People think I'm dumb. I am I guess. Well I know I'm not smart, not when it comes to lessons and school and well knowledge. But I see things. I notice how the clouds form shapes in the sky like white fluffy shape shifters. I notice how even though Puck puts on a tough exterior, he's just a softie. I see the way he looks at Quinn, like she's his sunshine, the way he looks at Finn, so sad that he's lost his one and only best friend. I notice how determined Matt looks when he sings - just because he's not the lead, it doesn't faze him. I look at Mike looking at Tina looking at Artie. The pain in his eyes breaks my heart. The way Finn and Rachel's hearts beat in time. She tries to boss him around, but really she likes it when he takes the lead. Mercedes is so angry and frustrated all the time. I can see it hidden behind her diva-ish personality. And Kurt. Kurt is just a little boy swamped in nice clothes and great hair. Hiding behind his beautiful face is an even more beautiful child. Waiting to become a man. I notice how Mr Shuester looks so longingly at Rachel and Finn and Artie and Tina and Quinn and Puck. His misses his wife, who she used to be. He needs that funny guidance counsellor to love him, and need him too.
And then there's Santana. I notice her all the time. But nothing about her - she's built up a wall of popularity and fake beauty and angry, angry voices. But she was beautiful. Before, when we were kids and we'd play at the park. But that Santana's gone… All I want is for her to be happy. She pretends she is and she's so obviously not. Sometimes, in glee practices, she'll sing, and there'll be that glimmer in her eye. When she laughs - which isn't often - it's warm and loving and heartfelt. Then it's gone and the other Santana is back - the one who thinks it's too much to return a smile.
She's lost a part of herself. And I need to help her find it - I will, I promise. My one goal in life is to make my San the happiest girl in the world. I need her laugh and her smile and her love. But for now, I'll take her pinkie, and I'll make do. Until I find that part of her… and make her beautiful again.