pursuing James for a month now, without fail, kept looking across the room at James, and then would proceed to giggle with her friends. It was driving Lily absolutely insane.
"Good Lord those girls giggle a lot," commented Molly.
"I've never liked girls that giggle all the time." Sirius returned, slouched down low in the chair, with a cute, but lazy look on his face, "It means their dainty and girly. And dainty, girly girls, will never do anything exciting or adventurous for fear of breaking a nail. And that would simply be the end of the world. No the best sort of girls have nice, hearty laughs, ready to face anything with you. Kind of like yours, Molly," Lily saw her friend turn a deep shade of red.
"Hey Lily, its about time to head out for patrols," said James, now turning to Sirius and Molly, "You both will probably be in bed by the time I leave, so goodnight."
"Goodnight," Molly and Sirius said in unison. Alexis and the girls, noticing that James was leaving, were heading upstairs, leaving Molly and Sirius alone in the common room. As Alexis walked upstairs she glared hard at Lily, and shot James a fake, but large smile.
"Shall we?" James asked pointed out the portrait hole.
"We shall," answered Lily with a smile. The two started down the hall. James was mainly looking around, giving Lily a chance to admire his features. Clearly, Quidditch did wonders for the abs, as Lily could clearly see through James's band t-shirt.
I wonder if they came naturally, or if he worked for them. And God, look at those biceps. I wonder what it would be like to be held in something that strong. So secure. So safe…
"It's about time Sirius and Molly got alone together. Sirius has liked her for ages," James commented with a chuckle.
"What?" Lily asked, "Molly has liked him forever practically."
"You're kidding! Wow, you know the only reason Sirius was holding off on asking her out was because he never thought she'd go for it. After all, Molly is so quiet and so smart and accomplished. And we figured since she was friends with you, she probably hated our guts and thought us annoyingly immature."
"Actually, that was the very thing Molly liked about Sirius," said Lily matter-of-factly.
They walked a little bit further down the quiet halls. Again, Lily found herself caught up in James.
His hair looks like a bunch of feathers, she thought to herself. I bet it would feel great to just run my fingers through it.
Then it hit her. This was her last year at Hogwarts. Her last year to set things right. She couldn't stay wondering what it would be like to date him anymore. She needed to experience it. The worst that could happen is that he would turn her down. And then it would just be one year. And they could still probably be friends afterwards. After all, she'd turned him down countless times, and look at what good friends they were now.
She needed to make a move. Now. She'd just tell him that things had changed. That she'd developed feelings. Big feelings. Inescapable feelings. Feelings that were telling her to act now.
Here goes nothing…. She thought to herself
Lily stopped where she was standing in the hall. James walked a few steps, then realized she wasn't there.
"What is it Lily?" James asked.
"Why don't you ask me out anymore?" Lily blurted. James repositioned himself uncomfortably, not saying anything, so Lily continued.
"I mean what happened? Have I become hideous, or annoying, or just frightfully unattractive? Do you like someone else?" Lily questioned. James let out a grunt and looked down, with his hands in his pockets.
"You hated it when I asked you out Lily. I mean it may have taken me 6 years, but a boy does finally get the point." James said.
"Yea but that before the compartment and the hall and that stupid gigglebox and the first years and the patrols, and the feathers, and…." Lily looked up at the completely baffled look on his face.
"Oh come on, you know, the train, the first years, and the patrols?" Lily went on.
"No, but I did hear a great one about a Rabbi, a Priest and a Duc-"James said
"Totally not the time James," said Lily sternly. She looked up at him, realizing that he wasn't going to make this any easier.
"Look James maybe all those years I was turning you down, and yelling at you, and calling you things like toe-rags, well maybe all those years those very public and clear displays of pure hatred, were more directed at the immature you, while the me that's not yelling and screaming about things, actually doesn't hate the you now, in fact she finds that you're almost agreeable at times, and at time she may find you tolerable, and at of few of her crazier moments she might even like you a bit, and when she feels completely insane, she actually tells herself that she could very well be, well in love."
"Lily?" James asked, stepping closer
"Yes," she replied, feeling her eyes tear up.
"Why are you talking in third person?" James asked.
"I have no idea, and this was probably all a mistake, and maybe if you could forget anything I said, that would work." Lily turned on her heel and started down the hall, when she felt a strong arm grab hers and spin her around in expert motion. He spun her up to him and leaned down and kissed her before she had a chance to recover.
And it was the most wonderful thing Lily ever experienced. Lily reached out of his grasp and ran her hands through his feather like hair. James put one hand around her waist, pulling her in even closer, and rested another hand around her mid back and she leaned back, letting James hold her up and deepen the kiss. Who knows how long they stayed like that. They had six years to make up for, and didn't plan on wasting any time.
But of course the whole issue of their lungs got in the way. So they eventually needed air.
"James, we were down patrolling twenty minutes ago," Lily whispered in- between kisses, "We'll get in trouble by Filch."
"Who cares about Filch?" James said playfully as he kissed up her neck, "He can throw me in a dungeon for all I care, as long as you'll come along to keep me company."
"Yes well as lovely as that sounds, we probably should get back," said Lily, showing the disappointment in her voice.
"Yea I guess," said James and he swooped down and kissed her firmly on the mouth. He stood back up, and wrapped an arm around her waist, as she hugged against him. They walked back down to the common room.
"Hopping Hippogriffs," Lily said happier than she'd been in a long time. The portrait swung open and as Lily and James walked through, expecting to find an empty common room, they were met with the site of Molly and Sirius kissing feverishly by the fire. Lily, not wanting to spy, loudly cleared her throat. Immediately, both heads bobbed up.
"My my we heads leave the common room for an hour and hormones go insane," said James, "tsk, tsk, tsk." Sirius gave a sheepish grin, but eyed James and Lily's position, and a smirk emerged on his face.
"Well well it seems we weren't the only ones to go off emotion tonight," Sirius said smiling. James and Lily were blushing profusely.
"Yes, and there'll be no interfering on your part, got it?" James asked.
"Oh of course, I wouldn't dream of messing with Hogwarts hottest new couple. Oh wait, seeing as I'm hotter than you, I suppose I take that title. However, I promise not to interfere, simply tease mercilessly." Sirius said with his trademark grin.
"Likewise," replied James. A voice called from upstairs.
"Oh James, is that you?" Alexis came bounding down the stairs in skimpy pajamas that only suggested she'd been waiting up for him.
"Oh I thought I heard you come in," she said with a giggle, but almost at lightening speed, her sugarcoated expression, turned to a menacing glare.
"James, why is Lily's arm around your waist?" she inquired trying to keep her honey voice.
"The same reason mine is around hers," he replied coolly, "we're dating."
Alexis glared long and hard at Lily before regaining composure to respond.
"Yes well I suppose everyone has their flings," Alexis said in her false voice, "but whenever you come to your senses, which I assume will be sometime soon, you know where I am."
"Hmmm sorry but I don't see me coming to my senses anytime soon. Not when I'm this crazy in love," James said with a crooked smile, "Right babe?"
"Of course," she replied with a huge smile.
James then proceed to lean down and give her another long kiss, if possible, even more glorious than the first.
"Hey Lils?" James asked.
"Yea James?" Lily replied.
"What was it, or should I say who was it that had you so captivated that day in the great hall?" James asked with a playful smirk. Lily returned his twisted expression,
"Take a wild guess."